>>29648760

Stop eating and go on a hunger strike. You can live for a couple of months without food, but people will become concerned after a couple of days.

Remember to stay hydrated, and exercise a bit sop you don't lose too much muscle.

>>29648760
>What's the best way to fake a suicide attempt?
are you a woman?

>>29648808
I'm already anorexic, so nobody would care.

>>29648823
No.

>>29648760
cut your wrists and bleed everywhere but make sure someone will find you within a short period of time.

good luck not dying, idiot.

take a bunch of aspirin, call poison control immediately. Maybe even call them before you take the aspirin to better your chances.
You will get your stomach pumped, but it will look like a legitimate attempt

>>29649088
>but it will look like a legitimate attempt
wait how? all it will do is thin your blood, right?

Slit your wrists and fall asleep in the bath tub

>>29649521
Enough aspirin is enough to kill you. Or at least put you into a coma.
Just say you weren't thinking straight and were just wanting to get over your headache, had an intrusive thought and figured you'd follow it because anything is better then living.
Make sure poison control is on the way though, and don't induce vomiting. Be ready to have a tube shoved down your throat as well.
Be careful if you try anything anon. Could fuck up and leave you a drooling retard the rest of your life.

>>29648760
Have your first middle school crush betray you and break your heart fugitively and literally. Then when you get sent to hell have a flaming 21 year old former police officer direct you to the exit.