Who else /notmeanttohavefriends/ here?
>fall for the just talk to people meme
>lunch time
>sit with a stranger who is eating alone
>try to start conversation
>they give half-assed replies and look like they want to leave
>stop talking and only ask a question every once in a while
>finish eating
>"it was nice to meet you"
>never want to talk to people again
>>29599730
>>try to start conversation
>>they give half-assed replies and look like they want to leave
>>stop talking and only ask a question every once in a while
This is how every conversation goes for me, whether it's someone I met online or in person.
Fuck everyone
Especially fuck the people in r9k 'friends threads'.
>>29599730
I think friends aren't even worth the effort
you gotta try so hard, and in the end what's the point? I can already talk to people here
and if I say dumb shit then nobody knows who I am once I go to another thread. it's perfect. all the benefits of friendship with none of the cons
physical relationships in general are a meme
>>29599875
>try to make internet friends
>join a discord
>try to talk to people
>don't really know what to say
>after a while get asked "why are you so quiet?"
Fucking normies
Congratulations you are an adolescent male
>>29600024
>discord
wew lad
Every discord that you'll find around here is cliquey as fuck, there's always some attentionwhore 'cuteboi' and half the people there are normie as fuck anyway.
>>29599730
I find it hard, too. A lot of people I see who are 'socially awkward' have literally no problem talking with others.
>See my crush alone outside, looking bored
>okay, this is it. don't fuck this up.
>I say hello, ask her how her day was.
>she gives me a half-assed smile and nods 'Yeah, it was good thanks.'
>think for a moment on how to continue since she isn't giving me follow-ups
>"so... we're on the same bus- and I see you a lot by yourself- who do you hang around with?"
>heart skipping, barely able to keep it all together, my will breaking as the look on her face flatlines
>'my friends.' she replies
>sigh and walk away, trying to keep my mask intact
I literally can't even talk to you lot either, all I want to do is talk about stuff, whatever the hell comes to my mind, I should be allowed to talk to somebody, not slowly marginalised by everybody who sees people like us as a public annoyance.
Why even bother trying when all previous attempts have ended in failure, worsening your future chances even more.
Fuck, me so much.
>First week as a freshman in high school
>lunch period happens
>sit alone for days
>after a few days, seek out a seemingly older goth group at one table. All the older goths in middle school liked me, so these people can't be too bad.
>ask if i can sit with them
>they oblige
>can't think of anything interesting to say to them because I'm so self-conscious already.
>They seem to accept me but don't really acknowledge me.
>I know I'm the weirdo.
>I go to the guidance counselor and ask for a study hall instead of a lunch period.
>They argue that I need a lunch period.
>I get my mom to sign off to it.
>mfw in 4 years of high school, I intentionally never had a lunch period, just to avoid having to eat lunch alone or hide in the bathrooms.
>tfw i never had the sense of community that the other nerds had at lunch. I just always sucked at socializing.
>>29600163
>>tfw i never had the sense of community that the other nerds had at lunch. I just always sucked at socializing.
This is what bothers me. There are 'weirdos', people who have somewhat nerdy interests like D&D or video games or comics, but they still manage some sort of community, and find a group of people who enjoy their company, in which everyone is friends with everyone else in the group. Meanwhile such a community is incredibly foreign and hard to imagine for myself, despite having a few obscure nerdy interests and a few somewhat normal interests, and not being incredibly hideous. I just don't understand where everything went so wrong.
>>29600024
Exact same thing happened to me.
Just be yourself guys it eventually works out
>start college
>try to talk with people I sit with in lectures
>they never ask me anything, I have to initiate everything(which is already hard for me)
So eventually I stopped trying. One year and no friends, which makes its too late since everyone is already in a group of friends after the first two weeks.
>>29600256
>There are 'weirdos', people who have somewhat nerdy interests like D&D or video games or comics, but they still manage some sort of community, and find a group of people who enjoy their company, in which everyone is friends with everyone else in the group. Meanwhile such a community is incredibly foreign and hard to imagine for myself, despite having a few obscure nerdy interests and a few somewhat normal interests, and not being incredibly hideous.
>fall for the "just join a club" meme
>go to my schools anime club
>find someone else who is sitting alone
>try to talk to them
>ask them what animes they've watched so i can try to get something to talk about
>"I don't watch much anime"
>???
>well whatever, we can talk about the anime that's being shown tonight
>we watch literally 1 episode
>"i'm going to leave now I only stayed for this one episode"
>o-oh, bye
They worst part is I still kept going until I just gave up after a few weeks.
>>29600256
Yeah man. You described it better than I could. I just became accustomed to being alone after a while, and not even similar interests/ trying to be likable were enough for me to get along with anyone. I just don't know what went wrong..
>>29600256
Exact same here. With every attempt I made to befriend the "geeks" they wound up treating me even worse than the average normie or chad. Even THEY won't accept me.
>mfw
>>29600256
r9k is the only community i've ever had
>>29599730
even i can make friends and im a piece of shit that dropped a group of 6 people that liked me and asked me to hang out because they all live way too far away and i was tired of having to take the train everywhere.
I cant even picture the sorry excuse for a human you guys are irl
>>29599730
You approached this in an incredibly autistic fashion. One person wanting some quiet time during their lunch doesn't mean you're not meant to have friends, it just means you're willing to try to force something that totally isn't going to happen because you lack the social skills to process when to leave people alone.
>>29600163
During my high school years, I just helped the janitor cleaning teacher's rooms during lunch. Eventually the school allowed me to do tasks for teachers during lunch too.
>>29599730
Same shit, OP
Repeatedly negative experiences have discouraged me to the point where I don't even try anymore. I'm tired of trying and feeling like shit afterwards. I don't know what quality it is about me that makes people just immediately reject me. I naturally just repel people. I guess some folks really are just meant to be alone.
>>29601011
>dropping friends
Fuck off, Chad.
>>29599730
Same here. I have literally not a single friend at all. Sometimes I interact with someone and think we're friends, and I get really happy and excited (as stupid as that sounds), and when I talk to them later they don't care for me at all. Not in a bad way, and I'm not being spiteful, I just realize that all we did was talk once or so and in my complete lack of normal interaction with humans the event was magnified. Then I realize that I'm so lonely that even tiny amounts of interaction get overblown. Then I think about how stupid I am for exaggerating what happened in my head. Then I spiral into self-loathing until I interact with someone again, etc. etc.
I don't even have internet friends. Nobody has one-on-one conversations with me or initiates individual contact and asks me about my day. It really wears me down. Sometimes my loneliness gets so bad I start to feel almost claustrophobic.
>wake up, laying there in that half-awake half-dreaming state
>there's some new messages on my phone
>it's some people I used to talk to on the Internet, they want to see what's up and hang out
>get excited, nobody ever goes out of their way to contact me
>go to write a response
>not holding my phone
>shake myself out of that groggy state
>check my phone
>nothing, I was just dreaming
>lay in bed feeling pathetic and stupid
>>29601600
>phone buzzes
>random person I added from /r9k/ a month ago finally responds
>repky with a follow up message
>no response
:(
I'm friends with my neighbour's cat. We sit out in the street together, saying nothing, occasionally patting, until one of us walks back to their respective house, ending the meeting. This has been going on for nearly 10 years now. My best friend is a cat.
>notice some people I talk to online have a Twitter
>wow wouldn't it be nice if I could talk to these people more and see what's going on in their lives, and then they would talk to me and see what's going on in my life, we'd be friends!
>decide to get an account
>follow Internet friends and others
>post some stuff over a week, things that are going on in my life, pictures
>none of them talk to me, just have their own conversations
>nobody comments or notices what I post
>nobody cares when I reply to other posts
>realize I'm just posting into the void, nobody cares or is listening
>feel so incredibly embarrassed looking over everything because I ACTUALLY thought people cared or wanted to know about my life
>feel too embarrassed and stupid to post again
I still feel ashamed and dumb about it. Why did I ever think that? Here's a picture of my cat. I take a lot of them but don't post them anymore.
>>29601769
the shape of cat's ears are really interesting. they're like radars that can be swiveled
If you are having trouble making friends online, just be overtly nice. When you're trying to talk to someone, just imagine if you were in there position and then think to yourself about what you would like to hear. Then just do that
The worst part of being friendless is having nobody to talk to about it.
When you post on /r9k/ you either get ignored, made fun of ("haha stupid wannabe normie"), or stupid advice about being yourself or how it's really your own fault for not having friends. I just want some damn empathy.
>>29601769
That's pretty much why I ditched social media. In the end no one really cares that I took a cool picture and just ignore it. Cute cat though, I took this in France
>>29601883
>I just want some damn empathy.
then maybe you shuld have chosen to be born a woman
>>29601900
This is pretty much the exact kind of response I was talking about, thanks.
>>29601888
I like your French cat picture.
>>29601911
>comes on 4chan
>gets bootyemotionallyblasted when people roast him
>>29601927
Do you have friends anon?
>was literally the autistic kid in school
>no one ever talked to me
>so just did my own thing all the time during lunch
>made no friends
>punched head mistress one time
>Went on week long trip to this camp with class
>during trip get into autistic rage mode
>say I was going to go home
>didn't
>years later no one remembers me being there after that even though I stayed
>>29601925
Thanks anon. Can you guess where this one is from?japan
>>29601888
Well if you took it from france they might want it back. Shit tier jok I know but anyway nice picture
>>29601981
Cute Japanese cat. Here's another picture. He was sleeping but then there was a noise outside that woke him up.
>>29601993
Haha thanks, I honestly haven't heard that one before :P
>>29599730
Add me on steam friends, we can pretend to be real life friends!
So this is my first r9k thread It's kinda neat
So here's a question can you only say things you haven't said before or things no one one the r9k has said before?
>>29602078
>steam friends
I've heard that one before anon. I know how these things turn out. This isn't my first time on this wild ride.
>>29602086
Where are you originally from?
>>29602042
He looks like a really silly cat :P
>tfw you will never just be normal
>tfw you will never engage in normal human interactions
>>29602106
The latter.
>>29602048
What breed is this?
>>29602086
What part of 4chan or do you mean the world?
>>29602140
Either way uk and b but I didn't stay long
>>29602132
No clue, there was a little pet shop down an alley way and I can't read Japanese but they seemed pretty expensive
>>29602078
>add someone from a steam thread
>talk about anime
>removes me the day after for some reason
I don't trust you. Besides, i'm poor and my computer is shit. I don't have many games.
>>29602250
>>29602111
I too have had bad experiences, but I have hope! I don't know anything about anime though. We don't have to play games either, we could just talk.
>>29602353
What would we talk about then, hopeful anon.
>>29602436
What do you like, cute anon?
>>29599875
>discord
Was a mistake
>>29602561
I think it would be nice if I had someone to talk to about my trying to make a tulpa. Is that something you'd be interested in?
>>29602765
>had only one friend that I liked to talk to for hours through steam
>he decides talking to all of 3 other people individually is too hard and makes a discord channel
>him and the others start using voice and playing games together more and more
>get left out of everything because I don't like using voice
>now have no friends
fuck discord
>>29599730
>have 3 friends who NEVER invite me anywhere
>we only hang out after i invite them, and making plans is a rigorous as fuck process since they are always busy
>always get the feeling that they dont actually want to hang out and they are just getting 'hanging out with me' over with
anybody else feel this way.
>>29603135
Yeah. Whenever I stop going out of my way to contact others I realize nobody cares enough about me to initiate contact on their own. It really sucks
>>29603135
>>29603452
I understand its a really bad feeling :(
>>29601950
>do you have friends?
>/r9k/
>>29603135
>just getting 'hanging out' over with
Nobody actually does this. Don't be so insecure
>>29601769
I just use my twitter to dump whatever negative thoughts I have without caring who reads them. I thought it might help me feel better. It doesn't.
>>29599730
i dont want friends they're fucking annoying
The worst part is that having no friends makes it even harder to make them. Your social value goes down, and people don't want to associate with you in return. The ride never ends.
>>29600256
>There are 'weirdos', people who have somewhat nerdy interests like D&D or video games or comics, but they still manage some sort of community, and find a group of people who enjoy their company, in which everyone is friends with everyone else in the group.
Not anymore. This was last possible 15 years ago, then normalfags invaded all kinds of "nerdy" hobbies and made it all about the social hierarchy and purchasing power, so "nerds" are just rampant indiscriminate hyperconsumers now.
>make a friend
>they get sick of my depression
>>29605906
>so "nerds" are just rampant indiscriminate hyperconsumers now.
you ain't kidding.
I'm too paranoid to have any friends.
"Why are they talking to me?"
"They probably want to make fun or take advantage of me"
"They talk shit behind my back"
etc
>>29605850
Also the less you interact with people the worse your social skills get. I have a job that requires almost no interpersonal communication, and I moved to a different part of my city and apparently none of my """"friends"""" thought it was worth it to stay in touch, so I basically have been completely socially isolated for the past year. I can barely even functionally speak anymore, my voice always sounds hoarse and awkward, and I never know what to say even to simple questions. The worst part is that I have a pretty solid theoretical grasp on what I should be doing so I just recognize what I'm doing wrong as I'm doing it without being able to do anything about it. I get tense and even more anxious and honestly I should just kill myself.
>>29600024
>why are you so quiet
I get asked this so much IRL I almost give no fucks anymore. I just say theres nothing to be said desu.
>>29599875
If it's any consolation, I've stopped talking to people in /r9k/ friends threads because I got social anxiety. I thought it was gonna be fine because it's just a stranger online but no even that's too much. Maybe it wasn't your fault.
>>29603135
>>29603452
Idk about you but as a robot I'm very uncomfortable asking people to hang out
