be honest...how many times have you thought about it?
>>29577819
Every day of my life for the past two years.
The only reason I don't do it is because it would devastate my mother.
If she were dead I would have done it years ago.
This is /r9k/ not a day goes by where we don't all think about it
>>29577819
Pretty much every day for the last couple of years
>>29577851
I know how you feel my man
>>29577819
I regularly consider it after everyday after work. I want to just careen into a guardrail or speed as fast as I can go without stopping until I hit a wall. Thinking of doing something dangerous like getting a motorcycle so at least then I can blame it on an accident. If that works out then at least I have a cool new hobby.
>>29577819
multiple times per day every day since I was 14
I'm 21 nowI'm surprised I've made it this long
can anybody give advice on actually doing it? I can't convince myself and can't think of a very effective way (guns not available).
>>29577819
Almost every day. It used to be pure fantasy and coping but nowadays i think im seriously thinking on doing it someday. Im 25 now. Idk, if things dont change within ten years idk what im going to do. The main reason i dont do it now is because my Dad would be devastated and I cant do that to him. I have literally never admitted it to anyone either.
>>29577819
Sometimes I think about it in the same way that you think about throwing your wallet and keys off of a bridge when you're walking over it and then I cringe the fuck out.
>>29577819
Everyday
I still have hope for some reason though
>>29577919
>get a motorcycle
>start to like it
you cant win
I think about it on a daily basis
But I just think about it, that's all, I hate the concept of death so i'm nowhere near killing myself
I consider it just about every day.
Have a couple plans in mind for it.
I haven't done it for two reasons:
I don't want my dad to walk in and find my dead body.
And the thought of attempting and failing and then ending up as a vegetable for the rest of what would be my "life" terrifies me.
>>29577969
Anyone who has done it isn't around to give advice.
I'm killing myself before december, so yes, I think about it a lot.
Saying "I should die" is basically a nervous tic for me at this point
Every day since I was about 12 years old.
Do normies really never think about suicide? That's unimaginable to me.
I never mention being suicidal to anyone non-anonymously, because apparently you get institutionalized for even mentioning it
I'm too afraid to die.
>>29578617
Same here. Saying to myself "Kill me" and "wanna kill myself" became a reflex to pretty much everything I consider bad.
How can anyone enjoy existing? Brief moments of pleasure just aren't worth the constant pain, fear, and disappointment.
Thousands, but thats normal for total losers.
I now have the know how to wigfle my way into an ideal life, so its extremely unlikely that id kill myself.
>>29577819
Not even lying. Since I was molested by a shrink at age 8 I have been suicidal. Now I have drawn out a whole philosophy with the core idea being that one cannot actually live in good faith because even something as fundamental as thermodynamics proves that life is inequitable.
who /waitingforparentstodiesoicanhangmyself/
>>29577851
>Every day of my life
>for the past two years.
>>29579047
>thermodynamics
Don't try to talk about things you know nothing about
>>29579104
>watta tootleloodle
>foota mudajug
>>29577969
Autoerotic asphyxiation, heroin, cops, noncut helium
>>29579126
I don't need to be STEM masterrace to see that the human body is hardly efficient and that the human mind is magnitudes less so.
All day every day. The only thing trapping me here is my family.
>>29579104
>2 years ago he started contemplating the reason he hasn't killed himself yet
>did it every day since then
hello? not hard to understand
![23535632-A-office-worker-is-setting-up-a-noose-Stock-Photo[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/th8KG0I.jpg "23535632-A-office-worker-is-setting-up-a-noose-Stock-Photo[1].jpg")
At least once a day since 2011. My life turned to shit then and keeps getting worse.
The only reason I don't now is becauseI somehow got a gf three years ago and it would irreparably devastate her psyche if she lost me.
Constantly. Too often than I'd like.
If I've done nothing worth while with my life, no proper career or in a loving relationship by the time I'm 30, I'll probably kill myself then.
I've got 8 - 9 years to fix my life.How hard can it be?
>>29577819
too many to count, but I can't because my cousin needs me.
>>29577969
Live near a forest? Hike into the middle of it where no one will find you, bring a rope/maybe a ladder, climb a tall tree that has a sturdy branch, walk out on branch, tie rope to branch, tie noose to neck, jump.
You only need about 5 meters for a clean, painless break.
I think about it almost every day. However, I have never attempted it.
>>29577819
Literally everyday. Even when I recently became celibate from technology for two months. "Get off 4chan" is a meme.
>>29579696
If you'd like, call the authorities just before you do it. Tell them who you are, exactly where you are and what you intend to do.
Just so that some random passerby doesn't get scarred for life by.
>>29577819
The first time I started to considering it seriously was when I realized I was a repressed tranny back when I was 18. After that I had a lot of high and lows with times when I considered it again, but never actually attempted it.
Now I'm 25, still a closeted tranny, depressed (taking sertraline 50mg and aripiprazol 15mg daily) and about to fail (again) at college. So yeah, I'm considering it again. In fact I live in a 14th floor, it would be quite easy to just jump and finish it, but I don't have the balls to do it. God, I just want this to end quickly. Why did I got the "sick tranny brain" card? It fucking sucks.
I could never do it but It passes through my mind every so often. That quote that "its a big decision for such a small issue" Really sticks with me.
>>29577819
Several times a day, usually. I recently went like a week without thinking about it at all, I'm not sure why.
>>29579849
Quit being a filthy tranny scum and go to a good church
>>29577969
If you're 18 and live in the US, you can buy ammunition just by showing your ID. Buy a shotgun shell, hold it between your teeth plastic side in, and hold a lighter to it.
>>29579104
qualifiers, anon
I used to think about it every day, then it became every hour of every day, then at its worst it was pretty much on my mind consistently.
My life and depression have improved and now I hardly every think about it.
I don't really think about it but I tried it once (I think) when I was drunk. I woke up with my inner thigh and hands all carved up with broken glass from a picture frame. I think I was going for my femoral.
I know drunk me is an asshole but this is ridiculous.
Everyday. I have a wife and kids ( reereeree!) and they need me. In fact, I'm the linchpin in a lot of people's lives. Im worthless to myself but valuable to others.
Otherwise, i would load up on powerful anticoagulants and shoot myself in the head. My life is a hell, but I make heaven for others.
every single day. i don't do it because i don't know what's beyond death
>>29579875
>le church meme
No, thanks. I don't think adding reasons for hating myself for being a tranny is actually a good idea.
I also have problems with the whole believing thing. Not that is a bad thing, but I just can't blindly believe that there's an invisible dude who created everything and that loves us deeply, specially considering how my life have turned out until this point.
>>29578623
I've flat-out told my therapist every time he's asked "yes, multiple times a day and pretty much nonstop when I lie in bed at night" and he always asks if I've got a plan made or think I'll act on the thoughts.
"No plan, but I don't know what the next week might bring."
No joke, they made me promise not to kill myself when I started therapy. The woman talking to me didn't even crack a smile when I said "if I do, it's not like I'll be around to feel guilty for it."
Tl;dr: you have to either attempt suicide or straight up tell somebody you have a plan and intend to do it
>>29578829
'Life is grief, with flashes of ecstacy...
If love and time are defined, nevermind, it's mine it's mine it's mine'
Dat feel
>>29580022
>He fell for the "being a tranny isn't a choice" meme
>>29580216
Being a tranny is a choice. Feeling like one isn't.
I've already decided to do it, not out of depression but just because life is a pointless endeavor with nothing to be gained. Only reason I'm still alive is my country's BS gun laws, but I'm slowly working my way around to meet all the requirements, then I'll either end it in .38 or 12 gauge, whichever is easier to get.
>>29580277
Wow, you are a dick.
In a country that already has tight gun laws, you'd become part of a statistic that would reinforce that just because you're a pussy?
People die because of people like you.
>>29580277
The .38 seems easier to get.
Remember, don't put the gun in your temple, but inside your mouth with a slight upper inclination. That way you will destroy your brainstem, killing you instantly.
>>29580339
It's a crappy country full of faggots and criminals around every corner like every nogunz shithole, I don't give a fuck. My life is my own and my (theoretical) gun is my property, if I desire to use it to end my life I'm perfectly entitled to do so. Plus murder rates are already abysmal yet leftards still insist that guns are bad, don't see how a 0.000000000001% increase in suicide rates would be particularly bad.
>>29580386
Yeah I was thinking that, either through the mouth or instead of the temple a bit above/behind it. The best spot seems to be from the back of the head though, kinda hard to think of a way to direct it properly however.
Everyday. Just quit my job so I could do it, but now I'm NEET again and don't want to. I plan to purchase everything I need to do it while I still have money though.
>>29580420
I'd probably hang if I ever decided to do it.
Less risk of winding up in a wheelchair and diapers, I can vividly imagine pulling the trigger and being just self-aware enough upon waking up/the shock easing to realize I fucked up and life will be both worse than ever and totally inescapable on my terms.
There is no worse hell that I can imagine. That moment of "I shouldn't be alive, what have I done" and the hours of hoping I die before I'm found and treated.
Hanging seems just fine. Having been choked unconscious really puts it into perspective. A few seconds of panic and then everything flicks off.
>>29578616
What's in December? I'm killing myself tomorrow. I need to get the space cleared out to hang myself. Noose is already tied up
>>29580522
Actually headshots have a higher chance of success:
http://lostallhope.com/suicide-methods/statistics-most-lethal-methods
>>29580576
I'd be smart enough to make sure the rope will hold, to be far from anybody who could find me, to pick a sturdy place to tie the rope and use a good knot and to both leave any knives far away and drop far enough that my legs couldn't grab my anchor reflexively.
Gotta be thorough.
I tried to kill myself once and it didn't work and hurt alot so now the fear of the pain of another botched suicide is what keeps me from trying again.
Tried it once with a bedsheet. It stretched too low and I was just dangling barely above the ground for a few seconds before I gave up. It hurt like shit. This was 9 months ago, but I still haven't found the energy to untie the bedsheet. It's just lying around in my closet.
>>29580686
I bought like 100 feet of twine for camping trips for like a dollar (I was with my ex, just looking at this stuff reminds me why I need to die) and it's weak stuff by itself. So I'm hand-braiding it into sturdy rope.
Makes the whole thing very intimate, like a ritual. I'm very meticulous about it, making sure it's perfect.
I hope she sees, I hope she remembers the day we went shopping for that first hike and realizes why I chose this method. I hope it eats her up inside and leaves her empty, the way our breakup made me.
>>29580908
I like that plan
>>29581011
Thanks. I'm a romantic at heart, this is like proposing in Paris but with suicide.
a few times but no planning
I work and make money but it's all for nothing except my own continued survival, what else is there for me?
The only thing keeping me here is that at least watching events unfold is interesting. I want to know all I can before dying.
But I think about dying pretty much every day. On the way to work, on the way home. I feel like an ultimate cuck, I work and pay taxes but society gives me nothing in return, I work so that others can receive the gifts of society like a family, a wife, children, acceptance, and all I get is my cuckbucks that I can use to buy distractions and alcohol that blind me to how hard I'm getting fucked.
>>29580010
I've seen a quote that goes something like "suicide is what happens when your coping resources can't match the pain you feel" or something equally wrong.
Suicide becomes viable when your fear of the unknown is overshadowed by your desire to stop existing. Simple as that.
>>29577969
strap on suicide vest, and run into area - 51
>>29581269
How likely is it that she sees?
>>29581427
For what it's worth, I'd legit like to have a drink with you.
I'm tired of dealing with vapid people every day who float through life in blissful ignorance.
Not even fedora, just jaded. I remember being one of those happy people and being all jokes. One day it just clicked: I'm only outgoing and fun because other people like it. This isn't me.
I've never felt so alien to the people around me as I do now. Or as I will tomorrow. It's like I peeked behind the curtain, saw a dick and now the puppet show is ruined.
would think about shooting myself but too pussy but I would take crazy different pills in large quantities not caring if I died.
>>29581476
She lives a town over, but our families keep in touch now and then. She'd hear about it.
And my mother is stereotypically histrionic, she'll definitely take pictures and send them to people for attention. As fucked up as that sounds. She'd see within a day or two.
And anyway I've lived this long. Might as well take some pride in the last thing I'll do.
>>29577960
same, but I'm 18 and it started when I was about 9
>>29581670
That makes you a pedophile
>>29577819
Ill one up you. ve tried it countless times. First time, i was in the bath and was holding a toster, the problem, i never turned it on, just kinda dropped it. After doing that i kinda just walked away. Second time, tried stabbing myself in the abdomen with a knife, a steak knife. In hindesight wouldve hurt like a bitch. Third time, my moms boyfriend left his car whie they took a trip to oregon or something so i put a hose from the exhaust to the window and let it run. Im not sure why nothing happned but the car was outside, so maybe thats why. He also left his guns and i would just sit there with it in my hands contemplating, but ultimatly never pulled it. The last time was about a year ago (24 now) and i tried the cpap mask thing but it was too small. I also wrapped a belt around my doorknob and just kinda sat at the foot of my door waiting tell i passed out so that my body would go limp and the belt would choke me, it worked for a second, i was feeling the lightheadness feeling, but i pussied out. Oh i also tried to dehydrate myself. that one is hell. After that i got a job, quit coming to 4chan and started smoking lots of pot, (side not, pot doesnt help make thing better) and life started getting a little better. I lost my job, but am in the works of gettint another one. Im obviously back on 4chan because i dont work and need something to pass the time... Idk, im ok with dying, but i dont think im capable of taking my own life.
>>29581711
What? How does that make me a pedophile?
>>29581759
I should also mention i started trying around the age of 14 or 15. Its hard to remeber.
>>29577851
>If she were dead I would have done it years ago.
The amount of times I've said this sentence holy fuck I'm actually crying a little bit.
>>29577819
I nearly killed myself a few weeks ago
Overdosed on a truckload of pills, ended up puking them all up though, luckily it was early enough to not leave any damage
If I had taken the other pills among the two sorts there were in the cabinet I would have had a heart attack and died, really wonder if it's for better or worse that I picked wrong
>>29581779
Are you a female? I like to think I have a good eye for this stuff, just wanting confirmation.
Exhaust didn't work because of emissions standards applied to cars now, stab to the stomach is dumb, we've all tried to doorknob thing and we've all bitched out (so don't get down about it) the toaster didn't have to be on.
Electocution in a tub is impossible unless your house is a relic that's somehow escaped inspection. Ground fault circuit interruptors put an end to that.
>>29579254
>the human mind is magnitudes less so........your mind, maybe
Fucking casuals. The quickest, least painful, effective way of killing yourself is with a shotgun to the head.
All you have to do is put the barrel in your mouth, angled up so that if the barrel were to continue, it would touch around your hair whorl.
Pro-tip:12 gauge slugs are best.
>>29581795
If not for my nieces.
This isn't fair. It's torture. My therapist says he's glad I have something to live for, he doesn't get it. It's not that I want to live for them, it's that I want them to live well without me.
>>29581865
Sorry to dissapoint, but im a dude. And yeah, i was young when i tried most of those. I didnt really know any better, just kinda did it without thinking or doing any research. Saw it in a movie, saw it worked for them, why not right?
>>29579955
Hello Mr. Samsa
>>29581925
Gotta do your homework.
Even if the goal is death.
Especially if the goal is death. There aren't many things you'll regret botching quite like a suicide attempt. Think you want to die now? You just sit tight, there's more.
I've decided on hanging. I'd slit my wrists in a bathtub after linking my ex 'red water' by rehab in a text, but she's blocked my number and I have a complex about veins.
Hanging is a good way to say "hey world. You beat me, but I didn't go out like a bitch."
>>29577819
if I was still keeping count I wouldn't be here
>>29582001
>Hey world. You beat me, but I didn't go out like a bitch.
This will be my suicide note.
My entire suicide note.
>>29577919
I've never saw megaman to be disturbing until today....
I Think about it at least 3 times a day, I'd say. Not close to the point of doing it though, it's mostly just a comforting thought.
A while back almost everyday because >tfw kissless virgin with no hope of improving
But then I got a gf and i'm not a kissless virgin anymore, but I discovered I have erectile dysfunction WITH 21 FUCKING YEARS OLD and the suicidal thoughts are way more serious and stronger than before, i'm hopeless.
Nearly every day for the past ten years. I kind of do realize that life can be absolutely amazing and have had moments of pure bliss that seemingly made all the suffering I go through worth it. Really my life went to shit once I had surgery on my nose that fucked up my breathing, making it feel like I was suffocating most of the time. I've had surgery to kind of fix it but it's still bad. Fucking Jews, really as all the doctors I've had were Jews. You guy should read Power of Now, though I feel it would be a lot more helpful to others. It's helped me, but being chronically disabled fucking sucks and it's hard to accept that this is my reality. That's the secret, though. Letting go, stopping resistance to what is. The world is absolutely insane, we've all seen enough evidence to believe in this notion. It could be great, though. Maybe I'll get there as well some day but I seriously doubt I'll die a natural death.
Every day.
Only reason I don't do it is because I'm too afraid of it hurting, or that I could mess up and end up even worse.
ITT we write our suicide notes so we don't look like we go out like a bitch.>>29582001
>>29582058
Fapping helps. Eating kind of helps if you can keep from overdoing it. Music helps.
>>29577819
I have a few times however if done improperly I could slowly choke to death I want it done on the first go as cleanly as possible
>>29577819
every day of my life for the past ten years.
>>29582107
Megaman doesn't have to be disturbing. Just that timeline is.
Also:
>Tripfag
get out.
>>29583016
I ship Samus and Rock, man.
>>29577819
six weeks ago i was walked home from work because the bus wasn't coming. i had to walk across the entire city, and the sun was really bright. i live in a heavily industrial area. there's some large power lines on one of the streets near my house. i dropped the groceries i was carrying and climbed one, not really thinking about it. i knew that the lines carry tenfold the amp value to kill someone, so my plan was to hold onto one of the metal pegs and ground myself so the current would pass straight through me. i reached out to grab one of the lines when i felt a snag, my backpack strap had caught on another peg thing. then i got really scared and climbed down. on the way home i saw a sparrow attacking a raven. pretty cool.
haven't thought about it until now.
I actually bought a helium tank, but my mother discovered it and sent me to a nuthouse. My experience there was honestly worse than anything else in my life. They really treat you like an animal there.
Every day for the past 4+ years. I fake being a normal, emotionally stable guy, so other than two people no one really knows. If there was a way to do it without hurting the people close to me I would.
I think about it sometimes
but I can't do it to my parents, they gave me the best childhood I could have wished for
I can't do it to them
I've thought about it, but if I ever decide on actually doing it, it wouldn't be by hanging or shooting or cyanide or anything like that
I'd probably just go outside and literally do what the fuck I want until something or someone kills me
>>29577819
Every now and then when I'm driving in my car I take a moment to consider how easily I could just steer into something really quick. Not a nice way to go and I could easily just end up injured but that's as much as it ever occurs to me.
>>29585068
Fuck you. You have nothing to complain about then. You dont even deserve to die faggot.
>>29577819
Every day, thinking about it is the only thing that gives me relief.
>>29577851
Don't even need to post, you basically said everything i would of said.
>>29577819
Here you go, family.
Visit cripplechan specific board for more info.
>>29577819
Every day for the past 3 years or so until recently.
Used to overdose once every few months just to get out the house.
I realized I need to stop giving a fuck about what other people think of me.
Someone, Somewhere will love me for who I am and want to spend their life with me, even If I am a degenerate NEET tranny.
I'm pretty optimistic these days desu
>>29577819
Every day. It's strangely comforting.
>>29586052
thats more a way to get into prison.
Most days. I have a book and record the date of which every day I seriously consider it
>>29577819
Most of my waking moments I've considered it, ever since I was a little boy. I don't do it for similar reasons that >>29577851 gave.
>>29579849
that's honestly just the body's natural response to the abberation you are
if you refuse to change, your body will do it for you.
>>29580669
same, except i was a pussy faggot who OD'd and was sent to a juvi psych ward
I will never go back to the psych ward holy shit those places are a fucking nightmare, when I go for it next time it has to be a permanent solution like bullets or a noose
>>29587414
That's spooky as fuck. The worst is that I don't think that would motivate me enough to do it. I live in a pretty conservative country from latinamerica, if I transitioned I would be excluded from society forever.
>>29582385
>Care not for me now for you'll soon forget. Live good lives, or don't. I go forth to this endless night not with fear, but with both a desire for sleep and a thirst for what may come next. Let's fucking go, Thanatos.
>>29587474
no it's not, logic is very simple here
benis=man
vagoo=woman
intersex= like .02% of humans, don't kid yourself.
just because you think you're a glass of juice doesn't make you a glass of juice
>>29580569
oooo can i see your craftsmanship?
>>29587539
Intersex individuals are like 1,5% of the population m8, and it comes in various degrees.
Also.
>he doesn't know about the neuroanatomical studies
Your logic is flawed.
>>29587586
your cellular makeup disagrees with you
you are mentally ill
i'm not saying this as a bad thing, i'm telling you the root of the problem.
seek mental help, not surgery or chemicals that mutilate your body.
>>29587622
>get mental help
>they tell me that I should start hormone therapy
>>29587682
time to try meditation and philosophy and not trust the juden scourge who contributed to your condition in the first place.
>yes get on hormones, take the pills goy, you're not delusional at all we've certainly always had so many people with these conditions for centuries not a decade
you're not a schizo you just want to cut your dick off.
We call people who do that eunuchs. That mentality can be changed.
I regularly daydream about it.
>>29587740
>this /pol/-tier gibberish
I wondered how much it would take for you to show your real face.
Go back to your containment board.
>>29587774
>implying
the doctor who first performed the surgery, which was highly unethical if you actually look in to the case, has come out against it as well as the top doc at John Hopkins where it was done, yet health boards full of a certain group of people dismiss their field expertise.
truth isn't nice to your feelings faggot, and having a bogeyman you don't research is the exemplification of ignorance.
Know thy enemy and know thyself, and in your case that has a double meaning
>>29587774
>>29587827
in addendum, of all people here itt you should kill yourself because when faced with the possibility that the root of your problems stems from a delusion that can be changed through effort and willpower and not say, the belief that you are the 23rd trislekor fleet commander trapped on earth or that every time you see a bridge you want to jump off for no reason other than to see what what it's like, in other words, you have a problem that you can fix on your own, sends you into bouts of
>muh /pol/
>muh racist/sexist/whatever fucking label you want to use
so yeah, you should just end it faggot, some of us are tying nooses for no particular reason and we can't stop.
>>29577969
>Best way is NO2
>Second best way is Helium
>Third best way is doing ton of drugs on the edge of a roof of a realy tall building
>>29587827
It's funny how you bring up the "truth isn't nice to your feelings" part considering that you haven't make a comment about the neuroanatomical evidence supporting transgenderism, but that's ok, i don't expect /pol/lys to be good at confronting reality.
Oh, and I don't know if you haven't read about it, but the technique and technology used to perform the SRS has decreased the amount of deaths during the operation drastically, making it pretty safe for today standards.
Oh, and btw I wouldn't expect you to know the difference between the case you seem to be quoting (David Reimer I presume) and performing a SRS in someone who actually has been evaluated by a shrink. Because of course, you will also deny the decrease in suicide attempts that trans people has after a successful transition, because that doesn't fits your narrowed narrative.
You know what? go fuck yourself. You're just another "redpilled" /pol/lack who doesn't know jackshit about what he's talking about, but since you can assure your own identity by your own means you need to create this fantasy world in which trans people don't have a space, even with all the scientific evidence proving the contrary.
You're, ironically, a cuck, and you will continue to be until the day you die. Don't trust me? Go read some Nietzsche, I'm sure knowing that Hitler sucked his syphilic cock would be enough motivation to get you reading it.
>>29588001
>NO2
**N2O**** DO NOT use NO2 lel
>>29588035
all i'm saying is you can fix your own problems you literally delusional faggot and then you go and make all this salt
I've brought to the table only what you've brought as well, don't try to gain some high ground
Freddy would declare you an untermensch and fun fact the gay science isn't actually about being a faggot.
>>29588035
hey here's a thought you've done so much research on tranny stuff why haven't you realized that you're going to kill yourself anyways?
just do it now, quit waiting.
>>29588156
>>29588176
>get BTFO
>"I-I was just trying to be nice, y-you f-fucking faggot"
>"b-better kill yourself"
If there's a thing I enjoy is getting /pol/fags to choke on their own bullshit.
Have a nice day, fellow untermensch.
>>29588300
if i ever came off as nice that was your misinterpretation i was always giving you two very easy solutions you delusional faggot
>>29588300
>"b-better kill yourself"
YOU'RE LITERALLY IN A THREAD ABOUT KILLING YOURSELF SPOUTING YOUR WOE IS ME TRANNY BULLSHIT
FUCK YOU
>>29577819
The only time I think about suicide is when I have a specific fantasy of doing it and leaving a scathing note that chastises a bunch of people who would pretend to be sad that I died and use it as a way to get free attention coins for themselves. I would like to write a suicide letter that explains who is allowed at my funeral as well as who was never a true friend to me
>>29577851
this, nothing more to add
>>29588468
That's the reason I don't commit suicide; every time I'm close to doing it, I think of all the stupid fucking shit that tangential people in my life would post on fucking facebook about how I was "omg the nicest person ever :'( i'm so sad he is gone" even though that person hates me now and doesn't talk to me ever and my death doesn't affect their life in any way whatsoever. Just thinking of all the blatant attention seeking and faggot behavior I would enable with my suicide is enough to put me off from it. I can't stand the thought of random Stacys i know posting retarded shit about me, me being dead and having no way to tell her she is a retarded slut.
>>29577851
I feel the same
fucking hivemind I swear
Daily.
Had a friend who was like this last april. Best friend and only friend in the world.
>we were going to chill on sunday and monday
>terrific sunday, was great
>come by his house next day
>see him lying in bed and parents crying
>he hung himself that evening with a belt
>just sit by his bed and stare, felt a huge gaping hole
>absolutely silent at his funeral
>pictures shown of him laughing, some were with me in the picture aswell
>can't help but bawl my eyes out
>feel alone in this world constantly
Whenever i see a belt i just get shaky and wonder, what if i followed him
I miss you R. I miss you so fucking much. Whyd you have to leave me here alone? What do i do now? Im scared
>>29588808
fuck man
this is why I'm not doing it
my mom is one thing, but she has my dad, she'll manage
but my best friend, i know it would fuck him up
>>29589190
Yeah that's why i haven't followed him into death yet. He has a brother which i kinda consider a friend. And i don't think he'd be able to bare two people that walked those floors constantly to be gone.
I'm glad he found peace though, i don't blame him nor am i angry. Just confused and sad. This was april 3 so it's really fresh aswell. Why couldn't things have gone differently? I somehow feel like i might have saved him that day if i didn't leave so early. I feel guilty
>>29577819
At least twice a day, every day, for the past 3 years
