You should probably try psychiatric drugs, robros.
The worst feeling in the world is finally trying them at 32 and realizing you wasted your life and could have actually done things.
>>29527430
i tried them and it felt like my brain was being zapped when i moved my eyes
also it felt like it induced a constant depression, which was confusing
>>29527430
What kind, antipsychotics? I don't want to end up with fucking tardive dyskenesia or some shit. That is nightmarish. I would rather be healthy and strong than a functional member of society.
>>29527430
They're all terrible except for stimulants and GABAergics, but those are nearly impossible to get and cause rapid tolerance and dependence.
>>29527470
God Tier: Ritalin, Adderall, Dexedrine
Best Tier: Wellbutrin, Mirtazapine, other atypical antidepressants
Meh Tier: SSRIs
Shit Tier: MAOIs, tricyclics, antipsychotics
>>29527430
I'm 25, have I wasted my life yet?
>>29527518
You're at the first freakout point. Don't ignore it.
>>29527510
I'm on Wellbutrin and all it did was jolt me out of a depression and make me feel manic for a few weeks, and I've been in a banal stability for several months since.
>>29527531
At what point is my life irredeemable?
>>29527574
Well, 18, probably, because life is all about inertia and you inevitably become more rigid and time passes more quickly as you age.
Youth is a horrible, beautiful trick because you really do feel immortal and that the old fogeys are a different lifeform. I don't know if it's prettier that people just squander and live as Gods or not. Life is for the young.
>>29527510
>Meh tier: SSRIs
You've got that right. Got prescribed Zoloft while I was in the Navy following back-to-back deployments and it didn't do shit. Now that I'm out, I'm looking high and low for psychedelics so that I can rebuild my mind.
The nightmares don't stop, robots. They just get sneakier until the vividity becomes horrifying on a level that can't even be put into words.
>>29527430
>Prozac
Made me pace constantly, general weird feelings, quit taking it before therapeutic effects, if they even exist, had a chance to kick in.
>haldol
Made me loopy as fuck, did not clear my thoughts, then again they say that takes a few days and by then my thoughts were clearing; did get me to sleep for the first time in several days; caused dystonia, where my entire body would wrench in contorted positions, which was uncomfortable.
>abilify
Some bullshit, at a high dose made me so robotic and "dead inside" that I was seriously contemplating suicide for the first time, also relentless akathisia, i.e. restlessness and pacing, which made it extremely difficult to sleep, as you can imagine, and sleep is the most important thing for recovering from "manic psychosis"; also costs like 1500$ a month if you don't have the right insurance
>risperdal
Actually not bad as an antipsychotic, did make me feel a bit flat, which is what antipsychotics do, after all, and made me gain a bit of weight, but much more tolerable than haldol or abilify; maybe it's worse at higher doses though, I was only on 1mg/day and only for a couple of months.
>Lithium
god-tier drug, works as advertised, literally feel like I'm on no drug at all, I just haven't had a serious psychotic or depressive episode since starting it. Most people don't know I'm on it, the few who do say I act the same as I did before. Does require regular blood-tests because it can easily build to a toxic level (very very narrow therapeutic range) but that is not a very grave inconvenience compared to being in a psych ward for days or weeks at a time every couple of years. Only side effect I've gotten is increased urination, which went away, but I am still more liable to piss myself if I drink excessively and go to bed too early, but that happened sometimes even before lithium; also pretty noticeable hand tremors sometimes, to the point that strangers comment on it at work. Overall, though, has my recommendation.
Dexedrine and Xanax is a fantastic combination, unfortunately I couldn't keep things in check and started doing a lot of methamphetamine and went to rehab lol. Just don't do gay drugs (SSRI/antipsychotics/stuff that doesn't get you high?)
>>29527510
let me fix that real quick
>god tier: amphetamine, methylphenidate
>best tier: benzos, z-drugs, gabapentinoids, barbiturates, modafinil,
>meh tier: antidepressants with dopaminergic effects, bupropion, sertraline, tranylcypromine, phenelzine, selegeiline, NaSSas
>bad tier: SSRI's, SNRI's, rMAO-Ai's, partial agonist antipsychotics, limotrigine, lithium
>what the fuck are you doing tier: full antagonist antipsychotics
I'm glad they work for you but I've had horrible experiences with mostly all of them:
* Prozac seemed to work the first time I was prescribed it and made the mistake of tapering off because I wasn't depressed any more. Next time I was put on this it just made me tired all the time (Not sure what magic dose doctor had me on)
* Lexapro made me nauseous and just honestly not right. It felt like I was mentally unstable and disassociation which scared me enough to stop taking it.
* Ruboxitine was prettii alright but it feels like you never sleep on it ... ever. Strangely enough you're not really tired but I feel like you're not actually getting the sleep you need. It's a weird drug and I'd probably stay on this if it weren't for the fact that it causes severe constipation.
* Ritalin gave me chest pain and stopped working virtually after the first week. It would still work if I increased the dose but I crashed almost straight away and after a certain point it wasn't sustainable.
It seems like there really are drugs that help but so far the only ones I've found have horrible side effects. I've been making some horrible decisions lately and I'm currently quite depressed. Are there any other drugs I should look into?
I've had bad experiences with doctors and psychs just panhandling my money and never felt like any of them had any care for my my best interests or even what I was saying. Because of this I would only ever bother going to one if I can just request specifically exactly what I want - a benzo, an opiate, a stimulant, or maybe gabapentin or wellbutrinm dont even want to bother with anything less. But apparently asking for something specific is "doctor shopping" that will get you flagged on some database. I really do need something to function though that's why I've turned to grey market shit and RCs. Kratom is pretty good for motivation although hard on the body. Pheynlpiracetam is okay, tianeptine is pretty good but addictive. Looking into modafinil now and maybe some RC stims. Once you reach a certain low point drugs really are probably the only answer if you ever want some stepping stool to even have a shot at breaking out of the bad habits and inertia.
>>29527470
You don't want to be taking antipsychotics all the time unless you're legitimately schizophrenic, and even then most schizos go off their meds regularly, and for good reasons.
Most of them have somewhat sedating properties, not like a benzo more like benadryl. Most of them can cause weight-gain, tremors, and akathisia. But the worst part of all, way worse than anything you can fit into a drug insert, is the subjective experience of what is aptly called the "chemical straight-jacket". On a high enough dose, even on a fairly low dose, you lose most of your emotions and most of the imaginative and creative parts of your psyche are dead as dead can be. It's a lot like being an android. People who experience "psychoses" know better than anyone that psychosis sucks. And they STILL have very low compliance with this class of medication. That would tell psychiatrists something if psychiatrists were something else, but they're not so it doesn't. They make your behavior and speech less disconcerting to family/the public, so people think they're miracle drugs. Nobody cares about the internal world of the patient and how disruptive these drugs are.
I think it should be necessary for licensure in psychiatry to take an antipsychotic for a two week period, so they have some capacity to empathize with their psychotic patients. But I'm not going to hold my breath.
>>29527502
Stimulants are nonsense imho, they're as deluding as malt liquor, just in a different way.
>>29527952
I've tried a bunch of OTC stuff as well.
Phenylpiracetam would be GOAT if the tolerance wasn't instantaneous. Feels a lot like a stimulant.
Adrafinil is a cheap prodrug of modafinil and supposedly the same effect in the body. I've used it and it doesn't do much for me except keep me awake.
I think theanine+caffeine (or just iced tea), L-DOPA, and 5-HTP are my favorites. Also the NOW Foods thyroid booster I took felt amazing for a couple of days, but then I faded to baseline.
>>29528012
>>29527819
Good info. Thanks.
>>29527845
Goddammit. Now I don't want to take them again...
Fuck putting yourself on the pill merry-go-round.
There's got to be a better solution than playing roulette with your brain.
>>29527430
>tfw rebound from ritalin makes me depressed
>need to take ritalin to get shit done
JUST
>>29527430
Next month I'm going to see a psych
90 minute session
Not in2 that, kinda just want to get my drugs and get out all brief-like, but I guess they need to make diagnoses and such
Definitely going to advertise myself as being less crazy than I am
Hopefully I'll get something other than SSRIs because last time I was on them they made me feel completely nuts
>>29528271
Yeah this is why I haven't taken any more drugs. My life is bad enough without fucking with the entire way that my brain works and even though I'm depressed, tired, anxious, etc, I feel like I still have some control over my life
>>29528402
some tips:
don't outright say you have any specific disorder, don't admit to knowing anything, describe symptoms and lead the shrink on to the conclusion you want them to get to.
Make sure to keep a good poker face when you get them to say what you want them to say, don't smile when they offer what you want, don't act repulsed when they try to give you garbage.
when they do give you garbage, take it graciously. next appointment say it made things worse or that it isn't helping. research common adverse effects and claim you have them
I'm on them. They don't help much.
>>29527502
I've been on gabapentin for like 3 months. I started on it as an anti-seizure drug for benzodiazepine withdrawal, and I was kept on it as a mood stabilizer. 2400 milligrams a day nigguh. It also complements Wellbutrin pretty well. I'm on a high dose of that, and I've never once felt tweaked out in the way I've heard some people complain about it.
>>29528624
yea I love gabapentin
I didn't use it as instructed though, I'm a student and couldn't afford to have the 'morontin' effects all the time
I just used a slightly higher dose then prescribed on a less frequent basis.
anytime I did something that I knew would cause anxiety, or I just felt like not dealing with reality, I'd take like 900-1200 mg and get that nice delirium
>>29527430
>anti-psychotics
>try to kill myself
>anti-depressants
>stop caring about anything
>sedatives
>stop eating, drinking and sleeping
>>29528709
It doesn't give me brain fog or anything. I don't really feel anything from it. I'd probably need to eat like 3 grams of it if I wanted to catch a buzz.
>>29528722
Onee-san! Come back! You actually got dubs!
>>29528779
oh shit nigga I sure did
first time I ever really did anything with my life
>Try Adderall
>Actually feel motivated to do something besides half pay attention to TV
>Actually want to socialize
>My mind isn't a jumbled mess and I can articulate my thoughts
>Crash
>Feel like shit
Whelp it was nice while it lasted but I don't think it's something I'd want to be prescribed and take on the daily.Plus that stuff can't be good for your brain
>>29528776
that's a shame
I always got a great effect from it, maybe even a little better than benzos in my experience
the tolerance to it is a bitch though
>>29528012
>Chemical straight jacket
Damn that really hits the nail on the head.
My mom's on a drug cocktail for schizophrenia and she's nothing but a former shell of herself that sleeps 3/4 of the day. When shes not on them shes motivated but delusional so all of her effort goes into something crazy like trying to get Obama to come save our county
I really hope things advanced far enough some day to truly help these people, they don't deserve the hell they live in :(
>>29528099
Can confirm, me on methylphenidate
>>29528012
Could it be that you're just used to feeling like a crazy person and what you describe as "being an android" is just "normal" for everyone else?
I worked with a kid with severe ADHD who had recently started taking some kind of meds, no idea which. He wouldn't take them unless he was forced to. When he didn't, he talked about how great he felt...as he said bizarre random shit and literally tried to climb the wall.
>>29529823
Not who you replied to, but what kind of bizarre random stuff was he saying?
Because sometimes with ADHD I feel like docs are trying to fix what isn't really broken
>>29529936
I know people like to shit on ADHD diagnosis but this dude truly had it, if not something else on top of that. I mean he could not do anything calm for more than a few seconds without losing his shit.
I remember on one occasion where he was unmedicated he said shit like
>"I wonder if I could pull out a cop's gun and shoot him before he could react"
>put a chair on his back and said it was a jet pack/sniper rifle/"lifting weights"
>"I've had medicine every day since I was born"
of course none of that had anything to do with whatever I was talking about, and while he was saying it he was rolling on the floor, throwing shit randomly, climbing on lockers.
>>29530058
Ok ok it does sound like he needs it haha, how old is he?
When I was young I was sorta like that but not that extreme, they wanted to put me on meds but my parents said no and I just happened to chill out as I got older. I'm still sort of scatter brained though but I always did well in school
