Who's genuinely suicidal here? Fuck off with your memes. Why are you thinking about killing yourself?
>>29508925
I don't see any way forward after college other than a dead-end retail/manual labor job, and that sounds exhausting. Plus I haven't had any friends since I was 16, and you can only be alone with your thoughts for so long before you start to go nuts.
>>29508925
I wake up everyday knowing I won't enjoy myself, then I have nothing but the next day waiting for me where I'll hate it just as much.
> do stuff you enjoy
Fuck you I don't enjoy anything, I'm ill and incapable alright?
>Why are you thinking about killing yourself?
Typical hopelessness, no future, no friends, no family, no relationships AT ALL. Anxiety, shame, guilt and depression ruined my life and there's no reason for anyone to give me a break or a chance.
I wish it didn't have to be this way.
I feel trapped in a loop.
I keep falling in love with celebrities or fictional characters. People I could literally never be with I feel a burning passion for. It just doesn't make sense. My mind has bee doing this for my entire life. 2nd through 4th grade I told everyone I knew that the girl from Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends was my girlfriend. I've always been like this. I don't know why, and at some point it just hurts. It hurts a lot. It's not even close to the realm of normie "will this girl like me back if I ask her out". I can't ask them out. I cant stop falling in love like this, and it makes me hurt all over.
>>29508925
>Why are you thinking about killing yourself?
Because of probably never having a gf desu.
I'm completely hopeless OP, everything ive gone out of my way to experience to try to make life better has only effectively reinforced my pessimism.
i have no future and wasted my youth
every day i see the disappojntment in my parents when they ask how the job search is going and i say "fine", for the past year
i can never achieve anything i just want to die in my sleep
I have an incredibly tiny penis. I've been rejected twice because of it, and have heard multiple women gossip about other men's tiny penises. I cannot deny my desire for sex and relationships, but I also cannot forget about these things as society constantly reminds me that everyone around me is having sex and that I should be doing it too.
Because of this, I have no reason to fight. I cannot deal with a full time job that I don't care about if I'm just going to be alone at the end of the day. I can't even have friends because people are constantly talking of sex and sharing their sexual experiences; not only am I left out of these conversations, but as soon as people realize you're a virgin, they'll ostracize you.
I am doomed to be alone. I have no place in society and so can't bother to contribute to it. I will never fulfill my primal desire for meaningful human relationships. Therefore, I have to kill myself.
>>29508925
Because I'm getting tried.
>>29509159
*tired.
Can't even spell correctly
I have a hard time justifying continued existence. I cling to curiosity and the fact that I can still get high, but the world in it's current state and really every state it's ever been or could/will be just make everything seem pointless. The suffering will always overwhelm everything.
I started to feel trapped, didn't know how I was going to pay my bills, and then breaking my ribs, falling from a latter, getting shingles, and then breaking my knee cap, dragged me down further. I was already taking antidepressants but coupled with the pain, and the prescription pain meds I felt hopeless. I actually tried to kill my self, I found a hill and sat and looked at the sunset and pulled out my gun. For some reason my gun double fed and jammed.
Not enough resources to fix my life. From a shit country where even if I fixed my life, it would still be shit. Too old to reboot my life completely and even if I did, not enough resources to fix it. And so on, in a loop. It's only getting worse and I don't really have anything to wait for anymore.
Being alone with your own thoughts makes you lose it a little, and being the talentless nobody that i am, nobody will notice or love me and i genuinely feel like i am going to never feel intimate with someone. after highschool everything became boring and pointless
because ive been a quitter all my life and I ain't gonna stop now.
I can't come up with reasons not to. I'm tired. I have no ambitions or goals, and even several years of trial and error didn't lead me to anything I truly cared about field-wise. I don't like gambling games and any scenario which effectively functions as one today. I really hate myself, more than I could hate anything else. Now someone could say "haha, find love then" but there are two reasons why that isn't a valid reason. The first is that I had that, and I hate myself entirely because I fucked up and let go, then hesitated for so long that it was permanently lost. In this case, it's become completely impossible to salvage, it's impossible to be with that same person. So I'm forced to move on. Yet love itself shouldn't be the reason why you want to live. You should already want to live, not depend on someone else's company. So if I don't already want to live, exactly why am I still here?
>spend majority of life alone and depressed
>get really bad the early part of this year
>suddenly meet cute girl
>get a second job
>getting a new apartment soon
>recognize I should feel better, this is what I wanted
>still feel depressed and like killing myself every waking moment
>feel hopeless and in the wrong place all the time
>still can't sleep for more than two hours at a time
>still stupid and lazy
What am I to do, guys?
>>29508925
I don't see the point in living. I just don't get what gives people an inherent will to live. My life is utter boredom. I'm a uni student and I really am not learning anything useful. I'm learning how to make a comfortable living in a few years but that's about it. I've thought about joining the French Foreign Legion but I've been sad, not quite depressed but more just perpetually bummed out for the past few months and its got me thinking that maybe I'm not fit for military stuff (which is what I've always wanted to do by the way). That makes me want to end it because then there's no reason. I don't want to live a boring life but I fear I'm not cut out for a fast paced life.
this thread is quite sad desu
I hate my body
I hate that I have no friends
I hate that I can't make friends
I hate that I can't socialize
I hate that I wasted my childhood
I hate that I wasted every opportunity I got
I hate that I let my health fail
I hate that I'm so lazy
I hate that my social anxiety is so bad I can't even talk to my own parents(only people I can talk to normally are my brothers)
I hate that I'm always tired
I hate that I've got no future
I hate that I can't change no matter how hard I try
I hate how useless I am
I hate that I never went to school and had a normal upbringing
I hate that I'm uneducated because my parents entrusted me to learn things on my own(isn't this fucking retarded?)
I think all my problems stems from the fact I never had social contact as a kid, and it's not even my fault my parents made that choice for me, I feel like my only option now is suicide
>>29509485
Why not at least give it a shot? If you fuck up, at least you tried.
My life is basically empty. I outlived both my parents, my little brother, the girl I loved, and our child. I don't even know why I'm still alive. I hate everything, I'm always miserable. I don't know why I don't just die.
I'm an hikikomori with several health problem (ibs, back pain, scoliosis, cervical arthritis...
How can i return to the society with all of this problem, in a country where welfare is actually a nightmare and when you are poor? Plus i dropped out at the secondary school a while ago.
I wasted my life, i know it, so at this point i have already setted the day of my suicide in a date that have a meaning for me. I wish guns were free like in the USA, but it's not. Most likely i will jump from the roof
My therapist chewed me out for dropping summer school and weight watchers. Those are literally the only responsibilities that I have and I couldn't handle them. Anyway, apparently I stink and I've been stinking for a while. I didn't notice but he did. He said that I shouldn't bother coming back next week if I didn't wash up. He said my excess weight and terrible hygiene is a sign that I'm not trying to get better. It's true. I didn't even try weight watchers and I ignored his suggestions to wash my clothes and clean my room. He said he cared more about me than I do myself. Asked why I even came in anymore since he didn't feel that he was helping me. I couldn't answer. Started crying and walked out. I just wanna die man. I can't handle this shit anymore. Life isn't even that difficult and I already can't manage. I want to die but I'm too scared to kill myself. How pathetic.
99% of the people who are suicidal will never have the balls to go through with it
neither will 99% of you :>
>>29509737
Are you trying to make me feel even worse?
I feel like I have no choice but to kill myself but you're right I can't do it
I'm not sure what to do though except suffer
>>29508977
This, I've been feeling my sense of humour drain more and more and I just feel like nothing is gonna be fun anymore eventually.
>>29509396
You got a therapist? Might be good to bring this stuff up.
>>29509823
get the fuck over yourself
i broke my neck and am paralyzed from the chest down and im not even a whining bitch like you mate
>>29509899
>"I broke my neck"
> your own fault there m80
I joined a shitty fraternity that was full of shut in losers like me. Found out a week ago they just talk shit about me and how pathetic I am. My best friend (who I have now blocked out) just narcissistically always one upped me whenever I talked about how good my life was now going and subtly made fun of me to my face about my life.
I dropped out and work for my families business. They pay me minimum wage. I barely have any time to do my school work to get a degree I want. Everyone has said they don't take me seriously, including my parents who just roll their eyes when I talk about my dreams and aspirations.
I'm 24 years old and a KHV. I don't mind it, I just hate the fact I'm starting to realize just how lonely I really am and how very few people actually care about me, all of which are not even close to hang out with.
>>29509737
You're right, under ordinary circumstances I can't. But I realized that I'm less rational shortly after waking up, far more emotional at that. So if I drink right after waking up, and get drunk quickly enough without wanting to sleep again, I figure I'll be reckless enough to use the exit bag method. I need the equipment, then some alcohol and I think I can be reckless enough to do it regardless of how much of a coward I am usually.
It's really the only likelihood of me killing myself there is. So if I get the equipment and get drunk enough to be reckless, I could probably do it in the future. Will that happen? I dunno. Just the best odds of me pulling it off.
>>29509941
>KHV
That sucks. I have g warts, and it's depressing as hell. It's like being a KHV all over again.
Being suicidal is a meme
God damn I feel bad for you guys. I'll probably be posting the same stuff as you guys in a thread like this in a few years, but right now I just wish I could give all of you a hug
>>29509100
Except for this guy. A sex drive like this is what normies have. Just give up on it. Believe in the illusion of true love and never let go of it. By the time you'll realize you wasted your life looking for something that didn't exist, it will already be too late to kill yourself.
>>29509631
Stay strong brother. That's some harsh shit.
>>29509931
walking down the street, hit and run by a drunk from behind.
sure is my fault!
>>29508925
I'm a very broken human, I lack the skills to function in society or alone. I have absolutely no friends, my very visage is repulsive. I am a husk, it wouldnt be fair to even call myself a human.
I'm only still living currently because of my parents. I talked to them this morning and realized I would feel too guilty to do it to them just yet. My 3 siblings might be hurt over it but I don't really care that much for some reason.
I have some acid and whenever I run out of money or whatever, i'm gonna drop it and then kill myself.
>>29510889
Overdosing is painful and will most likely be thrown up by your body
>>29510938
I'm not planning on overdosing. I will drop acid because when I am tripping is one of the few times I actually have the bravery and willpower to go through with suicide. To actually die, I will jump in front of train.
>>29509505
Everything you listed is something you are directly responsible for and can change
>>29508925
because im a drug addict that lost his job/car/gf all in one week. time to die
>>29509728
then fix it you fucking mongoloid...
how are you supposed to take care of the more complex aspects of your life if you dont maintain the most personal? (hygeine)
heres what i need you to do. take ALL of your dirty shit down to the laundromat, clean/dry it, go home, clip your nails, brush the fuck out of your teeth, shower, shave your head with a 1 guard, shave your face completely, clean your room top to bottom no excuses, vacuum, mop/sweep, and get a solid 10 hours of sleep
>>29508925
I feel incredibly useless all the time. I spent the last few years staying in my room and fapping, because it's basically the only thing that still gives me any pleasure. Never had a gf, and I lived sheltered for most of my life. I have no motive to get a job, or anything for that matter, and even if I did I probably wouldn't be able to hold it for that long. I take antidepressants but they barely help. I just feel emotionally numb every day. Wouldn't be surprised if one of these days I decide to just OD on my prescriptions.
>>29511145
>OD
See >>29510938
The closest I've been to suicidal has been combination of ennui, loneliness and emptiness. Even then though I didn't really feel like killing myself.
I don't think I actually want to kill myself, but just a couple hours ago I was seriously contemplating quitting my job, breaking up with my gf, and quitting taking classes and just live like a NEET for as long as I can before I hit rock bottom and have to kill myself. This crosses my mind often when I don't take my meds for a few days.
>>29508925
I mean, I think about killing myself a lot, but then I'd miss the Singularity.
Anyone here with real, life ruined situations or is it really just "I don't want to put work in to my life enough so I'll just end it lol"
>>29511289
My life isn't entirely ruined yet, but i'm sliding downhill fast and I have nothing to hold on for. Nothing to motivate me. My absolute best case scenario is ending up with a job where I can afford to live alone without roommates.
Even that sounds only marginally more appealing than my current lifestyle. I have no will to live, so now that im falling I dont really care enough to put in the immense effort it would take to recover.
>>29511289
Me. I'd have no problem if my life sucked (it does). But I also have perpetual guilt for ruining someone else's life. That's something that I can't live with.
here, but Id rather be happy
>>29509396
Start taking pregnenolone and get your thyroid checked SRS.
I was until recently
Just felt like I'd ruined my life and that dying was the best option for all involved. Convinced myself that once the initial shockwave was over my family would get on better than normal.
Then I started taking antidepressants and now I only joke about suicide like I used to, feels better man.
Because I believe that the best thing about me is my looks.
Because I have no luck in relationships or school. The uni is really bothering me. I have such an anxiety that I'm stupid and won't pass the test that I can't function properly (maybe I didn't do well because of my depression, it's a circle). And if I will fail, I will go nuts, I'm already totally out of my mind. I feel stupid and unlovable.
>>29511289
How does a "ruined life" justify suicide any more than a boring / wasted life? That's just a sunk cost fallacy. You could just as easily tell someone like that to "put work into their life".
I think about it every other day
because I have no skills, no talent, no friends, no hope, no dad, no opportunities, no future, look like shit
I'm not normal, hate almost everything and everyone because what they like is either retarded and/or they're insane (see: http://megacycles-blog.tumblr.com/archive/)
really have nothing to live for, don't want to 'contribute' to society because it's fruitless
>>29511551
Normies believe that everyone can learn to enjoy living unless it is impossible due to jail or similar shit. It's the biggest lie there is.
I've smelled like shit for the last 10 years. Some sort of strange medical condition. It's very strong.ive got no friends or social life to speak of. Some family contact though. people know about me in the town I live. I park on the street and people are always making comment about my car and how it smells like shit. It's fucking bad man. I'm so empty. There's nowhere i can run to with this condition. All my friends moved on got married for good jobs. i work a shit labor job where I get treated like shit and given all the dirty work but i can't leave cuz no one else would hire me. My place smells horribly. I've given up being clean. I just drink and leave the cand everywhere. I don't know why I haven't ended it yet...
I was sexually and physically abused for most of my childhood.
I find it difficult to maintain relationships and daily functions of life.
I am a paranoid schizophrenic.
I am very terrified of dying, but it's the only thing I want anymore.
>>29511583
Wtfis that blog about and why do you keep trying to sell it
>>29511784
not mine, it's Bill's, the "thanks Lori" guy
it's interesting
"life is an unprofitable episode disturbing the blessed clam of nonexistence"
based arthur
absurdism is blatantly true
>>29508925
I trashed my house yesterday and I'm going to hang myself tomorrow. There will be a huge mess to clean up. Garbage everywhere. Fuck everything
>>29508925
a man broke me
ill always be a broken girl now
>walked in on my girlfriend (now ex) blowing in my apartment on my couch, then she calls the cops saying I assaulted her.
>likely going to jail soon since I don't do well in pressure situations and will look like I'm lying
>work at Subway as a 26 year old
>Have a ton of student debt and haven't paid a cent at all and it's been 7 years
>Average to below average penis
>tremor disorder that makes me incredibly socially anxious and unable to work most jobs effectively
>very low testosterone that adds to every issue
>fucked up family
>no sex drive anymore
>gyno, mouth breather, wide hips, veiny nut, unibrow, big head, narrow shoulders, freckles, pale skin, flat feet, the list goes on.......
>socially autistic because of all of this
>friends that I once had would just talk shit behind my back
So I'm at a pretty good spot to an hero right now. I feel as though I've done everything I've set out to in this life. What more could I ask for? I don't want kids or to get married. Don't want to grow old either. I've finally found a pretty clean and painless method and just knowing I have it planned makes me feel all warm and tingly inside.
<The bitch who ruined me. Kept reeling me back in whenever I'd leave. Then I finally did, and she ruined me.
>>29512883
*blowing a dude
My mind's pretty much taking me places that I feel like Elliot Rodger once reached. I don't want to become someone as angry at the world as he was, I'd rather commit suicide. Save all those guys that never look my way a favor.
>>29508925
I've now failed out of 5 different post secondary programs
My parents payed for half of that (I've pretty much payed them back by this point now)
I can't hold a job for longer than a few months because I get massive anxiety thinking that'll I'll be a lifer there if I stay any longer
I haven't had a friend since Grade 8 so almost 12 years now
I don't enjoy anything that I used to love anymore
Sports suck now
/sp/ has been garbage for years
Pretty much holding on to a slight hope that the Olympics will be good this year. If not, I gonna quit
>>29512964
Do you like Olympic basketball? I am going to follow the Olympic basketball team this year.
>>29512992
One of the few sports I don't really pay attention to once the Olympics start actually because USA just dominates non-stop
I'll pay attention if Canada can somehow beat out France in qualifiers
>graduating highschool is my only accomplishment
>have had to work since I was 16 to support myself and my siblings due to my dad dying and then my mom leaving me like a cruel, heartless fucker
>can't go to college because I have to use all my money for them
>can't help them out anymore than I already am
>i'm fucking tired of it all
>there's no hope for me at all at this point, i don't enjoy talking to anyone, people are just a pain in the ass to me at this point
>can only smile infront of my siblings, somewhat halfheartedly at this point
>my mother has left an extreme hatred of women in me
and yet I'm too much of a fucking pussy to end it all and am willing to keep on going for them
those two are the only lights in my life
>>29508925
Because I probably have irritable bowel, and the doctor says it's psychologicalthis is why I visit /r9k/, love you all robots
preventiveblox
