Stole some gum.
>>29457752
fk'd ur mum
When I was a kid I was sick and my mum made tea. I really hate that shit and I was struggling to drink it. By the end I couldn't take it anymore and I spat the tea back in the cup.
Then my brother walks by and says, "You're not going to finish that?" and he drank it all. I never told him that I spat it out.
Still lol at that memory
I also broke stuff and didn't get caught but that's not interesting
Skipped school. A lot. It really is a miracle that I was never caught, especially given the consequences if I had been.
ate my booger and almost got caught by my aunt
Let's see. I jerked it in the bathroom at school once, wasn't exceedingly horny or anything. On a whim.
A family member and I stole a bunch of gas on a road trip, I'm surprised we didn't get caught to this day even though there was a little tact involved.
I once flushed a slice of pizza down the toilet. I didn't want to finish it and didn't want to throw it out and get yelled at. So, for whatever reason, I figured that the best course of action would be "flush that shit down the toilet." Can't fucking figure out why now, though.
Of course, it didn't go down properly. I had to force it down the toilet by hand, then plunge like a madman for the next two hours.
Would have been one hell of an awkward explanation.
>>29457902
Can I have some?
Keke die Keke
>>29457752
I stole alcohol twice at the same store. The first time I did it they only had a handful of bottles with cap locks on and then the second time they did it all the bottles had locks. As soon as I got in my car taking the second bottle I took the hammer I had in the passenger seat and hit the bottom of the lock until it snapped off. I then got drunk off my ass off an entire bottle of Red Stag Jim Bean.
>drinking Jim Bean in the backyard
>WOW I drink an entire bottle and feel nothing weird
>listen to music sitting down
>music is so good I feel like standing up
>as soon as I get up I can feel it
>decide to go to my room to relax
>passout
>wake up
>go to bathroom because feeling sick
>begin to puke everywhere including on myself
>there is puke covering my tile floor and every time I stand up I slip in it
>I slip a total of five times and puke even more on myself when I slip
>I'm in so much pain from throwing up and slipping and falling
>Strip clothes off and walk to my room don't even clean up the vomit
>Go back to sleep
>Wake up to have 2 cops knocking on my bedroom door asking me if there are any drugs in my room as they flash their lights around my room and on me
>WTF
>Had the cops called on me by a family member and her nutjob religious friend
>They were apparently in the house the whole time and heard everything
>They thought I OD'd and had drugs in the house
Dumbest thing I did this week.
I beat the shit out of my younger sister, I was royally pissed off and had it with her bullshit and snapped. Punched her, yanked a shitload of her hair out and left her in tears.
Funny enough we're still close and she said she absolutely deserved it for being such a fucking bitch.
>>29457752
ran streaking naked to a school in the dead of night with a friend to seal our friendship
>>29458032
Bruh you are a fuckin alchy
>>29458192
I don't really drink bruh I keep it to a bottle every 2-3 weeks. I smoke a lot of pot though.
>>29458090
>TFW too beta to even slap a girl
How do you straight up beat 'em anon , how do you get the courage?
In highschool I was pretty /mischief/
I peed in some hand sanitizer during chemistry class
I even heard a girl say the sanitizer was weird later. lol
>>29457752
Went to a Spencers gift shop as a kid and stole a dog poop keychain. That would of been an embarrassing police report.
went to this house owned by an alcoholic single mother and her 3/4 daughters and new boyfriend and i went into their front yard around midnight and set their rubbish bin on fire and wheeled it into their expensive car and then the next day i get told apparently the bin burned like crazy and the fire spread and burned out their whole front yard and the eldest daughter had to break a window to get a hose or some shit because she locked everyone outside when they rushed out to see the fire.
i went passed a day or two later with my mum and it was legitimately burned out.
the only reason i didnt get in trouble was because this woman and her boyfriend had a history with the cops and the police saw me as young and innocent (just turned 17, lel) and the man and woman were apparently a bit fucked in the head and would tell lies to the cops all the time so that's how i got away with arson.
here's to hoping jewgle doesn't using this against me one day.
>>29459082
another story.
i was in this guys car one night with a few of my other friends and we were all drunk and might have been smoking a little meth (cant remember if we did that night) and the guy driving was speeding like 100km/h down side streets and 200km/h on main roads and we got to this newly built neighborhood and were going 100ks all around the place and we came up side by side next to this other guys car (he was alone) and the guy driving was trying to ram him off the road and two of my friends started hanging out the windows and ditching shit at his car. we were both going fast as fuck while this was happening, occupying both lanes on a narrow suburban street. eventually one of my mates lobs a tool (idk what it was) and it gets embedded into his windshield then the guy starts getting really fucking mad and going at us then our guy driving just manages to run him and we lost him down more streets. it was pretty fucked.
>>29459082
>>29459125
i also had a routine of vandalizing heaps of shit in my area a few nights out of the week. id always hit the same spots and try to hear reports of the damage. some of my antics got mentioned in the paper a few times, plus deeds done by other people i knew. it became so bad they had to fork out a shit ton of money for cctv cameras.
also i was the town/school shitter. id leave my steaming calling card around places. also super glue in the key hole was my calling card too.
Jacked off in highschool toilet stalls
>>29457752
i stole 7 packs of gum every saturday from the local convenience store
then i would give them out to kids in my middle school. people called me the gum man.
i never got caught and i did this every weekend at the same store for a year
I once hung out with high school friends and a massive douchbag who drove a mercedes.
The douchebag always bragged how rich his family was and basically saw us as dirty mutts he had pity with. On one occasion I filled a small flat bottle with milk and waited until he took us for a cruise on a saturday
When he took a piss at 2am I poured the milk into the openings of two air conditioners.
The funny thing is that you're not smelling it immediately but a few hours or even days later when you don't use it frequently.
At first he thougth someone shut shat their pants or something but the fucking stench wouldn't get away. He threatened to beat up anyone who was in his car but none of my friends said anything.
Breaking and enteringi'm not even black
