>TFW don't even know who I'm angry at or what I'm angry about anymore to the point that I'm not even angry, just sad and defeated
I thought angst was a stupid teenage meme that ended when you turned 18 and started accepting adult responsibilities. Now I have all the responsibilities, but deep down, I know I'll never be a real man. My life will just be some awkward, spaghettied approximation of real life and real feelings and real achievements won by men who never even consider that life could feel this cheap, worthless, and fragile.
How do you convince yourself that life is any more than the cosmic equivalent of tripping over banana peels until you drop dead? Is being a cocky, self-absorbed normie the only cure?
>>29455596
Don't let other people define what a life is.
Just be yourself, literally.
>>29455638
It fucking sucks. When I lived with my parent's still to save money, I never really felt like a real adult and avoided doing certain things (have friends over, try dating) because I didn't want to do them until I could stand on my own two feet with some dignity.
Now I live on my own, but I still feel like a fucking fake going through the motions. I'm compulsively private and self conscious about people seeing the habits and preferences I keep to when it's just me. It has a vicious side effect of making me chase really unstable girls whose over-the-top shit makes me feel alive or something.
I never fuck them, but end up listening to their shitty lives until they get bored and leave. It gives me some kind of weird energy I can't really explain. Maybe it distracts me or makes me feel better by comparison.
It feels like my coworkers are starting to get wise to my bullshit too and can tell that I'm just saying the right things at the right time. I feel like a zombie that's really good at resembling a real person at great effort. It's exhausting.
>>29455696
HOW CAN I BE MYSELF IF I DON'T KNOW WHO I AM?
