>make some of my living programming, autism housing/bux helps me make ends meet
>I get food/supplies delivered straight to my door
>haven't left my apartment in 7 weeks
>spend my free time watching countless hours of 90s/00s teen dramas and pretending I live their lives
>post about this on an /r9k/ thread, strikes me just how sad it is, decide to leave house
>not really sure what to do; I have no friends, I'm too nervous to see my dad even though I talk to him on the phone sometimes
>decide to go to Target
>walk around the store for a while, getting dirty looks so I leave
>go to Costco
>store is so boring that I want to kill myself
>try going to the park
>see some 15 year olds trying to set off rockets
>they're having trouble
>did this a lot as a teen, so I go up and offer to help
>they kind of look at each other and say sure
>after they launch it, they quickly pack up their stuff and leave; hear them laughing as they walk away
>see 2 bros playing frisbee
>ask if I can join
>they say "sure man"
>I can't really aim well
>they're cool about it, but after a few minutes I make up an excuse and leave
>walk into a club
>leave 1 minute later
>go to a Taco Bell
>eat some food and eavesdrop on teens
>their lives seem pretty exciting, in a low-key way
>go back home
I probably won't leave my apartment again anytime soon; really don't see what it has to offer our kind
>>29452365
I know that feel anon. You have to find what makes you feel satisfied. For me it is conceptualizing systems.
I really have to get out of this rut of fantasy and escapism. It isn't fulfilling,
This post makes me want to cry. God damn it. One day well be fine, one goddamn day :'(
Yeah, Id say try again cause there more suitable places/activities for robots and you just didn't know where to go...
...but I've been to those very places and I still felt out of place. I might not even be as autistic as you are. I actually leave the house for my burger job. So if I didn't find them enjoyable, you probably wouldn't either.
However, you never know unless you try.
>>29452365
Fuck man that hits home hard. Took mostly band classes in high school, had my own jazz ensemble that played at bars and shit. We were pretty damn good, so we all went on to college and got degrees in music theory. Now I'm 26 and living in a shitty run-down apartment 500 miles from anyone in that band playing vidya for 10 hours, sleeping for 9 hours, and playing music in my living room and working for the rest of the time. I'm a fucking telemarketer working from home, my roommate goes out every night and gets groceries, I haven't gone out in weeks. I need fucking help.
>>29452365
Have you tried robbing banks?
>>29452365
hey man, you tried.. sounds like it wasn't a terrible day either
what kind of programming do you do? maybe you could start an interesting project and turn it into a startup or do some other sort of freelance work
I also suggest visiting your Dad, building a good relationship with your family came really help through stuff
That's cool man. I'm going to atlantic city in 8 hours with a couple friends for a week. i'll probably have better stories to tell afterwards
IKTF anon. I leave my apartment every week for food (because the organic hippie co op I shop from doesn't deliver), but yeah, I always spill my all natural whole wheat spaghetti when I'm in there.
I too ventured out in the real world (beyond that) recently. I went to a rather large comic book shop and tried to strike up conversations about The Manhattan Projects, Resident Alien, The Buffy comics, and various anime, all with different people who were clearly interested in those things (were wearing a shirt, looking at the comic, even talking about them!).
Suffice to say the nerds didn't take to my kind very well. A couple of them made fun of my voice and my autistic movements. One tried testing me on a bunch of trivia. I actually got it all, and I thought we would be friends after that. He almost seemed disappointed, and just kind of walked away.
I tried interacting with more normie-tier people in the shop. They were a bit nicer, but they clearly weren't interested in talking either.
I went home, learned how to play Texas hold 'em online, and attended a meet up later that night, but I did poorly at it. Nobody would really respond to anything I said.
We're not really meant for their kind anon.
WHY DOES IT HAVE TO BE THIS WAY! WHY DON'T THEY LIKE US?!!!
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
>>29452365
Dude you are so lucky. No way in hell I would have the courage to ask to join in a game of Frisbee or anything like that
>programming for a living
>autism bux
>never has to leave his apartment
Honestly I don't feel sorry for you anon. I have to have a burger job and share a studio apartment with a semi-Chad. I loathe work, home sucks cause Chad and his girlfriends always make fun of me and are loud as fuck, Flipping burgers is so unfulfilling, social interaction in general is so unfulfilling. I stopped meeting up with my other cyborg friends because it just got dull, and I was irritated just to hear their voices. I loathe humanity, but I have to deal with them just to survive so I can continue to deal with them jus to survive.
I envy your life bro, and trust me when I tell you the normie life wouldn't make you happy if you could get it. I wish I could watch comfy tv all day. I wish I could stay in my cozy apartment that I have all to myself all day. I wish I didn't have work as dehumanizing as burger flipping and talking to retarded shit skins at the register.
There are things you can do to change up your routine, but normie tier stuff isn't it, and be thankful for what you do have.
The grass is always greener I suppose. I'm a failed normie who just wants to withdraw from society. I'm learning to program right now. But even if I git gud, it'll still probably be a bitch to amass enough clientele to make a living off of it.
Do you wanna trade lives, OP?
>>29453536
Yeah legitimate autists like OP don't always have the anxiety or self-awareness that robots have.
Now sometimes autists can develop anxiety by getting intensely bullied for their autistic behavior, but it doesn't develop for all of them, or at least not at the crippling levels that it does for us.
>>29454934
>legitimate autists
Idk m80kins there's something about his writing style that makes me think he's not autistic. He's what we are just to greater degrees in some ways, lesser in others.
>>29454934
Actually, you're wrong
It's a commonly recognized fact among social workers and therapists specialized in autism that most if not all autists are experiencing high levels of anxiety due to the fact their cognitive structure is inherently different than what is considered normal.
This has a lot of impacts on the autist's life from an early age. Impacts going far beyond simple bullying.
>>29455124
Well idk m8 but all I can say is that the anxiety doesn't usually seem to manifest in such a way that it prevents them from going up to strangers and asking to play frisbee, unlike most robots. It manifests in other ways.
>go to Costco
>store is so boring that I want to kill myself
fucking kek what is it about that place? I can't stand it either but it's the only store that sells the exact frozen burritos I like. There is a Korean store that also sells them but individually and they're marked up as hell. While I'm there I buy everything else cause it's cheaper and I'm already there.
I have tired to convince my local safeway to start carrying them without success.
>>29455511
Yeah I got you m8. I hate Whole Foods myself but they're the only ones who sell this Amy's spinach pizza I like so much. Not even vegan but my vegan brother introduced me and I got hooked.
They're building a Sprouts a quarter mile from my house. Hopefully they keep it in stock so I can stop going there.
>>29452365
you had the courage to ask the bros if you could join? fucking normie
also why did u leave the club
>>29455438
Nigga I was an aid to an autism class for 3 weeks, half of them were way too nervous to even tell me their names for the first few days.
>>29455671
Not him but see:
>>29454934
I'm guessing he left the club cause it was a club. The real question is is why he went in there in the first place.
>>29455671
>hasn't left his apartment in 7 weeks
>was autistic enough to get autism bux, something even most of us can't do
>only communicates with his dad on the phone
Not sure I'd call him a normie kek
idk I think maybe the lifestyle was so soul sucking to him that when he got out there all his human fear was gone. Then I guess he got it back as the day went on.
Fuck OP. I make money off my youtube videos (not a youtube personality, I make instructional videos), and doing proofreading for various companies. It's all indoor work but even I still leave the house every few days. There's a theater by my house I go to every week, and an Italian restaurant right by that I eat at sometimes. I also go to the library every 3 weeks to return my 4 books, and then to check out 4 new ones. And I go grocery shopping. These are all things you could be doing that would get you out of the house, and the last one would save you a delivery charge that could maybe pay for the movie and the eating out. It's worth a shot anyway.
As for friends, I was in the same boat you were for years, but then I actually met a guy on /pol/, and we've been hanging out recently. I lucked into that, but maybe you could schedule a meetup and see who comes and what happens.
>people in this thread claim to be rock-bottom robots
>talk about their paying jobs
NORMIES! GIT UFF MUH BERD!
