What can I do to make my boyfriend more open with his emotions?
I really wish he wasn't so stoic all the time and would tell me what's wrong.
>>29450465
suck that nigga dick he'll tell you anything
I don't know if this works the same for gays like you, but roasties tend to lose interest in a man once he opens up to them.
>>29450500
I can't speak for most women. But I love it when a guy shows his emotions. It shows a human side of him
>>29450465
Men feel jack shit.. we're sleepy, hungry or horny. Make him a sandwich and suck his dick and leave him alone.
/soc/
go there and be with your own kind, outlander.
>>29450465
I have the exact same problem.. We used to get along great now he doesn't even reply to my messages anymore, it's like he's avoiding me and I have no idea if I did something wrong or if he just feels depressed. It's the worst..
>>29450516
This.
Originoso0
>>29450532
I know. He acts so moody sometimes. I don't know if I did something wrong of if he's just having one his days.
Some men have really inappropriate emotions most of them. Like most robots I'd guess. Women like to be reassured that their boyfriend isn't insane. The best way to do that might be to hide your emotions. That's why I do it anyway.
>>29450587
Like I ask him if he thinks I'm clingy and he says "idk", I tell him he can talk to me about whatever and I get nothing at all. I really like this guy too and I hate the fact that I might have done something wrong..
>>29450595
>tfw you unleash the crazy
never, ever do this
>>29450465
Once he opens up to you, you'll start hating him.
It's happened in every bullshit relationship i've been in.
Just leave this fucking board, roastie swine.
>>29450646
>Once he opens up to you, you'll start hating him.
>It's happened in every bullshit relationship i've been in.
That is not true for me. I've had two previous boyfriends that opened up and I didn't hate them for it. I'm sorry you went out with bad women.
>>29450681
>I'm not like the other girls xD
t. Roastie.
normo off my boardo
>>29450708
I'm not and you'll have to take my word for it
>>29450646
>Having been in relationships.
>Telling someone else to get off of arkanine.
No u leave.
>>29450752
All my relationships were in high school and ended before I could even get a kiss.
I'm in my late-20's now
I bet you're a youngi kid fresh out of high school here because it's summer and uni hasn't started
>>29450516
>>29450579
Are you two very sad men or delusional women?
>>29450465
>going to r9k
>for relationship advice
rosties when will they learn
You can't. You can never change a guy. You have two options: dump him and find a man who meets your needs for emotional intimacy, or accept that you'll never get what you need and stay with him anyway.
This is the voice of experience speaking. Experience also says you will most likely first deny that these are your choices, and try to find a third alternative. After a lot of spent tears and effort and many disappointments you will fail and try the second choice. When that also fails, you'll go for the first. And quite likely repeat the same pattern with another man or two, until you learn.
Good luck.
>>29450856
I don't want to mean but you guys are sad a lot and I thought you would give me tips on what a woman should do.
>>29450465
First off, GET OUT, NORMIE. REEEEEEEEEEEEE.
>>29450465
You say this, but it's not what you really want.
You wouldn't have been with him if he wasn't stoic all the time.
The proof is in your actions.
>>29450532
I do this when I find a new chick but it's not guaranteed.
>>29450465
get off my board reeee
Just fucking ask him. He probably wants to talk.
>>29450875
>expecting people to know how to react to a situation most of them will never even have the chance to be in because no one gives a shit enough about us to ask about our feelings
Yeah. This /might/ be why people are telling you to fuck off, roastie cunt whore.
>>29450627
You haven't done anything wrong. Relationships end sometimes, even if you do everything right. This one appears to be ending.
If you did do something wrong and he can't talk to you about it, he's also doing something wrong. Not trying is a much bigger mistake than something you're not even aware of doing, and it's a mistake that means it's not possible to save the relationship. He has shut you out. It's on him.
>>29450914
I'm sorry to hear that. You guys need a therapist an friends to confide in :(
>>29450873
Pretty much this, but id extend it to women/people in general. Never expect to be able to change someone. You're only going to dissapoint yourself and brood resentment in both of you.
>>29450951
How is it ending what on earth
We were getting along perfectly and this happens for no reason, we haven't even been doing this very long, I really don't want this to end I like him so much..
>>29451018
It's definitely true of people in general, I only said guys because I'm a straight woman talking to another straight woman.
>>29450963
No shit we do
Your post is essentially taking a huge fucking steak and holding it a centimeter too high for a pack of hungry dogs to reach, the steak being some kind of love, respect, human interaction. The dogs being the majority of r9k
>>29450465
stop trying to change him. you dated him knowing that's how he is and now your trying to force him to change to what you want him to be. typical dumb bitch move
>>29451065
Wow that's really sad. That's why I want my bf to open up because I don't know if he's suffering.
>>29451046
Maybe I understood the situation wrong, but if he doesn't reply to your messages, that's a pretty clear sign. Even if it is just because he's depressed, that doesn't really change anything.
I know breakups can be soul-crushing, but you will make it. Don't lose sight of that.
>>29450963
Different anon, here.
You seem sweet, so I'll tell you how I might like to be approached.
Be direct, but non-threatening, and just tell me that you're there if I ever need to talk, finishing up with maybe a kiss/hug and and an "I love you".
>>29451065
you're an autist of the highest magnitude
>>29450465
women don't really get it, do they?
if he is feeling like shit, he doesn't want to talk about it because it would expose weakness and being vulnerable will only make him feel even more like shit. if everything is going well, he can't share because expressing joy is for fags (and not just homos) which again is a show of weakness. for a man, there is no worse feeling than that of being vulnerable/inadequate/weak. being any of those things, as a man, makes you a waste of space and a drain on those around you. this is why men don't show emotions, roastie. get used to it or get used to lesbianism.
>>29451095
You will never have the kind of warm, communicative, supportive relationship with trust and intimacy you crave until you develop some self respect, m8.
>>29450465
In my experience guys don't talk if they know your friends (or especially theirs) will hear about it
Or maybe the problem is you and he doesn't want to start shit with you by bringing it up
It's most likely just his personality though, get with it or get lost
>>29451105
This is a really unusual thing though, he's only started doing this today. We used to talk all day long and for some reason he's been very cold and distant today. I figure he's been having a bad day or something but I'm so worried
>>29450681
lel and this is why they are you past boyfriends now. your vagina dried out like a hot desert after they got emotional with you.
>>29451128
You don't speak for all men, or even a majority of them. Normal people don't think like you do. You're unusually poorly adjusted. Just thought you ought to know.
>>29451149
Oh, well, if it's just once then that's different. I get that you're worried but it's probably nothing to do with you. Try not to worry and wait for him to explain.
>>29451166
>t. nu-male
say hello to your wife and my kids for me
>>29451153
That's not true. We broke up for different reason.
You don't know anything about me.
>>29450516
>female detected
ree get out etc.
>>29450465
>>29450506
>>29450532
Men don't show emotion because they hide it. Showing emotions outside of anger, hatred, or laughter is a sign of weakness among other men in society, and even too much of any of those is seen as a weakness too.
If you want to get him to be more emotional, you have to be open about yourself, because he'll take it as sign of you offering yourself and he'll respond in return.
>>29450516
Dumb faggot.
>>29451208
I'm a woman who knows many men closely. Even the conservative ones I know intimately don't think the way you described. And it's purely manosphere wishful thinking that women want sex with men who refuse to provide them with emotional intimacy.
>>29450465
No you don't want that
cause he's a man get over it.
>>29451320
How do you know what I want? I've had it happen and I liked it.
>>29450465
He's probably just pondering about motorcycles or other guy shit
It's not that serious
I have a related conundrum, I wish my boyfriend shared more of his thoughts and feelings with me so we could bond. But every time he does, I think he's stupid and want to dump him and go out there to find someone I respect intellectually, relate to and connect with emotionally, who shares my values and world view.
I don't know what I should do. He treats me well and is faithful and really good in bed.
>>29451166
Hes pretty right though... Only nu males constantly talk about their feelings.
>>29451312
Men are most intimate and close with other men emotionally speaking, ironically enough. Though it's usually only with friends and family.
>>29451401
I once told my boyfriend he could cry but once he did all attraction I had for him disintegrated. I had to go to a club that night and fuck a bunch of chads to get that sight out of my head.
>>29451355
liking it < sex
Theres a reason why OP CHOSE the guy who was stoic in the first place.
If she didnt like those traits in him, she wouldent have chosen him.
Never listen to what women say, only observe how they CHOOSE.
>>29451401
>>29451437
Kek, these samefag sockpuppets are funny.
>>29451095
>cyborg here
god damn it. what is he even doing that makes you think hes scared to open up seriously.
ill make a quick assumption before you say anything. you like him cuz hes strong he likes being a strong man and knows you like and or depend on him because of it. telling you his feelings is showing weakness. do you really wanna see your man as weak?
tell me how wrong i am please. because this is like 90% of the problem most of the time
>>29450465
go to /adv/
dumbfuck
>>29451450
I didn't make that other post, and I'm actually in the situation I described. Believe it or not, whatever.
>>29451466
>do you really wanna see your man as weak?
False assumption, because it's very much a male oriented thing. Women genuinely like emotional men (at least, the more intelligent ones do), the "weakness" is concerned mostly with when in the space of other males or in a public space.
>>29451466
I like him because he's cute, funny, has a great job, and a sweet guy. I just wish he would open up.
AAAAAAAH FUCKING NORMALFAGS. I'M SO TIRED OF THESE THREADS GET THE FUCK OUT NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW
>>29451496
Damn I hope you are lying because you are proving us right pretty hard.
>>29450893
>You wouldn't have been with him if he wasn't stoic all the time.
This.
If your boyfriend was ever "emotional" you would be sickened by him and immediately start searching for a Chad cock to gobble on.
>>29451312
>I'm a woman
stopped reading right there desu
without firsthand experience or empirical data, you have no place at this table
>>29451413
I said nothing about constantly talking about their feelings. The anon I was responding to was making plainly false assertions about how most men supposedly behave. I hope you're not one of those retards who thinks it's in any way a useful debate tactic to pretend only extremes exist and mock someone pointing out the stupidity of one extreme view by accusing them of holding the opposite one.
>>29451428
Got sources for that? The ones I've seen were unanimous that men statistically rely on women for their emotional needs and are closest to the women in their lives.
>>29451538
Or maybe I'm just dating someone who isn't a good match to me and the more open he's about the way he is the sooner we can figure it out and move on.
"Your" views, as in the robot world view, is so simplistic it can never be proven right unless you're willing to seriously edit the evidence.
>>29451515
>Women genuinely like emotional men
yeah, they do
like to have them around her
not inside her
>>29451575
>The ones I've seen were unanimous that men statistically rely on women for their emotional needs and are closest to the women in their lives.
Got sources for that?
You're speaking from a Woman's perspective. Men share a tighter bond with each-other because of sociological evolution, it's how we've developed.
Whatever you know, his best friend is probably twice as close to him.
>>29451515
empirical evidence is great and all but im pretty sure most peoples including my own lived experiences shit all over that
>>29451525
ok good so whats he guarded about like you want him to walk in after work and just be like
so i was raped when i was 12
whats he do thats triggered your "he needs to open up" autism?
>>29451699
>>29451699
I want him to feel comfortable around me. I hate that he's as open with strangers as he is with me.
>>29451699
And mine shit all over yours.
I mean, I could mention the fact that I have an actual degree in Social Science, but whatever, it's all perspective apparently anyway.
>>29451297
What do you mean "open about myself"? I've been letting him know how I feel, like if I'm upset or something, he's been giving me nothing though
>>29450465
If it's a lonely life being a man. That goes for Neets, and normies, robots and even Chads all over the world. Some are just better at handling it. From day 1 you're told to "man up" or "brush it off." Maybe have a laugh and just fuck that bitch/job/school/family bro etc. The truth is we're all scared. All of us here. We just don't show it. Because we can't. We're not allowed to. It's not what a "real man" does. Women don't like it. No matter what they say. You're bros will think you're a bitch. So you carry on. Until you cant anymore. And that's why male suicide is higher.
>>29451717
well ok so how the hell long have you known this guy like it takes time to build that level of trust girl. you cant just force that kind of stuff.
>>29451722
like i said empirical evidence i figured youd be some kind of smarty pants being a filthy fucking tripfag and all
all i know is i open up and get btfo for it. maybe i just choose the wrong people.
>>29451653
You're asking me to do your research for you here. You're the one who made an assertion. I don't hold an opinion, as I don't consider the few single studies I have seen to present a conclusive or very nuanced view on the topic.
I'm asking you to back your assertion up. You can't deflect that by saying you want me to back mine up. It makes fuck all difference to me whether you come around to sharing my beliefs or not, what I want to know is whether you have anything at all to back your assertions up or not. Do you? Because as I said, I've already seen the sources I've seen, and there's absolutely no added value in it for me to try and dig them up on google. It's bothersome.
Here are the ones that came up easily.
>https://deepblue.lib.umich.edu/handle/2027.42/45601
>http://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/BF00292464
>>29451794
he means you should open your legs, now get to it and post results
Reminder - Sharing your emotions or crying in front of a girl will dry that pussy up forever.
Pic related.
>Be told to share emotions
>"Comeon whats the worst that will happen?"
>finally share them
>girl loses attraction and says you're whiny and belittles you
>even though she said could trust she tells her friends and they bitch behind back
>It comes back to you and you find even her family says to her "you deserve better than that loser"
>she makes fun of you in public around friends
Gee, I fucking wonder why guys don't wanna share?
>>29450465
What are you doing here outlander?
>>29450646
>Once he opens up to you, you'll start hating him.
This,
Happened to me. Lesson fucking learned.
>>29450465
Start opening up to him, or just make him more comfortable around you overall. The reason why I opened up to my gf is because I felt comfortable with her, like what you'd have with your mother.
>>29452636
that seems a little extreme. they do lose attraction, but it's more subtle than that
>>29452744
>tfw I don't even open up to my own mother
not that she did anything wrong, just the way I am
>>29450465
Ask and give space. The issue a lot of women cause is that they ask for what a guy thinks but get mad when it's not what they want to hear. Don't feel as hyped? Don't feel all that happy or sad? Feel kinda bad but just because it seems like a crappy day?
Even when it comes to being open, men can somehow still be in the objective wrong.
Shitty relationships with that actually happening so that's where my bias comes in.
>>29450525
this is /r9k/
home of the normies.
>>29451249
Why did you break up?
orjormrr
>>29450465
>why do guys always hide their emotions?
i feel [insert something here]
>i don't want to hear that
this is why
>>29452744
>like what you'd have with your mother.
Nothing to see here, just normalfags unable to comprehend anyone but more normalfags existing.
>>29452258
This is me at workExcept I never had a dad
>>29452636
Seriously.
Woman always, FUCKING ALWAYS need to tell someone else personal shit about other people.
>>29453018
>>29452741
>>29452636
Man you guys dealt with shitty woman
>>29451149
If he's an introvert he just needs a break from people, if he's an extrovert he is either depressed or doesn't give a shit. Also you realize this could just be a misunderstanding right? Some people tend to be chatty as hell with people for a while, then run out of shit to say and become quiet and then become chatty as hell again.
Show that you're not so judgmental. Like, when he does start talking about his feelings, don't try to invalidate him.
>Have gf
>Likes it when I talk about my feelings
>Unless it's showing that I'm unhappy with something that she's doing.
>In which case, she gets mad
Please refrain from this, too.
>>29453047
It's just how all woman are my man. I don't think they're all whores or what not, but becoming emotionally comfy with a woman is a fucking meme.
>>29453256
This.
If you're physically comfy with a woman, that's almost easy.
If you're emotionally comfy with a woman? Better make sure it's not a sham.
Don't even mention kinks. You can fit 110% with someone but women are the most judgmental twats ever. Bonus points for her being into what you are...except one kink. And that one thing will become an issue. And it'll be used against you to explain things about you that are almost always negative.
