>Patient comes into the surgery
>Skin appears redder than Pocahontas
>Appears to be suffering from sunburn
>Wants me to give her some ointment
>Give her a lethal dose of morphine instead
yeah, no
joke or reference?
either way it sucks, what were you thinking
>>29410480
Read the file name, you mongoloid.
>>29410480
hello summer.
please get out
I wish I had a doc like that
>>29410836
As a baby he was my GP, no joke.
Grew up in Hyde, Tameside, greater Manchester UK btw. My other Doctor is the one that caught him too, fucking roastie.
>>29410480
>average normalfag who is visiting here for his first time and couldn't even wait a single day before posting
>>29410465
The only meme that is a form of art
Mathew or Daniel shipman could you please fuck off you turbofaggots
>>29410480
>He doesn't appreciate shipposting
>>29410999
nice trips doc
Can I get an ambulance please
>>29410465
this is now an I am a doctor thread
>>29412549
I'm a shitpost doctor. The medicine doesn't taste good but you all need to take it, every hour of every day.
>>29412558
the only medication i can give for terminal stupidity is cancer, so just stay in this thread for a bit and you'll be cured
>>29412575
Just for that you're getting medicated for another two years, you won't escape. I'm everywhere at once.
>>29412603
it's too bad that only the true doctor in this situation, me, can do the medication then, otherwise i might be intimidated by your empty threats of sedation
>>29412619
Your medication has already begun, everywhere you go you'll get a lethal dose of shitposting.
>Be village doctor.
>See the village mayor's fat son stealing apples from the tree in my yard.
>Cannot give him the thrashing he deserves since I owe the mayor tax money, which he has been forgiving since I am the only doctor in the village and we are on good terms.
>But a doctor never forgets...
>And never forgives.
>Some time passes.
>Mayor's son (now vastly obese and bearing a resemblance to a large sack of apples) comes to me complaining of a lump on his chest, near the underarm.
>at first fear it is a resurgence of the plague that had so decimated our fair country but a few years ago.
>upon a closer examination (after donning my largest beak and thickest robes) discover that it is merely a lump, of indeterminate malice
>determine that it is caused by the boy being overly phlegmatic.
>Iknowjusthowtodealwiththis.tapestry
>Treat the boy by beating him to encourage his choler to rise, thus rebalancing his humours.
>Teachyoutostealmyapplesyoulittleshit.canvas
>Despite my ministrations, the lump continues to grow and others like it appear on the boy's body in various places.
>Increase the vigour of my thrashing, but despite my best efforts the boy starts wasting away and passes on a few months later.
>At the boy's funeral I commiserate with the mayor, and express how sorry I am that I could not help him further.
>Afterwards, I go home and eat an apple from my tree.
>It is difficult to eat an apple while wearing a beaked mask, but I persevere.
>I am a doctor.
