Thread replies: 14
Thread images: 4
Anonymous
2016-06-19 09:17:20 Post No. 29385496
[Report]
Image search:
[Google]
Anonymous
2016-06-19 09:17:20
Post No. 29385496
[Report]
>after over 2 decades of autism, obtain gf
>get through the first month without fucking up
>at her place
>out of nowhere she grabs me
>oh fuck here we go
>strip each other
>take turns at giving each other oral
>69ing, get her to cum first.
>cum buckets
>sit up with her, she looks in a lot of pain now
>"whats wrong?"
>"Your cum... it tastes really bad"
>she tries to laugh it off, cuddles up to me
>feel pretty bad, she did decide to tolerate it
>this happens 4 more times, every time she looks disgusted after i cum in her mouth
>decide i need to do something
>conduct research into the properties of semen
>find out its slightly basic, but can be made worse by poor diet
>guilty.jpg
>decide i need to make my cum more acidic so the two will balance out (acid + base = salt + water... right?)
>buy a massive bag of lemons
>juice them all, drink up.
>2 litres of the stuff, acidic as hell, but doing it for her
>get to her house
>69ing as usual, nice and erect
>out of nowhere my bladder gets very heavy
>fuck
>cock starts to go floppy, can feel piss moving towards cock
>why oh why did i drink all that lemon juice
>abort mission, repeat, abort mission!
>try to get her off me
>too late, what feels like a swimming pool of piss erupts from my semi flaccid cock right into the back of her throat
>severe burning sensation as it comes, feels like someone lit a ghonarea infested cock on fire
>gf gags and starts to hit me
>try to explain myself as she throws me out by telling her exactly what i did
>ONE WEEK LATER
>not a word from her
>at birthday getting shitfaced with normie friends, all 6 of them say they bought presents for me
>go outside to see what
>all 6 of them have bought me little lemon trees, fucking 6 of the things in pots in my front yard
>all of them pissing themselves laughing, apparently gf told everyone what i did
>"ha...ha... h...hilarious g...guys..."
>plant the things
>they all die within a month
>quite like my semen, my soil pH is way too high
Fuck i hate lemons
