>don't know who I am
>analysed myself and the world so much I don't understand anything anymore
>what is my role in the world
>why am I so alone
>why do I care so much
>but dad says I don't care enough (kek rhyme)
>sometimes I love everyone, sometimes I loathe everyone
>I laugh at the crudest of jokes
>next I'm totally melancholic and humorless
>I'm filled with contradictions, my mind's a mess
>falling, falling
Anyone know that feel?
we are defined by the people we surround ourselves with
>>29278174
same here existing fucking sucks doesn't it
srsly maybe hormones or somethin
>>29278174
I think this is something alot of us deal with. I spend every fucking night trying to sleep but I can't cause things like this pop into my head. I hate existing. I don't really want to die I just want to have never existed
>>29278233
And if we are alone?
>>29278374
You're here aren't you? We might not be around physically but we still interact with each other
>>29278174
There is no identity at all. People just make shit up along the way. You're in fact in zero state, no need to worry.
http://www.lawofone.info
http://terebess.hu/english/tao/gia.html
http://www.principiadiscordia.com/book/5.php
join us, wanderer.
....u r godless
>>29278415
you could also bury your head in books.
>>29278451
>unironic weeb shit
what you need is some wholesome christian literature. c. s. lewis, jack kerouac, phillip k. dick, maybe some tolkien, kafka. get some good old christian shame in your blood circulatory system
>>29278174
sounds like you just described me
>>29278498
>weeb shit
what exactly about taoism, discordianism, and some weirdo new-age egyptian veneration is weeb?
>>29278533
ironic xenophobic shitposting, sorry, they all look like good reads
>>29278498
What was the point in even posting that image? Normies don't know how to meme
>>29278174
You are what you repeatedly do. Simple definition.
You are a moody faggot.
>>29278174
Become a writer. Come to /lit/.
>>29278617
trying to leave this website burnt out the last circuits resembling any social discourse my brain had. i'm too far gone.
>>29278174
Sort of. I see my mind as a pleasant place to retreat to. If people think I'm being erratic, it's usually because they don't see all the things that influence my behavior, and I see little purpose in informing them.
A lot of people like to think they're empathetic. Even robots.
>>29278233
No.
>>29278415
Oh god.
>>29278233
I don't know if that applies to me, I've always defined myself. Usually in contrast to the people I'm surrounded by. I'm so edgy I don't even make an identity or fashion statement out of my edgyness. I'm so introverted that I've learned to act like a normie just to be left alone.
Now I don't want to be alone anymore, and I deliberately surround myself with groups of people that share my hobbies, yet I always keep them at an arms' length. I have no home, or at least I feel that way.
>tfw I thought I chose loneliness but loneliness chose me
>>29278300
I won't fall for your tranny meme. Reeeeee...
>>29278339
ktf fampie, ktf
>>29278451
>>29278498
Idk guys, I've been burnt too many times by spiritual beliefs, and besides they're just arbitrary. I might be too autistic to go beyond a material understanding of the world, I can't even bring myself to meditate.
>>29278626
Yeah, I know m8. I am what I do and I do what I am. Chicken meet egg :'-(
>>29278681
r9k is the parasite that feeds on our festering corpse. Lonk live r9k
>>29278647
I'd like to be a writer, but I have no discipline.
Thanks for replies everyone, I feel less mad at myself about not going to a 12 step meeting.
>>29279005
>Idk guys, I've been burnt too many times by spiritual beliefs, and besides they're just arbitrary.
that's probably for the best. trying to force it on yourself is only going to cause a headache, at least. you sound like you're further ahead as a person then me, most of the time i feel like another role-playing shitter jerking himself off intellectually.
>>29278174
Are you me?
Honestly, I have no idea what's going on anymore.
>>29278174
I wish there would be a book about me because now i have no idea who am i. Name and surname means nothing, i dont have strong inner values or strong character. I feel like amplifier - i can bring out best of others but nothing out of myself.
>>29279343
>i can bring out best of others but nothing out of myself.
Oh god, this.
I give people life advice and it helps them.
Meanwhile there's no advice for my life.
Your purpose is to watch this beautiful, horrifying disaster, as it all happens in slow motion right in front of you. Welcome to the robot, enjoy the ride.
>>29279305
I felt I was a rare exception in that I feel like I became somebody else during my teen years and lost the solid foundation of identity and character I had when I was younger. I feel empty.
>>29279496
Just watch? Walking through life as the eternal bystander? Why not properly connect with people you could actually care for? Why is that so hard?
>>29279275
Don't get me wrong, I actually envy anyone with an established set of beliefs that works for them. I've been reading a lot about mysticism, magick and the occult recently, also tulpas and thoughtforms. That shit's amazing, but I'm too paranoid to buy into any belief with so much conviction that I start hallucinating.
>>29279305
Now I feel warm and fuzzy, but I wonder if we would even recognize our kinship if we met IRL. We might have literally nothing in common, except this feel. Funny thought.
>>29279343
>>29279439
I used to think I could help others but not myself, now I'm not so sure about the former. The whole "gotta love yourself b4 you can love others" meme has a point. How can the blind lead the blind? Then again, maybe we're all blind.
>>29279714
I care for my nephew, but why? Just because he's family? What makes him more important than any starving african child? Yeah, I drew that card, but seriously? The futility...
There is no meaning, love doesn't exist, free will is a lie; we all run off of the same neurotransmitters and hormones.
The goal is life is to fuck and reproduce.
>>29280254
It's a biological urge, not the goal. It's not my goal in any case. We make our own goals, our own meanings.
But I don't see the point in any of it. Well, sometimes I do. Right now I don't. I just feel an urge to go and buy some sweets (stfu I'm swedish it's our drug of choice), then sit back down here and indulge myself. Drugs and intellectual masturbation go so well together.
>>29280186
yo op, you know what? who cares who you are right now. You can choose who you will be, but only if youre willing to commit. Who do you want to be? and is it worth throwing all your habits away? if so, then do it. anyone can.
>>29278174
>>29278300
>>29279305
>>29279343
I feel you brothers
I swear I'm going insane. 20 years from now I'll be a babbling incoherent mess.
Brb.
>>29278746
(You)
>>29278174
>noid entity
What did OP mean by this?
>>29280740
Thanks. I'm pretty fucking special and everyone should give me a round of applause.
>>29278174
>Anyone know that feel?
Yes, I know this feel, it's called being human and not falling into group thinking like a low IQ piece of shit. Now stop romanticizing it and get on with life.
>>29278626
This.
My identity is pretty set at this point, I'm a bitter loner
>>29278174
Fuck man, I know this way too much. I don't know what I want out of live, I don't know whether I should just resign to apathy and give up on the world, I don't know what I believe in, I don't know if I should try to become a better person with good morals or just go down the path of hedonism.
>>29278174
That's the first step, brother, to realize that all you knew was bullshit.
You're ready to find some objective truth now.
>>29281809
Nigga please, don't you tell me about objective truth. I've seen the truth and it was awful. If only I believed all the convenient lies normies buy into I wouldn't have to feel so shit about myself and the world. The further down the rabbit hole I go, the more my health deteriorates. People weren't meant to think so much.
Also hello I'm back
>>29280771
kek'd
>>29281347
Low IQ people are literally superior. They win at everything except logical thinking. Moshlems will take over the West because their culture breeds low IQ Chads with strong (im)moral convictions. The power of stupidity is awe inspiring
>>29281623
Same. I'm at a crossroads, and if I wait too long to choose, a path will be chosen for me. Probably degeneracy.
>>29282073
Thinking is like working out, no pain no gain.
Hello anons. I embrace mimic life, it's ok I guess. There's not much to it. We do turn into those we surround ourselves with. I wish I knew more successful people to imitate. But, I'm alive. I am 32 and have never had goals.
>>29280566
>tfw unwilling to commit
>>29282353
Don't you fuckin' lecture me about thinking boi. I am the high priest of thinking. I spent all my life thinking. I have the scars to prove it. Well, can't show them because they're mental scars but you catch my drift
>>29282454
God bless, never change. Or well, maybe you should, I dunno.
>>29282632
>scars
Is that what you call knowledge now?
>>29283004
Some knowledge is too much for a human to bear. Don't you know your Lovecraft?
>>29278233
I had friends from all circles. I never established an identity. Because of that I now have no friends.
>>29279305
Me to, I got really sad, and happy, I usually have friends but with each of them I have to be a different person, idk who I am anymore,,, multiple personality disorder , maybe
>>29278174
You took my feel op, just replace father with everyone in my family except mom who says I care too much
>TL:DR Your will and your ego have nothing to do with each other, the more you let go of the latter the more you allow yourself to be absorbed into the former which is identical with the will of the universe. Suffering is the friction between what you are and what you think you are.
This is an interesting statement. Read it on occult leddit. Does it make sense to you guys? If so, can the universe will me to do things I'd otherwise find reprehensible, and feel no moral qualms about it because it's the will of the universe? Could I end up like Mohammed the warrior prophet or Alisteir Crowley or Rasputin? Doesn't seem impossible to me. This is why I'm afraid of the spiritual path
>>29283467
The will of the universe doesn't take the form like the will of a man does. When they say "becoming absorbed into the will of the universe" they mean something similar to enlightenment. Your multiple selves begin acting in accordance. All of your eyes open at once.
>>29278174
yes.
solution: go collect new data.
>>29283467
>Could I end up like Mohammed the warrior prophet or Alisteir Crowley or Rasputin?
No, because they were charismatic extroverts, you're an ugly basement neckbeard.
>>29283512
What do you mean? These men weren't enlightened? Surely you agree, all of them channelled spiritual powers of some kind, which they worked to earn?
>>29283727
wow rude!!
