>Have you been sexually active lately?
Masturbation counts right?
I just jerked off in the waiting room. Remember how we shook hands moment a go?
>Went to hospital emergency department recently with swollen lymph node
>Young cute nurse asks if I have kissed anyone in the past 6 months or so
>"Haha..no..not really, no..."
>Looks at me skeptically "Are you surrre"?
>"No, I swear, haha"
>Glances at me and shrugs, can tell she literally doesn't believe that I haven't kissed anyone in the last 6 months
>implying
>imblyign
>It says here your blood type is... Be Negative... is that correct?
>Maybe you should try to be a bit more optimistic
Doctor, I appreciate the levity but this butt plug is not going to push itself through
>>29275371
Nah, I kinda just lie there.
Bitch likes to take command.
>>29275513
That means you don't seem like a total sperg, you fucking autistic cunt.it's a good thing, which you obviously couldn't figure that out
I work at a hospital and I can assure you, being a virgin is far from the weirdest/most embarrasing stuff they see or hear there.
>>29275636
Pray tell, anon
xxxoriginalxxx
>>29275636
this. a guy came in with a penis pump stuck to his dick and is girlfriend following him laughing.
>>29275689
p-penis pump?
do i even want to know
>>29275371
>did a yearly physical
>doc asks if I'm have sex regularly
>n-no
>really?
>yes
>well would you like to get tested for stds?
>i dont have any
>but you cant know for sure
>I've never had sex
>oh
JUST
>>29275717
forces blood into the dick to make erections bigger
no idea how the fuck he got it stuck, i'm just the secretary
>>29275717
have you never seen Austin Powers?
>>29275371
"N-no sir"
>Oh? When was your last sexual encounter?
"I-I have never had one."
>But it says here you are 28 years old, hmmm, interesting *writes something down*
*beings to sweat profusely, asks to be excused, runs out of clinic and drives home*
>>29275371
shit is worse when is a nurse asking all that shit.
>>29275745
HAHAHA
you fucking numale
>>29275686
Last week there was a patient, a man about 30 years old, who got a heart attack while jerking off. I've also heard of people coming in with their sicks stuck in different places, bottles and vacuum-cleaners seem quite popular. Things getting stuck in asses happen more often than one might believe.
Protip: if you don't want to sit down in the waiting room, the staff is going to assume you have something in your ass (depends on what type of clinic of course)
>>29275968
*dicks stuck
Only had sex once
Currently seeing a girl and we've tried 5 times but I can't get it up because of nerves. I'm worried she'll leave soon because I can't get a hard on when we are about to have sex
It's definitely a mental thing because when we are just hulking out I'll have a raging hard on or when she's not around
well I lost my virginity to a tranny on last january :33
>>29275371
Yeah I play dark souls.
>>29275371
tfw want to bang my doctor
Who knows this feel
>>29276076
Make sure she's still getting orgasms with you and she's more likely to stick around. I had similar problems. Spend more time naked with her with no expectation of fucking, just get comfy. Stop all porn and masturbation if you can. And consider a cock ring, it's a wise investment now and it feels even better later in life when your dick is on point
I will be if you kiss me, handsome.
>>29276563
Yeah good idea mate that's what I've been doing, haven't been able to fuck but still having a good time naked anyway
Are cock rings really that good? Might need to invest in one
>>29276099
Enjoy your aids, you homo
>>29275745
k3kk
>>29275371
>ask ur mam bruv
