It's another Mental Illness General, feel free to post any stories or feels, venting is welcome as always.
I was diagnosed with schizophrenia a few weeks ago, been taking some antipsychotics (rexultI) and I can only hope that one day, my parents will treat me like a normal person again, I hate how it is now.
Bump
fucking original22
>>29254698
Is my current mental state because of my shitty circumstances or are my circumstances because of my shitty mental state?
I can answer you every other question but this
Fucking schizo senpai
I hate my life
>>29255239
Why does it have to be either/or? It's almost definitely both.
>>29254698
Antisocial personality disorder and ADHD normie reporting in
>>29254698
tfw avoidant personality and depersonalization disorder.
i actually had hope before i saw this thread.
>>29254698
where is tourette located?
this is what I have
>>29255277
Eyy, the Ol ditchomy
I like you
>>29254698
>Major Depression
>Avoidant Personality Disorder
>Borderline
2/3 robot 1/3 tumblr
I am okay with that
>tfw first mental hospital stay tomorrow
Z Y P R E X A B O Y S
>all the signs of avoidant personality disorder fit me perfectly
>will probably never actually get diagnosed because i would be too nervous to ever talk to a therapist
it's gotten to the point where i can't do simple things like email a professor for information, or place any kind of phone call, or participate in any social events
it's not that i have trouble during the thing, it's that i can never decide to do it in the first place
and then after the fact i wish i hadn't done it
To anyone with DID or Depersonalization Disorder. Have you ever tried suboxone? You should, also get a hobby while on it.
>>29254698
Jeffrey Dahmer had borderline personality disorder. Almost every killer had it bpd is the worst mental disorder you can have while major depressive disorder is hardly even real. That's what every girl at my school had, they even needed to "come Out with their depression" in front of the class. Depression is a fake joke. It means your lazy. Bpd is real so fuck off and fuck that chart.
>>29255368
Dude isn't that a heroin addict drug. Like they give it to Ron addicts. I used to getit from my junkie friend.
Bipolar disorder, so I'm a fucking tumblr-tier now. I'm done.
Bye guys, I'm going to dye my hair pink and post a depressive whatsapp status
is tourette robot tier?
>MDD robot tier
>Bipolar tumblr tier
Why? I'm not fully bipolar, but I definitely get at least hypomanic and have had some very intense rapid cycling/mixed state type situations, and I don't understand how those make me less of a robot.
>>29255368
You do realize that opioids will make anyone with pretty much any mental illness feel better, right? That's the nature of the chemicals. And it's comically easy to end up addicted to drugs if you self medicate, you need extraordinary self control to avoid it.
>>29255419
Any disease you can't pretend to have robots can't have. Cuz you know they all just fake it for neet bux and attention
>>29255400
Major Depression is being afraid of your ego. Its literally worse than depersonalization.
>>29255450
Okay fine, only naloxone then. Kappa receptor inactivity is a culprit of depersonalization.
OCD and Major Depression here.
I agree depression is a bullshit disorder from the outside, those people at >>29255400 school weren't actually depressed. Mine resulted in numerous suicide attempts, alcoholism and dropping out of school for a while, although I blame myself for those more so than the disorder. At any rate, blaming your failings on being mentally ill is pathetic. The only thing they set are your limitations, achieve within those and you're doing ok.
BPD 2. I'm normal often enough I want to believe I'm normal.
When depression hits, it hits fucking hard though. The low points are getting lower. The high points are barely hitting normal.
Gettin old feeling this but I'm not taking the drugs.
>>29255484
where did you find this info?
also, where is one supposed to acquire either of these chemicals?
>no schizoid in the chart
It's literally the robot illness.
>>29255484
Fair enough, I didn't realize nalaxone was effective for that. What about naltrexone? It plays a similar role to naloxone for recovering addicts, and only requires one monthly shot.
>>29255459
Here I googled it
>The persistent feeling of sadness or loss of interest that characterizes major depression
Ur just sad and when you get told to get over yourself you say "no I have a mental disorder I refuse to get over the fact I was bullied"
My uncle had bpd and murdered my grandpa that's more robot than "ohh woe is me my fee fees were hurt by chad in high school" wait now that I think about it no it's not.
>>29255500
Suboxone would require a doctors prescription, and it would be hard as fuck to actually get. The only easy way to get it is if you're addicted to heroin, and that's a shitshow you don't want to introduce into your situation.
Naloxone isn't scheduled, and it's easy to get in the form of Narcan as a OD antidote, but that wouldn't work for what that other guy is suggesting (I think). You might be able to find it online somewhere, and it wouldn't be illegal.
It's hard to take this thread seriously with that op image
>>29255565
Just ignore the picture and engage in the thread.
>>29254698
I feel like such a meme when I reply to these things. Avoidant PD and major depression reporting in. Had some depersonalization a few months back, 2/10 would never do again.
To be honest I really hate rankings of mental illnesses like this. It makes it into some kind of oppression olympics or a contest to see who's most pathetic. You can be happy and have schizophrenia and be absolutely miserable with insomnia, for example. Keep these charts on tumblr.
>>29255502
I dont have MDD.
>bipolar
>bpd
>>29255502
>>29255299
Ignore the image. Some idiot made it a while back and it keeps getting reposted for some reason
What is it about borderline girls that makes my dick diamonds?
>>29255500
Hanging around pharma nerds and experimenting on people in general. *insert that reaction image with the stale smile*
Avoidant personality disorder and major depressive disorder here
>>29255594
It's stupid. I have social anxiety, bpd and ocd and i couldn't tell you which has ruined my life morei also have add. People go ape shit when you say that on here
>ADHD
>OCPD
Just fuck my shit up.
>Really perfectionistic about everything, but can't focus well enough to make everything perfect
>>29255613
idk, you're a sadomasochist?
>>29254698
Having adhd while being self aware is horrible actually. It is just so over-diagnosed that every other normie takes medicine for it.
>>29255434
>>29255299
meme illness. tourettes is not real
>>29255696
Well, I am. But I think it's more of the shared elation of the highs and my retarded white knight complexes joy taken in the lows.
>>29254698
robot/beyond help for me
tfw when schizophrenia and depersonalization
OCD, bipolar type 1, sexual sadism and paraphilia NOS (necrophilia) reporting in.
>tfw you try watching Hannibal for the first time and it's the first piece of live-action fiction you've seen that adequately depicts violent intrusive thoughts
Depersonalisation & avoidant personality disorder with minor depression and a little autism to top it all of.
Is there even any hope famalam?
how is OCD robot-tier but bipolar disorder, which is significantly more serious, is tumblr-tier?
>>29255754
>tourettes isn't real
c'mon man come up with something more elaborate than that. Why do you think it isn't real? What evidence do you have to back up your claim? Facts nigga facts otherwise this thread is just a circlejerk
>>29255901
Not trying to defend the shitty chart, but severe OCD is bad enough that it can kill, or at the very least disrupt your life to the point where you can no longer function.
>>29255901
do you have ocd or something? stop trying to pick out faults in the Ops image.we all know it's shit hopefully Op will choose a better image next time
>>29255948
all cases of Ocd? or only the worst cases?
>>29255986
The worst, of course. There is a spectrum of the illness that ranges from a minor annoyance to devastatingly intense, unrelenting suffering.
>>29256002
I know i was just saying because bipolar is one of the mental illnesses with the highest suicide rates. Each mental dissorder affects a person in a different way
I think I might have legit OCD, but I don't want to seem like a special snowflake, so I just assume I have strange and uncommon mannerisms.
>>29256029
I specifically said "severe" as a qualifier to distinguish what I was talking about from moderate or mild OCD. The same thing applies to bipolar disorder or any other illness
>>29256054
Does it distress you and/or interfere with the quality of your life? If so, see a good psychiatrist or psychologist and tell them about your symptoms. Couldn't hurt to get a professional opinion.
Chronic anxiety pretty much all my life, although one of my therapists seems to think I'm dysthymic as well. Been off and on antidepressants, but never could tolerate the side-effects, and they more often than not exacerbated my anxiety or thrust me into some kind of mood disorder.
Tried benzos for a while, but quitting was hands down one of the shittiest experiences of my life. No one is exaggerating how extreme benzo withdrawals are. I'm still wading through withdrawals almost a month later. Literally all I want to do is curl up in the floor and die. I have what feels like a persistent brain freeze, my anxiety has come back tenfold, I am dead tired even after ten hours of sleep, every day feels like an out-of-body experience, and stimuli is so overwhelming that even turning on my TV makes me want to vomit.
>>29255754
yes
I probably can't stand still and keep up a normal conversation (coprolalia) because I want to, right?
DPD/DR for 4 years now, honestly pretty chill with it at this point, makes me feel comfortable around other people. Being sequestered from everyone else is actually quite blissful.
>>29256086
>Does it distress you and/or interfere with the quality of your life?
Yes. It couldn't hurt to open up on an anonymous image board, so here's a really long post.
I looked up signs of OCD (stupid, I know) and one thing that stuck with me was that people with OCD are more prone to intense, extremely uncomfortable intrusive thoughts, which I've been getting my whole life. I also have a lot of ritualistic behaviors that get made fun of by family members, but it doesn't stop me from doing it because I have a drive to do it and will get really distressed and frustrated if it isn't done the exact way it should be. For example, one "ritual" I have is that I can't and refuse to take a shit unless my hair is tied back and my shirt is still on.I'm a guy, by the way.
I'm also very lazy, but as soon as I start doing something, I go into overkill and fuss over really small details. This carries over to video games, where even creating a character becomes challenging and frustrating because of the small detail thing. I have so many more things wrong with me that make me suspect I have OCD. Those are just some examples. I really really hate going to doctors and shit, but you're right.
Until I get a professional opinion though, I'm going to assume I'm just really weird.
>>29256234
>tfw you're with family members and thoughts of having sex with them pop up in your mind
I just want to curl up and die when that happens. Even talking about this now is making me nauseous
Nice to see a thread that actually matters.
>>29256344
>tfw you're with family members and thoughts of having sex with them pop up in your mind
I know this feel so much! Not a lot of people can really relate to this. But it excites me to know that someone gets it.
>>29256344
>tfw you're at a funeral and you are fighting nearly overwhelming urges to jump the corpse and make love to it in front of everyone
>tfw you're visiting your little brother's grave and struggling with intrusive thoughts about digging him or the surrounding bodies up
>tfw there's a terrorist attack or some other violent crime and you're jealous of the attacker
>tfw you can't stop yourself from masturbating to images of the victims and the self hatred is so intense you want to vomit the entire time and for hours afterwards
Words cannot describe the amount of anguish this shit causes me.
>>29254698
>beyond hope-tier
>depersonalization disorder
Fuck you I'm fine
>>29256438
Fuck man that terrible. I think i remember you from other threads, are you managing to get any help?
>>29256438
>tfw there's a terrorist attack or some other violent crime and you're jealous of the attacker
>tfw you can't stop yourself from masturbating to images of the victims and the self hatred is so intense you want to vomit the entire time and for hours afterwards
These last two I can't tell if you're trolling or if these are fucked up intrusive thoughts that even I haven't had.
>>29256468
Thanks for asking m8. I'm doing exposure therapy as we speak to try and help reduce the anxiety the intrusive thoughts give me. It's so hard, though, even though I've made visible progress in the last week it's a fucking struggle.
>>29256484
Why in God's name would I troll about something like that? It's one of my most common intrusive thoughts, I don't even watch the news anymore because it bothers me so much.
>>29256122
Have you tried Pregabalin?
>>29256621
Not him, but Lyrica fucked my liver and I had to stop taking it
I was expecting a lot of it
feels bad
>Bipolar
>Tumblr tier
Nigga who the fuck made this.
Also who /OCD/ here?
>>29255901
OCD is fucking awful.
All these are actually fucking awful. You guys are retarded trying to rank them.
>>29256520
Glad to hear man. Yours is probabily the most fucked up case of ocd i've ever heard of
>>29256446
>>29256200
how do you cope? i'm 2 years into DPD and i'm just losing the will to live. i even tried a couple programs, including harris harrington's total integration method but no real progress.
>>29255645
and it really helps depersonalization?
>>29255818
are you me??
>>29256438
Yo, I feel you fellow OCDbro.
I've checked out my Mom's ass, fought the urge to beat my grandmother to death with her own cane, molest animals too many fucking times.
Intrusive thoughts are destroying my sanity. I can't sleep because of them. I know EXACTLY how you feel.
>Anon, your aunt died
>All I can think of is her cold naked body and me pounding into her decaying body
>Despise myself, start picking at my head again
My hairline is fucking bleeding, senpai. I have several scars on my forehead where I banged my head into walls to get the intrusive thoughts to go away.
I just recently bashed a hole in the drywall with my head.
I want help so fucking bad but I'm scared to seek it
>If you go get help you'll go crazy!
FUCK OFF INTRUSIVE THOUGHTS YOU'RE A NIGGER FUCKING BITCH
>>29256621
>Have you tried Pregabalin?
Thought about it, but I don't know if fibromyalgia drugs are cross-tolerant with benzos. Maybe they technically are benzos, for that matter. They work the same way. If that's the case, it could simply prolong my withdrawal.
I've been trying to research the possibility of these drugs being used to treat benzo addiction, but I haven't come up with any useful results.
>>29256768
I just live my life as i normally would. At the beginning I would constantly self-monitor and purposefully notice symptoms just to be able to tell if I still had it and it made it 10x worse. Went to therapy and it didn't really help, so I just started ignoring it as much as possible and living as if it weren't there, it hasn't gotten rid of it but it definitely helps. ive heard that the key to recovery is externalising yourself and "living in the moment"
>>29255490
i know some of that feel
my ups are still pretty high though. loads of drugs, blowing off a shit ton of money on a whim, getting tattoos even though i find them disgusting normally, all while keeping it down low enough people think its fun antics.
alsomaleborderline. it amuses me right now but i'll an hero later.
>>29256753
Thank you. It fucking sucks but believe me there's still worse out there.
>>29256812
Man I feel you so hard. Trust me on this, though, there is help out there and it can get better.
How do you cope with the thoughts when you're around other people? That's the hardest for me since I can't engage in any of my compulsions.
Major depression and gender dysphoria here
I'm on my second week of Zoloft, what kind of side effects should I expect?
>>29257740
you doing anything for the latter?
zoloft if i recall made me feel bloated and decreased sex drive
bipolar disorder + social anxiety + major depressive disorder (recurrent) checking in.
Where my self medicators at? I'm maintaining my existence with prescription meds and weed, but a significant part of me wants to just get a hotel room somewhere nice and drown myself in heroin and cheap benzo's.
>>29257801
M8 you either have bipolar or MDD, not both
>>29254698
>Tourette not on the list
ok
>>29256812
Don't worry anon. Therapists can't legally say anything about their patients unless they're a threat to others.
It may take a few therapists, but you will find someone who understands, and they will help you get the care that you need.
I want to see you get better, anon
>>29257762
I'm getting estrogen on the 23rd, and I've never been so excited in my life. Other then that, I've been morphing my diet and exercise routines to make my body more feminine as well as buying clothes, makeup, and such.
My sex drive hasn't so much as decreased than had morphed. I don't get random erections anymore, but I get super attached to people and fantasize about having SRC with them. Also, I last a lot longer, and my orgasms hand gotten way stronger.
>>29254698
Schizoaffective and borderline here to tell you that your chart is fucking stupid.
My borderline has caused me a lot more tangible trouble than my schizophrenia and depression. Why is it so high up?
>>29254698
>bipolar disorder
>tumblr tier
I don't have it, but how fucking stupid can you be to rank it there? People with true bipolar 1 have to be institutionalized because they become extremely psychotic and violent. I'm going to make a new chart of my own soon.
>>29257956
i'm happy for you anon. best of luck.
>>29256825
Pregabalin is more of an anti-convulsant than a benzo, though. You might want to ask a doctor about this.
Post your daily meds.
I'll start.
>Carbamazepine
>Citalopram
>Clonazepam
BPD. Life is good. It took me years to find this prescription. I remember one doctor that actually tried everything on me, till my body started to shake uncontrollably.
I think my mom called a health ward on me over the weekend. I got a message from someone while I was sleeping (I work late thus sleep late), and when I googled the number it was a mental/rehab facility my parents went to for stuff. My first thought was that maybe one of them went back, but when I called, apparently a female had left a message with my number to call me back.
I guess I'm slipping more than I thought.
Updated versiaroni. Origanoli.
>>29257928
Dianosed as major depressive disorder but bipolar runs in my family so its a bit weird right now im taking Lamictal, gabapentin and seroquil
>>29258320
>lithium
>abilify
>wellbutrin
>propranolol
It hurts to live but the meds make it a little better
>>29258029
Thank you.
>>29258347
Psych wards aren't anything to be scared of, anon. I just got home from one. The staff is very nice.
>>29258477
there's a very real difference between something you voluntarily enter and something you get invol'd into, especially if you can't actually remember the circumstances that got you committed.
especially the in patient population. involuntarily is terrifying.
FTFY
inb4 B-BUT MUH ANXIETYYY
ME SOOOO SHYYYYY
ME NO LIKEY TALK PEOPLE WAH WAH WAAAAH
:(((((
>>29258359
where did bipolar go?
why would you hang on to mdd but not the thing that is just mdd+more shit?
>>29254698
Depersonalization disorder and BPD here. I'm taking medication and doing much better than I was as a teenager.
>>29258550
I erased bipolar because I don't think it's tumblr but I don't think it's robot either.
>>29255283
Don't those contradict? Do you still feel scared of people when you're depersonalized?
>>29258444
oh look we're almost med buddies
>lithium
>seroquelpass on the abilify desu
>wellbutrin
>lamictal (pretty sure it's just a sugar pill)
>strattera
>>29255606
>I don't like the image so the person who made it is an idiot
Retard.
>>29257956
I actually think I've talked with you before. I was OCDbro with the qtgf
>>29258624
Aw shit that's crazy. I have been on lamictal before, it worked for about 8 months then I developed too much of a tolerance. Shit was horrible, but wellbutrin almost is a decent substitute.
How is seroquel?
>>29258477
I'm sure it is. My parents had a great time there. Only mild sarcasm.
It's not then ware that's scary. It's the bill. I don't have insurance, and I already need to come up with 2 grand in 2 months for a root canal and crown. Guess what's literally impossible, btw. I'm lucky if I bring home $1200 a month, which doesn't leave much left when bills are done.
On top of that, I'd be missing work while there, which really makes it that much more unaffordable.
>ADHD
>mild
Perhaps it's given too easily but its been a massive hindrance in my life. Ignoring major depressiion, autism, depersonalization disorder and social phobia it's certainly rather disabling. I had so much I wanted to do in life and it was practically as disabling as the depression I developed later in the sense that I couldn't work towards a single goal. I had a goal, then I found a new one. Trying to work towards the old one was just not feasible.
>>29258477
i don't understand why people go to the psych ward
for someone who's already in the system, is there any reason besides suicide/homicide/etc prevention?
i can't imagine you get helpful treatment in the course of a week, especially considering they put you down on high doses
>>29258656
his reasoning as to why each mental illness went into each category was idiotic
>>29258593
there's no point erasing the bloody thing. Create a cyborg tier or something
>>29254698
I score 3 out of 5 in robot tier and 1 out of 5 in Beyond hope teir. What do I win?
>>29258758
seroquel is my white knight
i don't even feel so bad about losing brain volume 40% faster than people who don't take antipsychotics
>no mania
>apparently highly effective at treating and preventing depressive episodes too
>no psychosis of any kind
>extreme sedation when i take my evening dose. it's like an eject button when things go wrong.
>even more helpful than strattera for my adhd
>the only side effects i've gotten are fatigue, mental fog and sometimes emotional blunting right after taking it, and also hunger and a weird difficulty swallowing at that same time. but that's when i go to sleep. feel great the next morning.
>weight gain is common but i haven't gained a pound
i hope i don't get a tardive dyskinesia or some shit cause i don't know what i'd do without itwe'd probably put the lithium back up to 1.5mmol/l
>>29259030
Damn son that sounds like a miracle drug. Lithium has given me a bad tremor and tardive is right around the corner, without treating my depression. At least the mania is under control.
>>29255818
Exactly like me
>>29258616
Hey >>29258844 here.
To some degree it conflicts. Before the depersonalization came about I couldn't really do a lot of social stuff because of the fear. Now it's not that I can't do it. It's that I avoid it because I know the effects make me unable to do many other things. I could probably walk around naked in public. It's nothing I'd be averse to if I saw benefit in it. But I know it'd probably harm me quite badly. You notice these emotions in different ways you feel tired. You start being unable to think well. You can't really set your mind where you want it to, it just 'disappears'. It'd be appropriate to describe it as scary except on a more theoretical level. It's less control and it's quite annoying to suddenly be there.
But it's not really what bothers you the most. The backdrop to depersonalization is far worse. It's something your doctors avoid talking about. I had to tell mine again after 3 appointments. Having made it perfectly clear the first time it was my biggest issue and I wanted a fix. They don't want to tell you there's no known fix. You forget what you used to be like when you felt. Your mortal coil stops mattering in just about every way and it bothers those you care about on a more ideological level so you just start doing stuff you don't care for just because other people demand it of you. You can't be sure of how you're doing when it comes to anything. You see yourself increase in ability and only the most concrete measurements matter because those normal feelings of getting better aren't there. You start trying to reproduce situations where you're sure you felt something. You start misremembering what feelings were like. You start exploring extreme emotional states like sadness (far easier to achieve than happiness) just to see what pierces the shroud. And when it does it just reaffirms your desperation because you want to feel. It's what makes life worth living.
I'd much rather just be sad to the point of breathlessness.
Reminder that self-diagnosing is cancer
And I know at least some of you do it
>>29259180
Self-diagnosing is a problem in some situations. Some people want explanations. Some people just realize their issues.
The former is a problem the latter is the path to a solution.
>>29259010
idk two metres of rope and a 101 guide book on how to make a noose?
>>29254698
Major Depression, possibly Schizotypal Personality Disorder.
Anyone could perhaps reassure me on the second one? Most symptoms apply I believe, but I'm ponderi if I'm looking in the wrong direction, per se. So does anyone perhaps know of anything in the likes of it?
>>29259212
don't those two things sometimes go hand in hand though?
>>29259256
Explanations and solutions? Well the issue is that if you just want an explanation you're religious.
If you want a solution you make sure it's right or at the very least attempt to disprove the explanation because you're focusing on the effect. The end goal wasn't the explanation so it's irrelevant to you on a personal level.
Then there's the case of being emotionally attached to the potential of a solution. But that's not relevant when talking about self-diagnosis. If you have a self diagnosis and want advice on how to solve it you can contact people for that.
I don't know what the fuck to call it but recently I started to see myself as "two different persons". It's really hard to explain but I'll try. So there is me, I just play vidya, hang out with friends and stuff, a normie. Than there is the "other me" who isn't in charge yet (I'll explain later), but gives me advice on stuff, gives me deadlines and explains how I work, like an observer. After I've lived out my "desires", like having friends, girlfriends, having fun, etc. he will take over me and start his plan without any kind of emotional setback because I've taken care of that by then. So the reason I'm normie now is that later he won't be held back human desires as I or we have already experienced them first hand. I hope you can understand what I'm saying it's kinda difficult.
The worst thing is that I can't decide anymore if I created him or he created me.
>>29254698
depersonalization disorder reporting in
my life is literal hell every day seems infinite
>>29259378
Sounds likeComplete bullshit some teen would make up because he's isolated and bored.I've done that since maybe 6-7It never leaves.
>>29254698
>tfw bipolar disorder
>ocd is tumblr tier
>girl in my class with OCD is the definition of tumblr
this fuking chart
>>29258697
I'm sorry, but this is my first time in one of these threads
>>29258859
I went there to stop myself from committing suicide. The staff was kind but not very helpful. What helped the most was talking to other patients.
>tfw all mental illness is Tumblr-tier
>>29259445
>knowing about someones disorders directly
Means they don't have them generally.
I wonder how compulsive lying compares to other mental illnesses. Actually, I'm living a life that isn't mine. I keep lying about myself and my past and present situation, and i have no control whatsoever over it. Also, I tell different people different things. So, sometimes, it's very hard to keep track. Of course It is impossible to develop meaningful relationships for a person with my condition, not to mention other repercussions which thankfully i have avoided so far. But still I find it very hard to speak truly.
I guess I might have an underlying problem, or mental illness, that is the root of my problem. but I have never been diagnosed.
>>29259378
sounds like you're roleplaying to me my man
>>29259409
Well at least someone else does it too, that makes me kinda relieved
>tfw paranoid schizophrenia and avoidant personality disorder
will the ride ever end
>>29254698
This chart is such shit that I was motivated to make my own.
I am a second-year graduate student training to be a psychologist, so I consider my knowledge of mental illness to be very comprehensive. Thoughts on my version? 2 hours in MS paint with a lot of revisions.
>>29254698
What's the difference between avoidant personality disorder and (social) anxiety disorder?
>>29259378
So you have a realistic self and a idealistic self seems pretty normal to me senpai.
I have anti social personality disorder. I'm a normie apparently with rich people problems. It's exactly like the picture shows. My life is perfect and I use my mental illness as a quirky personality trait to make me feel more special.
>>29259592
anxiety usually happens because you view people as better then you. While avoidant is hating people in general as you can't connect with them or dislike them.
>>29259588
>depersonalization
>moderate impact
How even?
It literally makes life unlivable. There's no reason to live with it.
How is it a moderate impact? The one thing I'm sitting here doing is waiting for a cure. If I could freeze myself I would no doubt.
medicated SSRI major depressive fuckup here
last year on 21/06 I had a miscarriage, the exact same thing happened on the same fucking day in 2012 as well. I want to have a baby so much, but it gets me so down I feel like committing. All of the other women in my family spread their legs and got pregnant, then carried the children to term. I'm talking all of my female cousins (there's 5 of them). They're all younger than me (I'm mid-20s).
I have no idea what to do with myself. I hate myself.
TL;DR rant rant rant babies rant
>>29259588
would you argue that in every single case someone with BPD or ASPD is a danger to society?
>>29259725
my best friend has BPD and she's not a danger to society. We get too drunk sometimes and cause a bit of noise but that's about it.
>>29259473
I'm a psych grad student...well graduating in a week or so.
they actually have diagnosed OCD
>>29259588
dahmer was definitely ASPD not borderline
>>29259759
As a psych grad, what do you think about compulsive lying? It is ruining my life and I can't even find reading material about it.
>>29259759
>they actually have diagnosed OCD
Doesn't mean they have it.
And if you were the person that diagnosed them then maybe don't graduate m80. For multiple reasons. Some which you should agree with some which are just mockery.
>>29259725
On average, they are. At the very least, a male with borderline will abuse his wife and children. Antisocial personality disorder actually requires killing small animals or being a bystander in a murder as criteria for diagnoses.
>>29259721
I know you think that your illness is so much worse than everyone else's, but how many people have been hurt by your condition? Have you been institutionalized? Probably not.
>>29259588
will save your chart and delete the last bar :^)
you're not being very
l g b t a f f i r m a t i v e
>>29259750
Notice the part where I specified MALEs with the disorder? Read the chart again more closely.
>>29259588
There's an inprovement over the last one but i sense a lot of your own personal opinion in there. I'm missing ocd from the chart and eating dissorders also.
btw what's factitious dissorder
>>29259784
possibly borderline, but what sort of stuff do you lie about?
sounds like a compulsive behavior and the general rule is behind every compulsion there is an obsessive anxiety. whether or not you have OCD, you definitely have crippling anxiety probably about your self-worth seeing how "the truth" is never good enough and you have to constantly make stuff up for your life to be meaningful
see a psychologist though, they could help you more than i can on r9k
>>29259807
all apologies, I misread. I've not met a man with BPD.
>>29259723
Girl, you need to chill.
Is a baby really going to help your situation? I mean REALLY think about it. Babies are nothing but 18 years of stress that drain you and your bank account. Fix your own head for the time being and fucking wait until you can make a rational decision. Don't make another robot.
>>29259790
sure faggot on r9k and probable underage b&, you definitely know a ton about this person you've never met
you need to learn to not think you know everything about shit you have no idea about
>>29259793
>but how many people have been hurt by your condition?
Anon I'm not sure you understand the issue here. It doesn't matter how many are hurt. Everyone else in the universe could be dead because of me or not it's irrelevant to my being.
I understand that since this is obviously the height of problem I have it's gonna seem like the most massive problem in the world. But I can't really imagine something more problematic because I do have 'lucid' moments where it's so obvious that I much much prefer pain over this. I lost my grandmother which I was close to and it just felt good in the sense that I preferred that over being as normal. I didn't realize at the time. I hadn't really gotten in touch with the issue but that was it.
Of course nobody is getting hurt. I don't matter at all. But that doesn't matter to me.
>>29256768
my therapist tells me that when i feel "in the moment" because i am "passionate" about something that should make me "feel real" again. also personally i find that distracting myself with vidya, animu and 4chan makes me almost not notice it at all because since i am so disconnected to my real self i can fully dive into these fictional worlds and experience them with the same feeling as the real world. there is a crude awakening though when you have to do something irl or when you try to get to sleep, since the derealization/depersonalization hits especially hard
>>29259817
Ocd and eating disorders are both on the list you dip.
Factitious disorder describes someone who fakes or exaggerates mental illness for personal gain or sympathy.
>>29259793
What separates Men from Women with BPD?
>>29259793
man i hope your not the psych grad who made the chart but i bet you are
>>>29259721
I know you think that your illness is so much worse than everyone else's, but how many people have been hurt by your condition? Have you been institutionalized?
i've been institutionalized, and whether or not someone is paying enough attention to someone to get them help is not a way to judge severity of disorders
>>29259885
i meant to not quote your text, i meant to keep talking to >>29259793 sorry
literally the exact opposite of what i was trying to say
>>29259864
The chart is specifically arranged by impact on society. If you want to make your own based on impact on the sufferer's own happiness, then please do. This chart is arranged based on how many others are harmed by your condition. It says that in the top right corner. Jesus I'm getting so many replies from people who didn't even read the whole damn thing.
>>29259759
Hey man how would explain extreme alternations between depression and euphoria in a time space of say a couple of hours or minutes even? i've also had delussions that have had quite a big inpact on my life this past year. Does this seem like bpd to you? male btw
>>29259793
I have anti social personality disorder. I never killed any animals or was involved in any murder.
stop being dumb
>>29259922
Society and the induvidual.
Why is the chart even placed there?
Why is society a factor at all? they all vary between none to absolutely massive.
>>29259835
it's ruining my life. I'd give anything to have children.
I got the implant put in like a week after it happened last year to stop any more miscarriages from happening. So I'm safe from making irrational decisions as it currently is aha (they won't take it out unless it fucks up spectacularly). I've been in and out of hospital getting scans and shit to be told my womb's wonky as fuck. I guess it's nature's way of telling me I need to be more stable, ah.
Sorry for ranting anon, I tend to go on.
Thanks for making me think about it tho, I do feel a bit better about the situation.
>>29258616
Different anon but I also have both and I think my depersonalization is a product of social phobia and in turn being depersonalized makes social situations worse as you can't relate to others at all and most interaction just makes me feel more alienated. So it's a cycle really.
>>29259934
just a guess Bipolar rapid cycling untreatable without medication and a psychiatrist, it's really rough and people are institutionalized quite often with it, more common in women
BPD is borderline personality disorder not bipolar disorder btw
but yeah see a psych like asap if it's fucking up your life
>>29259884
Women are often controlling and blotchy. They also self harm.
Men go through phases of lacking empathy and bottling negative emotions until they lose control. I would know. I was institutionalized because I have it and I beat my own mother to the edge of her life. Testosterone and BPD don't mix.
>>29259885
So you honestly think you are more or ad much of a drain on society as a paranoid schizophrenic?
>>29259979
depersonalization usually is a result of trauma
>>29259850
Ok so you're not even answering. Perhaps you noticed that it was quite the elaborate answer? If you look at her and say "yeah that's OCD". Then you're clearly not fit to gradutate.
If you take her word for it you're not fit to graduate. If you know her doctor or have very very good reason to believe her then yes you're in the clear.
But you didn't even support the claim in any way. So either you're a psych who doesn't find it interesting at all or you're full of shit.
I'm 23 by the way. I don't see why you'd assume I'm underage from that comment. At least pick on something like capitalization and spelling.
>>29254698
there is a man i know with OSD and clinical depression that i fucking hate!
He is inept and assertive, but also weak in the inside. He acts like a ASSHOLE and i wish i could punch that fucker in the face to burst his fucking world which by the way is dependent on everyones effort.
Here are some some things that bursts my bubble:
1. He is inept and assertive,and therefore act in very naiv ways.
2. He acts smart sometimes but really is normal, and GETS FUCKING CREDIT
3. He is spoiled and retracts to authority becuase of that.
4. He is a leftie and therefore nearly survives on a victim complex provided by nice/boring people and his hardworking parents. His politics are a passive call to prefered authority (and that leads nobody outside of me hearing the outrageus things) and CONSTANTLY does virtue signaling.
5. He is called nice and open but really is discusting, his parents know that and its linkedd with his depression.
There is more guys but i just cant write more,
How do i leave a asshole when having him among good freinds?
>>29260001
>So you honestly think you are more or ad much of a drain on society as a paranoid schizophrenic?
literally never said that, zip up your fly your paranoid schizophrenia is showing (by the way DSM 5 they got rid of the "paranoid" qualifier)
>>29259827
Generally speaking, I twist the truth to suit my fantasies. It started really manifesting when I was a young teen, I basically lied about doing a shit load of drugs. Than it got worse and I started inventing insane stories surrounding myself, usually they don't make me look either bad or good they are just, well, more interesting than me. I also lie about meaningless things constantly, lying is my natural response to any question. no matter how inane.
I don't feel anything when I lie, no guilt, since I have no control over it. I try not to think about it. But sometimes when i get home in the evening i think about the things i said during the day and i feel just awful, mostly because i'm afraid someone will find out. which, lets face it, they probably have, but no one cares either way.
I am very troubled by it, especially since I am studying to become a lawyer, and I am afraid my condition will interfere with my professional life.
I think, objectively, I'm probably a pretty O.K. guy, i mean no harm to anyone. So I really don't know why I am so compelled to keep doing what i am doing.
Unfortunately, I can't see a therapist since im a broke af student.
>>29259965
Ok now you're just not making sense in your posts. Society obviously matters more than the individeal. UNLESS you're a selfish piece of shit, which I can tell you are.
>>29260013
his parents tried to send him help.
>>29260005
>I'm 23 by the way. I don't see why you'd assume I'm underage from that comment
because i've only met children who think they know about people they don't know, but you might just have a lot of issues
>you're not fit to graduate
you honestly shouldn't be a therapist if you're a grad student and think that trans people should kill themselves and you assume as much as you do from an r9k post
you are going to hurt a lot of people as a therapist, i can tell already
>>29260013
>>29260045
im autistc btw, thats why i joined thread
>>29260029
But you implied it by saying that your disorder should be lower on the list. I'm not schizophrenic. The next spot on the list below your disorder is where schizophrenia is. Do you really think you belong there?
>>29258533
these lists are inaccurate.
on the dissociative scale it goes DP/DR - > borderline -> dissociative identity disorder
>>29260035
look for free clinics around you bud, there usually are a bunch if you're in a city
>>29260001
Would you base your own actions as a bottom line for every man with BPD though? My best friend since we were very young has BPD and we share everything pretty much and I can't ever recall him being abusive to anyone, he often takes time alone, sometimes for weeks just to let it all out with no one around.
>>29260086
oh i see what's happening here
i copied another guys post trying to quote him and accidentally replied to you and tried to tell you in the next post i misclicked
sorry about that
>>29260101
I am not from the US, or the EU.
Basically you can't get free mental care in my country since they cut funding. I will probably just have to wait until i have enough money to pay.
>>29259984
i know i just read that mood swings in bipolar tend to occur over a spam of months rather than days or hours and that the later more of a caracteristic of bpd
>>29260120
Then he has something called quiet borderline. It's a different version from classic borderline, which is the acting out kind.
>beyond-hope tier
>schizophrenia
I do fine on my meds
>>29260148
oh gotcha, borderline is a whole different thing whose main issues are attachment and vindictiveness towards people
the mood stuff immediately sounds like rapid cycling, but without actually being your therapist there's no way to really tell which one
(rapid cycling)
http://www.dbsalliance.org/site/PageServer?pagename=education_brochures_bipolar_disorder_rapid_cycling
BPD
http://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topics/borderline-personality-disorder/index.shtml
of course you probably already saw the second one
>>29260059
>you are going to hurt a lot of people as a therapist, i can tell already
Who said I was gonna be one? It's flattering you'd think that I'd qualify in this discussion but I'm in CS.
>assume a lot from a post
You assume a lot from a source that's unreliable aswell anon. Again. I asked for you to assert your position and you couldn't even do that. Do you know from her or from a doctor?
>trans people should kill themselves
Perhaps you're confusing me with someone. Seems likely. Never said that.
But I think trans people should probably consider more deeply considering how relatively common it is. Perhaps there's more societal stuff to do to prevent this than having therapy or whatever (i dunno) is put into place for people with gender dismorphia.
I've watched some TV (yes, the ultimate source for factual information) and the people presented just seem very focused on advantages in some sense. It's not like when you look at religious people who make religion a major part of their identity. They don't wear it in the same way.
I don't know how to act now.
Guys, it is normal to act careless when you see mum crying about how irresponsible you are? She break up in front on me. And at that moment, i tried hard to not laugh at her.
Something is really fucked up this year. I'm too honesty. Uknowingly i say vicious words to somebody I really care. I can't say if my words harm them.
My empathy is bad. I need a help, but I'm scared. What if my family discover this? What if they discover I'm copying their expressions?
I'm discovering my desires to hurt someone, care or not. I'm exposing their weak spots and use them in the most extreme case.
I have no motivation to do something with myself, to get up and make my shit together. I feel no inner strenght inside myself. I thought that books and friends makes me feel better, but nothing changed. My deep interest is now dull...
It is bad? Can someone tell me, what to do?
>>29260201
If you don't know that a rapid cycling pattern of bipolar is developed after years of having regular bipolar 1, then I really hope you aren't already graduating. What he is describing is cyclothymia.
>>29260238
>And at that moment, i tried hard to not laugh at her.
What was so funny about it anon? Please. I need a good laugh.
>>29260220
>Who said I was gonna be one? It's flattering you'd think that I'd qualify in this discussion but I'm in CS.
oh thank god, i thought you were the new chart maker
tl;dr except your first sentence, your autism is safe in code
>>29260238
I'm sorry to inform you that you suffer from "Third World Intelligence Disorder." Intelligence is often linked to empathy outside of being a sociopath, so youre probably just an idiot shitskin.
>>29260286
>autism
Dunno anon. I'm a bit uncertain. I ran the hypothetical with the guy who did my psychoanalisys and basically all he concluded was that because I had learnt to deal with gestures and how to interpret facial expressions I don't qualify for autism.
But I've certainly had difficulties growing up that would be connected and it runs in the family. So maybe you're just amazing at this and I'm wrong.
>>29260281
Her whining about why I have only one sock out of pair. There so many pairs of socks, where's only one piece. And I don't know, where the fuck are they.
Man, this was fcking funny.
>>29260324
Glad to hear that I'm normal person. Thanks.
>>29260286
>being this triggered by me not putting your disorder further down on the chart besides the fact that it is objectively not as detrimental to the people around you as if you were schizophrenic or a sociopath
You probably have histrionic personality disorder. You are a tripfag (seeking recognition) and think that your own suffering is worse than everyone else's, even though statistics show worse outcomes for people with bipolar 1 and schizophrenia.
>>>/t/umblr
>>29259721
>It literally makes life unlivable. There's no reason to live with it.
Then why haven't you killed yourself?
http://healthresearchfunding.org/21-interesting-depersonalization-disorder-statistics/
"50% of all adults in the United States will suffer from at least 1 or 2 depersonalization disorder attacks over the course of their lifetime."
Sorry to inform you, but you are not special. You are being a massive bitch if you think your dissociation is on par with a psychotic break.
>go to first day of "day hospital program" for people with psychosis
>sit in the corner
>it's time to start
>a doctor comes and thinks i'm someone else, taking me aside and asking me weird questions
>everyone is gone to group therapy
>take this chance to take the elevator down and go home
I'm not going to go again. Hopefully I don't get in trouble for this.
Tomorrow I'll lose control over my own money. Thanks to my addiction I just kept gambling all my money away even if I won I just can't stop. So my therapist decided it would be best if someone else handles my money. Feel like I've failed at adulthood
>>29260567
>depersonalization disorder attacks
Yet my problem is that the last feel I had was in February. Before then it was august I think.
I don't care if it's special or not. I'd give both my legs to get rid of it.
>>29254698
24/7 depersonalization disorder here, had for 2 and a half years. To people who are new to it, yes it does get better, even if it doesn't go away.
Also I'd consider things like major depression and shizophrenia high up the list. Depersonalization is maybe the worst thing that has ever happened to me, but I think it shouldn't be beyond hope considering it doesn't affect ones behavior that much.
Pretty sure I have BPD. Most of the time I have little emotion but I can cycle between every emotion in the space of an hour, all at maximum intensity. For example, from neutral to suicidal to jubilant and back. I've been reading about schema modes and this describes me perfectly.
I'm pretty sure I know the root of my problems. Once while tripping I called my gf "mom", and another time I had a strong urge to call an older male friend "dad". I also had a series of abusive friendships between 6 and 14.
I've experienced two "glitches in the Matrix" today. I'm sure I fed my dog a couple of hours ago but earlier when I went in his room I noticed the bowl was missing and found it in the kitchen with his food in it. Just a moment ago I went to let him in from the yard but he's right next to me.
social anxiety and depression
and an unfortunate personality
Why don't governments offer euthanasia for long term mental illness instead of making us jump through infinite hoops to get welfare benefits?
>>29254698
>tfw ocd and obsessed with thoughts of me or loved ones going to hell
>>29254698
How is ASPD normie exactly?
>>29261207
That's a slippery slope. Eventually it would be not be a choice.
JUST TO CLEAR IT UP FOR YOU FAGGOTS.
Depersonalization has got nothing to do with personality or how you act. Depersonalization warps your reality, you are sane for the most part but you feel disconnected from your body and your surroundings in a dream like state.
Don't pile social anxiety and other bullshit with this disorder, even though it is a little to do with certain anxiety.
Most if not all of the time for people who truly have it 24/7 is either a result of trauma, major stress or drug use.
Get your facts straight tumblr-fags.
Also It gets better over time, therefore it shouldn't be in the beyond hope tier, it's easily curable with a good diet, exercise and keeping busy after a while, even though at first it's hell on earth.
>>29261223
>loving people
found the problem
>>29254698
Horray for depersonalization disorder!
I'm not beyond hope, it just feels like my hands aren't mind sometimes
>>29259977
No problem. Ranting is fine as long as you learn something from it, which it seems you have. That's good.
I'm not a doctor, so take this as you will. You obviously got a bit of baby fever, which is being pressured by everyone around you. Fuck them. You're obviously not ready, and it doesn't sound like it's going to happen anyway. If you're also worried that you'll never have a kid, you can always get a surrogate. Just don't jump into this.
Enjoy your goddamn life as much as you can, and if you can't, then don't bring a kid into your misery. Make your shit better before you bring a kid into it.
>>29254698
Dissociative identity disorder and depersonalization disorder are both tumblr-tier. I'm incredibly surprised that nobody has pointed this out yet. If you do a quick google search you'll find tons of tumblr posts and general SJW-type people talking about when they dissociate or depersonalize. It's such a common thing that they make memes about it.
I'm probably much too late to this thread to be able to make any impact but if you read this and you have any doubts, just do a quick search.
>>29261291
is hell real? i can deal with anything as long as i know that i did my best and that death is the end. i don't want to exist forever.
>>29261159
>Pretty sure I have
Stop. Just stop right there. Don't self diagnose. Go see a doctor if you actually think there's something wrong. Let them decide. That doesn't mean drink the koolaid, but get a proper Diagnosis.
>>29261159
Just had another glitch. I got up to check how much food he ate and realised that I don't remember him eating it (he always licks me when he's done eating) but the bowl is empty and now I'm not entirely sure I fed him at all. And I still think he should be outside because I remember letting him out but not letting him back in. Wtf.
>>29259793
Never been institutionalized and might not even have anything but ive abused animals quite a bit in my life. Also you don't really need to kill them to be institutionized if I told a psychiatrist some of the things I've done I would probably be labeled with the psychopath meme.
>>29261255
I think euthanasia would be less suffering than the humiliating bullshit that you have to go through to prove you're poor and sick enough to get benefits if your situation is not likely to ever get better.
>>29254698
Body integrity identity disorder should be in tumblr-tier
Where does schizoid personality disorder fall?
>>29261410
I forgot to mention OCD is normie-tier. Every other normalfag claims to have it.
ASPD should also be in beyond hope-tier depending on your background.
>>29257958
Because BPD is way more prevalent in females than males and is specifically common in tumblr types.
Most girls with BPD fit at least part of the tumblrina stereotype pretty well, whether they actually go on tumblr or not
>>29261402
Once you're finished you're set for life. I for one am happy with it. A few months of annoyance for a lif etime of state sponsored neet dom. It's not the end of the world.
>>29259793
>Antisocial personality disorder actually requires killing small animals or being a bystander in a murder as criteria for diagnoses
You're confusing ASPD with warning signs for future serial killers or rapists. Most people with ASPD aren't violent - they're just shitty people.
>tfw turbo-manlet and clinically diagnosed with BPD and bipolar disorder
Just kill me
>>29261436
Every other normalfag claims to have it, but they don't actually have it. People with legitimate OCD, not "hurr I like to organize my desk i'm so OCD xP" can be pretty debilitated by it.
Obviously it varies from person to person but I've been diagnosed with OCD, panic disorder, and major depressive disorder for over 2 years now and the OCD used to not bother me at all in comparison to the other 2 but now it way overshadows both my anxiety and depression. I would literally give up everything I own just to get all of these thoughts out of my head and make myself stop doing the things that I can't fucking stop doing
>>29254698
From what I have personally experienced people tend to have general "constellations" of mental disorders, because you can label something as one specific disorder based on the symptoms, though they might describe a number of different disorders.
I have bipolar type II (also described as cyclothymia or circadian rhythm sleep disorder) and borderline personality disorder (also described as complex post traumatic stress disorder or hypersensitivity).
I also have dyscalculia and show symptoms of psychosis during my manic episodes. I've also had episodes of depersonalization and was also described once as either having social anxiety or being schizotypal because shit is all the same.
Pic related is my Tumblr oppression points.
>>29258444
lithium
geodon
clonopin
>>29258320
>abilify
>propanalol
For Schizophrenia.
They took away my fucking clonazepam because I was "abusing it". Assholes.
Having literally perfect mental and physical health is the most important thing in this life. If you niggas have mental issues you should try doing sports, excersice and eat healthy, and if it really doesnt work you should be medicated with pills or whatever, on a daily basis, for the rest of your lives.
Has anyone here been sectioned before?
Or whatever the equivalent is in your country.
OCD+Autism. Wish I could get rid of it. Not going to whine like a bitch here about it though.
I'm curious if there are real depersonalisation anons here. So you're like Norman Bates? Can't imagine that level of fucked up. What effect does it have on your life? Are you currently locked up?
I finally got an acid guy in early April. It's cheaper than ever for me and always available, needless to say I've been doing it once every 2-5 days for the past 2 months.
Lately I've been so paranoid that the cops know I'm doing it and that every person I meet in day to day life is in deep cover as a special field agent. I also think that I'm getting coded messages from the force holding together the universe telling me things about the future.
I'm also getting extremely introverted.
Did I fuck myself up and give myself mental illness? Last use was Saturday for reference.
>>29261793
4 times, 2 different hospitals.
It's not that bad, really. Just boring.
>>29261793
They stole my shoes and I never got them back
>>29261837
Stop using LSD and if it doesn't go away after 2 months, congratulations you have schizophrenia.
>>29261837
>once every 2-5 days for the past 2 months
You're literally retarded and don't know how to drop acid if you're doing it that often.
>>29261930
Does that sound like psychosis or schiz. to you? I'm pretty concerned about it after just noticing those symptoms. Saturday was my last day before I take a very long break.
But thinking that the car behind me is full of federal agents on my case because of eating blotter, and convincing myself I'm right and jumping from situation A to B to conclusion Z is definitely not normal. I've always been kind of a weird guy but this is taking it to a whole new level. I worry I'll have to take myself out if I don't return to my version of normality soon.
Well I have depersonalization disorder had it ever since my ex killed her self in front of me 3 years ago feels bad man
>>29261326
Hell is for people who didn't want goodness and Godliness, so they don't get it. In Catholic theology, one must die outside of a state of grace, they must have committed a mortal sin without subsequent repentance. A mortal sin requires grave matter, full consent of the will and with full knowledge of the gravity of the offense and the circumstances in which the sin was committed.
>>29261989
I know I am. I'm impulsive as fuck and feel like if the drug in question won't kill me or damage my body physically I have nothing to worry about. But this stuff is making me go real mental. I haven't had a single bad trip and have been taking anywhere from 3-7 tabs every use (450ug-1.2mg). I only use it with friends and always have an amazing time but the paranoia and worry is bleeding into my sober life.
>>29262082
Yes, that is psychosis.
Schizophrenia just means you have had psychosis a lot of times, for a long time. I think it's for either a mont hstraight or two months or something like that.But you being on LSD means it's not schizophrenia yet, untill you've been off drugs for awhile, if you continue to be psychotic then you may be schizophrenic.
>>29262082
you're self-aware right now, which is good
you can handle this anon
>>29254698
im a normie
nooo
yay
nooo
>>29261793
No. I nearly was once but talked my way out of it even though I was pretty fucked up. I am a good actor sometimes. Made it all look like a misunderstanding. Long story. Irrelevant too.
I fear if I ever do I'll want to stay sectioned because I've heard it's like being back in a school environment minus the normies.
>>29262486
Only friends I've had in 10 years were in hospital.
I miss it sometimes. Even planned on stopping my meds and seeing if that would bring me back.
i don't think i have Alzheimer being that I am so young(19). but can anyone help me with this. is anything wrong?
sometimes i will forget the dates of events, family/school mates(no friends) names, things in my past, and general knowledge(i usually have to teach myself some math equations that i should know after a long period of not doing it).
i dont remember really anything i have done in my past(except for the obvious like being online since i'm reminded every day by being on) but other than that i won't remember.
for example a family member might ask if i remember going on a vacation or doing something with them and i kinda have to fake remember to not make it awkward.
I also ask people the same questions or tell them the same stories within the same day.
those are just some examples of how i can't remember stuff. is there something wrong?
>>29262564
Just sounds like you have a bad memory.
>tfw schizophrenia runs in the family
>uncle has been in the hospital for the last twenty years due to his schizophrenia
>feel myself slowly getting consumed
Who else here is psychotic? How do your hallucinations look or sound? How do you think it started?
>Be 15
>Smoke a blunt of spice with a friend
>go full zombie mode and lay down in the middle of the sidewalk
>hearing weird high-pitched voices the whole time
>doesn't bother me, it's just the drug right?
Fast forward about a year and a half
>stoner, smoking hash for the first time
>notice a lot of warping around, as per usual with psychedelics
>walk into the bathroom to take a piss
>hear a clear voice saying "he's pissing"
>look out the window, look around for windows
>hear another voice say "he's looking for us"
>a little freaked but still not bothered, doesn't even occur to me that it's early psychosis
About a year later
>Try magic mushrooms
>shits great, so i do it once a month for 3 months
>after that the voices have become unbearable
>They take the form of people i know or have seen
>I start to believe that this is a weird telepathic network that i just discovered
>start acting bizarre, having random impulses
>when people are talking around me, i assume they're talking about me and how im such a loser
>start raping women in my mind while masturbating and hearing the voices beg me to stop
>my parents tell me that im adopted or that they never really loved me in my mind
>friends and girls who crushed on me all gave me reasons why they hate me
Thankfully I've had very little visual hallucinations thus far, if I take acid do you think they will show up?
Another question, if the psychotic symptoms are chronic, does that make me Schizophrenic?
>>29262262
>>29262300
I mainly have noticed my thinking is getting a little bit different. Definitely not how I seemed prior to my heavy psych use.
Does hallucinogen psychosis have permanent effects or fade over time? None of my family/relatives has any mental illness besides alcoholism and depression/anxiety. I enjoy acid more than anything else but I'm trying to think about how using it will set me back that much more from my return to normality. As well as worrying that the next time might be the beginning of the time bomb of nuttery.
It's always interesting to me about how psychedelics affect the mind. I suppose I'll find out soon enough
>>29254698
>DID
>real
Pick one and only one.
It's not real
>>29259588
>autism
>not having a moderate impact on quality of life
Really?
>>29263166
At my worst? Demons speaking to me through writing on the wall. "You're going to die" etc. Like, I could see it being written. Then I thought I was dead. Nurses with demon faces coming in to torture me with pitchforks. It was fucked. Inanimate objects with faces, talking to me. Had a long conversation about m yescape from hell with the fire alarm and heating vents on my ceiling.
Less severe stuff? Generally just hearing voices, seeing faces. I haven't been psychotic in awhile now. Abilify works but it makes me feel like shit and I'm not sure if the trade off is wroth it. Considering going off it.
It started one day just out of the blue. Faces everywhere and demons writing things. I went to the hospital before I was long gone. Thought the security guard at the hospital killed me and cut my leg off. They put me in an elevator (locking room). And I was going down and down. And there was a map transposed on the floor and I stepped on them. It was the earth. ANd I was killing all the people on the map by stepping on them. And that made the eleavtor go down lower. The demons ordered me to strip naked as soon as I got in there so I was tip toeing around all naked. I must have looked nuts. It's weird looking back at that shit.
>>29255368
the naxalone in subs don't get absorbed sublingually / orally. youd have to shoot it which is a bad idea even if youre a piece of shit junkie
Anyone else feel DISGUSTED by the mentality in threads like these?
People - you're not your diagnosis. It's not, and it shouldn't be, your identity. You post about it like you're proud, or like it's a competition.
I hate society's romanticizing over mental illnesses. "Schizophrenia, how cool???" "I stayed a while at a psych ward, I'm so messed up lol." And the majority of you do it entirely unironically, you don't even notice. Question yourself why you write and talk about this shit. What's your purpose? Why do you want to share? What's the end goal?
I seriously struggle to come up with something more pathetic than all of this.
What's the best antidepressant?
>>29264685
A noose around your neck
>>29254698
any of you guys have shit doctors? I have one who just bitches at me and to my dad because he asks some questions and I have no idea how to answer them so I just say i don't know
