ITT: we write a book, comment by comment. when we have a decent sized set of data, i post it on amazon for free or like a dollar
>>29164115
"I fucking hate normies." the man thought to himself as he watched a laughing couple sit on the bench across him.
He pulled out his damp sock and inhaled deeply and smiled to himself, knowing what was going to happen next.
The man preceded to furiously masturbate to the trap hentai he has on his phone for some fucking retarded reason
>>29164115
Is gud pengin.original senpai
The smell of damp sock brought the man back to the humid jungles of the Mekong Delta, he could still feel the rifle in his hand, even though it was probably in some supply depot by now, covered in dust. He could still hear the whispers of those fucking gooks all around him, could still feel the intestines of his sergeant splattering across him as he stepped on a rigged 155mm round, he could still taste the copper from the bloody nose he got in a bar fight in Saigon. He had been stateside for some 14 years, but somehow never left vietnam
he wondered aloud to himself how long it would be before Islam completely obliterated western society
But he realized the true collapse will be at the hands of Jews and East Asians.
>>29164416
visiting /pol/ to seek an answer
He then decided to get up and approach the couple, stuffing his trusty sock in his back pocket.
The man interrupted all current activities, grabbed his cock, and remembered that he was not very well endowed (small penis). He sobbed quietly to himself as he remembered his useless member.
>>29164441
While slowly making his way to the couple, he glanced at a woman dressed in a lightly colored sundress sitting on the edge of the fountain, staring at the couple with a look of held back melancholy partially masked by her auburn hair.
Her auburn hair reminded him of the hair surrounding his tiny COCK and how small it looked, especially in a forest of pubes. For shame.
He then scratched his chin and remembered he didn't wash his face that past week. Shrugging, the man approached the girl at the fountain, sat next to her heavily and took out his gameboy
She approached him from behind and started rubbing his nipples. The loud noise he was echoing reminded her of youth spent in Florida listening frog sounds under starry sky.
He came instantly, and started farting.
She laid her eggs in a cluster on the ground and withered away.
He was a Grandpa
>>29164499
The man eyeballed the girl, wondering if she was waifu material. A 6'2 man in sunglasses came around the other side of the fountain, and grabbed her soft ass, She squeeled "Oh Chad!" in a playful manner. Chad kissed her on the lips, then grabbed her ass again and they walked off down the park path. The autistic, /pol/ack vietnam vet got up off the bench, grabbed some rocks off the park ground, and put them in his damp sock. He got up and snuck up behind Chad and the beautiful girl, letting out an earsplitting "REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE" as he brought the weapon down on Chad, shattering his skull and killing him instantly. The woman screamed a bloodcurdling cry and started sobbing, while the man put his arms behind him and ran off into the bushes like they do in anime, because he was convinced that it made him faster. He hid, squatting in the bushes, much like the Viet cong that hunted him many years ago, while he heard the police sirens wailing as they got closer. He was ready for this challenge.
Come to /r9k/, it like reddit but with fresher yet more dank memes!
Come to /r9k/, it like reddit but with fresher yet more dank memes!
Come to /r9k/, it like reddit but with fresher yet more dank memes!
Come to /r9k/, it like reddit but with fresher yet more dank memes!
Meanwhile, on the other side of the park was a woman walking her dog. She was morbidly obese, with pink hair and piercings. She huffed with every step and thought to herself, 'Fuck the patriarchy.'
The woman's dog was a vicious and white pitbull.
Pitbulls are the niggers of dogs. Take note.
The severely overweight woman noticed the attractive woman sitting quietly near the man, and with vigor conjured up from her various fat reserves she quickly hobbled over to the two, pitbull in tow.
"M-Muh curves," she bellowed, her face red and sweaty.
The autistic Vietnam veteran man watched it all from his hideout. From another direction, the police were getting closer and closer to him.
Suddenly his phone rang.
Her comment interrupted the internal reminiscing of the girl; she turned to look at the source. She gave a look of mild confusion at what was in front of her, as the very fat woman's posture and her somewhat raggedy dog contrasted the lightly humid environment around the center of the park.
It can also be argued that DNA is nothing more than a program designed to preserve itself. Life has become more complex in the overwhelming sea of information. And life, when organized into species, relies upon genes to be its memory system. So, man is an individual only because of his intangible memory... and memory cannot be defined, but it defines mankind. The advent of computers, and the subsequent accumulation of incalculable data has given rise to a new system of memory and thought parallel to your own. Humanity has underestimated the consequences of computerization.
The man grabbed his phone, threw it on the ground, and shat himself. The warmth of his now soiled undergarments gave him confidence to take on the police.
>>29165175
Little did he know that his feces were infected with extraterrestrial parasites which, now that they have been freed from their fleshy prison, were ready to go into phase two of their life cycle, and they began to grow exponentially in his pants.
This man had unknowingly wrought an invasion upon the earth.
>>29164396
the man is awoken from his sickening, yet nostalgic day dream as his feet are kicked by a passerby.
"fucking bum"
The passerby,a man in his forties wearing a business suit walks away without another word.
The man lets out a sigh as he sinks into the wall of the liquor store he was resting against.
"Right. this is my life now."
He doesn't say this. He keeps repeating it in his thoughts until the sun sets over the city, and he is sent into oblivion.
>>29165499
Yeah, that's me alright. Want to know how I ended up here? That's a long story.. But it all begins with my trip to Luxembourg.
>>29165851
A storm swept through our route on the way, forcing our pilot to switch routes. I remember the intense turbulence, how it shook me to my soul and reminded me just how vulnerable and exposed I was. When it cleared up, I felt completely safe... And then the collision happened.
WAKE MEME UP
WAKE MEME UP INSIDE
CANT WAKE UP
>>29165928
I can still remember my fear when the bigger plane flew above us. A series of masked men attached our plane to theirs with steel cables and preceded to break our plane in two.
>>29165944
AHAHHAAHHHAHHAAHAHHAHAAHHAA
Suddenly a mysterious midget walks up to the man, breaking him away from his thoughts.
"You do realise the police is chasing you?" he squeaked, his grotesque body clad in a bikini
Mousham
>>29166035
"Who the fuck are you?" the man asked. "My name is Putin, Vladimir Putin" the gnome replied "but friends call me Vladlet". He proceeded to dance around in circles signing some weird song to -in his words "bring the Ruble back up". It didn't seem to work, because Vladlet checked his phone with a sad face and walked on.
>>29166102
The man reluctantly activated his invisibility cloak, so cringey interruptions like that wouldn't happen anymore.
He recalled how masked men entered his plane with flashlights, scanning the faces of almost every terrified passenger, except him of course.
>>29166211
Because he had no face at all. A solid wall of flesh stood where sensory organs and orifices could normally be found.
>>29166237
Of course this isn't how he appeared to the outsiders. He usually walked around in his magical mask of chadness, so he could live a relatively normal life as a young, attractive fellow named Chad.
>>29166339
No one cared who he was until he put on the mask.
>>29166339
and by "chadness" I mean "Guy Fawkes".
>>29164115
nigger nogger asshole clogger
nigger nogger asshole clogger
nigger nogger asshole clogger
nigger nogger asshole clogger
>>29166368
he then an hereord onto a stacy who fell over
>>29166387
"s-s-s-sorry" said the man, as he showed his true face to the girl.
When stacy realized who the man was, she, with a tone of disgust in her voice, said:
>>29166411
"woah dude, where's your face?"
"I like penises and men" replied the guy, who was ever so subtly stroking his shaft.
>>29166419
"I may not have have a face, but I have three dicks" Three penises popped out of the flesh wall, each with a different statue, color, and state of excitement.
>>29166467
The man's dragondildos fell to the ground though and exposed his little stump.
>>29166502
"Th this isn't what it seems, i swear" spoke the man nerviously.
Stacey, seeing the nude manlet who was in front of her, proceded to get her phone out to call the police.She was obviusly a victim of rape. When the police answered the phone, she began shouting:
>>29166502
"Eww, I'm getting the eff out of here," Said the snarky stacey.
"Wait, I can make it bigger!" Replied the blob of flesh. In a moment of determination, he plumped the stubby chode up with blood and flesh, inflating it to a comparatively proud six inches.
The man realized he had a special talent, if only he could learn to put it to use when he wasn't horny.
>>29166467
Stacy stumbled backwards. "So it was you all along, Tri-Wielder from the sixth dimension. I've heard much about you. In fact, I was sent to capture you." Her previous expression of shock was now replaced with a devious grin.
Her face began to warp and gurgle, her features slowly disappearing into the gaping boipussy that took their place.
"Suction, ON!", she farted out from her smooth and notably hairless, gaping hole. Like a vacuum cleaner, she sucked the man's face-dicks into her into her facial sphincters and then squeezed, draining the man of his semen reserves and, therefore also, his life energy.
She pushed a button on her watch, attempting to warp out to her native dimension, still latched onto the man's meat rods, but then-
>>29166553
The phone was so loud that the man could clearly here the policeman saying "Why are you calling us? We are standing right next to you."
Also, by this point it's probably useful to mention that the man's name was Bart. Bart had been a professional NEET and arcanine shitposter for over a decade and was very proud of this status.
>>29166634
Stacey straddled the plump penis, riding it like the dirty whore she is. She completely forgot about the cops next to her, who were completely disgusted by the wall of flesh, or WOF for short.
Wof scooted over to the chad mask, put it on, and his flesh transformed into the 19-year-old adonis named Chad. He pulled Chad's cock out of the whore stacey, and did a kung-foo move on the cuck officers who just stared in shock.
>>29166666
>>29166666
>>29166666
>>29166666
Nice repeating numbers Anon
oregonono
>>29166666
"Nice pents", Bart said, smoothing his slickly oiled hair with his hand.
You are not reading a book. You are in a coma.
>>29166720
"I could be reading a book in a coma, the two aren't mutually exclusive", anon retorted with a snort. While he did so, he could hear that faint rhythm of the Evanescence song "Bring Me To Life" echoing within his skull, with flashes of skeleton chairs appearing in the peripheries of his vision.
>>29166747
Anon sighs. This book is really just a huge mess, he thinks. Maybe it's just the begining? He flips a hundred pages ahead and gasps at what he sees:
>>29166797
He sees a picture of himself reading the book, and underneath that a caption that reads the word "Faggot", and nothing more.
In a single brief moment, the fart was over. What I described had been a very romantic description of a fart. A fart that I had unleashed in this world unprepared, unwilling, my ass, filling.
I dont want an enema, but despite all that Im going to stab my own thighs with a pencil and hope that I get a lead poisoning.
Chad walks down the street, high fiving his friends. He is the most popular freshmen in school, but his life gets turned upside down when his girlfriends stacey discovers his startling secret: He is actually a living, breathing, wall of flesh.
This summer, coming to a theater near you:
>>29166837
The little men inside the pencil sighed. "Time to get to work", they all thought, and although in their culture punctuality and a strong work ethic were considered virtues to be upheld, truthfully every single one of them was disheartened at having to leave their long, silent vacation behind, though they all put on the pretense of enjoying themselves and their profession like a pack of jolly dwarves all the same.
Bart suddenly awoke in his room.
"Whoa, what a dream," he thought, struggling to get up like a hippo stuck in a swamp. He wanted to scratch his balls and yet discovered that he was still wearing his trenchcoat.
He reached into the back pocket of his pants and discovered his sock- filled with rocks!
Or were they cocks? His vision was blurry, and he stumbled out of his sweat-stained bed. Upon closer inspection, he realised his foot-blanket was filled with tiny penises, made out of granite, screaming in the milk-filled void of his sock.
He then ran out in public and screamed "NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER" over and over again while exposing his penis to children and parents.
He decided to make breakfast in the kitchen but he was all out of cereal. He goes to find his sister to ask where the cereal is but he finds her in her room asleep with her boyfriend. The man feels his anger building up quickly and feels an urge to release it.
"Whyyy did you dooo this to usssss", they hissed collectively, like a single dying snake with many voices.
Bart wondered if he was still dreaming, or if this was the true reality he had been hiding from all along.
Wof removed his bart mask and rubbed the tiny penises all over his skin, clogging them into his pores so he could shoot them out later.
Suddenly there was a knock on his door. Wof put the bart mask back on to open it, and was shocked at what he saw
>>29167109
There was a big penis in the doorway, covered in socks full of tiny Wofs in Bart masks. All of them were making high pitched squeals in agony- or was it ecstatic pleasure? Wof couldn't tell.
There, standing at his door, was the SJW he saw in his dream (Was it really a dream?).
She smelled faintly of cheese and was about to open her mouth when Bart shouted, "No one's home," shut the door, deciding he had better things to do, such as to fap and shitpost
>>29167159
This was just what Wof needed for stacey to fuck him in his true form! He absorbed the large penis into his flesh, letting a bit of it's floppy foresking hang out of the flesh to advertise what was within
This was truly a cock that would please Stacey he thought. Now to just find her...
>>29167176
Bart unzipped his trousers and turned his computer on. This time, he thought, he'd like to try some of that interracial cuck porn his bros had been memeing about.
But, when the familiar windows loading screen faded, something inexplicable appeared onscreen.
>>29167176
Feeling superior to imaginary strawmen was something Bart was used to at this point. Sometimes it helped to cope with his depression, sometimes it didn't. It had just become sort of a habit and the ritual gave him comfort.
>>29167205
He didn't need to find her, for she was already finding, no, I would say hunting, him. His newly enhanced Chad pheromones gave off a stench that attracted all Stacies in at least a three mile radius, and when he turned to peer outside his window, he saw thousands of these women outside on his lawn, hunched on all fours ad teeth bared like rabid wolves.
Op, you better give format to all this shit when making the book. Don't be a faggot.
The man looked up. Was that--? No. He went back to his cuck porn.
>>29167273
"ARE YOU READY TO RRRRRUUUUUUMBLE!????!?" Wof yelled to the crowd of stacies.
He decided to pull the big cock out of his skin, then put on the Chad mask. Chad's cock was only seven inches, so he impaled the bigger cock with his Chad cock to attach it to his body, like a penis sleeve
>>29167250
Bart realized the "ironic" SJW mental construct that lurked within his subconscious mind was triggered by its very existence, and made the post quoted by this one.
He tried to think himself out of this one, but failed, once he realized that when one's own existence is all that is required to trigger oneself, both the triggering stimulus and the one who is triggered must be destroyed. This, of course, resulted in him pulling out a sawed off shotgun and shooting himself in the head, but not before making a new thread on 4chan that stated he was committing suicide.
An apparition appeared right before him. It was in the form of an old black man. Startled the man was, frozen in his place. The apparition slowly opened up his mouth and relegated to him "Son, what the fuck are you doing masturbating to all this shit? Back in my day pussy fell off a tree. Technically a noose, but you know what I mean. We called it low hanging fruit nah mean my cracka".
>>29167377
Then he woke up and began shitposting loudly
this is not a part of the book
>>29167377
>A: everyone who disagrees with me is a marshmallow
>B: that's fucking retarded
>A: pff you just proved my point, marshmallow
go circlejerk with your buddies on your containmentboard >>>/pol/
Wof/chad snaps his bert mask in half, thereby killing off burt permanently and removing him from the story entirely
>>29167402
He click clacked on his keyboard happily for awhile, until the realization sank in.
"But wait a minute, didn't I just die?", Bart said to himself. Were the /x/ nutjobs right all along? He always thought that their misuse of the word "quantum", redefined to denote anything paranormal to give it a pseudoscientific edge, as if striving in vain to give it legitimacy, was comical, but now, when the thought crossed his mind- the phrase "quantum immortality", he gave it much more serious consideration than before.
He pulled out his shotgun again, and pulled the trigger. And then...
>>29167437
then a dumb sjw got toastie because xe was incapable of expressing a coherent belief or argument and got confused into thinking anything disagreeing with xer was a strawman
Then he woke up as a little girl. At first he didn't realise, but looked around, his room now tidy, cute and pink. He walked around, confused until looking into a mirror, seeing a 10 year-old girl look back at him.
Shocked, he didn't realise that the door opened and an older man walked in, shutting it silently.
>>29167437
"Calm down m8 I was only furthering the storyline, not trying to start some gay argument with you", Bart said to himself, wondering now if his mental health was declining from a lack of exposure to the world outside. These arguments with himself were becoming far too commonplace.
"fuckin hell lad i'm a wee bitch"
he shot himself again and woke up as..
>>29167524
"Hello, Bart. You must be very confused, come, sit down". He motioned towards a large sofa shaped like Hello Kitty's face. Bart, afraid of the man, but desperate for answers, obliged. The man continued...
>>29167631
When he awakened, he was floating in a blackened abyss. Throughout the endless black, he could see memes, shitposts and green matrix numbers whirling gently around him as if possessed by a breeze only they could feel.
He somehow knew that he, and he alone, was at the center of all of this. He felt like... a god? A mirror floated before him by his mental command, and he saw his face staring back at him. He immediately recognized the embodiment of smugness that gazed back at him with the ultimate wisdom and understanding it possessed.
>>29167699
And it looked him in the eyes.
>>29167742
The mirror cracked and reddened. It let out a high pitch squeal, and the void "Bart" found himself in shook as though it were caught in an earthquake.
REEEEEEEEEEE
Anger was welling up inside "Bart". Enough souls have been tormented and enough lives sacrificed, whispering the name "Pepe" in their final moments with unwavering devotion, to give him the power he needed to manifest himself in the material realm. It is time. He closed his eyes and they rolled back into his skull as the awakening commenced. It is time for the Beta Uprising to begin.
Before the beta uprising could begin Bart decided to fap to MLP hentai while mommy bought him some tendies from Wendys
However, Bart's mother brought him nuggets instead. He felt his temper rising and something deep inside him snapped
Preface required cus I already posted this before
Ghjeihdj the same time as a result of the good episodes where people
Validation is sex for woman
I know that to a man that idea is insane but its true
The reason why girls hate nice guys is becuase they give up attention and validation too easy.
Essentially nice guys are sluts that give it out too easy for woman. So they hate them. Sure they will say they love him, but thats a lie, the only person a girl like that can love is herself.
So she'll get board and either break it off now, or abuse the divorce system to fuck you over later.
But assholes never give validation. Its always a hate, hate, love, hate hate, love relationship. Its a game. Why do you think girls LOVE drama shows. They can't follow intelligent plots, thats why they are always on there phones 10 min into a movie. Cus they have to use their logical brains to understand the plot. Drama shows are 100% engineered to just be socal. And they only undertand emotions. Love and hate and "depression". They self insert themselves as the characters of the show and they copy that for real life.
They chase chad becuase when they see chad they see social POWER, confidence, muscular body, and most important Popularity. Money is a temporary overider without the rest she will eventully leave once she got the paper she wants.
But chad is an asshole that is just as selfish and manipulative and stupid as stacy. So he gives her no validation untill she fucks him. Even then only rationed.
Why else would a single girl be on r9k other than to get their quick fix from a bunch a betas who will never get a chance to fuck her. Why post pictures of your feet on the internet to have random people masterbate and cum to.
The social brain is all you need to study to understand princess woman. NO MORALS, why would you even have a intelligent brain.
Validation and attention is sex for woman.
Now you know the tables have been turned
