>you're not a virgin, are you anon?
Yeah.
You're not wearing your seatbelt slut.
uh...n-no.........!
>>29142640
Kek what robot would ever be in this situation?
And you can spin the virginity by saying you're waiting for a girl you love. I had a Chad friend who pulled the shit and it works, so maybe you need to be somewhat desirable in the first place
>tell people I'm not a virgin
>they start questioning me excessively on my sex life
>get spooked and cave admitting I'm a virgin
>all laugh at me in unison
But I am. What are you gonna do about it?
>>29142640
No Stacy 1 & 2, Im not :) why?
>>29142640
no im not a virgin :)
>>29142691
You need to keep your story simple, and still embarrassing enough that it doesn't sound like a lie. My go-to starting in senior year of HS was "a fat European girl on a Carnival Cruise".
The thing is they know what the answer is before they even ask the question. They just want to hear what you have to say for yourself.
>>29142640
No, why?
You are a virgin, aren't you femanon?
>>29142710
Yeah, if you say yes then they will look at you as a beta male who cant into sex, and if you say no then they know you are lying and will tell everyone you are a virgin
Getting in this situation, there is no good outcome
>>29142684
I have been 3 times already. They're always painful.
just fucking lie about it, who gives a shit?
>>29142640
>Errrr y..yes, I am.
>STOP LAUGHING AT ME YOU WHORE
>REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>"yes, but my existence is not validated by a hole, there is more in life than that"
>tip my fedora existencially at then
>they run in fear of my power
fucking whores
I lost it to a girl in another school but you don't know her.
>>29142640
why are we on a bus
why do you have marathon bracelets on
>high school
>girls laughing at me after I hinted at my viginity
>get mad and tell them to enjoy their STDs
>years later
>hear about one of them killing herself after being diagnosed AIDS
>smirk
>"why are you smiling like that anon ? it's terrible"
not my proudest moment, but yeah
Idk. That depends on whether or not you count just the tip.
>tfw semi virgin cuz big dick :(
The last time I opened up to people was 6 years ago and they drilled me on my virginity and I basically became a laughingstock for the entire job.
I'll never relax around normals again. Better to be hated and feared as the creepy loner than ridiculed as the open loser.
>>29142640
>you're not a virgin, are you anon?
>mumbles
>I won't be after I rape your corpse tonight
>What was that, anon? I didn't hear.
>I-I have to go to the bathroom
>Naruto run away
I was raped.Not really but fuck em for asking
>work retail
>one of my coworkers has recently done a planogram reset on the family planning section
>go to warehouse after she's done
>she yells "HEY ANON WANT SOME CONDOMS"
>say "s-sure?"
>one of the managers is there
>she says "the right answer is 'no'!"
>i just laugh and change the subject
what did my manager mean by that
>yes
>proceed to stare right into their eyes without blinking for 30 seconds
>say "not for long with you here"
>>29142640
I'm born under the Virgo sign.
>no I lost it to a far chick at 26
I want it back
>ignore them so they feel stupid
>you don't sleep around, do you?
if you want to make sure im not, why don't you come to my room later tonight
>>29142684
lmao, that shit only "worked" because he was Chad. It wouldn't work with you, faggot.
>>29142684
Because he was a Chad...
incels like us wouldn't be praised like that. We'd be laughed at.
I've never had anyone ask me if I'm a virgin. I look like a normie but I'm a depressed awkward sperg. I'd probably go REEEEEEEEE and run away.
>>29142659
It a bus
>>29144546
Lel, this reminds me of those Tumorzone posts
>>29142640
No, I'm not, but sometimes I wish I was so that I would have more social credit on an anonymous imageboard.
"Nah I had a few trysts in college, but it may please m'lady to know I've since been unattached from the fairer sex. Safe travels, angel of the morning"
This girl that I've been hooking up with (havent fucked her...yet) called me a virgin the other day.
What do?
>>29145697
well are you a virgin? if yes, there is no point in lying about it, she knew the first second she saw you
>>29145775
Well I am and she must have known. She Still let me suck on her tits though so its all good.
>>29142640
Not a filthy degenerate.
True purity exists within this temple, you pious charlatans!
>>29142640
So, at what age did you guys start getting asked this question? At 18 nobody has ever bothered to ask me this.
>>29145949
Don't really get asked often. But whenever people are talking about sex and girls they've fucked I'm always left out and it seems obvious to them that I am one.
>>29144746
>oh my god Stacy he's too embarrassed to even answer!
>ew he can't even look at us oh my god
>Chad look! Anon is scared of girls
>>29142640
The one in the background = Crimson Chin
>>29142640
yes, how does it make you feel you won't be taking it Stacey?
>>29146075
i'm pretty sure she'll be just fine not having to fuck an ugly manlet's crooked micropenis, anon
>>29145949
not really straight up asked, but when you are among friends or male family members like uncles and cousins and they start sharing stories....your turn will come up.
But im 27 kv... im done, if by some miracle a girl ever becomes interested in me she cant find out i've never been in a relationship... so everytime that comes up i just go to the same story.
>I used to hang around this girl in the first year of college (true, some friends saw us together)
>Some afternoons we used to go to her dorm so i could help her with programming assignments (sort of true, did it maybe twice)
>we ended up fucking a couple of times (not true)
I've used that story so many times that i almost believe its true and its not like anyone is gonna check, people almost expect these things to happen in college so.
>>29146014
>mfw that happened to me
>>29146160
savage
but fuck you too Stacey
>>29142640
No but it's been quite a while since I had sex, heh.
*he lies pretending not to be a virgin*
>>29142640
No, and I'm a faggot. You and your disgusting ass vaginas need to get the fuck out of here.
>comes out to a coworker that im a virgin and very bad with women
>every time they promise to take me out and get me laid
>they never invite me out
Why do chads lie about shit like this.
>>29146174
That's why I always hang out with the kids
