Can the normies/semi-Chads who frequent this board please give me concrete, step-by-step instructions on how to lose my kissless virginity?
I am a normal looking guy who has friends and a social life, but I am a perpetual kissless virgin.
Even just getting a kiss from a girl would change my life entirely. I would really appreciate some advice because I'm falling apart here.
Please normies. I'm dying here.
>>29123844
1) Get drunk
2) Go to party with some loose, drunk women
3) ????
4) Profit
There ya go bud.
>>29123844
Search for a social event of some sort like a house party advertised on social media, or go clubbing while disguised and pick up drunk women. The only reason 80% of women go clubbing is for that sort of thing, you'll be able to tell which ones are up for sex because they'll have drifted away from the friends they came clubbing with.
Try working on body language. A person with good body language makes people look at them in a very different and intriguing way. Speak with confidence. Hand gestures are a must when conversing, but if you do them too much it looks forced and you look like a try hard retard. SMILE. LAUGH. Girls eat that shit up. Empty platitudes rile them up and make you seem smart and understand.
Well, that's just my two cents.
>>29124340
And most of all - do NOT ever give off the impression that you're trying to please whatever group of people you're in. (le just b urself XDD) because it makes you seem like an actual individual, and not just part of the herd, which makes you stand out more.
Take all my pseudo-science and anecdotes with a grain of salt though.
>>29124319
But I've tried that before. Pretty sure drunk girls have flirted with me at parties too. But I'm too scared to try and escalate things because I'm so inexperienced.
>>29124333
>Search for a social event of some sort like a house party advertised on social media, or go clubbing while disguised and pick up drunk women
Is it really a good idea to do this completely by myself? I'm in a weird situation where my friends are pretty much normies, but they don't like clubbing and they don't throw parties that involve people outside of our social circle. So if I want to meet new people I pretty much have to do it alone.
>>29124340
I thought I was already doing all of those things.
Go on YouTube and type
RSD Todd
He changed my life and how I look at girls
>>29123844
Not a normie but i know them better than they know themselves.
You see normies are great liars. They lie to themselves to avoid depression and they lie to others to obtain things. If you want to be like them you have to lie about your interests and pretend to be confident.
Every normie just pretends to be what is popular.
>>29124417
Except that's bullshit.
By "normie" I don't even mean the absolute most normal, upright people. I mean people who have kissed/had girlfriends/had sex.
There is very clearly something different about those people in comparison to me. I want to know what it is. I want to know how to be like them.
>>29124386
>But I'm too scared to try and escalate things because I'm so inexperienced
There you have it. You already know your problem, and how to overcome it. Just nut up and do something. If she doesn't like it it's far from the end of the world. Girls are well used to fending off unwanted advances from everyone else. They're expecting you to escalate slowly and steadily, it's your job to do that but to stop if she says no.
>>29124658
>There is very clearly something different about those people in comparison to me.
they're better liars
>I want to know what it is.
they lie better than you
>I want to know how to be like them.
get better at lying.
>>29123844
Sorry for my bad english but this what is think.
You need to ask yourself "Why can normies filrt with girls with such naturality?"
It's because they have learn to do it through socialisation and they have natural empathy.
No offence buy most of us including myself are in the autism spectrum,that's why we can't "read" girls and manipulate their feelings by speaking with them.
Normies already know what to do.
Of course you can improve your appearance,you aren't getting laid if the girl you like doesn't see you as a potential sexual partner to being with.
The problem is that as an average autist you need to improve your social skil,empathy and the way you comunicate as well (Body language,personality,conversation topics, dating strategy etc.)
There is many books,articles and even videos about these topics and you may as well take therapy
>>29124417
You don't have to lie about your interests unless all you do is play video games and fap to hentai
>>29123844
Jus be yourself bud
>>29124829
BEE
khj2j9khlh7fdsgjhr
>>29124690
>They're expecting you to escalate slowly and steadily, it's your job to do that but to stop if she says no.
I have absolutely no idea how to do this in a natural and confident manner.
There's also the issue that once it comes to physical initiation, I am essentially paralysed. There have been times when I am tipsy enough to be able to fake confidence and talk a girl into being quite friendly with me, but I absolutely cannot initiate anything physical with them. I simply cannot bring myself to even do so much as kiss a girl. It's like my body actively rebels against me.
>>29124763
Yes, I get what you mean. But isn't that a lot of work just to be able to get as far as kissing a girl? Why do I have to go through years of intensive therapy to do what everyone else did when they were 11 years old?
There are plenty of autistic guys with girlfriends. I know some personally. Why can they do it but I can't?
>>29123844
Semi-normie here. I lurk r9k for teh lulz.
This might sound cliche but get drunk and focus on having fun(not on getting a gf). Regarding how to select your target, pick the girl who gets the least attention in her group.
Have fun and it will happen
>>29124882
>This might sound cliche but get drunk and focus on having fun(not on getting a gf)
>Have fun and it will happen
This is literally exactly what I have done for nearly 4 years and I am still a 100% kissless virgin.
>>29124935
How can you possible have fun with a girl if she doesnt enjoy your company?
>>29123844
Femanon here, you should do the following
>Be confident, nice, caring, and funny
>Be 6'3' or higher
>Have a well paid, successful job
>Be healthy/fit/muscular
>Have a good face
1. go to the gym. even if you don't end up getting ripped, you'll lose weight, feel and look healthier, plus you'll have more confidence
2. talk to guys. this is very important for lots of people here. you're so desperate to find out how to talk to girls but a lot of you dont even have male friends to talk to and this can limit your social skills. believe it or not, talking to girl (not flirting) is exactly the same as talking to a boy, you're just building it up too much in your head
3. buy new clothes. good clothes, with a nice haircut and some good looking shoes. I'd say go to /fa/ but some of the stuff they come out with is atrocious, you just have to find a style that suits you. even go to a shop and ask a personal shopper for help. believe it or not, normies are not going to laugh at you or bully you for not knowing what to do, they're going to help because thats what normal people outside of high school do
- also, the clothes help because a. you look more appealing to women, but you also look richer - if he can afford nice clothes, he can afford me, this might sound shallow but women are engrained to find a suitable partner so these are all good signs in their head
4. watch panel shows, comedies, standup, anything. I don't want you to try to remember routines because that would be embarrassing, but learning wit and how to interact, engage and entertain other people is very important for holding relationships
hopefully, when you're feel proud of how you look and confident in your skin, all these pieces should fall in place and it will honestly be noticeable how much of a happier, more 'alive' person you are. you'll feel easier holding eye contact, easier talking to random people because you know that it really isn't that scary
this is what makes people a chad, its confidence. being confident literally makes you look alpha, because just like you these people are terrified, you're just going to learn how to hide it better
any q's?
>>29125031
Well, I have several female friends so some girls must enjoy my company, just perhaps not in a romantic/sexual way.
I get on with girls pretty well at parties. But nothing happens between me and them. It just doesn't progress.
>>29125091
Yes but
>I already have plenty of male friends
>I already wear pretty good clothes and shoes (A lot of friends even go to me for fashion advice)
>I don't know if I'm funny, but I have noticed I do tend to make friends laugh a lot (including girls, and no they're generally not laughing at my expense)
Going to the gym might help yeah. Don't know what else I can do really.
>>29124877
Ok very roughly, there are levels of intimacy associated with everyone's body parts. Hands and shoulders are low level, maybe feet, head and back are mid level, and erogenous zones are high level. It's different from people and culture but you get the idea. You start at low levels and work your way up, that is, holding hands or put your arm around her. Then try something else. There's really no way to say how to go about it because it's sharply dependent on you, her, the environment, history and culture. It's a skill that can be learned but also requires improvisation. You will not be good at it at the start, because nobody is. All you can do is try, analyze and learn from what happens.
Here's a slightly stupid analogy but you ever play an MMO? There's all those max level guys slaying dragons, but you're level one. It sucks, but you have to start there and level up. They did too. They have a bit of a leg up on you but don't hold it against them. You start leveling because that's how you get there.
>>29124877
>But isn't that a lot of work just to be able to get as far as kissing a girl?
You can't run if you don't know how to walk.
normies have developed their normie mentality since puberty and we didn't
It looks easy to from our perspective "A guy and a girl likes each other and they just get into a relationship"
I used to belive everythinig was that simple too,but people (especially girls) are more emotionally complex than I thought
.
The more damaged is a machine the more repairs it needs
>Why can they do it but I can't?
They can do it naturally and you are not them. don't compare yourself.
Attracting people with your personality is not just meme you need to improve your mind and appearance
It takes time buy you can become really good at having conversations and looking above average.
>>29125186
can you hold a conversation or do you just throw in the occasional funny input to make people laugh? girls might like your company in a group but they need to like you as the individual
> stop being a pathetic fuck
> get laid
>>29125227
>>29125267
This all makes sense, but it still sucks shit.
You're telling me that I'm going to have to waste my uni years toiling towards the most basic of goals, and probably be in my mid 20s before I finally figure out what I'm doing with women? In which case I'll never really get to enjoy romance/intimacy/sex.
>>29125289
Sometimes things just flow out of me and I hold the most natural conversations ever. I make people laugh, I'm confident, I fit seamlessly into normie society.
Other times I'm reserved, can't seem to get words out, super self-conscious. It's completely unpredictable.
>get drunk with friends
>suggest spin the bottle
>wait until you get picked
Works everytime
>>29125403
>dat attitude
no wonder girls dont like you
>>29125543
What the fuck are you even talking about? Why criticise me without even telling me what I'm doing wrong?
>>29125626
You have big attitude problems, you think socializing is wasting time
>also that denial
>>29123844
Kissing is physically easy. No one will know whether you're just a bad kisser or whether you've never kissed anyone before even if it is really bad. So don't worry about kissing someone because you have never done it before.
I've had sex with around 20 girls now, but it can still be nerve wracking to escalate to kissing, especially if they are in your friend group (by far the easiest to hook up with and bed, but also the biggest gamble) because rejection would be embarrassing. If you're too nervous to risk rejection from someone you'll have to see again and again then try to find a dance club that is kind of trashy but not too trashy and have a few drinks. Your best bet is to make a weekend trip to a college town for this route.
You obviously need to break the touch barrier before kissing someone so they are more comfortable with you. The key is finding ways to do this without it being creepy or overdoing it and being the handsy guy. Think when pictures are being taken (don't hover hand. Get a good hold in a place that isn't sexual, but isn't completely innocent either, like right above hip bone) moving through a crowded place with your hand on their back, etc. If you can get in a position where they are comfortable with being touched by you in a semi-sexual way you're close enough to try and kiss them.
The main thing is to keep an eye out for signals, but honestly some girls are just incredibly hard to read in that sense so sometimes you just have to grow a pair and go for it. Rejection isn't the end of the world.
I tried my best to think about what works for me but it kind of comes naturally, so these aren't things I have really thought hard about before when I'm trying to hook up with people. Hope it helps you, though. Sorry it went on a little long.
>>29123844
I went from loser to losing virginity. I had to put quite a bit of conscious effort into learning things normies do automatically, so I may be able to help you. Not even close to semi-chad though, so here goes nothing:
Any social relationship (not just romantic ones) takes many steps to come into existence. You have to break it down into these individual steps to see where you are failing and then create a plan that stops this failure.
For a romantic relationship a few of the most important steps might be this:
>Girl and boy see each other
>Girl and boy find each other attractive
>Boy talks to girl, the conversation goes well
>Boy asks girl out, girl accepts
>First date goes well
>etc etc etc
Any of those steps could go badly, leading to an end of the potential relationship. I look at it as a game that is mostly about mistakes, excelling at one particular step is meaningless if you fuck up in another important area.
This leads to an unfortunate conclusion: We can't help you much because we don't know what mistakes you are making because we don't know you. It's up to you to look at your social interactions step by step to see where things go awry, figure out why and then fix the problem.
>get on tinder
>swipe right on everyone
>say hi to any matches you get
>find one who seems interested
>suggest a time and place to meet up
>go back to your place or her place
>tell her you're not sure if you want to kiss her or not
>let her take the lead
>kiss
>let things progress
>have sex
>tell the ho to get lost
>>29125678
>you think socializing is wasting time
No I don't. I was just saying that if I have to waste my uni years and my early 20s figuring out the very basics, then by the time I know what I'm doing I will have far less opportunities, because I'll probably be mid 20s and in the "real adult world" where there are much less women to meet.
I want to figure things out as quickly as possible. A few months to a year. I need some kind of intensive programme to get me as much experience as possible.
>>29125944
I tried Tinder but I'm too much of a nervous wreck to use it. I would match with girls and then be too scared to message them. One girl messaged me and we Skyped for a bit, and then she randomly stopped speaking to me. Then a day after that I had some shitty 5 minute conversation with another girl and she just stopped replying. After that I gave up.
Also, something tells me that girls on Tinder of all places are going to be the least tolerant of kissless virgins.
>>29125403
>It's completely unpredictable
Again sorry for my bad english.
Human communication is extremely complex.
Things such as tone of voice,facial expression,body language,choice of words,appearance,emotional state,context ect are things you need to interpret to deduct.
and you are communicating in the same way making it a very demanding task.
There is a immense amount of comments you can make during a conversation and many ways you can express yourself
>I'll never really get to enjoy romance/intimacy/sex
You will enjoy it at any age.
>You're telling me that I'm going to have to waste my uni years toiling towards the most basic of goals and probably be in my mid 20s before I finally figure out what I'm doing with women?
No,you can fix your appearance and personality in a single year if you have at least 3 hours of free time per day and know what to do.
Exercise:30 minutes
Preparing healty food for the day:20 minutes
Nails,hair and skin care:10 minutes
Dressing well: No time
Reading,practicing hobbies and learning conversation topics:2 hours or whenever you can.
>>29123844
even though it's plebbit it's pretty based
/r/theredpill
>>29125403
>>29126162
>Other times I'm reserved, can't seem to get words out, super self-conscious.
That is why reading and therapy may help.
>>29123844
There is not step by step.
Become a social person.
If you cant do this women are not for you.
Ive been trying for years Im just super autistic.
OH WELL
I did get laid though
>>29123844
The key to social success is to stop overthinking things which is hard for you smart dudes anyway. Just go to the girl say the first thing that comes to mind, if she get mad blow her off she will like that her atttempt to shame you only made you reject you rather than apologize like a pussy.
>>29126250
>Ive been trying for years Im just super autistic
>I did get laid though
You aren't as autistic as you think you are.
You seem to have a problem with overcoming anxiety, thats easy to overcome.
My friends and I had an agreement. Anytime someone chickend out of anything, we got to slap them. Like a slapbet by then just as punishment. It hurts like hell but its a great way to force yourself to go balls to the wall.
![[SHREDDING INTENSIFIES].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/z4EAsgD.jpg "[SHREDDING INTENSIFIES].jpg")
>[after three years lifting in hope someone will just jump on my dick eventually]
>hot day
>walking by the street showing my gains
>hear three teen girls hollering at me from a window
>don't know what to do and just ignore them
How are you supposed to react to this? It's the second time it happens, btw
Finger guns and a smile? "hey bbs you want sum fuk"? Or is this supposed to be a compliment and nothing more?
PS. still felt great, and yes I am 100% sure they were directed at me both times (60% they weren't sarcastic)
