I shit myself in a JCPenneys today AMA
why did you shit yourself in a jcpenneys?
kek, the ama about such a thing is great satire.
congrats, you made a depressed person laugh out loud.
>>29112078
Hahahah this made crack up
>>29112078
Didn't you post in another thread about this?
btw you should just hide away for a couple of days, go on vacation, make them forget you shit yourself.
Whats your favorite brand of tendies
>>29112078
there's literally nothing more I need to know about this or ask you, because I already laughed
>>29112078
how did you shit yourself?
was it voluntary?
>>29112103
I drank milk mixed with three tablespoons of sriracha earlier in the day and it made me have explosive diarrhea five hours later
>>29112122
I'm going hiking with them tomorrow so I can't
>>29112078
I'm gonna have to work there you stupid piece of shit. Stop staining the floor
>>29112125
The honey roasted ones made by Tysons
>>29112183
what made you want to do that?
>>29112206
Fucking kek
If they bring it up my man, you own up to it. They'll laugh, and it'll be forgotten. But ONLY if they bring it up
>>29112176
As I was approaching the bathroom the shit evacuated from my asshole so no it was not voluntary
I shitted my pants in highschool PE. This was probably worst than you desu.
i picked up one of my buddies on the way to a concert. the first thing he says when he gets in the car is that he shit himself while out frisbee golfing. we all had a good laugh
>>29112258
sorry
i just cant fathom how one can lose their bowels
are you like 100 fucking years old?
>>29112248
It tastes really good and I am addicted to it in spite of the explosive diarrhea
>>29112323
god bless you
you glorious pants shitter
did you at least get what you went there to buy?
>>29112364
I don't have a job so I felt guilty buying stuff so I just waited for my friends to finish and then we went to a movie where I saw a seat away from them bc "I needed space"
>>29112311
Have you never had diarrhea before?
Wow Thanks everyone for the support! It's been almost 24 hours since I've left the store and I must say things are a lot better. I tried washing my underwear out in the sink but ultimately decided to throw them away (thankfully the trash gets picked up tomorrow). Right now I'm soaking my bum in an epsom salt bath and watching Game of Thrones on my iPad. :-)
UPDATE: I called and spoke with the dressing room attendant and turns out I'm not banned from the store. In fact, the woman had no idea what I was talking about and assured me that the security department hadn't mentioned seeing anything on their cctv.
EDIT: Wow Reddit Gold!
>>29112707
This is fake I flushed my underwear down the toilet in the JCPenneys bathroom stall
>>29112707
can you shut the fuck up with your dumb emoticons?
>>29112078
nice OP i shit myself in the kitchen a couple months ago
>>29112898
How did that happen anon
>>29112254
>it'll be forgotten
lolwut, I would never forget if a friend shit his pants
Where was it in the JC penny, was it by the perfume?
>>29113129
I was walking thru the JCPenneys so I past a lot of sections
i shit myself in my truck a few months ago.
>had diarrhea for 2 weeks
>thought i was over it.
>got into my truck and went literally 2 min down the road
>ass started feeling wet
>pull over and check
>sure enough shit eveywhere and running down legs
>seat and floor mats completely covered in shit
>don't try to clean till next day
>shit on seat has really soaked in and hardened
>nothing i try can get it out
>take it to professional cleaning service
>have to explain how i shit all over my seat and that i now need them to clean it
most embarrassing thing that's happened all year and i had to pay $540 for the cleaning
>>29113075
i gambled on a fart and lost
>>29112078
I shit myself in like 3rd grade. I remember it rolling out the bottom of my jeans onto the floor and I just kinda stared at it for a while and walked away. I wonder who had to clean up my shit balls.
try to commited a suicidal and get put in mental hospital
you never have to see outside again!
