What's the best mental illness to fake for neetbux? My doctor already thinks I'm a paranoid schizophrenic, should I just roll with that?
I'd be careful - a diagnosis like that will require strong psych meds that could fuck your brain up.
>>29052160
would say it's your best option, you can get away with that quite easily. If you were to claim you had aspergers or autism you'd have to act like a tard whenever you're around the doctor, and basically everybody else
>>29052160
Are personality disorders covered? If they are go for something like BPD, it's got no treatment beyond therapy (and even then only 80% have no symptoms after 15 years).
>>29052274
...thats why you just dont take them
if you aren't really on the schiz you wont actually need them
you can just start acting a little more robotic in your actions and mannerisms so they think you are drugged up
you get neetbuxs, you have an official excuse to stuff now, and you got pills you could use to drug someone or sell or just throw away or something I dunno
its winwin
>>29052274
Surely I just to have pretend to take them and "get better"?
>>29052274
not like he has to actually take them
>>29052274
Just don't take them, say that you've taken them when you're supposed to, and ever so slowly but surely stop acting so paranoid so it looks like it's working
look at you fucking sorry lott, all helping each at our hard earned labour, have you no shame!
what a disgrace
Go on welfare with diagnosed schizophrenia. After a while, tell doctor you're fine and don't feel the need for the meds (they really fuck you up though). I doubt the doctor calls up the welfare to say that you don't have schizophrenia anymore. Permanent neetbux.
>>29052343
it's not like they're gonna ask for all the money back they gave you in benefits
My advice to you is, to do what your parents did! Get a job, sir! The bums will always lose!
>>29052160
Oh lawdy lawdy lawd boy you had best read dis here long thread.
It'd help ya if ya doo.
https://warosu.org/jp/thread/S6512844#p6512924
>>29052343
If he's in America he WILL have continuing evaluations where he will be require to get a medical signoff that his condition is continuing and that he's trying to get treatment for it.
>>29052160
autism
just avoid eye contact and talking
>>29052160
Good luck. I have genuine schizoaffective disorder and you're never going to be able to fake the medications side effects.
>>29053196
Autists have a special vocal tone when they speak that is almost impossible to fake unless you're an A-list actor (see Rain Man). You'll never get away with this one either.
>>29052160
Schizoaffective guy here again. If you really want to fake schizo meds, here are some atypical antipsychotic side effects that you will have to fake...
>narcolepsy
>brain fog (hard to fake and seem genuine)
>migraines
>sudden, uncontrollable face movements and tics
>slurred speech
>suicidal ideation (planning your suicide)
>no emotional response
>little pain response (good luck faking this faggot)
>lapses in memory
Time to brush up on your acting skills OP. You're gonna need to be oscar-worthy for this one. However, if you are the failure you seem to be, then I would guess that you could never successfully fake any of these side effects and that a life of wagecucking is ahead of you :^)
>>29052342
fuck of wagie
Whats a simple mobile game i can make that will make me money
I dont want to be a wage slave anymore
>>29053626
I've thought about writing an app that measures that tells you when your bath is full by comparing the the property of the sound waves to when your bath is full to how they are currently and then emitting an alarm when it's full.
Probably a worthless idea that's already been done but hey I've seen worse things be highly downloaded off the appstore before.
>>29053688
Poeple just shower nowadays
>>29053852
Yeah I mostly do, but I still take a bath every Sunday midday and it's quite annoying having to routinely check my bath for 15 minutes. Enough to make me download an app to just do it for me.
>tried getting neetbux
>went to doctor to get a diagnosis
>knew I was acting
>completely signed me off
Living in canada is suffering, shit is not easy.
>>29052316
>it's got no treatment beyond therapy
You are correct, but a lot of times you will get meds to help with the symptoms
Typical and atypical antipsychotics and mood stabilizers get used for BPD
I am on abilify, because of BPD
>>29053408
it's called a monotone genius
just practise
>>29052160
Thiscomment must be taken with a grain of salt, but I think that's a good idea. You don't even need to fake it, unless you already fooled your doctor.
>>29053688
>>29053887
That's what maids are for.
>>29053549
t. "i have never been drunk"
>>29052432
Gib carpet!
>>29054087
Get baked and drunk next time. Not so drunk that you;'re sloppy, just enough to annihilate your social inhibitions.
You'll find that acting like a seroquel zombie comes naturally.
>>29052160
Is it really that easy to convince a doctor that you have an illness when you don't?
I've been thinking about going to a psychologist or something but this makes it sound like they're unable to evaluate correctly.
>Go to doc ready to fake depression and autism
>Doctor brings out a "depression questionnaire"
>Answer honestly
>Scored for severe depression and immediately signed off work
The questions were things like; Score from one to five, I enjoy spending time with my friends, I look forward to every day, Family is worth living for, Life is Gods blessing, etc
Stop this. You'll never be happy. NEETdom is a lie.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fXkhku-Zo9M
>>29053408
SHIT
I knew my acting career would take off one day.
>>29052432
Fucking fascists, man.
>>29052160
I actually have paranoid schizophrenia, you are telling me that I can get money for that, hell yeah
>>29052160
Here's my guide to getting NEETbux
>1. Take overdose
>2. Make sure its enough to kill you, but probably not
>3. Be a massive cunt to everyone
>4. Get some time in the funny farm
>5. Break some chairs and windows while inside
>6. Get out in a month, with a personality disorder (BPD)
>7. Stop doing it for neetbux and just do it out of boredom
And there you have it, EZ NEETbux or that's how I did/do it, anyways.
I'm Johnny Neptune, hack_blastards father... I think you should know every single one of these responses you have received so far is either completely wrong, miserably inside out, contrived and fabricated, or actually downright dangerous... None of these people seem to know anything about even basic psychology, definitely not advanced psychology, nothing about Psychiatry which is the mixture of internal medicine and psychology, OR pharmacology which might be the most important part of all... Atypical Antipsychotics are the classification of medication that these people are trying to discuss but they don't know anything about it... These medications are extremely detrimental. If you want to know the actual answers that you're looking for, I will be happy to give you the exact information they change psychiatrist will be using to evaluate you and determine whether or not you are malingering...... however, I can cut to the Chase and do you a big favor saving you a lot of time if you would so choose...
You're wasting your time... You would have to wait 3 years to be approved and you can't make a penny between now and then or you'll be disqualified and when the whole thing is said and done, you'll receive jack shit. Here in America, okay I have met people in chat rooms and all of them say it's only $733 a month....
If you think waiting 3 years, trying to pretend that you have one of only two organic psychiatric disorders on Earth in make a whopping $733 a month, then you are a bigger loser than even YOU thought....
Do you want to be happy? Why don't you go out there and accomplish something? it doesn't have to be a big deal. It doesn't need to be the big bucks... Why don't you just go out there and help some people? It'll make you feel good about yourself. When you feel good about yourself other people can detect it as you walked by. Hot girls will be able to detect a palpable sense of confidence and an air of success that surrounds you...
>>29054295
>Typical and atypical antipsychotics and mood stabilizers get used for BPD
All I got offered were mood stabilisers, but I didn't take them.
>>29055012
>Drinking makes you plan your own suicide
>Drunk people have no emotional response
>Breathalyzers don't exist
why fake it?
In germany you get neetbux for nothing
do you actually have to pay for meds and you actually don't get free welfare in your countries?
If yes, you should work or kill yourself, or migrate here.
I can't even imagine not having neetbux, god that's fucking scary im sorry for you guys.
>daily reminder everyone of you could just move here and get free neetbux til you die
>>29055760
Sorry but can America they stopped recognizing borderline personality disorder in 2011... Hate to pop your bubble like that but that's not a recognized psychiatric disorder to begin with that's a behavioral disorder
This guy is trying to get government benefits for psychiatric disorder. That means either bipolar or schizoaffective... Not even autism sorry... Bipolar or schizoaffective those are your choices... Borderline personality disorder it's nothing more than a behavioral disorder consider that a psychiatric condition and they don't pay you money for being a complaining little bitch which is what BPD is.. Like I said you people don't know jackshit about psychology Psychiatry or psychology...
You would be more likely to receive disability for being a crybaby that you would borderline personality disorder
>>29055922
thanks for the advice achmed
>>29055952
No Problem, my name is actually Dominik but it's okay.
>>29055922
i am currently in germany and it is very bad here, the food tastes bad and the wifi is slow. i cannot wait to move to england where they treat you well. also why is arabic blocked on this board? that's racist
>>29056014
Food is great you are retarded, just move out of the city, move to an small town, and life will be godlike.
