skid marks
- Home
- Board: /r9k/ - ROBOT9001
- Reading: skid marks
>have a rancid hangover
>do a couple of really foul messy shits during the day
>nbd thats the price of drinking cheap red wine
>go to doctors to get a couple of suspect moles checked for cancer
>in australia you gotta watch out for skin cancer
>doctor tells me not to worry, they're just irritated and inflamed, not cancerous
>tells me to drop trou so he can check my legs
>no homo tho
>has me turn around in front of him to check the back
>his face was no more than a foot away from my arse when i turned around
>nbd he has been my doc for 20 years or so now
>way less awkward than i thought it would be
>get home and have a shower
>see colossal skid marks in my undies when i take them off
>check em on the outside
>yep, visible from the outside of them
>gave my doc a face full of skid mark earlier for sure
>will probably have to give it a year or so before i follow up so hopefully he forgets
>>29040502
Why don't you get a hand-held showerhead so you can clean yourself properly?
>>29040550
What? And sit on the toilet and massage my arse with the showerhead? Is that a good technique?
>>29040502
he will remember.
>it's the guy iv'e known for 20 years
>oh yeah he had those gnarly skid marks that one time. Gross.
>tfw bought a bidet off amazon for $25 and attached it to my bathroom toilet
>tfw cleanest asshole possible
>tfw feelin' unclean using another toilet that doesn't have a bidet
>>29040502
>an Aussie posting literal shit
... Is /pol/ leaking again? Am I being memed?
>>29040935
Fuck man, he already knows me as an alcoholic drug addict who used to regularly doctor shop him for benzos.
Fun fact, I also told him there is sometimes blood on the paper when I wipe my shit and he kept his cool and just wrote me a referral to see a proctologist to put a small camera in my arse to see if its a hemorrhoid or arse tumors.
>writing referral to see a proctologist
>after seeing shit stains all over my jocks
I'm assuming at this point my doctor basically sees me as a subhuman.