Why haven't you got yourself a treefu yet? I just spent an hour with mine, a lovely little fig tree I named Adolph.
Trees are nature's providers. Just being near to one you love will fill you with cleansing energy and inspiration. Whether it be among the roots or up the branches, or perhaps nestled within a groove in the trunk.
How can a man be preoccupied with women, knowing that they exist to take from him his energy? A tree never takes, only gives, both physically and mentally. Forming a relationship with a tree will change your life.
>A friend to rest and reflect with
>A gym to get some exercise upon
>A loyal and forgiving provider, there whenever you need it
So /r9k/, what's your excuse?
This is no joke, divorce your computer and marry a tree.
Does it make you feel like you have somewhere you belong? That's how it makes me feel.
Perfectly graceful and carefree, unlike any woman who lives
Look at the shelter they provide, the epitome of comfy
Trees are the foundation upon which this diverse world has been built. Your eternal friends.
They create their own perfectly balanced micro-environments. Just be with one and you will feel yourself take in this balance and be replenished.
A tree lives a life of constant meditation, benefiting all beings and taking life as it comes. These trees have simply adapted to the constant wind.
Would a tree such as this ever pay mind to a tiny human? It must have accumulated such wisdom. I wonder...
And last but not least.
I hope I inspired you to connect with a local tree anons of /r9k/. If you cannot enjoy the company of a tree, whose company can you enjoy?
Holy fuck treefriend, I actually gonna go innawoods again today
>tfw no tree gf
>>29019234
Pic related is the best tree
>disease resistant so no need to worry
>insect resistant so no need to worry
>low maintenance, whether you come one day a week or one day a month it makes no difference
>beautiful fall color, gets me diamonds every time
Can I cum on the tree? Will the tree be my mommy?
>>29019934
I'm so glad!
>>29020022
Does it produce edible nuts? Personally I judge a tree's suitabilty for companionship by how well it can hold a man within it's branches. Your tree looks a little slim and meager for this purpose.
Please keep posting trees. I am enjoying this thread.
>When normies interrupt you and mock you while fucking your treefu
REEE
http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=b0c_1415155092
The legendary Baobab Prison Tree, used to incarcerate the naughty Indigenous Australians during the nineties. Not a bad prison cell to be in at all.
If only we could be so content and full of life as a fat baobab tree.
Fig trees are undoubtedly treefu material. Glorious and hospitable, they provide fruit and shelter. They're also incredibly beautiful trees.
How do you know what tree is the right tree for you? My house is surrounded by trees, the one right outside my window flowers in the spring and tends to have hawks nest in it. What do you think, treefriend? Does it sound like a winner?
Come to think of it, I've got an ~800 yo oak tree not far away where I live
>pic related
Is there a chance the oak will share her wisdom with me?
>>29019234But anon the only thing trees do for me is give me hard wood!
>>29020864
Wow that sounds absolutely lovely. You can definitely judge a tree by the birds which frequent it. My fig tree attracts pretty little fruit-eating birds.
>>29021089
A tree like that would be hard to impress upon but if you are dilligent and pure, and treat her with respect, I'm sure she could come to love you and enjoy new life in her old branches with you.
This thread really makes me want to go on a hike.
I fucking love nature, man.
>>29020405
looks like a dick lol
![tree_resize1[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/MyoA58B.jpg "tree_resize1[1].jpg")
>all these trees
>not one monkey pod
My treefu used to be in my back yard. Shelly's branch was strong enough for us to have a swing on from third grade up until eleventh grade, when my brother's fat ass broke the swing.
Gotta find a new treefu. Possibly this one at a local park that I hide behind to smoke at night. She always protects me from the police <3
>>29019234
Also, trees will stick around long after you're gone and will remain faithful the very ground it was planted it in (unless some asshole comes along and chops it down).
>>29020347
i've been there
there wasn't alot of room inside the tree though, i don't think it was ever used as an actual prison either, just like an overnight cell when transporting prisoners
Who here /treegym/?
Gotta get that monkey strength my dudes, and you won't get it from walking around on flat ground.
>>29019234
>fig
that leaf texture though, is fucking nasty
Lemon, weeping willow and oak are the best
oh, and these look really good too >>29019390
>>29024493
I'm not sure how exactly you would go about enjoying a tall african baobab. They look comfy to sit on top of but it would be a mission to actually get up without branches to climb.
Figs, however...
And the leaf texture is variable between species.
>>29024673
well they're so big and have such an imponent presence you'll always feel safe and protected if you have one.
I suppose I would have to go and test those other fig leaves to approve of this kind of tree as treefu material.
Like these beauties, how could I forget
Eucalyptus cinerea, dem leaves, that gorgeous blue tone they have....
>>29024843
I'm a sucker for blue leaves too. And if colourful Eucalypts are your thing...
>>29019234
I have a shrubfu
That way I can keep them indoors
>>29024959
Loli treefu confirmed
>>29024959
I feel that shrubs lack the higher consciousness that trees possess. Shrubs are so transient and replaceable, they never really get old enough to accumulate any wisdom or personality.
>>29024994
le kek
This is hands down one of the most autistic threads I've ever seen on r9k. You people would rather fuck a tree than a human female. JDIMSA
If I eat the trees nuts am I a faggot?
Many would argue that beauty lies with simplicity, in which case pine trees have an undeniable beauty in their primitive physiology. Like dinosaurs of trees, very ancient and wise. Some will produce for you edible seeds as well, like this bunya pine.
>>29025319
This is more akin to consuming a woman's ovum, being not the reproductive organ but rather a potential separate life-form.
OP you need to go >>>/out/
>>29019234
Any of you guys watched the documentary on people falling in love with objects?
Has a bitch grinding on the Eiffel tower, another with a ferris wheel, another grinding on a tree etc. Legit condition
These are true robots, and mostly female
>>29025414
I could have posted on /an/ or /out/ but I decided who needed the love of the trees most were the good folk of /r9k/. Something pleasant for a change in this pit of corruption and despair.
>>29025593
Ahh well, I might as well tell you of this plant I used to love and hold close to me...
>be me 10 years old kid
>Parents converting the loft but due to complications we have to keep work on hold for a few years
>Mom wants me to grow a tomato plant
>Agree since tomatoes are fucking delish
>Grow it
>Brother kills it and makes die
>Rage out and throw something at him
>Try again but this time put it near a window in the loft
>Plant grows really tall
>I mean reeealy tall
>Almost taller then me
>This keeps up for a few weeks
>Mom tells me that buliding work has to take place and I have to move my plant
>Move it into the garden
>Very windy
>Try and secure it with bamboo sticks
>One night the entire plant is broken
>Cry over my plant
I'm not really sure what happened that day, but that plant despite being so tall was never able to produce and fruit.
Not really a tree but it was the most love I ever showed to a plant, well two other plants I also liked
>take acid
>climb tree
>feel happy
Rinse and repeat twice monthly. Life is better now.
