>tfw literally afraid of relationships
Is there anyone else here like this? People who have obvious and clear changes to get into one, but can't for reasons.
>>29002585
I just want to pork.
All women are fucked up sluts and cunts these days.
>>29002585
Same. I've actually shot down a few people because I know it'll just end badly if they got to know me better. Low self esteem sucks, but maybe its for the best.
I don't see women as privatizable entities, open/poly relationships don't work, and I neither wish to be a cheater or a cuck. Furthermore even if I did accept the premise of a relationship., I don't think I could possibly choose one woman to be with, since I am attracted to over 9000 types of women from petite to very chubby, and know that the feeling of being in love is fickle no matter how deep it feels temporarily. Also because even physical attraction is provisional and conditional- thousands of times I see women in pictures/porn videos that look amazing at first, but then naked look absolutely disgusting because of tattoos or something else. Combine all these autistic realizations together it makes it far more comfortable to just never be in a relationship than to try to start one and then change my mind because it makes me anxious and I realize it sucks or I don't like her anymore.
>>29002696
How does it make you feel?
It makes me hate myself even more. For example: there's this really cute person that's into me. The mere thought of having to go through a relationship in my current position (I have no desire to live) is giving me horrible anxiety. I know that I am an asshole for thinking like that and not giving the person a chance. Normally the ideal solution would be to ignore it, but I cannot do that and uphold the current status quo, which is the least painful path to live life.
>>29002585
This hits home.
Not getting into relationship because too afraid one of us will come out hurt.
Crippling loneliness is a bitch because after a while you convince yourself to live with it and the idea of getting out of it seems ... whats the word?
Cathartic.
Which is fucking scary because i might not be able to do it the second time if it doesnt work out the first time.
>>29002837
It hurts, mostly because when someone says they like me it turns into insulting myself for 20 minutes while they try to say "oh I'm sure its not that bad" until they give up. Which after insulting myself like that I always feel like crap.
I've never thought of it that way as being a jerk by not giving them a chance though. I'm just scared of opening up and letting someone get close, I know I'll get hurt and maybe they will too, and I don't want to hurt anyone.
I've been in relationships before, and I didn't see a point. Same and opposite gender. I've always liked my solidarity, and since middle school I've considered myself as an asexual (or I delude myself into thinking that) like a lot of people probably do as well. And now that I'm 22, I still enjoy being by myself, and I've lost the ability of romantic interest since the age of 18. So I have the inability to form a romantic relationship or anything sexual because they do not interest or drive me towards anything.
>>29003021
Surely you must have a reason other than "afraid of getting hurt" which is preventing you. Something substantial.
>>29003103
>when someone says they like me it turns into insulting myself for 20 minutes while they try to say "oh I'm sure its not that bad" until they give up.
That's exactly one of the situations I've run through in my head countless of times. The tricky part is that to be completely honest you'd have to open up to them, but opening up to a person that soon isn't wise.
>>29003021
>might not be able to do it the second time if it doesnt work out the first time.
it can definitely hurt enough to put you off from trying again. but for some people having those memories and experiences even with the sad ending is better than not having them
