>>28960918
this thread is retarded
og

>>28960938
You're most likely Virgin

i paid a Brazilian masseuse to take my v-card.

>be me
>be on bp, find masseuse lady
>arrive at her apartment, she has a setup in one of the rooms
>undress and get ready
>tell her im a virgin and ask her if she can take my v-card for extra
>she tells me she doesn't do this but since im a virgin she'll make an exception
>tell her she can do anything she wants to me
>she goes "anything?"
>i say yes, anything
>she comes back with a huge black strap on and gently fucks my ass
>i manage to take it all the way, it was like 10 inches or something
>i groan slightly and she pulls out, her pussy is soaking wet.
>she sucks me with a condom and i fuck her, cum in like 20 seconds.

when i got back to my car, i thought to myself "is this it? that's sex? at least i can say i got laid but really what the fuck."

>>28960918
>meet girl on okc
>talk a little about our interests, do some flirting
>she asks to hang out 2 days later
>meets me in my apartment parking lot at night
>standing outside her car smoking cigarettes and talking about everything from linguistics to physics
>say it's getting cold and suggest we sit in her car
>keep talking, she's touching my arm and stuff
>she says she's so small that she could probably sit on my lap
>make a joke that i have so much room despite being tall that i could even take my pants off
>she tells me to do it
>i do it
>she sits on my lap
>start kissing and groping each other
>she takes her pants off
>take my boxers off
>get handjob
>take her panties off
>proceed to have sex in her car for roughly 20 minutes
>tells me she's on the pill so i cum inside her
>kiss for a bit, says she gets up early in the morning so we put our clothes on and part ways

>>28960918

>go to uni
>being an anti-social asspie I'm only able to be friends with equally autistic people
>one is a fugly girl with crooked teeth and hairy toes, the other one is a 5'7" tall landwhale
>she is really fucking fat
>go make some homework at landwhale's place
>get really drunk with her
>we play "truth or dare" and we end up fucking

mfw I don't regret nothing.

bump
I'll post story in a second

>have a gf of ~6 months
>walk 5km to her house because she lives out of city
>fuck
Eh...

>>28960918
>16
>actually somehow have a qt short haired gf that gets nervous around me
>asks me over to her place to watch a movie or something
>fuckyeah.jpg
>get over to her place, we end up just watching Psych
>we're making out, she gets on top of me and takes off her top
>we awkwardly fool around for a while since neither of us actually knows what the hell we're doing
>I manage to get a condom on
>the sex is short, but satisfying
>she breaks up with me a week later, citing guilt (apparently I was a rebound)

I wonder what she's up to now.

>>28962447
I'd believe it.

>>28962276
I suppose.

>>28961158
You lost me at the strap-on.