I Met Eggman
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You are currently reading a thread in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001
You are currently reading a thread in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001
I'm not joking, I'm not memeing. Today I met Eggman. I saw him while I was working. He was with a 6/10 qt whom no man would be ashamed to settle down with. We had a little exchange but I didn't reveal that I knew his internet personality, since I had no idea if he had told his gf about it.
I was in the presence of a living, breathing meme. Nobody will believe me, but praise Mighty Kek.
No fucking way. How do you know it wasn't just a guy who looked like him?
>>28941443
greentext plz anon
uhujbhjuh
>>28941443
if i ever saw him i'd banepost and hope he finds it funny. where do you work OP? and are you in the twin cities or a suburb?
That is awesome even though hes a normie i still would like to meet him.
You were in Red Wing, MN eh?
>>28941464
No God would be cruel enough to make two men that ugly. Op is telling the truth.
I've seen her. She's 5/10 and has nudes on the internet. Her tits are tiny.
Wow, great blog reddit.
I wish you and eggman would both off yourselves.
I saw Eggman at a grocery store in Los Angeles yesterday. I told him how cool it was to meet him in person, but I didn't want to be a douche and bother him and ask him for photos or anything.
He said, "Oh, like you're doing now?"
I was taken aback, and all I could say was "Huh?" but he kept cutting me off and going "huh? huh? huh?" and closing his hand shut in front of my face. I walked away and continued with my shopping, and I heard him chuckle as I walked off. When I came to pay for my stuff up front I saw him trying to walk out the doors with like fifteen Milky Ways in his hands without paying.
The girl at the counter was very nice about it and professional, and was like "Sir, you need to pay for those first." At first he kept pretending to be tired and not hear her, but eventually turned back around and brought them to the counter.
When she took one of the bars and started scanning it multiple times, he stopped her and told her to scan them each individually "to prevent any electrical interference," and then turned around and winked at me. I don't even think that's a word. After she scanned each bar and put them in a bag and started to say the price, he kept interrupting her by yawning really loudly.
>>28942152
No wonder he had no friends
>>28942152
this sounds familiar
>>28942152
Same thing happened to me but with Ryan Gosling. How funny.
>not calling him out
Missed opportunity
>>28942152
>>28942576
this happened to me with Dave Mustaine
>>28942152
>>28942576
>>28942686
It happened to me too with Rick Owens. Must be some new trend among celebrities.
>>28942123
Who is she?
Oreganogomment
>>28942686
Of course the long haired guy mentions Dave Mustaine.
>>28942049
>>28941726
Yes, I am from Minnesota.
>>28942123
OP here.
Stupid women are responsible for their own actions and should stop putting nudes on the internet. However, despite this, if this is true that would still make me uncomfortable since I met her in person. Its always weird to me when memes affect my real life.
>>28942152
It's supposed to be electrical infetterance. Fix your pasta.
>>28941443
Any man who knows her would be ashamed to settle for her, let alone settle down with her. Eggman isn't a man though. Even he might feel shame if he knew all that she's lied about. Damaged goods girls deserve love too. But not at the price she charges.
Why wasn't eggman at work? Did he ride off in his busted up car?
>>28942092
Apparently he wasn't extending that courtesy to women.
>>28943462
His web celebrity status is why she's with him. She posts as "Eggy's gf."
You know she wants to tripfag as that so badly...
>>28943775
lol the female version of eggy is a solid 5/10
to be an ugly female you really do have to be FUCKING ugly
>when eggy responds to your snapchats
Well, I guess the only thing to do as this point is to post his gf, and all her nudes. I'll be waiting.
>>28942123
She is also a massive whore. Think /cgl/ slut but on an industrial scale. I mean that literally. I know Eggy was on the verge of suicide from his tfwnogf thirst, but why he enables her cucking him even now that she calls herself his girlfriend is beyond comprehension.
>>28943775
>Meagan
>eag
>egg
>>28943908
>>28943790
Does anyone have a picture of her? I want to confirm.
>don't know who eggman is
>look it up and read this
http://www.dailydot.com/politics/4chan-oregon-campus-shooter-frame/
>"in mid August eggman became self aware"
>read in Arnold Schwarzenegger voice
Kek
>>28944108
I just love how tabloids sell that we ADORE fucked up entities. Like we weren't fucked up ourselves.
>>28943775
Top. Fucking. Kek.
It's literally Meggman.
>>28944002
Anyone who ever met her on Omegle or Skype has their own nudes. I'd link the Imgur I know of, but she's so gross looking in those. How about a giant pic of her face where she doesn't look like she has Down Syndrome? You can cum all over it and pretend you're Eggman
>>28944002
How fat is she? Is she blonde? What were they buying?
>>28944318
she's a chink
>>28944353
She's white and looks like a mildly ugly 12 yo but apparently she's 18
>>28944258
>I'd link the Imgur I know of, but she's so gross looking in those
for fucks sake, just post the imgur. the uglier the better.
>>28944443
she said she was azn fampai. but yeah, 18 student, think she said she was from CA.
OP I'm sure he knew that you. If I were to come across a living meme I'd stare too long into his eyes that he'd know what's up.
If not, you should have dropped a subtle meme like make a smug pepe face or reference black pill.
>>28944258
I'd rather pretend to be one of her clients cucking Eggman when I do my cum shot homage
>>28944318
>>28944353
She wasn't asian. The girl I saw with him was a little chubby, white, with uneven teeth. My teeth are much worse so I didn't think too much of it.
>>28944475
Did we mention she's a pathological liar?
>>28944475
Student where? Of what? Eggman paying her tuition with his Paypal donations? Student means unemployed.
>Driving Around, King of the town
>Always got my windows rolled down
>You know, I'm the Egg Man
>>28944108
>became self-aware
Fuckin topkek
>>28944475
Why'd her back story even come up in conversation? IRL attention-whoring?
>>28943889
What's his sc?
>>28944511
>chubby
>uneven teeth
>6/10
Oh, anon...
>>28944758
I like chubby. And like I said. my teeth are pretty bad so I can look past it in others.
>>28942152
>copy paste this into google search bar so i can find the pasta source
>"you are performing illegal actions>"
>>28944443
Looking like she's 12 is why she gets paid the Big Bux by the rich Daddies she whores herself out to in those back room DDlg sites. Or so she's said to some Anons.
>>28943775
eggy became a trap?...damn son.
Eggman was fucking her way before she turned 18
Eggy is a confirmed pedo
>>28945089
Imagine you were eggmans gf and you had to look down at this face eating out your pussy
Or look up into eggmans eyes as youre sucking his dick
She is a future alcoholic
>>28945167
>>28945089
If you only knew the depraved shit she's done. Eggman might be the best guy she's ever been with. She is fucking disgusting for pretending to love him
>>28945167
Imagine you are the next guy she moves in with. You thought she was the innocent qt she claimed to be, but then you discover it was Eggman's herpes encrusted cock that has made sex with her like throwing a hotdog down a hallway
>>28945294
>>28945418
Are you guys talking about ashley?
>>28945418
I'd literally an hero I'm not even joking
>>28941443
Hey OP, was this the girl?
>>28945487
No but her names usually start with A.
>tfw eggman still needs to shave his balls
>>28945604
Those teeth look even
>>28945604
The hair in this picture is different but the face was very similar so it probably was
>>28945630
And his asshole, so the gf doesn't have to pick his pubes out of her snaggle teeth
This is what his gf looks like
You can't make out her face because theyre using a face swapping but you can kinda see what she looks like.
is this she?
>>28945677
5/10 but she's not fat so she has pretty high sexual value
>>28945677
>>28945604
So that hair with the other face after its had buckets of Eggman's cum rubbed into it?
>>28945726
she's a lazy gold digging whore in every sense.
>>28945715
Looking very Hermione Granger in that one. What's with her tiny nose and those huge lenses? Doesn't look practical or fashionable. Just cute
>>28941443
eggman looks like my uncle who also happens to be a chad. believe it or not.
>>28945743
Wtf I thought eggman was one of us I even donated to him when he most needed it.
Why is he being a beta cuckold provider to some dumb useless golddigging whore?
Man, I'm disappointed at him...
this world is cruel and unforgiving
>>28945789
she's self-conscious I guess
>>28945715
Source? Yep. Original.
>>28945807
Try this one now
Og
>>28945820
I hope this is a dump in progress. How'd you get these?
>>28945845
Sup eggman
Totallyoriginal
>>28945840
okay
jsajkdasjkdkjaskjdkjaskjdkjas
>>28945845
She sent them to me. I shouldn't have implied a dump I don't have much at all
>>28945888
>She sent them to me
When she was with eggman? Damn what a whore.
>>28945888
>dem pancake tits
Top kek
>>28945928
They're in an open relationship senpai
Eggy takes what he can get
>>28945928
Yeah, she wanted to move in with me, like she did with Eggman apparently. I really shouldn't post this but fuck it she was a liar.
This is sad, poor eggy has gone through enough.
The only normie i'll ever feel bad for. Is this really all that being a normie has to offer?
A hand-me-down roastie using you for your notoriety and draining the little money you have... It's enough to make you want to weep.
>>28945888
Did you draw in that 'fat' diagram or did she?
Kek
>>28945977
Pretty hot desu. Why can eggman get a gf like this and not me? Im in way better shape than Mr Wood
>>28946072
You need to be willing to drive your girlfriend to her job sites or pick her up at the airport when she's returning from an out of town gig sucking Jew cock. And then take her to a family picnic
>>28946049
That is obviously drawn by a girl
>>28946049
that was her. again: self conscious.
this is the last one for me. I might have more tucked away but it's gonna be too much effort and I'm pretty tired.
god, i never thought id be this pathetic, but i almost feel like id be greatful to have eggys sloppy seconds. thats what its come to.
>>28945977
She has hairy forearms like an orangutan
>>28946149
That little cat is so cute I want to rescue it from its owners
>tfw if you went to the casino like you planned after Soundset you could have met eggman
>>28946149
*BAAAAAAARP*
wew lad it stinks in here
>>28941443
Not that big of a deal.
Eggman came to my house once.
Cool guy.
Complete Chad tho
>>28946162
I literally got cucked by eggman once
It's not a good feeling
>>28946149
Are you sure that isn't Eggman's ass?
>>28947926
If you fuck a girl after she's been fucked by Eggman, did you get cucked? Or did you only get herpes?
>>28942152
I was actually thinking about how I haven't seen this pasta in a while. Good shit anon
>>28948982
Eggman fucked my gf
Fuck them both
>>28949008
Oh. I don't feel so bad that he's getting cucked now. Karma's a bitch and so is your gf Eggy!
>>28942152
>electrical interference
that is a word you fucking spastic cunt. Next time copy your pasta better. You actually can't even copypasta correctly without fucking it up and ruining it. Holy shit you're a failure. You should've been a jizz stain. You were probably a failed abortion because even your parents are failures. Cunt. I hope you get shot.
>>28945089
Eggman looks exactly like me, if I looked like a complete fucking mongoloid.
>>28941443
>He was with a 6/10 qt whom no man would be ashamed to settle down with.
this is what can happen when you leave r9k
>>28942744
Tiny Tit Tammy
>>28944955
Ha you're kind of right
