pic related
>sitting on bed
>mom comes in
>something in her hands
>she throws something at me
>mom yells "Take these, they'll be you friends"
>hear her mutter about how useless I am as she walk away
>pick up what she threw at me
>its bobble head turtles
the picture is the turtles, or my new friends I guess
What a strange way to express aggression.
Makes me want to dissect the female brain, they're remarkably bizarre and seemingly random.
>>28889320
Go away Jeb!
>>28889363
maybe shes mocking him by choosing a turtle bobblehead a turtle is slow, hides in its shell, a hermit. idk i maybe over analyzing things, im high as fuck. but either way seems like its a passive aggressive shot at OP.
>>28889320
I made a film of the situation in my head it's pretty hilarious
Time to move out, get a job, sort your life out?
op here. I think its more of the fact that she thinks I have no friends (shes correct)
SLOW
AND
STEADY
>>28889528
Here's what you do, fight fire with fire.
Be as passive aggressive as your mom, start treating your ceramic turtles like friends.
Take shots with the turtles, tell jokes to the turtles, go on joy rides with the turtles.
>>28889528
I have no friends either, but I maintain a good job, have a decent house and haven't spoken or seen my mum for months, or my dad for years.
>>28889592
This is pathetic. OPs life isn't a game.
>>28889592
that sounds great, i will try that (op here)
>>28889320
I wish I had your turtles, OP. they're very nice.
>>28889664
In not too many posts, I've gone from wanting the OP to overcome this and be a success, to feeling badly sorry for his mum.
Talk to the turtles anon and don't let your mammy ft to you
>Make thread to garner pity with elaborate self pity story constructing yourself as especially weak in a specific way.
No one who can manipulate like you is useless, OP.
Fuck off and stop fucking with people.
>>28889592
>Take shots with the turtles
Do this right the fuck now
Take pics and poast
At least they are better than what any of us can get in the real world. Oh, also make tuplas with each turtle, that probably would work well right?
>>28889639
Shouldn't you be getting ready for "da club", normie cum guzzler?
>>28889781
The triples have spoken!!
>>28889799
No, post >>28889618 is me.
>>28889320
What are their names anon?
this op. Im starting to really like these turtles. the slow, hypnotic bobbing of their heads are quite refreshing to see.
>>28889931
Mickey, darude sandstorm, tard lard
>>28890093
What's their personalities op? Are they really good friends? Buy a bad or something for them
>>28890122
Mickey is a smartass, darude sandstrom thinks hes too cool for everything, and tard lard is a fat retard.
>>28889478
>Hmmm, I haven't bragged about how I smoke weed to anyone today yet. How can I shoehorn this into what I'm typing?
>>28890166
(this and 28890166 are op) Tard Lard is also a sjw who frequents tumblr. Opps i triggered her.
oh no she found the rope. dont do it Tard lard!
>>28890257
...
Tard Lard committed suicide.
>>28890382
Light mickey on fire
>>28890382
It was super effective
>>28890414
never.
He's the only sane one of the group.
that and i lack the equipment to start a fire at the moment.
>>28890382
Fembot would have became a roastie anyways, better her to die now then ruin your life op
>>28890451
Law of the jungle. It was me or her.
>>28890485
They have cameras and microphones in them OP holy FUCK I fucking had this happen to me and I freaked out when I fucking found out, I had them on a fucking shelf and my mom started noticing things I did on my own and I thought it was weird and I cracked them open and they were full of little electronic parts.
They found a new friend, one to replace Tard Lard
>>28890640
He looks shady.
>>28890686
excuse you, he is a British gentlemen.
But his name is Bob?
(I think he's lying)
>>28889724
>feeling sorry for the one who failed him in development.
Don't have kids you don't know how to raise. You waste your time and their life.
>>28890637
Break them open.
>>28890807
you can see the inside from the leg and head holes. I checked the top of the shells and the bottoms.
Nothing.
>>28890853
>tfw i made you check
I would have felt bad if you broke them
>>28889320
Tell that whore to fuck off and kick her shit in for disrespecting you for no reason at all. Being a parent will not save them from the pain anon. They deserve it when they act up for petty shit.
Parents stop being cunts and be be responsible. if your not ready for kids and or don't want them stop fucking you miserable shit stains. Accept your children or don't fucking have any. Your fucking cruel and need to castrated for bring in a child unwanted.
>>28890210
>mfw the cliche stoner appears and mentions he's 420 blazing it for no reason
>>28889592
>how to get sent to the psych ward 101
>>28890210
>"bragging" about smoking weed
How old are you?
>tfw no bobble head turtle friends
>>28891085
You're pretty fucking retarded, 2bh familia. Did you read what he was replying to?
youre mom a cunt OP, at least the turtles are cute
>>28891203
> idk i maybe over analyzing things, im high as fuck. but either way seems like its a passive aggressive shot at OP.
Is this what you're talking about? Is this bragging?
>>28891281
Oh, I see... you're the one who typed it and now you're on damage control.
>>28891327
Not sure if you're being serious but that wasn;tme
I was vaping when I read your post, OP. Nice post, have you tried vaping?
>>28891400
Did I mention that I vape?
>>28891429
also im really high right now woweee
weed
Op hasnt posted turtle pics in a while, are you still alive op?
>>28889320
Are you going to give them names OP?
The fat one on the right looks like a Bob
OP is Jeb Bush from the past
bob killed them all after roofing them
I left the house.
I couldn't take the pain.
Bob wasn't a English gentleman.
>>28892161
I told you Bob was a shifty mother fucker.
>>28892161
Fucking Bob
Avenge them op
>>28892161
fucking bob, typicalop, i know it all sorta sucks but you've made this really funny, hadn't laughed in a while. Thanks mate, keep going, ride doesn't end
>>28889320
>>mom comes in
>>something in her hands
>>she throws something at me
>>mom yells "Take these, they'll be you friends"
>>hear her mutter about how useless I am as she walk away
wtf is she crazy?
>>28889478
>im high
fuck off normie
>>28889320
Is your mom Jeb Bush?
>>28892821
>that image
never fails to anger me.
If you gave me a button to launch all nuclear warheads in the world and fuck all shit up in a regular day i wouldn't do it, but right after seeing this image i probably would.
I came home.
Bob scares me.
He stares at me with deep, yellow, penetrating eyes.
He stares at me with those pupil-less eyes.
He scares me.
Darude Sandstorm loves him, his wooden eyes showing hero worship.
I feel he would follow Bob to the ends of the world and back.
He would do anything for Bob.
But.... then he was killed by Bob.
Even still Darude was happy.
I hate him, that Bob.
He has to go.
Grab ur moms ass to assert dominance
Good bye Bob.
Rot in Hell
Treat them as if they were your friends. It's not like you will lose anything from this.
Have you already decided on their names?
>>28893902
They're dead. Bob killed them.
But yes they did have names.
Mickey, Darude Sandstorm, Tard Lard.
>>28889363
*holds up spork*
Yes we are.
-Teh P3NgUiN OF D00M
>>28893954
Im slowly starting to hate penguins more and more
>>28892821
op could also be crazy, do not forget lunatics haunt these threads at night
>>28894069
im not crazy
>>28889829
newfags plz
>>28889977
>tripdubdubs
WITNESSED
GODSPEED OP
err
TURTLESPEED
Friends are Hollywood propaganda, don't worry about it op.
>>28894619
spoken like a real lunatic
>tiny ceramic turtles
is your mom Jeb Bush?
>>28895001
Probably. I should check.
>>28894619
Why are you killing your friends
>>28892821
That post in your image makes my fucking blood boil.
>>28892821
Females are the reason malware sites exist, because they are ignorant and so focused on their pleasure and fall for this kind of stuff. I hope that anon has recovered, I've been in and seen that "never blame the sister" situation before, and for some reason they promote it on TV and such
>>28890166
Tard Lard sounds like a pretty good hang tbqhfam
