I want to change my relationship with a friend to something else. It's just that I'm paralyzed by fear of rejection or indifference.
We only see each other few times a week during an organized social event, but it's always fun talking with her. I don't think she realized I'm the kind of guy who post on r9k.
I may have misinterpredted her signals because she is a nice girl.
Pic related
is nice girl
I guess it's not for today then
Well first off, how close are you to this grill? Because if you only see her at social events and never communicate with her otherwise, then don't do shit.
If you do/will talk with her more, then just fucking go for it. I'm gonna tell you a story.
> be me
> texting crush bc I'm friendly af
> ask her about movies
> "oh I love movies, anon!"
> offer to watch a movie with her over the phone bc neither of us could sleep
> "sure anon!"
> watched Babadook
> was pretty spoopy
> movie ends
> I was tired and I realized that this was fucking it
> do or die
> "hey, [grill]?"
> "yeah?"
> "do you maybe wanna watch a movie like... In person?"
> she agrees
> I don't even call it a date until I'm about to hang up and she doesn't have a choice
> we go to local AMC
> 7 months and counting
In conclusion, get friendlier and then just go for it. It won't jeopardize your friendship or anything so asking won't cause any negative effects.
>>28878318
>if you only see her at social events and never communicate with her otherwise
well I guess I should get closer to her outside of social events and that's the problem, I think she suggested we should meet each other outisde too but is waiting for me to take the initiative
>>28878483
Go for it anon, you have nothing to loose
>>28878557
friendship is something I could loose
>>28878754
Nananana
No grill would ostracize you just because you ask them out. It'll be awkward for like a few seconds and if she isn't into you she'll just say it, but that doesn't mean she wants the friendship to end either. Most grills would just say something along the lines of
> thanks but I'm not sure I really like you like that, anon... Would it be alright if we just stayed as friends? "
>>28878842
ok, should I be careful about where, how and when I ask her out ? Like, checking if no one is listening ?
>>28878935
I mean if you're shy about it or anything like that, then try asking her out in private, but don't make too big if a deal out of it. So nothing like
>please come to this dark corner with me away from all your friends, it's important
Try for something more like
> *it's just you two*
> "could I ask you something?"
One thing I would suggest is that you don't ask her in a public place or in front of her peers. That shit will either pressure her into a decision she doesn't want to make OR you'll end up a beta laughingstock.
Yep
you are right on track to being a friendzoned beta orbiter
Keep in mind that the situation you are in has been played out millions of times before. In fact, it's almost comical how cliched it is.
My advice? Just be a macho assertive guy about it. Ask her out, press her etc. Don't be worried about stupid shit like "ooh am I bothering her", "what if she isn't into me", "am I being a creep?".
If she's not into, she will make an excuse to get out of dating you. Girls are creative. They know how to reject a guy gently and clearly. Then you take that as a cue to move on.
The "I don't want to ruin our friendship" line is a stock phrase that orbiters throw around when they don't want to admit they are being cowards about it. We've all heard it a million times before and it's tired at this point.
Whatever happens, you don't want to turn into an orbiter. You don't want to live that purgatory.
Asking her out shouldn't be a problem, two people eating together at a restaurant? If she's a nice girl she'll probably say yes, and you'll both have fun even if it doesn't develop into something romantic.
And trust me, if you actually like her and enjoy her company, a rejection isn't a problem. It can certainly be a bit awkward between you for a while, but that will smoothen itself out over time. You'll continue being friends or you can ditch her, either way you can move on romantically and not be one of those who never dared trying.
2bh when womyn want a man they go for it, they give OBVIOUS signals, she will try to get your attention, she will call you out. If you want to know if she is into you? Talk about stuff women don't like ex: anime, vidya, sports. If she pretends any interest she's into you.
But I believe you gonna be cucked soon. I'm looking foward the ''I was cucked thread''
