What's your favorite lie?
I didn't shit in the oatmeal.
>>28867222
"I feel like Pablo when I'm working on my shoes! I feel like Pablo when I see me on the news! I feel like Pablo when I'm working on my house!"
>>28867222
that pedophilia in holywood doesnt exist
I often tell people that majoras mask is my favorite video game but I've never played it
Things will get better. I shouldn't kill myself.
>>28867222
You can't stump the Trump.
(ORIGINALO)
i like you for who you are
>>28867222
I'll do it later
>>28867222
>No, thank you.
Every time
I can totally eat all of this and not feel like shit immediately after.
>>28867222
It's not gay to like traps.
"l have a job"
I'm fineorig
>>28867222
Jet fuel can in fact melt steel beams.
I'm a liar. I lie about pretty much anything I don't like the outcome or reality of. I'm particularly bad about lying about things I intend to do before I've done them. I also procrastinate until the very last minute. I'm also a cheater. Most of what everyone knows about me, if they weren't here to witness it, is a lie.
I'm a smart liar, though. Many are compulsive, notorious and unbelievable. I have used it as a perfect solution to almost every problem, and I've gotten away with it every time.
"I'm not a virgin"
Fucking fug my mans
>>28867222
"I'm sorry."
(totally oreganoo)
"Jet fuel can't melt steel beams."kek
>>28867222
I'll get around to it eventually.
>>28867518
You've gotten away with it every time because you probably don't meaningfully interact with anyone and you're likely still in high school.
I prefer being by myself.
"lets see a movie, that'll be fun!"
I don't think I've made it through a movie in the last 3 years sober. I always buy a popcorn to split with my gf, buy her whatever drink she wants, then go to the bar in the theater get a shot of jack and a tall beer. I cant make it through another cape-shit movie without at least some alcohol.
She likes them because I know a lot because shes a comic nerd.
>boss gives says he'll give me access to system and to get working on it
>lie and say I've been working on it for 3 weeks
>realize he forget to give me access and I never checked
>>28867668
THERE IS NO ESCAPE
ORGEL
>>28867222
That I also think she's pretty hot.I haven't been attracted to much of anything since puberty left me alone.
>>28867222
>A boys favorite lie
I'm torn between "I love you" and "I'm not going to hurt you"
>>28867668
>huh boss I went to sign in today and my access is gone, someone must have accidentally reset the ports upstream of the mainframe and blah blah blah.... so can you give me access back?
>>28867270
Ouch
Too close homie
I'm a good person.
>>28867222
>I'm not lonely at all
That's the best desu
>"of course I don't have any feelings for you anymore"
missing her like crazy right now and apparently she doesn't give a shit about me
Every answer ever to the question: why do you want to work for us?
>>28867280
Its supposed to be a lie, so it should be you CAN stump the trump
>>28867222
>you're so funny and interesting
To a girl
>>28867268
this makes me angry.
douchebag! what is actually your favorite video game?
>favorite lie to tell
I used to take improv classes
>favorite lie to be told
I love you
>>28867222
I love you
Never really loved someone back. I've been broken up with a few times but I'm usually over it in about an hour. I guess I don't get attached to people easily. But whenever I say something really sweet, I don't mean it at all, I just say it to make the other person feel better.
>>28867222
"I like traps but I'm not gay"
>>28867270
i think this is what you call a daily mantra
>>28867518
Same. I've lied about almost everything, even on 4chan because i can't break the habit.
>>28867222
"I'm alright."
... ;-;
>>28867222
I love you
I don't love anyone, not even my parents. It bothered me as a kid because i couldn't love god and i thought i was definitely going to hell. I might have a mental defect but I don't have a capacity for loving others. I can cate about a few people in a weird way, but i wouldn't be sad if anyone i knew died. I probably wouldn't care at all except for my grandfather and robot uncle, because they remind me of myself so i empathize a bit. But really no one is similar to me, most people even here ridicule me for my moral beliefs, which boils down to believing in freedom and anarchy over stability and obedience. Which i guess sounds edgy or immature to most people.
I don't hate you
Of course I fucking hate you if you have to ask that
>>28867528
How has asked you if you were a virgin, anon-kun?
>>28868973
Nah man, it doesn't sound edgy. Just gay. You should make your uncle and grandfather kiss each other if you love them so much. Maybe you three lovebirds can triple kiss. You need to make out with your uncle and grandfather is what I'm saying.
pic related killed himself
>>28867222
doo doo smells bad because it would make us sick if we ate it, not because we would become too powerful if we ate it.
>>28868479
Majora's Mask
>>28867222
The Warren Commission
Juss bee yarself :^]
>>28867222
That we're all going to make it someday.
i dont lie to people
i dont even get how do guys even play girls and run game, i cant even talk to one
>>28867222
>What's your favorite lie?
Yeah.
>>28867222
>Sure, I'd love to hang out later
If anyone ever tries to get me to "hang out" or otherwise be around them for anything that is not strictly necessary for group projects, I engage in maximum damage control. After I generalize too much, happen to have too many conflicts, or I have "something comes up" enough times, they stop asking.
The reason I take the liar's approach is so that I'm not overtly rude and do not burn any bridges in case I need to work with that person in the future. I've verified this is indeed the case: those I have dodged still interact with me in the same manner and I have been able to work with them as I did before.
>I'll get it together soon enough
I just don't have the will to go on, robots.
>>28867222
I cleaned off my dickcheese earlier
>>28867222
>I am still a virgin
most common lie women have said
>>28870937
Christ, is that Bam?
a couple of my internet friends follow my tumblr account and i'm constantly posting depressing/suicidal shit. sometimes they ask me how i'm doing and i always say i'm fine, then immediately go back to posting about killing myself lmao
>>28867222
i only like women that have vaginas
I feel confident
>oregano
"how are you?"
"not bad"
>>28867222
"i love you"
nice trips btw
l am fine
>>28869505
>people still believe he an hero'd
It says right there in the song that he doesn't even HAVE a gun
"I think it will all be okay"
>>28868715
i never said i love you but i have said i like you and all sorts of compliments and everything
>mfw i was too guilty to reject a girl again and am now in a relationship i don't want to be in but hate hurting their feelings
>>28871471
>>mfw i was too guilty to reject a girl again and am now in a relationship i don't want to be in but hate hurting their feelings
Oh shit son we're in the exact same situation. Slightly chubby girl crushed on me hard, even her mother told me she was head over heels for me, so I let it happen.
>>28869744
god damn that cracked me up
idk I've never really talked to a girl let alone lied to one. I guess "yeah I've done my homework, home"
>>28871512
Fuck hate it when their parents come up to you and say "my daughter has a huge crush on you"
LIke wtf, I would never tell my parents who I like, and they would never ask
>no, i'm just tired
>Nah, I'm not depressed just cynical
>>28873176
>He has never told his mommy which girl he liked, so she can give you tips on how to get her
>His mother never told him bullshit tips like "Be a gentlemen, and be really sweet, and any girl would want you more than anythign"
This was the bane of my childhood, especially when girls would always go for the schoolyard bullies, and my mum would literally reinforce this idea that those girls are worthless, and eventually they would all want a smart hardworking and sweet boy like me
>It's totally safe
>I know exactly when it's communicable
>It's only contagious when I have outbreaks.
>>28867222
>my penis is 6 inches
