Friday night. /r9k/ night.
>yfw every night is /r9k/ night
I just want to wake up and have the nightmare be over
>>28865501
Is it possible to wake up?
When does it end famlamb?
Fuckin right. /r9k/ for lyfe
>>>28865522
I don't think we'll ever wake up, I think the only option is to sleep, to sleep forever, it'll never end. Sometimes I wish people would care, but why would they?
>>28865501
This has to stop, I can't take this any longer.
R9k morning, r9k afternoon, r9k evening, r9k night
There is no rest for the robot
>>28865482
>tfw ever night has been exactly the samefor the last 25 years
>>28865482
>tfw never sleep
>sisters started trying to make me go to bed early
>start arguing with me, hoping I give up
>they eventually leave
If falling asleep was this easy I would have no problem doing it.
>>28865654
maybe try taking some melatonin
>new friends actually invited me out to dinner for one of their birthdays
>mom and brother took out the 2 cars already
there goes my one chance of normie life
im not even neet, I just make minimum wage and cant afford my own vehicle
Im so tired of doing nothing. Is 1 friend too much to ask?
>tfw i've spent the last 5 hours thinking about maybe watching a new anime
>tfw I watch 3 min before i just exit and go back to looking at my empty screen
who here /drinking/ alone in parents house
>>28865774
i try to do the same thing anon,works sometimes,when it doesn't i try to keep my mind occupied with games,lots of games,just trying to fill the void in my life knowing i'm worthless
>>28865723
should've asked one of your friends for a ride
>>28865791
just cracked open a bud light lime. I'm a poorfag so I have to mooch beers from my dad and brother occasionally. Need to stop being neet so I can at least have alcohol to keep me sane. What kind of beer you like? Regular bud, Heineken or PBR for me.
>>28865654
I find it hard to go to sleep because I always have the feeling that I'm missing out on "something" if I would go to sleep this soon.
>>28865855
sad dubs
>>28865855
This used to be the case. Until one day I said fuck it and tried to go to bed at 12 am.I didn't fall asleep until 6-7 am.
Now I fucked up my sleepschedule to the point that I only sleep a few hours a week. at completely random times.
So the girl I fell in love with is going to Hawaii with her fag bf for a week, leaving today. It's pretty much over for me. If anyone is interested in the story behind this, just ask and I'll greentext it.
Friday night is only special for wagecucks.
Now it's the time to drown your sorrow from being a wagecuck in alcohol and prepare yourself mentally for the next week of slaver.
>>28865849
My favourite beer is heineken.
Though my drink of choice is vodka.
I mostly mooch drinks off my parents too.
I get really depressed when i drink a lot.
I'm seeing an escort tonight...
I have a girlfriend who is currently in another town than I (I have been placed in another town for 3 months for work).
I didn't even consider that my country would have escorts but when I realised how silly that assumption was I googled Australian Escorts and now I've found one.
I am not unhappy with my girlfriend by any means but I do have and have always had a strong desire to have sex with other women. I know it is a base and likely thinly veiled desire that will be torn down by the guilt of infidelity but at least if that's the case then after tonight I will be satisfied.
I've wanked already for today, planning to drink a few rums before she gets here and will wank again in the afternoon. I paid extra for the privilege of going down on her ass as well as her pussy which is free.
Wish me luck.
>>28865951
I like orange juice, apple juice is nice too, and cranberry juice
>>28865791
reporting in
orig
>>28866028
lol, what the absolute fuck are you doing here? you sound like a fucking moron as well
>>28866031
orange juice is good
>>28865937
Share it yo
>>28865482
im just waiting for my fucking stupid shift to be over to grab a beer and some deep dish pizza and die
>>28865619
Senpai it's time to get severely intoxicated and forget about the hell that we call existence.
>>28865817
If you got overwatch on PC, i'll play with you anon
>talking to some qt guy i met like a week ago
>he decided to stay in and play video games with me instead on going out and getting shitfaced
>hes way out of my league
aaaaaaaaa
>>28865482
I don't understand why in all these robautist pipe dreams the women are so fickle and can just stop on the drop of a dime if they're already into it. I understand they probably never talked to a woman before, but do they expect you have to keep up your social graces and put on a fucking show once you're in? Goddamn, the amount of stupid shit I blurted out drunk and about to do it/already in, and not one gave a fuck, because its happening, and who gives a shit. They also get hot and bothered, and can say/do stupid shit in the moment. Sorry for the meta faggotry m8s, just a thought
>Played Overwatch with 4 of my friends
Shit was good.
I wish I lived alone. Weed and anime numbs the pain. I don't know how I'm supposed to get a job that pays well enough to pay rent when I'm 21 with no experience at all, and embarassingly bad social skills.
Someone please save me.
>>28867239
read books and learn an instrument
>>28867252
I already play a few instruments, not sure how either of those things would help me.
>>28867297
it's the most fulfilling lonely neetdom, and good for the mind
Lads, would you judge a guy who was going out with a girl taller than him? Say 4 inches taller? Because I turned down a girl because of that (my only chance) and I feel like I fucked up
>>28865482
i'm doing something cool tonight
>>28867385
Nah. Pussy is pussy. Hope you didn't burn that bridge.
>>28867385
I'm a 5'7" manlet myself. I wouldn't date a girl taller than me. I can't blame you. Congrats on having a girl be interested in you m8
>>28867423
>>28867436
thanks man, but that was the one opportunity to potentially get a gf and I fucked it. wouuld just feel insecure desu
back to loneliness i guess
>>28865774
I relate to this a lot. My evenings are so dead, boring, miserably dull and grey usually. And I have a computer I can do so much shit on, and what do I do? Nothing. I barely do shit. I browse 4chan boards, listen to some music, maybe a couple other things sometimes but.. It all feels so repetitive and it's all just pointless shit that gets me nowhere. And I lack so much motivation to actually work on anything.
I'm just waiting for life to have more purpose, more goodness or just something to really do. It'll probably never happen.
Reminder that "check your privilege" means you need to take a look at yourself, inwardly to see how you are "privileged"
But if you actually do look inwardly, you won't find selfloathing, you'll find your own worth
If your thoughts result in you thinking lesser of yourself, it is always a result of other people
"privilege" is a buzzword
>tfw drunk, high, listening to black metal and smelling the delicious smell of roast chicken
fairly /comfy/ right now
She's staying the weekend at the nearby hotel for the anime convention
She's probably climaxing like crazy right now
>>28868583
never ever date weeb sluts, they are the worst
Can't get my new pc working, won't recognise keyboard and mouse on configuration screen, but works fine in startup bios? Fuck win10, I just want to play tf2 and feel young again. Ree.
Gonna fap, get stoned, play some vidya while listening to podcasts, eat my publix sub, get stoned again, watch a movie then go to bed. Not a bad night.
>>28867189
pastaz from reddit
every night is /r9k/ it's the same thing everyday
>Have blood disorder
>Can't socialize with other people because they keep asking me about my jaundice
>Reached breaking point today
>Cried for nearly an hour
>Parents told me to "change my attitude"
>I would give anything to be normal
>I lost my youth
That's what I did today
>>28868459
damn, wish I was there with you samson
>>28868729
what podcasts do you like anon?
This Friday night, I've had way too much caffeine.
I've realized that I'm not mentally ill, or if I am it doesn't matter. I'm just an unlovable piece of shit and I will kill myself someday (ha, I'm even procrastinating my ultimate fate) because I don't think I'll ever be a positive force in anyone's life and society doesn't allow hermits.
whee
>>28868459
what are you listening to specifically anyway?
Haha, jokes on you NEET, I work the PM shift till midnight
;_;
>>28865482
>Korpiklanni
>The Iliad, Achilles's BF just died
>Mount and blade
>Copenhagen mint, Grizzly long cut, and a wee bit of genuine snus
>Jaegermeister and beer nearby
>Chips and dip
>Been sick all week so cant lift/run/swim, but feeling 100% for the past day so I resume training tommorow
>Got a good witcher 3 game going
>Memorial day weekend
Im feelin ok tbqhladfamdesusempai
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PJwo6bMKBaw
>>28869371
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IVldOmbF02o
>>28868982
you really don't, my room is messy and nasty as fuck
>>28866028
>paying extra to eat an ass
Wtf m8
>>28866028
Does ass taste spicy? Mine feels spicy a lot
>>28869520
poles are so good at this shit
it's okay I lived with this one neckbeard who LOST a gallon of rotting milk and several boxes of unfinished mexican food in his room
>>28869691
ok wow, that is worse than my room
are you a qt gril?
>>28869691
So this one time I left a dog treat in my room and a little ecosystem of carpet beetles set up camp there. You could see the larva squirming in and out. Gross, but fascinating. I've cleaned up a bit since but there's probably more bugs that I don't care to discover.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
IT NEVER ENDS
IT
NEVER
FUCKING
ENDS
I GO TO SCHOOL TO ESCAPE THE STRESSES OF HOME
I COME HOME TO ESCAPE THE STRESSES OF SCHOOL
I CAN'T ESCAPE THE PURE MENTAL ANGUISH I CAUSE MYSELF
PLEASE JUST KILL ME KILL ME KILL ME
WHY CAN'T ANYTHING EVER GO RIGHT
WHY DOES NOTHING GOOD EVER HAPPEN
I CAN'T TAKE THIS MUCH LONGER
I HATE EVERYTHING SO MUCH
>>28865723
get a ride or walk faggot.
>>28870026
DRUGS DON'T HELP
I CAN'T MAKE FRIENDS
I CAN'T MAKE GRADES
I CAN'T TALK WITHOUT COMING ACROSS LIKE AN ASS
GIRLS DISGUST ME BUT I CANT STOP THINKING ABOUT THEM
I CANT BE ALONE ANYMORE
I CANT STAND IT
I CANT STOP THINKING ABOUT HOW MUCH I FAIL
EVERY DAY I GO OUT INTO THE WORLD AND DISSAPOINT EVERYONE
I AM SO WEAK
I FEEL USELESS
I JUST WANT TO DIE
>>28870106
"why don't you have a date to prom?"
"why don't you ever bring any friends home?"
"it's the weekend, aren't you going out?"
"I'm sure you'll get into every university you apply for"
"aren't there any girls you're interested in?"
"you didn't get accepted? It must be a mistake"
"did you get into any of them?"
"there's always the community college"
"did you get a call back from that job?"
"why are you always in your room?"
"don't you get lonely?"
"are you feeling okay?"
"you look tired all the time"
"why don't you smile anymore? I used to love your smile"
"you've been drinking a lot lately"
"are you depressed?"
...
>>28870106
are you me, oh my god
>>28870268
I don't think I have much more in me /r9k/. I don't think I can do it anymore. It's all just a big black hole that I'm stuck in. There's nowhere I can go, no one I can talk to. My parents died. My dog died. I feel like such a burden. I'm disgusted with myself.
>>28870268
>parents lie to you to make themselves feel better
>have to manage parents' emotions as well as your own
>can't even do the latter
SO NO-ONE TOLD YOU LIFE WAS GONNA BE THIS WAYYYYYYYY
>>28870026
>>28870106
>>28870268
>>28870318
Sorry for unloading. It all just feels so bad.
>>28870325
My mom was depressed for a while when I was. She would tell me she wishes she wasn't alive, and I'd have to talk to her until she felt better. I find it much easier to help other people with their problems. It's much easier to talk than to do.
>>28870294
Disappointment is my speciality.
>>28870438
I can't speak to fucking anyone without coming off like an asshole or a retard, drugs don't do anything anymore but I'm still hooked to them, and I'm the biggest disappointment in my family since generations
>>28867988
are you me? i literally need to get a job but everytime im close i just get so much anxiety about it i stop answering their calls
i literally just want to work a bit to save some cash and travel and just get out of this room for a few months
but for the life of me i cant seem to make the first and keeping a job
Just read the first bit of Oyasumi Punpun. Left me feeling pretty hollow inside. Went out to get some Cookout, and almost wrecked like 10 times cuz I was just letting my mind wander. I wouldn't have minded crashing if I meant I could have died, I just don't want to inconvenience anyone else. Not because I think their time is valuable, but just because I want to stop being a burden on people. A financial burden to my parents. An emotional burden to my family. A disappointment of a son who will never have his own family, never to bring new life into this world.
I'll never experience the joy of raising a child. Protecting it from all the shit that's going down in the modern world. I'll never have a loving wife like my brother. I'll always come home to this empty, dark apartment after getting fucked in the ass by greedy bosses and ridiculous customers. I'll postpone putting a bullet in my head for the sake of my mother. And when I do die, it'll be alone because who's going to care about me in 40 years? My brother? Kek, he's moved onto better things already. I'm just an afterthought of an afterthought to him. Oh well. This life was meant to be lonely for some people. Not everyone can have friends.
So this actually happened;
>Be me
>Have like 9 mins left until the boss in my favorite mmo spawns, character already at his usual place positioned ingame and waiting
>Decide to quickly bring some dishes from my room down into the kitchen and do a small supply run while i'm at it
>Put on mp3, aw yeah ready to roll out now
>Step outside hikki cave safe zone and into the wilderness
>Take a piss, it's going well so far
>Alright here goes
>Make my way downstairs
>Suddenly i notice that all the lights in the living room are turned on (our living room door is 50% see-through)
>See TV is running in the background too
>It's in the middle of the fucking night, just after 5am
>When i step inside the living room i see my mom passed out drunk there lying on the fucking couch snoozing away
>Empty bottle of wine in front of her as usual
>Her disgusting fat belly is made visible by her shirt which made its way up as she passed out
>She mumbles incoherent shit and demands i help her up, the lazy disgusting fat slob piece of shit
>Among other things i notify her of the current time, offer to make her a coffee, says nah she's good thanks
>Go upstairs again without having gotten any snacks, at least i got the bottle of cola though
>Boss in MMO already spawned at that point and killed my character of course, so i log out again
Often times when she's drunk the unstable toxic addicted drunkard cunt also eratically changes her mind about everything and starts screaming/creates trouble with me just for the heck of it, tells me to go away so she can drink alone and then pass out again, and then the fat cunt ends up saying the meanest things to me about how she thinks i'm a loser or how i should GTFO from the family altogether, stuff like that you know
She's always had her fun bullying me and fucking up the whole course my life with her stupid actions and obstructions at every single fucking turn, i guess this is just a posthumous continuation of that in a way.
Fucking character limit baka
>>28865482
>tfw come from school and post the same stupid shit
feels bad man desu famtaro xDDDDDD
>>28865482
>Start talking with a girl in uni
>We have a lots of things in common
>We talk almost everyday
>She invited me to see get a drink tomorrow
>Holyshitisfinallyhappening
>Thought it was going to be like a date and we were going to be the two of us alone
>Turns out she also invited a lot of her friends
I don't understand why destiny likes to play such cruel jokes, I don't even know If I will go now.
I'm at a concert alone waiting for a band to play. Should I try to talk to a grill?
>>28871139
get a beer or something maybe youll get the confidence to
working for 9 hours tomorrow
>>28871139
no desu grills r bad
>>28871134
Fuck that anon. If any of them has a dick game over. Stay home and fap. Its a better use of time
>implying
I had to stop playing video games because I had leftover fap material. If new shit wasn't coming out all the time I'd never fap.
Tonight I'm playing some blood borne with a can of cope. Might play some thief later. It's been a depressing summer so far
>>28871044
Has it ever gotten worse
I cant go out and have fun like the normies, ever since I went on the run from the law two summers ago. I cant ever shake the monkey off my back enough to have fun. im so disconnected
>tfw spent friday night shitposting
On nights like this, to distract me from how lonely I am, I like to get fucked up and do some mundane task.
Tonight I had a few xanax, a couple gulps from whatever swill I could dig up from the basement, and a smoke of weed.
Once I was good and impaired, I cleaned my room and rearranged the furniture.
The impairment makes me have to focus so hard on the task at hand that I forget my sadness.
the problem is that now my room has a place for people to sit but there's nobody to sit there.
>>28871256
I think I'm going to do that or watch a movie by myself, they're doing an old samurai film special in a local cinema, might go to watch something.
>I came back from playing basketball with friends a couple hours ago.
Am I making progress?
>>28870617
You should use the local work center. Worked for me and I got a part time at a baseball stadium
>>28871366
I definitely recommend going to watch movies alone. I saw yojimbo and sanjuro in Hollywood and I loved it
>woke up today at 5pm
>friends are on my porch waiting for me and have been for an hour
>do massive dabs and smoke blunts all day
im not even a normie
I'm smoking with my friends
I work baking cakes.
> feel gut and will fap tonite
>>28870617
We're the same person.
My anxiety stops me from doing a lot of things and it's so annoying! Mixed with the hopelessness I get and the sadness it weighs me down. I hope to get a job this summer or something though... if I can actually do that..
If I don't get a job, more stuff to do, etc then my bedroom will be a hot boiling hell hole this summer.. walls trapping me.
>>28871309
>>28871309
You mean her drinking habits over the years? Yeah definitely
This wasn't the first time i caught her passed out drunk downstairs in the wee hours of morning of course.
Usually when she falls asleep from binge-drinking she just passes out in the PC chair whilst streaming shitty soap operas, and then at some point she goes upstairs again and leaves the PC on overnight or i find her and wake her up at these unusual hours in the middle of the night/morning.
But this time around she seemed really fucking wasted, like i said the TV was still running even and i had to wake her up nonchalantly, she literally looked like she was unconscious with one of her arms just laying above her face and her clothes all over the place.
The thing is, she came much earlier than usual from work today too.
She regularly drinks in front of my room within the ironing room (which is situated right next to my room unfortunately so i can hear her getting drunk whilst watching TV and try to cancel it out with my headphones) for hours on end too and doing the ironing shit was one of the first things she did when she came home despite her never doing ironing work at weekends usually, so that's three extreme deviations from her proper schedule within one day when considering the fact that she was very late for work in the morning too.
As a whole though i'm always prepared for the worst of situations because i know how mentally unstable the cunt really is. Others are not aware of it as much, though it does occasionally shine through from her side. Most of the others are more or less ignorant fuckups too, though not alcoholics
I'm basically just looking for a way to keep the lid on all of this until i can figure out something better and more sustainable for my own situation, haven't seen any light at the end of the tunnel as of yet though, my dream would be to move into some cabin in a semi-rural area mostly overtaken by nature and become self-sufficient there somehow.
>>28872197
heres to us bro
getting over this anxiety and getting a job
lots of drunk nights ahead
>>28872238
>>28872238
Also like a couple years back she was looking for incest porn whilst sitting drunk in front of the PC and the next day the whole machine was locked down with one of those ransom trojans.
Took me a short while to fix that but when i did a checkup afterwards and saw the browser history from the night before i knew where the culprit came before. Of course she denied everything lel, but i still have the proof. That's also why i took one (shitty/shaky) picture of her being passed out just now because she's a high functioning alcoholic and everyone always denies/nobody believes me when i tell them about her being so severely alcoholic because they're never there when she spergs or passes out in front of me. She also gaslights me then and calls me a liar and that she would "never do such a thing" (drinking heavily) and "just drinks one or two glasses", which is a fucking lie of course but she hides the emptied wine bottles quite well.
It's an abstract kind of hell i'm living in right now
*i knew where the culprit came from
Jeez i need some breakfast now
>>28865654
>tfw narcoleptic
Waking up is my problem
>>28865501
I've been stuck here too long
>>28872368
if she's into you fuck her. she can't be that disgusting
>>28872447
>>28872447
Nah dude, it was daughter/mother incest porn she was looking for back then lel. And i only have one older sister
Also i almost puked now thanks
>>28872475
How's your sister doing? Does she have an equally shit life?
>>28872515
>>28872515
I guess you could call her "happy" in a very nondescript way, she's in uni (always got favoured by our parents with education/everything else and whatnot so she ended up there while i didn't) and hops around between cities frequently. She seems quite stressed most of the time but other than that she's your typical plebeian bog-standard liberal normie whore, like the others she's also in denial for the most part about my mom being a drunkard
>>28865482
>play wow
>want really bad that 2nd tier piece for my shaman
>no ones playing
>go to bed
>>28871302
Fuck that game was my childhood. I'm thinking of buying the first two since I never played those.
Also it's not really my life as such that's shit, it's the situation around it, the external factors which are inadequate from a quality POV. Everything is basically either falling apart or working against me and i'm just in the eye of this hurricane. I have most everything i could possibly ask for - Clothing, a roof over my head, good food, an intact family (on the outside at least). And yet i am perfectly aware that this is a golden cage i'm strolling around in. Breaking out of it would entail immense personal risks, and i need things to reallign in my favour and build up strength and determination for it properly for this to take place.
I feel like I'm ready do give up on having a girlfriend, but at the same time I feel like I haven't even really experienced what it's fully like.
All the relationships I've been in except for my first have been long distance. That first relationship only lasted for a few months so it didn't even progress more than seeing her naked a few twice and us both awkwardly trying to perform oral on each other even though neither of us knew what we were doing.I fucking miss being able to be with someoone physically and it hurts so fucking much. I can barely even remember what it's like.What the fuck do I even do?
>>28871387
Tell me about friends, how do they work?
