my mother has been losing her health very quick these past years
>few years ago she had a stroke that caused her retina to detach from her right eyeball and lens misplacement in her left
>after along time trying to salvage it, its too late for the right one its fucking dead and theres no helping it
>last Tuesday she went into surgery to place her left eyes lens back into place and sent home
on may 9th we'll have a surgery to remove her right eye.
iv been giving her the meds they give her for awhile but it was always just pills,but for her eyes they recently gave me eye drops;6 different ones to be exact after the surgery her eye of course is swollen and sore but i still have to give her all the eye drops,i have tried to barely touching her but it still hurts her and she tries not to cry because the salt in her tears burn,so she starts to tremble and wants to throw up
i feel just horrible knowing im causing her all this pain, and i can only imagine what shes going though
after the eye removal surgery ill have to put cream IN HER EYE SOCKET and clean it for her
this morning after doing all her medicine and letting her rest,she tells me
>"i know this coming year is going to be full of almost none stop pain and ill be blind for most of it until i heal,plus i'm going to lose my eye and ill look like a freak to my grandchildren,i'm really considering just ending it anon"
i seriously don't know what to do,its so SO hard seeing somebody who seemed immortal to you when you were younger in this condition,barily able to get out of bed to go to the bathroom or eat
That's the most depressing thing I've read all day.
I feel sympathy for you, my friend.
>>28850874
Get her pain meds. Keep badgering the doctors until they give her something strong enough to work. They also make very convincing glass eyes now, she won't look like a freak. Her grandchildren probably won't even notice.
Spend time with her, and not just when it's medicine time.
I'm going through a similar situation right now. My Dad has stomach cancer. Spent all last night and most of today vomiting. We ended up at the hospital and they pulled 1.3 liters of fluid off his lungs.
You're a good son OP.
Just remember Anon, this woman carried you for 9 months in her body.
Did you know that when the skeleton of a foetus is developing it takes the primary calcium from the skeleton of the mother, and that it's never replenished? (this is why women who are mothers have such high rates of arthritis/osteoporosis).
She legit gave her skeleton for you brah', when it comes to it putting cream in her socket will be nothing at the end of the day, I know you'll be able to brace yourself and just do it. It will become normal pretty quickly.
>>28850874
Stay in there man, don't give up on yourself nor your mother
>>28851062
This sounds like good advice, please do this OP, your post made me sad and I hope you'll both be okay :(
>>28851062
i am,we even have stress meds for hr
the doctor said that but she'll still be 4+ weeks without a eye then we can go to have it fitted and made
iv been trying but she says she just too sick and tired to be talking or moving so all i can do is make sure her eyes are clean and shes fed
>>28851133
im not complaining that i have to take care of her,im just scared that shes in the condition shes in now,also im her daughter whos 19,her 3 sons who are 22-30 are off having there own life and family while i'm here
>>28851219
Well you're a good daughter then, but I know you weren't complaining, just sometimes it helps to try and rationalise it from a "she would do the same for me in a heartbeat" perspective to try and remove some of the fear.
I know it's scary, but before you have to do anything I would try looking up some images of post-surgery results to prepare you for how it's going to look. Once you get going it's not going to be so bad though, and as another Anon has said talk to your mother about prosthetics because it's not like she's without options. Also eyepatches are pretty cool, I'm sure I've day she can be Grandma-Pirate.
>>28851219
How about anti-depressants? Maybe you could get a psychologist or something?
I know /r9k/ has a pretty low opinion of psychologists, but this is different. They can't fix someone who's been broken their whole life. They CAN fix someone who's going through some temporary shit.
Call your brothers too, get them to visit. If that's not possible get them to at least call her.
Don't give up! I'm not going to give up on my Dad, you can't give up on your Mom.
Best wishes to you, anon. I hope everything works out for the better.
>>28851314
im gonna be looking up videos on how to clean her eye out and what stuff do to later this week >>28851321
we're working on getting a therapist for her and shes been taking anti-depressants for awhile
also thank you to everbody whos saying good luck and stay in there,it means alot
Sorry to hear what you're going through. Just remember, it's only TEMPORARY. The next few months will be tough, but you will get through it. Everything you have done for her is/was selfless. You're a good person. Thank you for being there for her.
I partly get your feels OP. My grandmother (who was functionally my mother during my time growing up) got skin cancer, a large tumor on her head, which she accidentally ruptured, so now there's a huge fucking hole on top of her head where you can even see her skull in a small part. What's worse is that she tried to hide it from us, and ended up getting infected and even having fucking larvae eating her dead skin. For the first 2 weeks after literally every moment of consciousness was spent writhing and moaning in pain, also panicking and crying in shame whenever we found a larva and had to extract it. I've been changing her bandages and applying antibiotics ever since, it's been 2 months now.
>>28851482
Larva helps clean the wound, r-right?
>>28851482
Jesus Christ that sounds so much worse then i have it,im sorry to hear that
>>28851539
Yes, they only eat dead flesh.
So it's gross as fuck but at least they aren't actually causing harm.
>father has awful back pain
>goes and gets surgery 8 years ago
>they put a bunch of rods and screws into the bottom of his back
>didn't help, still hurts miserably
>other back doctors can offer no solace
>has to hunch over all day like an old man
>tells me if it gets worse he would just *imitates holding a gun to his head and firing*
Fucking scary, man. I feel so bad for him. Endless pain unless he's laying down on his back...
Best hope I have is that he becomes an awful pill addict. Already takes them daily now.
>>28851539
No it helps giving her more infection because it probably came from the flies that gather around the dog poop in the backyard. 2 straight months having to clean pus twice per day. I think the infection MAY have subsided now.
>>28851553
It's probably just about as awful, at least it's an easy type of cancer to remove with surgery and eventually the wound will be closed, I'm sorry about your mother outright losing an eye.
>>28850874
>i'm really considering just ending it anon
Fuck. Must have hurt a lot to hear that
>>28850874
robro I feel you.
>dad is an alcoholic asshole
>literally scum of the earth when I was 12-15
>called my mom a slut on the daily, spit on her ect. but nothing physical
>hated him
>ff
>18 years old
>move out with gf of 4 years, don't know how I got her
>in college, almost done with bachelors
>he has a stroke and a coma
>back surgery
>heart attack
>developed pancreantitis
>diabetes for good measure
>things going good for me, perfect relationship
>notsofast.exe
>gf breaks up with me
>drop out
>have to move back to literal hell hole home
>realize my dying father was right all these years, he just has ungrateful children and a whore wife
>have to watch him die alone in this run down household
I always knew watching your parents die would suck but man I understand you on some different levels.
Keep up the good work OP, you are a good son.
