OH SHIT HERE WE GO FAMALAM
Get in here nigs
You got dis, brobot.
>>28783401
Get nudes plox
>>28783401
>doing pretty good. Would feel better if you were here beside me.
t. Doesn't know how flirting works.
Bump, hoping you are not a fucking retard like our previous host.
>>28783465
I'm stealing this. I used to be able to come up with this shit, then I became fucked emotionally.
One of these days, I will become half a Chad!
Her profile is "coffee. snob. Scorpio."
I just booted up warframe too didn't expect her to respond
>>28783401
What is that? Tinder? And what is the 4chan logo in the top left of your phone?
>>28783535
That's clover senpai
The best 4chan app after party van died
>>28783535
hey welcome to /r9k/ dude
>>28783556
I see, thanks. I don't use any 4chan apps, I hardly use my phone. I use 4chan on my computer.
>>28783558
I hardly ever use phone apps, what the fuck is your point faggot?
>>28783465
I don't know how flirting works either. When they build bots that generate what line I need to say next, things will improve I'm sure.
>>28783527
>double message this early on
You fucked up, faggot.
Oh fuck dudes, I did not think this through
>>28783654
Tell her that you browse /r9k/ and fap to mlp like the filthy degenerate that you are. Honesty is a good thing, anon. I believe in you.
>>28783654
You like baking as well, don't you Anon? You guys should bake together.
>>28783654
playfully ask her to bake you something on your cruise ship with her fave band playing
>>28783696
How did you know anon? I read your post after I replied
>>28783734
>being this much of a massive faggot
>>28783749
Let's GOOO
Get it in nigger.
dont beat around the bush, ask for nudes already
>>28783763
Why are you such a faggot? The way you type and the things you say just scream that you're an enormous fat fucking faggot.
Did she mean baking as in marijuana or cupcakes?
>>28783800
Why not marijuana cupcakes?
Just be urself OP
XDDDDD
>>28783785
2nd
Origami comment
Pizza works everytime
>>28783866
Ask for shoe pic.
Dudes why am I so bad at conversation
Shoes to tits in one step it'll be a new world record
"Only the shoe"
>>28783949
>pizza is not for the ground
For some reason this feels like it'd end up being a meme.
But let's see where you go with this man
>>28783949
>Pizza is not for the ground
if she's cool with that ask for nudes
>>28783949
Better than calling her a monkey for eating with her feet
>>28783527
>coffee
>snob
Ask her if she currently has any beans. Then ask her what the roast date on those beans is. If it's longer than two weeks, flip shit. Even worse if she buys pre-ground Then ask about her brew method. If it's chemex, make fun of her for being a cultist. Ask what temperature she sets the water to for extraction. If she just sets it to boil, give her shit for using water that's too hot and ruining the cup. If she makes espresso, start quizzing her on how to use the machine.
>how do you know when the milk is hot enough
>how is a cappuccino defined
>how many Newtons of force should be applied to the grounds in the portafilter
>does your espresso machine even pre-infuse
and so on
If she gives wrong answers, start giving her shit
>>28783955
This
Originalimisimo
>>28783968
Fuck are you some kind of normie
>>28783983
She's a coffee snob, not a coffee autistic
I can't into new topics
>>28783654
Get her to keep talking about her interests. What sort of music does she like, what concerts has she seen? What is she studying in school/college. Be interested in her life
>>28783866
>I've got pizza stains on my shoe
This warrants a "and you'll have cum stains on your pillow after I blow a steaming load all over your face."
>>28784018
Nah bud keep talking about the shoe, see how long you can drag this out
Aaaaaagh
Aaaaaaaaaagh
What have I done
>>28784027
He needs to go full autist and just start researching shoes now. Just start listing off every type of shoe, types of shoelaces, different manufacturing processes that are used to create shoelaces, the raw materials required to make shoes and laces, number of shoes produced by each country on an annual basis, and then top it off by sending her a spreadsheet that contains aggregated personal reviews of 20,000 different types of shoes based on parameters like color, texture, comfort, smell, and like 100 other variables.
>>28784067
OP with the nuclear option
>>28784067
>pice
>>28784075
Start the spreadsheet now OP you don't have much time.
>>28784067
Now you have the option to correct it to "piece" or "pic"
Oh shit guys
>Sweatingman.jpg
>>28784120
Sperg out and say: "Whoa! I didn't think that would work (hahaha). You would really have sex with me for getting shoe laces! Good golly! *Chuckles* I guess you're quite the catch lol! ;)"
>>28784154
You're clearly an expert at talking to women, get the fuck out of here Chad.
>>28784120
Get nudes she's into you friendo
>>28784120
Exchange cheap laces for nudes, nice job OP.
>>28784154
This but replace the *chuckles* with *blushes*
Am I giving her false expectations?
>>28784120
try and add in lace panties and how you would like to see her wearing them.
>>28784254
how long are you going to continue this for?
>>28784254
probably, but go for the gold anon I believe in you
>>28784261
Fuck that's way better
>>28784267
I don't know ;-;
>>28784010
holy shit manogrengao
How do I get back on topic?
>>28784328
Ask her if you can jack off to her while she bathes in KFC gravy
>>28784328
"what about light up panties?"
>>28784328
ask her for nudes to warm up your shoe laces machine
>>28784328
What is your endgame?
because if you're trying to get nudes then i think that ship has sailed
>>28784358
This desu
Mucho originalo
>>28784328
say "would you do me?"
Stop fucking around faggot this is how u get friend zoned. Say something along the lines of alright let's meetup when are you free
>>28784328
you can still salvage this. if shes willing to give sexy times for shoe laces, it prob wont be that hard to get nudes
I haven't sperged out this hard in a while
>>28784400
i was only joking dumbass, abort mission!
>>28784400
>he actually thought he had a chance
>>28784400
Say "I got some and you can go home with em but only for a price"
>>28784400
Abort abort abort abort
We have a level 5 autism breakout REEEEEEE
>>28784400
>>28784410
>she says yes
>>28784400
Kek wills that this anon will get nudes tonight!
Oh god please
Oh lord please
>>28784400
Wew lad
That went from 0 to 100 real fucking fast
>>28784444
quads of autism
>>28784444
>quads
anon you fucking got this, luck is on your side
>>28784444
Tbh good save. Now she's on the spot and you can get this over with already
>>28784444
>Triple message
Stop!
>>28784444
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHA
>>28784400
You fucked up OP don't expect a reply that doesn't end with her calling you a creep
>>28784444
Maybe the quads will help you reach HER quads.
>>28784444
Can he get the succ??probably not, don't kid yourself OP
>>28784444
jesus christ you never double-text, let alone triple-text you imbecile.
>>28784444
fucking hell, infact I may make my own thread like this with the once match I have. Anyone wanna tell me what to say?
>>28784444
If she says yes Godspeed anon, godspeed
>>28784444
Checked that bravery
Aside from the triple message, pretty good save and I think u got a chance
>>28784444
There goes the spaghetti!
>>28784444
Maybe those lucky quads will help, otherwise you're probably fucked.
>>28784480
OP here
Don't do this you'll fuck it up
>>28784480
if anybody is gonna help you get laid its going to be a bunch of virgin neet cucks
>>28784444
FUCKING GET IT ANON THOSE QUADS WILL GIVE STRENGTH
>>28784444
>WHY CAN'T I GET A GIRLFRIEND /R9K/??
>GOD I HATE WOMAN
>WHY DO WOMAN HATE ME?
every thread that I ever see on r9k I will think of these posts and know exactly why
"PIZZA IS NOT FOR THE GROUND!!!" im crying
OP post another picture of her not talking to you, for posterity sake
>>28784444
May quads help you
>>28784444
And this is probably a good example why most on 4chan seem to always post about have issues getting gfs....
>>28784444
No! You escalated too fast. The real trick is to keep up a conversation for a day or two, and then ask them out.
>>28784444
Have you ever dropped your spaghetti so hard that you got quads
>>28784488
We should start calling it pizza
>anon's pizza spilling out of his pockets
>"pizza is not for the ground!"
/o/ normie here, blessing this thread
>>28784510
>robots are robots
no shit faggot. normies out REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
>>28784516
I'm fucked, well it was a good run robots I'm gonna go cry
>>28784480
Yes do it, I will help you. Just post her pic and bio and we can go from there
>>28784536
2nd for /o/
It's over, guys. He fucked it up.
>>28784543
Post it, OP. You have nothing left to lose.
>>28784543
Ah well, at least you gave us one of the most entertaining threads I've ever been a part of.
>>28784543
Do NOT send that
>>28784543
DO NOT SEND THAT, 3 unreplied messages is already too many, be patient and wait or give up and move on
>>28784543
She's probably sucking Chad off bro, giver her a few more minutes to reply
Holy fuck...he spilled it boyos...delete the app and throw your phone in a jungle somewhere.
Tell her that you had a connection and that you'll track her down and find her and you'll be together forever and ever.
>>28784563
>>28784562
I'm not gonna send that, I'm going to close tinder and go to bed
>>28784543
you had a good run. You awkwardly triple texted her now its game over
>mfw this thread
OP plz
>>28784543
You new gen faggots have no patience. It's not that you sperged out(which you did), it's that such thinly veiled and lame chit chat only to be followed up with desperate sexual topics is unimpressive and pitiful in general. As rampant as it is these days kids still follow this like formula.
>>28784543
Send it OP quads for each message sent and you'll get laid for sure!
But probably not, no hope in here.
>OP is doing well
>he completely and utterly fucks it up out of nowhere
OP you did it on purpose, there is no way I believe you dropped your spaghetti THAT hard, you don't want a gf so you self consciously set your self up to fail, this is your fault
I really do hope she responds and you can salvage it
>>28784543
not saying
okay first off, you insinuate that you will have sex for goods, and now you refuse to speak to me. Im ashamed that I (again) was naive enough to even give you the benefit of the doubt.
Good day, and I hope your shoelaces grow mold and you die.
>>28784543
The last post you can make is to link her to thread, maybe she'll find it endearing..?
You don't really have much else to list desu
>>28784607
This is the first time I've attempted flirting since I got dumped by my oneitis 5 months ago
I am THAT much of a sperg du-
WHA- WHAAAAAAAAAAAAT?????
HOLY SHIT GUYS HOLY SHIT GUYS
>>28784648
wew
wow
phew
ho
>>28784648
HOLY FUUUUUUUCK HOLY FUCK HOLY FUCK
ANON YOU FUCKING MADE IT
>>28784648
OP HAS MADE IT
OP CONFIRMED FUCKING CHAD
GET OFF MY BOARD REEEEEEEEEE
>>28784648
You dont deserve your luck so don't fuck this up
>>28784648
>5 months ago
try flirting after 3 years Faggot
GOD SPEED ANON
GOD FUCKING SPEED
>>28784648
NOBODY FUCKING PANIC
>>28784648
Nigga the quads blessed you
>>28784648
Told you nigger
>>28784487
>>28784383
Me btw
>>28784648
>post yfw she probably cancels on him at the last minute
>>28784648
This is almost as unbelievable as the other tinder thread going on right now.
>>28784648
R9K 1
Society 0
>>28784648
MEME MAGIC BOYS
>>28784648
>>28784648
That's not fair. You probably are a 7.5-8/10 guy who can disguise as a chad. Mix that with texting and it's done. Ugly robots like me can't do that not even on our dreams
>>28784648
wew fucking lad
good shit anon, and godspeed, you got this far, don't sperg out when you meet her
>>28784750
pull
pull it failed buddy
>>28784648
>dfw 4/10 and it would've been over at
>>28783401 in my position
>>28784771
It's nut fucking fair fuck genetics!
REEEEEEE!!!!
>>28784771
>tfw skinny manlet
It would have been over at pic related for me m8
>>28783971
>>28783949
>I threw it on the ground
What a wild fucking ride
I will turn in my license in a following post
>>28784809
i know that feel brosef
>mfw every other skinny guy is at least tall
>>28784840
Op here
I would like to donate my robot license to a more deserving anon than have it be tarnished by the amount of female interaction I just had
I will still be lurking fellow anons, godspeed and may the quads be with you
>>28784840
You stumbled at the middle but you clinched it like a champ, and that's all that matters. Barely anyone who makes these awful normie tinder threads can say the same.
Congrats buddy!
Now get the fuck off my board.
>>28784809
I'm 5'8" and weigh like 130lbs
It's obvious in my pictures, there's hope for all of us
>>28784874
Then you have a nice face
>>28784874
Stop it I don't need hope.
I'm just going to convince myself that your face is much more handsome, so I can justify doing nothing with my life
never forgetti
godspeed op
>>28784840
Congratulations you normie faggot
>>28784861
>Pizza is not for the floor
Fuck you OP
good thread mates
>>28783968
this was an unexpectedly good move for you
Good job you bastard, hope that girl is a guy and you choke on that dick
>>28784444
how did you fuck up so hard with quads
>>28784840
>op actually sinks the buzzer beater half court shot
>pizza is not for the floor
>>28785196
Pizza is (not) for the floor
Please save and distribute freely
>>28784861
10/10 you magnificent bastard.
I hope everything works out.
>>28784809
>warframe app
>still climbing the grindwall
>>28783401
I have yet to laugh
>>28784840
The absoIute mad man. You'll be fine.
>>28784840
Good luck OP!
Be funny and try to flirt a little but don't go overly asshole. I tried that with my now-wife and she said she just about dumped me over it.
Also, talking is good but consider adding some sort of activity. Do you into beers at all, or wine? Could do a sampler somewhere.
The absolute most BALLER date I ever took my qt on in the beginning was to a showing of Alegria, on its last tour. She absolutely loved that shit and had never been to anything like it before. She still brags to her friends about it.
>this kek
thread
>>28783866
>I have spaghetti stains all over my pants
