tell me how to kill this thing so I can sleep
how big is it?
If you're scared just spray it with various chemicals and change your sheets. Just beware of the spooky movements it will make in death
>>28668947
>not owning bug spray
retard
>>28668947
Straya never change
Catch it in a cup and let it outside.
Be a man. Do the right thing.
>>28668983
4 inches at least
>>28669018
I'm from New Hampshire..
Spiders are your friend. Do NOT kill it. He will keep the shitty insects away.
But if he's intruding on your personal bad space, move it someplace else.
>>28668947
Put a cup over it and stick a paper underneath. Carry contained arthropod to the outside world. Let free in outside world. Sleep.
IT'S NOT THAT HARD, OP
>>28669061
It takes much less time to just squish it and throw it in the trash though.
phased plasma rifle in the 420 watt range
frying pan that fucker
>>28669037
>I'm from New Hampshire..
hey me too!
>>28668947
Just try covering it with that tupperware and dump it off outside
But IMO for really fucking annoying pests just keep a can of permethrin spray around
Just mist them lightly and in a minute or so they'll be twitching on the floor dead
move it outside, don't kill it
>>28668947
Leave him alone you monster.
>>28669079
Well if its like 4 inches at least, like op said, it won't bite if you dump it outside. Also why would you want to hurt such a cute animal.
>>28668947
>A spider every ten feet.Give up.
>trapped a giant ass fly on my back porch in a window
>grabbed the wasp killer spray
>went outside and sprayed the fly through the screen window with poison
get poison spray
>>28669032
fuck that, he'll just get back in
>>28669061
>>28669124
tried scooping with bin in pic but it fucking bolts.
Its fangs are wiggling now.
>>28669199
Not if you keep the windows and doors shut like a fucking civilized person. Also, spiders don't live that long, so it might die before it ever has a chance to go back. Let it enjoy its last days, op.
>>28668947
Put it outside. Spiders kill all the annoying insects for you, so he should get a pass.
>>28669214
ask >>28669101
to kill it for you
>>28669214
Put the bin on top and put a paper under the bin. Turn over and you have captured el spider.
>wahh don't kill it it's inhumane throw it outside
they aren't even fuckin sentient
>>28669236
Spiders like the op can live for at least a year if nothing like a predator or something kills them first.
>>28668947
>be Australian
>get cucked by an insect
What a pathetic landmass why did we ever let you kangaroofuckers make a country
>>28669262
They are sentient, but they aren't sapient. All sentient means is that it can use it's senses to feel things and whatnot.
Someone on /an/ schooled me about it once
>>28668947
its a tiny fucking bug OP. your literally 100x his size think about it damn
>>28669313
he already said he was from new hampshire
>>28669313
>>28669332
Spiders are not insects or bugs, Ameridumbs. They're arachnids.
The "paper and bin" option has failed twice and I don't have anymore hornet spray.
Should I axe + lighter? got plenty of fire extinguishers.
>>28669353
Bug is a general term for terrestrial invertebrates.
>>28669353
but arachnids are a family that branch off the bug tree anon
>>28669370
just spray it with the axe
>>28669037
>tfw there are spiders bigger then my dick
Spider is your friend. Just because it's creepy looking doesn't mean you should kill it.
Should we kill creepy looking autists?
>>28668947
gas it
originaux comment
Just smash the fucking thing with a shoe, you idiot. Are you mentally challenged?
>>28669293
I looked it up and I think it is a Carolina wolf spider, which can live for up to 3 years. I may be wrong in my identification, but I doubt there is much variation in the lifespans of medium sized spiders like that one. Anyway, I was wrong. Thanks for correcting me, you learn something new every day!
>>28669413
what if it lifts the shoe and beats op to death?
>>28669443
That happened to my uncle, don't use a shoe, op
>>28669443
op better make friends with it and fucking win the noble peace prize for finding the coolest spider to ever exit, teach it to speak human
>>28669443
What if it shoots web up on op's face and uses it as a grappling hook to climb up, bite op's eyes out, and eat op alive?
>>28669460
>>28669464
>>28669460
what if spider is the op?
>>28668947
>sweep into cup
>put paper over cup
>take cup to back door
>open door
>empty the cup outside
Now the spider is gone and your spiderbro will eat annoying bugs
>>28669538
d e e p
It's fucking original
alright
just because of all the autistic spiderfags shitting up the thread, next time i catch a spider i am going to tear all of its legs off and let it starve to death
>>28669581
Tfw my spiderbro is still in my garden eating all sorts of crazy shit thats attracted to the greenery
>>28669538
>op trying to the man taking the picture
>>28668947
SMASH THAT NIGGER
>see spider in corner of room
>ignore it
WHO /MADMAN/ HERE?
>>28669054
Wait, there are shittier insects than spiders ?
Okay guys, I used tongs to grab spidey and threw it in a pot of water so it'll stop jumping.
Dump outside or boil to death?
>>28669705
>not uploading a pic of swimming spider
>>28669705
Dump outside, faggotmy oc do not steal
>>28669677
>spiders
>insects
Pick one, mong
>>28669753
I hate people like you. You know what i meant, stop focusing on other thing that doesn't matter.
You're on a gook board run by a gook so fry it up like a gook and have some good eats you gook.
>>28669705
Boil it don't listen to these spider sympathizers it invaded your home for the sole purpose of harming you. Spiders are pure evil
>>28668947
don't kill spood you overgrown faggot
>>28669018
of course he is, us aussies arent scared of them
>>28669797
There are plenty of other much worst "creepy crawlers" in your house hold, for instance a centipede will give you nightmares for weeks if you see it in your house and it gets away, cockroaches carry many spooky diseases, so does mosquitoes but they also carry STDs.
In short don't kill that spider, I don't recognise it as a venomous spider either, if you're 2 spookt then release it outside your house mate'o.
>>28669904
Hate same faggin but the other day I literally carried a ~3 inches spider on my hand and placed it in our outside garden only because it spookt my little sister, I were fine having him around, he didn't cause much trouble in the first place.
>>28669827
I disagree, without spiders laying their webs around your house will be filled with dangerous or just annoying insects.
>>28668947
Don't kill it, you retard.
Force it to enter a can or a pot and throw it on the garden.
>>28669705
boil it
indoor spiders are fucking worthless cunts
Fuck spiders. All the tumblrina bitches in this thread saying "omg don't kill it take it outside!!!".
Just kill it. Don't be a fool.
>>28668947
Put borax in some water and spray the little fucker
Anon, you're going to have to move
I would start shopping for a new place to live immediately
>>28670193
t. mosquito
Call an orbital strike on its coordinates. Or you know, just grab a cup and put it outside or in a neighbor's lawn. It's not likely you'll see it again either way.
>>28669054
this trip loser is right keep the spider alive
try to find more spiders and breed an army of spiders and unleash them during your beta uprising normies fear spiders
>all these faggots ITT saying they'd kill a spider if they saw it
All of you pussies deserve to get malaria from mosquitos. Nearly every spider literally cannot hurt you even if it tried to bite you, we just want to kill flies and other annoying pests and this is how you treat them?
>>28669081
hilarious hahaha :)
>>28669705
dont be a pussy, boil the spider
>>28669705
boil it and post video evidence
>>28669383
>>28669388
>doj getting schooled
How unusual.
>>28670408
>we just want to kill flies and other annoying pests
>we
Nice try spider.
>>28669383
>>28669388
>>28670612
Bug is a synonym for insect, and spiders aren't insects, mongoloids.
>>28668947
Meh just drop the bomb.
>>28670716
Doj is a synonym for giant faggot
>>28670990
btw I'm gay lol xd
>How do I kill a spider?
>80 replies
This fucking board...
>>28670990
I am straight.
>>28671007
We know.
drop the tupperware container on top of it, slide a magazine under it, flip the whole thing over, and throw it all outside from the doorway and quickly slam the door like a man
>>28671023
I think you should know that tripcodes got leaked again recently. As far as I know, yours wasn't, so...
>>28671071
You don't say, Anon?
>>28668947
febrez it to death
