>tfw you push everything away due to insecurity
We have each other.
I may not know you, but to me you are the cute anime girl in your image. And I'll let you know that I find you endearing, and I would be willing to work for the rest of my life for you.
You're worth something, anime anon.
In another life, maybe both of us will make each other happy. Or who knows, maybe in this one.
Love isn't well measured in time, but in depth and intensity. For however brief our love is, and however much time we spend mulling over each other's post... Know that for these moments, I love you. I love you, OP, you are my world.
>>28645120
is this pasta?
i'm not an anime, i'm a skinny loser ugly NEET
>>28645229
Its not pasta, I wrote it for you, OP.
If you want to talk, maybe we can find a way to contact each other?
>>28645507
good, get a room gaylords.
>>28645036
knew a girl like that. people like you are hard to like or even be friends with because you intentionally sabotage your own relations with those people. which basically means only you can solve these feels.in pushing away, you choose to fail. If you ride it out, there's always a half-chance
>>28645507
i guess i could add you to steam or something
you're triggering my insecurity though
>>28645748
link me your steam and I'll add you
>>28645036
She looks like my 3D waifu. I wish i could have the balls to add her as a friend on faceboom.
>>28645673
>you intentionally sabotage your own relations with those people
It only looks that way from the outside. The process is almost entirely subconscious and a force of habit. I only catch myself if I'm paying enough attention or in hindsight. I guess the way of dealing with this problem is the same as fixing any bad habit, by conditioning your mind to catch yourself more and more often with practice, until that lets you unseat your old habit with a better one. But maybe my theory is wrong, in which case I was only pretending to be retarded.
>>28645036
I would know that feel
but I pull misery close
as tightly as I can
I want something familiar so badly
I need it
it can't leave me
>>28645036
kill yourself then if it sucks so bad
>>28645850
sorry i can't bring myself to post it
>>28646006
that's part of the plan
>>28646102
>sorry i can't bring myself to post it
Ok. I'll accept your feelings. Good luck, and remember that you'll find love. you are cute. I'll keep the thread open until 404, in case you change your mind.
>>28646211
Thirsty. He'd just push you away anyway. That's what they do.
>>28646246
What matters is the time we had, not how long it lasted.
>>28645673
Not a grill, but a 27khv. That's pretty much my life. >>28645908 is right in that there is a certain amount that happens on a subconscious level, however I know I'm doing it. At one point in my life I tried to get better, so I learned to catch all the thoughts. However, the problem is that I see no reason why I should change them.
It's a strange situation to be sure, but the best way to describe it is this. Imagine actually talking to a girl and a thought comes up that says "Why would she be interested in you?" You catch this thought, and know it's a bad thought, but you can help but agree. Why would she be interested in you? Then you try to turn it positive by thinking of positive things to say about yourself, and all you can come up with is a steaming turd, and from there you spiral deeper into the pile of shit.
You think, ok, clearly she's interested anyway, right? Who cares? You shove the annoying "Why?"s out of the way and hit this brick wall that says "You'll just ruin it anyway." Both paths away from this wall are littered with reasons why you're a shitty person, but you're trying to be positive, so you climb over the wall. On top there's hope, there's the future and the two of you are together, however you've never been in a relationship before and the thought of someone being near you and talking to you all the time sounds like nails on a chalkboard in your mind.
I could go on and on about what goes through my fucked up head (being INFP is suffering). The bottom line is that for every positive thought, for every light that appears, two more thoughts counter that logic, and two more lights go out. I can barely fight my depression enough to function on a day to day basis, and I often lose that fight. Adding more people to the mix just makes things worse, so I'm better left alone.
>>28645036
why does she have a sunny side up egg in her hair
>>28645673
Pretty much.
We only accept easy relationships, where there's no criticism or disagreement.I pushed away my best friend out of fear of his talent and jealousy of his life.
He was kind of a dick but he did actually care about me in a way my other "friends" don't.
>>28647634
If he cared then where is he now?
>>28649056
I put him through too much bullshit. There's a point where you just say enough's enough.
It's entirely my fault
>can't help myself due to my self-defeating personality
>nobody else cares enough to try after some basic advice that I disregard
>end up hurting them subconsciously and they fuck off
>fall deeper into the "hole"
Just fuck my shit up.
>>28645908
>>28646311
You described it very well, thank you.
>>28645891
>3d
>waifu
hehehe
