What's /r9k/'s opinion on unmarried men adopting kids?
Now before you jump to any conclusions, it's not with any intention to fuck my kids. I know that's a common idea around here, but that's not what I want. At all. I grew up without parents for most of my youth and know how badly someone might yearn for a loving family, and I also believe we shouldn't be recklessly adding to the global population while there are already children out there who need to be raised. I've always been told by both women and older folks/people with kids that I'd be an incredible father, and I believe I have a lot of real, life-related wisdom to pass on. In addition, I'm starting my own business soon and should be looking at a six figure income, so I'll easily be able to care for kids financially and give them the best life possible.
So yeah. I guess I just wanted to start a discussion about this; see what you all think, see what people think about men like me, and maybe hear about your personal plans/experience on the subject.
I would like to but it's close to impossible for a single man to do so.
>>28641777
It's going to be hard for you, what with the stigma on single men. Still, fuck, kids deserve homes.
>>28641777
Certainly better than single motherhood, but nigh impossible to do in a civilized country.
>>28642009
this. they'll see it as a red flag
make sure youre making at least 100k/yr and have purchased a house in a good neighborhood to stand a chance as a single male
>>28641857
>>28642009
>>28642077
>>28642140
It is pretty ridiculous. Would having a woman in my life help, or do I have to be married to said woman? I'm in a place in my life where I'm not seriously dating, and I'll certainly never get married. Should I give up and just open a tiny non-profit school/mentor program? Would I need a teaching/psych degree for that? That's always been another dream of mine. It's not the same as actively caring for a child, but it's close.
>>28641777
I get you OP
I want kids and I can see myself as a father, my family says I'd be a great dad since I've taken care of my little cousins.
The problem is that I can't see myself as a boyfriend/husband. I was also thinking that fathers always get the short end of the stick when it comes to their kids.
>if you have kids with a woman and she breaks up with you she is the most likely to get custody
>can't adopt if you are single
>women can have kids whenever they want and can even do it without sex
The other thing stopping me is the situation in my country, this is currently not a place to raise kids and I'm afraid that maybe I won't be able to leave and start my own family.
I would focus on that new business of yours and make sure it works properly so you can be sure you can provide for the kids. Good luck
>>28642402
http://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2013/nov/02/men-single-dad-father-surrogacy-adoption
http://www.npr.org/2012/06/19/154860588/single-dads-by-choice-more-men-going-it-alone
If your all your relatives die off but leave a child behind you probably will end up as his/her guardian
>>28642659
That's not really comforting senpai
>>28642402
Having a female friend at least who can provide a good reference would probably help. A judge in New York recently allowed platonic male and female friends to adopt together.
>>28642443
Where are you from and what's going on there?
>>28642530
>every article is interviewing gay men
Fugg, will people assume I'm gay if I adopt?
>>28642835
That actually sounds kinda cool. I'd like to live in a huge house with lots of roommates, like a miniature village, and having a mom there that I don't have to be legally bound to would be great. I wonder if I'd be liable for child support if things go sour, though. That's one of the main things I'm trying to avoid with this in the first place. What about three-parent adoptions? Say a lesbian couple and myself. Or if that doesn't work, I guess just one lesbian and myself. I couldn't stomach the idea of another man trying to compete with me for my child's love/trust.
>>28641777
It's more of an uphill battle but is definitely possible.
>>28641777
Why not have at least one surragate child. I'd think you would treat a child less like a friend and more like a son if you knew it was yours.
>>28643036
I'm from Venezuela.
We're going through the worst economic crisis in our history and it doesn't seem to get any better as the days go by. Imagine you earn 30 bucks a month and you can only buy food and diapers from resellers at double the price and not being able to buy clothes because everything is too damn expensive.
My brother moved to paris and I might have to go there even though I'd rather stay.
I was also laughing at the fact that those men in the articles are gay. Maybe we're the weird ones for not wanting to fuck girls.
>>28643191
Would you happen to know how single male surrogacy differs from single male adoption? Are the laws more lenient?
>>28643411
Damn, I hadn't even heard about that. That sounds like some Africa nonsense, man. I hope things go well for you. But why France in particular? Just because your brother is there?
>Maybe we're the weird ones for not wanting to fuck girls.
But I do fuck girls, anon. I swear.
>>28641857
To adopt, but you can have them made for you.
http://www.parenting.com/fertility/planning/more-single-guys-are-turning-to-surrogacy-to-become-dads
>>28643563
>just because your brother is there?
Pretty much
I'd have a place to land and get my shit together. I would rather live in a place that speaks english but france is a great place to start.
The only thing stopping me is the language and the cost of travel/documents.
>>28643610
I-I may have a chance to spread my genes yet....
>>28641777
You should volunteer with Big Brothers or a similar charity that mentors disadvantaged youth.
>>28645167
Sex is not so important, you sexless loser.
OP I think your intentions are good but seriously how are you gonna give that kid the attention it deserves when you're running a business? Sure you can care for them financially better than say an orphanage can but (depending on the age ofc) you'd need some help from either child care or after school care as well.
Don't underestimate the time commitment needed for kids man. If you're running a business they'll seriously eat into any of your time outside of work hours. Which you may say "yeah so what" to now but seriously people need time to themselves as well.
>>28641777
Fuck, original canon Dante is so much better than DmCs
>>28645438
Pretty much anypne can give a child more attention than an orphanage. Those are pretty rare these days anyway, but why would you think they would get more attention in a place with one care taker for ten kids?
Anyone can be a parent. It isn't the slavish work our bitter parents made it out to be. They were just bitter than they couldn't go out to get smashed every weekend (or, at least mine were).
