>you aren't funny anon
>stop posting the same thread over and over, autist
feelsbadman
if the gets told to you, its probably cause its true. even if a normie says so. get better.
>>28618270
>please stop talking to me
>>28618270
god that hurts
>>28618270
>My friend thinks your cute, Anon
>You'll never mean as much to me as he does
t.normie problems
>>28618270
this always hurt me a lot
Ur too good a friend to date
>I'll never lick your asshole, Anon. Not until you lick mine
>>28618327
The friend is always ugly.
>you unlock gf @2x bw bench, not 1.7x
>you're like a brother to me
Original
>Tell someone I was thinking about suicide
>"Go ahead"
>It was my mom
>you're not cool
didn't ask bitch
>The beta uprising will never happen, Anon. Just accept it.
>>28618470
She called your bluff, pussy. Should have done it to show her who's boss.
>>28618270
>fuck off, Quit following us faggot.
>Pareciera que todo lo que mira lo vuelve mierda
Dieeeeeeeeee
>>28618561
I would have done it had there been a gun in the house, or any other method of quick, impulsive suicide.
>>28618409
It actually hurt a lot more when both the friend and the girl are attractivebecause obviously it's a fucking joke.
>>28618561
>Should have done it to show her who's boss.
>"I'll shoot myself in the mouth, that'll show that cunt
>>28618270
>Plan to ask out this girl in my class
>My parents have always told me how handsome I am
>"I'll have to fight them off at the door," my father would tell me
>I'm as confident as someone who's been bullied all his life could be
>The only thing I'm worried about if whether I should kiss her after she says yes
>The bell goes, and it's time for everyone to go home
>I'm walking behind her on the staircase
>No one's around, so I take the opportunity
>I tap her on the shoulder
>"Will you go out with me?" I ask
>She turns around and looks at me in disgust
>"EWWWWWWWWWWWW" she screams, and runs away
>The next day in class, everyone's making fun of me for asking her outI then become her betacuck best friend and ask her out 2 more times over the next 2 years. I even brought and paid for a pregnancy test for her when she got fucked by a guy called Brad at 14yo
>>28618470
>tfw the same thing happened to me
I was so shocked at her indifference, it taught me to never tell anyone my feelings though
i know this isn't a phrase, but one time a 10/10 )(IMHO) girl hugged me!!!for a dare of course
>>28618565No exactamente de la misma manera que lo dijiste anon, pero muy similar
> Uuuumm I wasn't taking to you.
>>28618270
how do I live with not being able to talk to people and even when I do I cant carry a conversation or make people laugh? people think its because im kinda shy and maybe theirs more to me .but I actually have no redeeming qualities , that's literally all there fucking is
>>28618970
I hope that story is fiction...
>>28619199
I think anyone can be funny if they can just let loose. Speaking from experience when I was in like middle school I used to be pretty outgoing and sometimes loud if something bugged me or got my attention, and wasn't afraid to say what was on my mind. Sometimes I said something stupid yeah but I never tried to censor myself. People thought I was funny and I had a few close friends to hang out with. There just might be a few moments where you may want to question what you're about to say or do because of the impact it can have on relationships, but people generally like when you are genuine around them and often find it funny. Humor can be peculiar like that where like "true" humor is basically spontaneous, you don't plan it before hand, it arises from the situation. Just be aware because that attitude can also get you into trouble, like make sure you can be comfortable with the people you're around.
>>28619429
I wish it was made up aswell
My father paid a prostitute to have sex with me as a graduation present, I didn't want to, he said it might be my only chance at getting laid before I died
She was really rough, just told me to take my clothes off, I asked no dancing, cuddling, she told me to get a girlfriend for that shit and laughed
I got naked and she just stood, there and said "the shit I have to do for a buck"
As soon as I saw her tits I got rock hard, she just looked and started laughing:
"That's all you got, Jesus, that's pathetic"
I lost my erection, ran to the bathroom and cried, I was so mad I wanted to rape and hurt her, make her cry, make her sorry
She waited, I refused to come out, she left, my Dad was pissed, called me a faggot and a pussy
>>28620692
karma desu
>>28618270
>anon, Stacy doesn't even like you. She's just using you to buy her alcohol.
no... no...
>>28619199
This hurts so much, I can hardly keep up a conversation and some people will just plain cut me off and change the subject.
>Try chatting up a girl
>she gives lame unenthusiastic response
>She looks genuinely uninterested and looks around the room
>She gets up and leaves
Sometimes it's not even words.
I'm dissapointed
>>28618270
>we only liked you because you bought us shit
Fuck me senpai. Shit just happened, too.
I forget the wording, but it was something along the lines of, "is what they say about black guys true?"I thought it was, for me.She didn't think so.She tried to console me afterwards, assuring me that it's fine I'm average.
>>28618794
..fuck
It just hit me
It's been like 8 years since 6th grade and it just hit me.
>Stacy thinks you're cool! :)
Fuckijf bitch.
>>28620950
>ewww no i dont shut up!
ha ha.
>>28620925
Holy shit this post
>JUST
Lately I got
>It's nice to have dinner with you Anon since there are no romantic quid pro quo
But the most hurtful was simply getting my hand gently pushed down
>>28621067
i hope you know shes most likely saying it on purpose to make fun of you.
i also hope you stop letting her treat you like an used sock.
>>28620925
AVERAGE
BLACK
PECKERS
>>28620923
damn, son that sounds awful. What happened?
>>28620692
wew your dad must be the biggest dickhead on this planet
Just snapchatted these 2 girls i use to talk to apologize for the arguing and shit i used to do and was gonna ask if we can just be friends both read it and both didnt respond, ones with her boyfriend in the bed sleeping and the other one i truely loved and she said she loved me but just read it i was trying to apoligize to the one with the boyfriend because we work together and didnt want it to be akward when we see each other but she ignored it and the other girl is a girl whos single who i day dream about daily i should fucking end it now
i'm assuming this isn't a common one but
>your laugh is so awkward...
>>28618270
>on a crowded bus
>accidentally make a contact with a, relatively good looking, female
>look away afterwards like a robot
>see with the corner of my eye her turning to her friend
>*laughs*
THIS IS IT, WOMEN HAVE GONE TOO FAR
GENDERWAR NOW
>>28618794
>>28620950
>>28618327
>>28620994
>Some cunt tried to do this to me in highschool
>Told them to fuck themselves
>They start getting all screechy and pissy
Felt so fucking good
>>28621834
>a contact
EYE CONTACTI wish I wasn't so autistic to constantly make mistakes when typing
>>28618270
>what are you doing here?you werent even invited
"You arent not a man."
This didn't happen to me but
>sitting in back seat of car with with friend and Stacey
>friend likes her and buys her weed all the time
>it's cramped so he decides to make his move
>put's his hand on her leg
>"Oh my god anon never touch me again"
His soul was crushed that night. He wouldn't talk to anyone.
>your breath stinks
could there possibly be anything more humiliating than this? I swear if I had a gun at that moment I wouldve shot myself without hesitation
Not quite a phrase but
>Start talking to a cool gay guy, basically the only gay guy I knew existed in high school
>I'm really lonely and just want a bf to be happy with
>We start talking
>Literally all he wants is sex
>He proposes we go fuck in a public park bathroom
Fuck you Neil.
>>28621868
I don't want to sound too normie but just brush your teeth m8
>You seemed nice at first, buy you're just as ugly on the inside as you are on the outside. Never talk to me again
That was the last time I ever talked to a woman. That was 6 years ago.
>>28621868
>your breath smells terrible
>tfw
but my dental hygiene was pretty good
I brushed and still brush my teeth in the morning and night everyday
>>28620692
This is made up.
>>28620776
iktfb there will be somebody that likes us for who we are eventually you just have to find them
>>28621989
Do you still have your tonsils? Maybe you have tonsil stones. Should ask your dentist in any case.
>>28621904
I do brush every day, you faggot. I couldnt help that I had gastroduodenitis at the time
You are a good guy anon. You'll make some lucky girl very happy some day.
>>28620692
>I lost my erection, ran to the bathroom and cried
>>28622069
USE FUCKING MINTS YOU FUCKING FAGGOT
HOLY SHIT HOW HARD IS IT TO SOLVE SUCH AN EASY PROBLEM THAT HOLDS YOU BACK
BE FUCKING GLAD YOU'RE NOT LIKE ME AND HALF YOUR FACE WAS RUINED IN A CAR CRASH
YOU CAN'T HIDE THAT SHIT NIGGER
>>28618270
>I don't like you because your fat
6th grade. Fuck you, Julia
>>28618455
A literal autistic girl (19, acts like a 12 year old) that I work with says this to me all the time. I think she wants the D. Send help.
>>28621809
EVERY DAY AAAAAHHHHHH
>>28622159
No, she's probably just extremely attached to you. If she wanted the D you would already know for sure, because autists aren't known to be masters of guile
>>28618270
>I'd kill you for my own survival
8th grade. Was my best friend at the time. Why the fuck would you say something like that, Camron?
>7th grade
>Girl that sits next to me talks to me out of nowhere
>Talk to her for a bit
>Next day
>Sit down and try to talk to her
>Gives me a disgusted face
>"Don't talk to me"
Thats some formative shit man. I can probably trace my intense insecurity and fear of women to that one event
>>28620923
/r/ing story on this pore SOB
>>28619199
This is the worst part about being a robot. Being sexless and girlfriendless really don't hurt nearly as much as this. As being unable to fucking function like a normal human being should function.
>>28621970
>never talk to me or my wifes son ever again
what did she mean by this?
>>28622087
would you mind showing us any pics?
>>28619112
The same thing happened to me, but that's only because she cheated off of my assignment, gave the answers to a dozen other kids, and we all failed. I guess she felt guilty or something, I told her to fuck off, and then she started a rumor about me being gay.
>>28618270
>Be me
>4th grade
>Became close to my oneitis
>I start talking about awful supply teacher
>Call her a fat cow
>"Hey anon. Know who else is a fat cow? YOU!"
>Oneitis starts laughing and walks away
>mfw
How the fuck could you be so heartless?
>>28621861
Why are you upset at being called a man?
>>28618270
"Happy St. Totteringham's Day!"
Nothing ever gets better, fuck everything
>>28622312
>call someone something hurtful
>get called the same thing
>How the fuck could you be so heartless?
>>28622312
>how could you be so heartless?
hey kanye
>grade 8
>doing a rehearsal for the graduation ceremony
>name gets called
>walk to the front of the room
>teacher tells me to slow down
>chad asks "why can't you ever be manly, anon?"
>Be 16
>Playing magic in classroom with girl I have a supermassive crush on
>Play pic related
>Girl comments on how it looks like a funny little fat guy
>Friend who is watching says "Hey anon it kind of looks like you."
>Girl giggles
That is when I realized I was a joke to her.
>>28618384
funniest thing ive read all day
>>28622401
>>how could you be so heartless?
>hey kanye
TOPKEK I thought the same thing when I read that
>>28618270
>Anon, why don't talk?
>Anon, why don't you ever smile?
>>28622312
You deserved that.
>>28622429
And you were sharing that hobby with her too. Oh man, that's harsh.
>>28622429
You can't possibly be this inept
That was a joke. It is a normal human reaction to laugh at jokes. If anything, she started to think you were a joke after something that fucking petty and obviously playful offended you enough for you to remember it as a "heart-shattering phrase" years later.
>>28618270
>talking to my tulpa waifu (read: myself)
>cute nothings
>full of love
>say some cute/mean shit like "haha in your dreams anon ur too fat"
>call her a bitch
>wake up to myself
>slowly regress back into my delusion
>make another one
>repeat
give love a chance
not even my imagination thinks i'm worth it
>>28618270
>youre so cold anon
>its like youre fire proof nothing shakes you
meanwhile im literally crying on the inside, thats basically the moment i realized that I had never been close to anyone and that no one understood my feelings
>>28622506
I was a bit fat and had a fucking scarring history with bullying. I still cant tell if people are joking or not to this day. I have absolutely no sense of social nuances so shit that is meant to be harmless cuts like a fucking knife and things that are supposed to be hints fly over my head. It has to be some kind of mental deficiency, it's like being socially colorblind.
>>28622565
Have you considered therapy of some sort?
>>28622506
>That was a joke
...that was clearly at his expense. The mean-spiritedness of that comment is undeniable, there's no way to make that """joke""" in a friendly way. It hurt because it was intended to.
The thing that hurts is when they don't reply or make an excuse
>You look like a school shooter!
Why even bother trying
>>28618270
>Why can't you just be happy for me?
>>28622636
No you sperg. Friends make jokes at each others' expense all the time, that's about half the basis for banter. Everyone understands you don't really mean to insult anyone seriously, and assume you also know this
![4948746+_d709c506c5bcb2ed429b540682c7b882[1].gif](https://i.imgur.com/ZwCF5PD.gif "4948746+_d709c506c5bcb2ed429b540682c7b882[1].gif")
>>28622561
>literally crying on the inside
>>>>>>>>>>literally
>>28622357
>>28622401
>>28622482
She said it first. I agreed.
>>28622159
>she wants the d
no, that's just your sexual imagination.
treat her like a little sister, anon, she believes in you and trusts you.
>>28622660
just tell them they will be the first ones on the day of your retribution. I bet this will scare them shitless
>>28622727
She probably actually liked the teacher and thought you were being an asshole, so she set that up for the sick burn that you apparently haven't recovered from in over a decade
>>28622655
this is the most soul crushing thing ever
>Why do you sit here, nobody wants you here
Freshman year lunch time trying desperately to find a table to join. End up just going to the library during lunch for the rest of high school.
>>28618270
>Anon you smoked all the weed you asshole, this is why nobody likes you.
Fuck if I care, I'm high nigga
>>28622765
She didn't like her. Besides, it was only a supply
>>28622760
This was years ago.
I suppose what made it worse was that I already though of myself as that type of kid. But that's not who I wanted to be. I just wanted people to think of me.
>>28622914
Then it's even more straightforward, assuming you actually interpreted the events right. She hated you more than she did the teacher and thought it was obnoxious how you ran your mouth about her long after she stopped caring, or it was a mean joke.
>I really hope you find someone one day anon, you're a good person and you deserve it
>whoever it is will be lucky to be with you.
>>28623038
I never really understood why this one hurts so much, but it does
>>28623311
hurts more if it's said by the person you like
which it was.
>haha anon why do your gums show when you smile it's sooo gross
i haven't smiled since
>You have dead eyes
I don't know why the fuck someone thought this wouldn't hurt
>True love doesn't exist, just fuck a girl and get it over with.
Normies will never understand.
>I don't have time to date you, I want to focus on my career.
>>28623759
Laaauurraa, I drank the mountain dew!
bp af
>>28618270
>your hands are so cold
no one likes to hold cold hands
From a girl I went to grade school with
>My dad still tells stories about you
>>28623749
they knew and they wanted to hurt your live, poet's soul
beauty is coveted and despised
>"who is that scary looking guy?"
A girl said this.
>>28623548
some normie said this about me to his normie friend while I was present and heard everything
>"his teeth are so big, I just want to punch him in the mouth and knock them all out"
>my soul when
I don't smile often now
>>28621989
heres some TIPS from an autist on /fit/ to be desu honest
>we just tolerate you
>i have to study, maybe later
