Have you guys ever tried doing the things that make you anxious? It will be awkward and terrible the first few times, but eventually you just get used to it and it stops bothering you.
>be me
>23 yo kissless, hand-holdless virgin
>finally decide to say fuck it.
>see qt sitting on a bench
>ask if I can sit down
>try starting a conversation about an online contest I had entered
>conversation is awkward
>stutttering
>legs shaking
>she seems to be getting annoyed
>finally just ask her to a hockey game
>she says I have plans
>walk away, in a ball of sweat before realizing I never even introduced myself, or asked for her name
>3 months later, I can just get a date any time with one line
>Hello, my name is anon. I was just wondering, are you seeing anyone right now?
Basically, I just wanted to share this because I realized that if you're a shut in, literally the best thing you can do for yourself is find out what things freak you out, and just go do them. It becomes fun after a while.
But anon maybe if I wait a couple more weeks it'll go away on its own.
Yes, that's literally exposure therapy. It's the basis for how Cognitive Behaviour Therapy works.
That works for some guys. Sometimes you need to get rejected hard just to realize it sucks but you're still alive and breathing afterwards. Then you just keep trying.
>>28500591
Ok, I did it a few times. When I started it, I pretty much went in with the attitude that it would be terrible and awkward, but I just wouldnt care. I would just keep trying to get better at starting conversations, approaching people etc. until I was comfortable with it.
It's important that you don't become bitter about it though. Even when people dont respond well, it is just an opportunity to learn what you did wrong.
>>28500620
pretty much, but I went into this fully expecting to get rejected on the first try, then the feeling of rejection wasnt so terrible.
The second time I tried something like this, the girl said, "no, but thank you for the offer" which was much better than the total feeling of repulsion I got from the first girl.
>>28500575
This desu. My ideal girl would approach me first anyway to show she has an outgoing personality
i think this would always be wasted effort because i look 14
>>28501125
thats ok just dont act 14
>>28501303
my fear is i'll be laughed at
>>28501323
Who cares if she laughs at you? If you have the balls to approach her, and you ask her out in a respectful manner, and she laughs at you, call her out for being a disrespectful, immature stupid cunt.
>>28500660
>to learn what you did wrong.
If you are truly socially retarded and have no one for feedback, how is that supposed to work?
>>28501461
If she says no, you probably fucked up somehow. You came in too strong, your body language was weird., you seemed needy/sad/angry...
Then you try something different next time. It helps if you have some sort of role model in mind.
>>28501437
>Who cares if she laughs at you?
I do.
>[If] she laughs at you, call her out for being a disrespectful, immature stupid cunt.
What good will that be? I'll still be humiliated.
>>28501700
It's either that, or die a virgin. You have the power to better your situation.
>>28501649
Yes, but what I mean is its easy to know you did something wrong. But if you can't identify the elements or group them properly it's going to feel like plinko.
>>28501729
i suppose virginity. with any luck, vr porn will similar or better than the real thing.
>>28501700
You're fucking retarded if you see that as a problem. Her opinion of you literally doesn't matter at all. If someone laughs at you for simply being nice and approaching them, you should call them out for being a piece of shit and then move on. You can literally get laughed at by one person, then 5 minutes later you might meet a different person who you can get along with.
Besides, its unlikely they will laugh at you..
>>28500497
Yes, I tried it 100 times. See attachment. Please advise.
https://youtu.be/zmIeo2bZVoQ
>>28501960
Do different things, different tones of voice, play with where you put the emphasis on your syllables, your word choice, how close you stand, whether you should shake their hand first...
The guy in the video would have done better if he had started off with saying his name and shaking the security guards hand and then explaining why he needed the $100.
