My apathy
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You are currently reading a thread in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001
You are currently reading a thread in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001
Everyone tells me the way I see this world is just the way I think and I can change it. I try that. Everything is still dull and meaningless and the only excitement I get from life is gaming... What is this feeling of total apathy in life? I can't help but look at everything in life objectively, no matter how "morally wrong", I feel such a large disconnect between me and my surroundings.
Sorry for ranting brobots, I don't have anyone to talk to and I don't really know how else to vent.
Let's chat and keep this thread friendly, if anyone wants to explain my mental state to me then please do.
>>28470657
Sounds like depression. You should talk to a doctor and maybe get a prescription. If you wait too long like I did then the only thing you still enjoy (gaming) will also become dull just like everything else.
>>28470870
Same this happened to me. It's pretty hollow. Sorry OP, no advice.
>>28470870
>>28470979
I'm sorry to hear that, I hope things turn around for you guys. How do you guys cope, if you are willing to share?
It comes from a lack of purpose or direction in life. Sometimes it's just depression.
>>28471138
>How do you guys cope, if you are willing to share?
I try not to think. I just go about my day like a zombie. When I come home I just turn on a stream or something else equally mindless which doesn't need any concentration and watch that until I fall asleep
>>28471172
How do I find purpose if I'm not good at anything? How do I give myself direction if nothing here interests me. I had dreams but they are all so futile to chase, so why bother?
>>28471289
You just start doing things like going to the gym, jogging or running. It's really hard to start so medication can give you a jumpstart sort of, that's why you should talk to a doctor.
Sounds like depression and dissociation.
This is going to sound bad, but stop asking why. It only leads to circular thinking that will only frustrate you. Yeah, everything is meaningless. But that doesn't mean you find and do shit that makes you happy. The hard part is finding what those things are.
>>28471366
*doesnt mean you can't
>>28470657
I feel the same anon.
The only things i enjoy are games and watching the news. Everything i do every day is based on logic and not on emotion. People dont really understand me so i feel the same disconnect with my surrounding.
I've got some friend i enjoy being with but i always feel I'm not like them. In my entire life i've only met one person who was just like me but sadly i lost contact.
The last half year was the worst year of my life because of that i'm now struggeling with anxieties and panic attacks. After months of struggeling i finally told my parents i felt miserable and wanted to talk to someone. last week was my first meeting with a psych, only talking about my problems was already a relief but didnt fix it obvious, but it is something i guess.
Maybe a psych is something you can try too? I hope you will feel happy again soon
>>28470657
>the only excitement I get from life is gaming
worry not, you're not at the worst part yet
it sounds like you're having dissociative spells, you can find information on them easily but you're obviously far better off talking to someone with professional knowledge
>>28471366
I am willing to bet that OP does have depression and experiences dissociation due to, probably, extended hours of contact with fantasy worlds.
He needs to get on medication to help himself get started on a new perspective towards life, I do wish these threads didn't have to exist and people were aware enough that they'd automatically know... Or at the very least have someone in their lives, who would let them know that they have been demonstrating symptoms of depression.
Everytime I hear someone trying to guilt trip someone who clearly has been suffering from depression with "YOU'RE JUST LAZY" I die a little inside.And literally wish they would die.
>>28470657
READ THIS COMMENT OP YOU APATHETIC SHIT
Ok, a man must have a certain sense of accomplishment in life, the feeling of creating or doing something worthwhile. It causes a release of dopamine and some other chemical I can't recall atm. VIDEO GAMES ARE ENGINEERED TO CAUSE A RELEASE OF THOSE CHEMICALS. You are literally getting your fill of what you are hardwired to need out of life from games. Stop playing and take up a constructive hobby and I guran-fuckin-tee it will suddenly be enjoyable. I say this as someone who used to accomplish genuinely impressive things and now just wastes away on Destiny and minecraft day in and day out.
>>28470870
Don't listen to this faggot, drugs will eventually make you retarded and slow as a fucking snail
>>28471771
This. It will also fuck up your memory really bad.
>>28471771
That's why I haven't talked to a doctor. Out of fear they'd hand me some drugs that would fuck my life up.
>>28472004
talk to a counselor or a not-md-level psych or something, most of the people that do psychiatric counseling are not qualified to directly prescribe medication
you can just say no if they do ask you to go on it anyway
Their advice is shit because it supposes everything is arbitrary and happiness is only found in "faking it until you make it" which is just another way of saying, "the genuine human experience is awful, pretend it's something else". Don't listen to those people
>>28472075
>mfw my mom is forcing me to take aripipazole
>i can't help but look at everything in life objectivly
Wrong many socials things aren't objective. For example what is good or bad? There is no objective answer it depends on the person and the situation.
I don't think you mean you look at things objectivly i think you mean you look at things "impersonal and without much emotion".Which isn't necessarily wrong because there isn't realy a right or wrong way to look at things.
The real question is were you always like that? If yes that move on in your life you look at things a bit diffrtent then most but hey you're not allone with that. Just make sure to have your "act together" because society wants to see at least faked empathy.
If you "got" like that then i think something happens which caused you to change(many failures in life, losing all of your friends etc etc). So you're not the "real" you but that again what is the real you.
In the end humans change our environment and our thoughts form us. You probably won't be the same person in 10 years. So it's probably a wate trying to understand why you got like that and how you can regain your "old" self.
Just be honest with yourself and ask yourself who do you want to be? What is possible for you? And try to achieve that. That's what everyone does. I mean do you really care? Many things are dull and meaningless and they only become meaning when you give it to them. So do what you care for in the end.
I know I probably have depression but I can't get help! I don't want to change the way I think, it's who I am. Feeling like this makes me feel special. This outlook is one of my best features.
I used to be like you but now even gaming is meaningless and boring. So I just sleep and shitpost. No advice from me too OP since I'm in your same boat.
>>28471751
Pls rrsond
