Anybody here have so much embarrassment and shame they literally cannot function? You guys cannot begin to comprehend how much of a faggot ive been in my life. I cant be strong and get over it either. Nobody understands
Whenever I start to feel good and get on a roll of turning my life around, I always remember the most cringeworthy shit imaginable and contemplate suicide/moving away from everyone I know for hours
>>28381679
>tfw most of it is still online
>tfw can never get close internet friends because of it
>>28382463
Iktf i always push my friends away by "being my self" JUST
>>28381679
I can relate OP.
I was a total tool throughout my entire life always doing what I thought was cool and not what I really wanted to do.
Now I'm a 30 year old loser who lives at home and has failed out of college 4 times. No one is more of a loser than me.
I have no one to blame but myself but I'm sure having a beta father who never talked to me didn't help.
>>28381679
>>28381792
What kind of cringe worthy shit have you guys done? I'm genuinely curious.
I'm this guy>>28383225
So I want to feel better about myself.
>>28383245
I got drunk my dude, so i cant think so good no more, but ill tell you what i can. One time i got kicked out of my cousins wedding for telling a little girl to stfu and at rehab i ate a bunch of molded mushrooms because my ex gf (who apparently thought i was a faggot as well) told me they would work. Just random shit like that that keeps flooding in my mind to make me NEED to kill self, hope you feel better
You have NO IDEA how UNIMPORTANT those things are.
Your WORST NIGHTMARE MOMENTS are LESS IMPORTANT than grains of sand being pushed by waves. The world does not care about them. It does not remember them.
You are not awkward, you are an egoist who wants to be the star of his own tragicomedy, and trembles at the thought of doing anything else.
You need to STOP being yourself and adapt.
>>28383245
I meant molded oranges wow
>>28383306
Yeah I've done stupid dumbass shit like that too. I can't help but act extremely awkward and weird around children. My parents are embarrassed to bring me around other family members with new kids, can't really blame them though.
I want to kill myself so badly but keep chickening out.
>>28383315
Lmao i wish it was me just wanting to be a star of my own comedy but seriously you have no idea the REAL shame and embarassment comes from this shit like being a NEET and ugly af at 24 years old
>>28383315
This made me want to kill myself even more.
>>28383349
Yeah dude, i feel you. My neices and nephews hate me. I fucking hate all children though so whatever idk if you feel the same. My parents are getting to the point of being ashamed of taking me places too. I REALLY want to die but onlyby benzo or opiate OD, i tried once on 200 mg of benzos but lived unfortunately, you can bet ill be dead here soon though. Honestly though dude YOU dont deserve to die like i do, and i hope you make it senpai
>>28383358
>you have no idea the REAL shame and embarassment comes from this shit like being a NEET and ugly af at 24 years old
Just keep pretending that this is somehow a unique predicament, at least it'll keep you occupied.
>>28383390
Maybe you need to stop treating everything as an excuse to feel suicidal.
>>28383315
>You need to STOP being yourself and adapt
Not op
This is good advice. Really difficult to put into practice though. I've tried this a few times but I always feel like a sack of shit which makes the facade crumble.
>>28383440
At least you have good pepes my dude
>>28383501
>Really difficult to put into practice though
It's a process, not a temporary stunt like you're treating it.
>>28383507Running low however
>>28383569
So when you run out of pepes do you stfu?
>>28383637Of course not, Pepes are just a means to an end.
>>28383669
That wasnt even a pepe my du
>>28381679
>wake up in the morning
>literally spend quarter of my day cringing
>>28381679
>tfw every interaction you have with people IRL just reinforces your self-hatred
>tfw you can't look at yourself in the mirror for too long because you become too self-aware and start to feel as though you are being judged by an outside observer and yet you simultaneously are this very observer
