>>28376423
fully 20 years ago. I was 12 and i started asking my parents and teachers when I could stop doing so much homework and start having rewards for being smart/working hard. After they told me "later" ambiguously often enough, it hit me one day that the rewards were never coming and that they were all just working forever, promising themselves that the good shit was coming.

ever since that day, I could never feel any strive to do anything. whenever I look at people who think they're kicking ass in life because of how hard they work, I just feel so sorry for them and disconnect and go back to my cave.

The last year couple of years of high school

>>28376423
when i realised no matter how hard i tried i would never be able to be happy.

>>28376423
not yet. maybe if i ever get terminal cancer

when i realized I was ugly and i would never be able to afford plastic surgery to fix it.

>>28376423
Still have some slight irrational hope,maybe I'm actually God doing a trial run in this world I've created with it's people.

Maybe there is a reward at the end.

I'd like to think so.

I never had any to begin with desu