>you rub a lamp and find a genie; what do you wish for?
>remember: three wishes only, no wishing for more wishes, no wishing for more genies, no interference with free will (i.e., wishing that your oneitis falls in love with you)
>omnipotence
>omniscience, channeled through an indestructible object; I would have to ask it questions and obtain knowledge that way instead of being burdened by always knowing everything at once
>as a token of good faith, I wish for the genie to be released from his lamp, with powers that can never supercede or remove my own
>>28273679
damn this guy really thought his shit out
does omnipotence include the ability to time travel?
>>28273607
i wish that the mods didnt delete that thread where we were doxxing black cuck king.. and money and another cat i guess
>>28273942
Of course it would
>>28273607
>i can post on 4chan without captcha or a post time limit and can never be banned
>i can turn invisible at will like a ghost (go through objects and shit)
> i will live for as long as I want until I think in my mind I want to kill myself seriously
>>28273607
1. Fix my broken second degree burned dick
2. restore my original foreskin back
3. 500 million us dollars.
4. if all 3 fail for some reason kill me now.
>>28274018
>500 million us dollars.
why not just wish for unlimited wealth and influence?
>>28274166
or that. I don't care anyways not like this shit is going to happen fuck just kill me please.
>>28273607
Dbz like powers
>>28274018
howd your dick get burned? can you fap?
>>28273607
I wish I was in another universe with a lap EXACTLY like this so I can make more wishes..
it's actually an incense burner, I guess they called it a lamp to keep it simple for the kiddies
Wish to be God.
God can do anything
No more need for genies
>>28273607
>stop aging in twenties/age less/immortality
>ability to learn everything possible for someone such as myself, and be able to retain the knowledge
>a pocket dimension that has a library full of every book past present and future
I wish to know the answer of a question to which I'll never have the answer.
>>28273607
my first wish would be to know which two wishes would lead to me having the most fulfilling happy life I could possibly have
then use my last two wishes accordingly
>>28274441
it's a middle eastern oil lamp you dumbass
>the ability to wish for more wishes successfully
>infinite wishes
>Complete and utter Godhood
>>28275913
used ceremonially to burn incense, otherwise it wouldn't be so ornate
>>28276023
you're thinking of hindu puja lamps you ignorant fuck
>>28276023
Bitch do you not get that wealthy people make all their shit to look ornate as fuck. You think this is some commoners lamp? Bitch I hope the sultan sentences you to be beheaded.
>Ability to stop and resume time
>eternal youth/don't age past my prime
>ability to retain infinite information
>the instinctive skills of a man who has trained for 100 years on any task that I attempt
>know the answer to anything as I need it
>stop aging
I wish my great great great aunt would die of natural causes in her sleep and leave me $100,000 in her will.
I wish all my decedents will die peaceful natural deaths of old age without alzheimer's or any other degenerative disease.
Genie bro can go free if he promises to be my wingman once a month until i find a qt gf
>>28273679
>omnipotence
The genie turns you into a genie. Your next wishes are invalid as genies don't grant other genies wishes.
I wish I could shape shift.
I wish I had immortality that I could end at any time.
I wish I could time travel.
That's it.
>>28273607
Free will isn't real.
Also
1. I wish that the Godhand was a real thing
2. I wish for a Crimson Behelit that would acknowledge me as its true owner
3. I wish that the genie would fucking die for not offering me more wishes, even if I didn't need them.
>>28275803
>wishes to know what next two wishes would lead me to be the happiest
>wishes to be the happiest ive ever been
>wishes for the world to fly into the sun
Gotta end on a good note familia
>>28277702
He said Genie not Monkey Paw
>>28273607
- My debt paid
- A girl that loved me.
- A normie look
>>28273679
>you cannot wish for true omnipotence because, if we are going by Aladdin rules, a genies magic cannot, even indirectly, interfere with free will
>you also cannot wish for it because it is impossible, logically paradoxical actions like making a rock so heavy you can't lift it eliminate the possibility of omnipotence
>you could wish for omnipotence minus these exceptions though (which is what i'd do), but in that case you don't need to wish for the other 2, you can just use your omnipotence
>>28277702
>being this retarded
genies aren't omnipotent, if you have to follow any rules such as only using magic to grant wishes, you aren't omnipotent. if you do not follow any rules you cannot be a genie.
>>28273607
Probably some sort of reality warping/reality hopping ability combined with near godlike powers. I'd like to hop around the realms of human creativity and imagination and interact with them.
1. All the money
2. Indestructability
3. Telekinesis
I'd wish for eternal happiness for all beings.
Maybe after wishing for everyone who's ever died to come back to life first, since it'd be unfair for them to miss out on eternal happiness just because they were unlucky enough to die before I found the genie.
>lifelong health for me and everyone I love and a painless death from old age
>any plan I make throughout life succeeds
>after death I and everyone I love get to go to an alternate universe with eternal hapiness where everyone stays the age they want to be (basically our private heaven)
>>28277702
Nah I wished for omnipotence not to be stuck in a lamp and forced to give people whatever if they rub me
>>28278252
I'm okay with not being able to affect free will. I wouldn't be doing that anyway.
>paradoxes make omnipotence impossible
I think omnipotence finds a way around that.
>you could just use your powers for the other two
Sure but I wanted to use the genie's powers for it and, again, give that little bit at the end back to him for granting me infinite power even above his.
>>28278252
>genies aren't omnipotent
So you're asking a genie to grant you power greater than its own? That hardly seems possible.
>>28278398
>you have $500 in a bank account but you live in a country were all purchases, investments etc. have 50% tax on them
>effectively, you then have $250
>you instead transfer to another person in a different country without such a tax
>they effectively have $500
>you gave them more money than you have
>>28278365
>I think omnipotence finds a way around that.
yeah which is exactly why it can't exist
if 2+2 cannot equal 5
in order for you to be omnipotent, you would have to be able to make 2+2=5
therefore you can't be omnipotent
>all wishes in this thread don't come true
>every anon in this thread gets a gf that cheats on him with me
>an invincible goat that can eat anything and loves me
1. Wish for large amount of money
2. Wish for pornstar or whore of my choice to be placed in front of me
After an hour or so:
3. Wish for the world to be destroyed.
I will end this pointless cycle.
>>28278509
I wish this guy's goat eats him
>black hole destroying psychokinesis
>Time manipulation
>wave manipulation
There, I'm effectively God
>>28278446
yeah but
>yfw the first country charges a 50% tax on transferals of money
>>28278591
What is wave manipulation?
>immortality, specifically impossible to die and unaging. Everything else stays the same, I just can't die or age.
>become a Saiyan because I'm a faggot
>third wish is for a bowl of cinnamon toast crunch because fuck I love that cereal and who needs anything past the first two anyway
Immortal, flight, shoot fucking lasers, get even stronger whenever I would normally die, teleportation, essentially a god among men.
And then because I'm unoriginal take over the world.
>>28278676
don't you see the sick cloak and beach physique his picture has
he wants to be a god at surfing
>>28278676
Heat and radiation.
You can contain an explosion with the psychokinesis, but the heat and radiation will still escape out.
You need to control both particles and waves to be God like.
>>28278509
What's the point of your two last wishes after wishing it all not to come true, not to mention the paradox you just made right there.
>get existence erased from birth and never affect anyone
>go to heavenly afterlife painlessly
>free genie
Invisibility, on will
Invincibility, permanent.
Perfect teleportation, on will.
The rest is quite easy.
>>28275913
How do those even work? Wouldn't the wick burn down into the lamp and then you'd have to wrangle it out before the flame reached the oil and made the lamp explode in your hand?
>>28278130
but wishing to be deliriously happy isn't fulfilling
>Shape shifting to the point of avoiding illness and mortal wounds
>The ability to share this power
>More wealth than the richest man in the world
>>28273607
>The ability to create and enter alternate realities of my own design, in which I will always be transformed into a girl at some point. These realities do not have to be possible or logical.
>Ageless reincarnation: When I die I will be reborn in an alternate reality, but as myself and not a baby. I will not age, but can be transformed into a girl of a different age by the first wish.
>My experience of being a girl shall always be novel and interesting, never becoming boring or repetitive. This includes temporarily erasing my memories of it upon reincarnation.
I call it the perfect being forced into becoming a girl setup.
>>28280661
>I call it the perfect being forced into becoming a girl setup.
it's not forced if you literally wished for it dipshit
>>28280765
I don't think you understand how those wishes work in tandem.
>>28273607
I wish to know what I would consider the best wish if I spent 10 years in perfect health, acting in a way consistent with my ethical values, spending 40 hours per week researching wishing with no other being aware that I was doing so.
>>28278190
>be Eggys gf
>see this
>get butthurt
>realize he was asleep when that was posted
Phew.
