how do you build self-esteem when you don't have any
fake it til you make it big boy
>>28116207
thats what women are for, sleep around a bit and you'll feel better about yourself
>>28116207
Find the causes for your lack of self-esteem and fix them.
Hate something about yourself? Change it.
Developing skills is also a good way of giving yourself self worth
>>28116243
>Hate something about yourself? Change it.
how do you change your personality (or lack thereof)
>>28116207
Lie to yourself until you're motivated enough to do something worthy of praise. It's literally all in your ficking head.
>>28116503
What specifically do you hate about your personality?
>>28116552
>lack of interesting thoughts, experiences, or opinions
>timid around everyone to the point of being a nervous wreck
>when I pretend to be confident I just say cringy shit and instantly regret it
>no ambition, no passions, no direction in life, just a shitty layabout who works a minimum wage job because he was too poor and stupid and indecisive for school
>easily overwhelmed and upset, prone to crying, I pretty much have to force myself not to cry when I get overwhelmed
>basically nothing about my personality would make someone want to go out of their way to be around me, people just tolerate me out of kindness
>>28116243
How do I fix my bone structure?
How do I become taller?
How do I become less hairy?
How do I like hobbies and interests I don't like?
How do I stop believing controversial truths?
How do I undo the past?
How do I get rid of my diagnosed mental illnesses?
How do I stop sweating so much?
How do I gain the will to live?
How do I stop hating people so much I want to kill them?
How do I justify spending years trying to fix myself when I'll still be less desirable than someone else just because of sheer luck?
>>28116626
>How do I stop believing controversial truths?
You don't have to, just stop being a /pol/tard who makes it part of his persona. And stop using the word "degenerate" and "cuck" online.
>>28116207
honestly if you get it share with us OP
my willpower is complete garbage these days
>>28116243
>Hate something about yourself? Change it.
I don't have the money for it.
>>28116615
well it's super cliche, but get a hobby. Hike, join a sport, collect old coins, glassblow, just something that you will enjoy and keep up with. After that you'll not only have something to be proud of (which will help build your self esteem) you'll also have something to talk about with other people. Also you might want to look into therapy or getting some medication that helps with your anxiety
>>28116692
change what you can
accept what you can't
be yourself
>>28116708
>accept what you can't
I am trying to, but other are making fun of me for it.
>>28116726
well fuck them
you don't need acceptance from people like that
I repeat
be yourself
>>28116207
I'm not sure, but it is IMPOSSIBLE to gain self-esteem by following normy advice. An analogy might be trying to teach a cripple to ride a bicycle.
All self-esteem therefore begins with a disdain for normies.
>>28116708
>>28116735
>jst bee urself xD
Yeah, as if that worked up until fucking now.
>>28116819
you are misunderstanding "be yourself"
it is redpill in 2 words
you'll never be capable of satisfying everyone with your personality or looks, so why should you even care? be yourself
don't give a shit
>>28116756
>>28116819
Kek, you guys are pathetic. Your embarrassingly weak willpower will always drag you down into your self pitty party.
>>28116891
>Kek, you guys are pathetic.
>where_do_you_think_we_are.jpg
>>28116207
Think about what would make you feel at ease with yourself, and slowly and steadily work towards that.
all of you are operating under the assumption that Self-Esteem is the quality needed to git gud at life
but what if this particular societal value is inherently flawed, as evidenced by the fact that Western Society is plagued with incredbly high rates of depression as compared to nations with much lower standards of living
perhaps you're familiar with the 'Happiness Index' which presents a country by country analysis of those people-groups who report a better enjoyment of life; most often derived from a sense of purpose and meaning
well Western countries score much lower than developing nations, and i would argue that it's because Western folks are encouraged to be self-involved narciscists who spend all their time and energy on trying to be happy - drawing their answers from within themselves - rather than outward looking family and community-orientated peoples who share their lives with others
lets face it, looking at yourself in the mirror and telling yourself you're great does nothing - but if someone you respect says something encouraging; you remember it and feel esteemed and valued
basically you can't gain a sense of worth by morbidly obsessing about how great you are, you need to be loved and appreciated by others
~i think it's pretty great that you lurk moar, and went so far as to read this
>>28116977
hmmm, nice bullshit
>guarded
>rueful
>short-tempered
>weepy
That's all I got as far as describing myself and I'm not even sure about the last two. I don't think getting confidence is possible.
You need to get it from someone else.
>>28117190
But other people don't want to be around me.
Someone once told me~
How are you suppose to find these good qualities I wonder, if the reason you dont feel good about yourself is that all you can find are qualities you dont like?
I dont think you can.
Not like that, thats not how it works.
I think what it takes is for someone else to say " I like you" thats the only true way you can begin to like yourself...when someone else accepts you, thats when you begin to see yourself through their eyes and you begin to realize that there may actually be Many qualities to like about yourself.
>>28117659
>someone else to say " I like you"
that's all I want
but I'm not good enough
>>28117537
Do you talk to anyone online?
What about your parents?
>>28117710
I don't have any friends online, no, I'm too scared to reach out to people and I quickly run out of things to say which is embarrassing and leads to one of us ending the "friendship"
I talk to my parents sometimes, my father and I have a bad relationship and my mother is nice but I don't trust her when she praises me
>>28117736
Well youre reaching out to us right now arent you. Is it so bad? And there are many other places online much friendlier than this place.
And you should trust youre mother, she knows whats shes talking about
>>28118085
>you should trust youre mother, she knows whats shes talking about
I don't think so, I think she tells me what she thinks I want to hear
she tells me things that contradict with reality
a mother is always going to love her son even if he's a fucking loser
>>28116236
This does not
OP do things that make you feel Vetter about yourself BY yourself. Find confidence in the things you're able to dobecause you can do them. Make sure they are enriching to your well-being though. Help someone do something, give someone the right away at an intersection (on your bicycle) and try to think about how courteous it is to think about others rather than yourself. But do so in the spirit that they are as much worth being given the courtesy as you are. You are your brothers keeper.
>>28116819
beeee yourself, just not like yourself at all
>>28116207
small victories, little steps and all that. It's near impossible to give you a useful solution over the internet. You need to see a consular
Just be yourself, youlI be fine.
I actually think being yourself will eventually work.
One day there will be a person you just get along with, at least more so than others.
It doesnt have to be a peer.
And you dont have to be popular or anything.
