>got invited to a college party tonight im 27
Anyway, I live at home have a shit car etc.... So i was thinking of parking like a block of way, wearing a dress shirt tie business pants. Walking in and saying I just got off work. Parking down the block so they dont see the car. Going to tell them I work in finance and move and shake with stocks
Will this work?
>>28083763
Yes.
That is exactly what all other normal,human 27 yr old men and women will be doing at this party.
Perhaps they'd be interested in a quick powerpoint presentation as well.
What happened to that albino turtle's shell?
>>28083763
>"Wow you're so old...Why are you wearing that? What do you DO for a living?"
>"uhhhh, finance. I move and shake with stocks"
I SERIOUSLY hope you don't do this
>>28083807
im not going to advertise it, but if they ask why i have a shirt and tie on ill say it and go on from there to make it seem like i just came from a busy day i work weekends etc
>>28083833
Im going to say day trade, and diversify, ya know like a mover and shaker in the stock market phrase it like that. I plan to get so drunk and say i cant drive which i hope they will think im responsible and end up back at there dorm or house
>>28083763
don't wear a fucking dress shirt and business pants
nobody is going to be interested in your fictional finance job
just dress comfortably and have a good time
>>28083854
I can't wait for that retarded ass plan to backfire and they roll your drunk ass out the front door and leave you in the gutter.Nah jk my dude, I hope you get laid or something, fag.
>>28083868
but this is my go to, if not I have nothing to fall back on, i dont work now and live at home. So its not like I have another story
>>28083868
/thread
Yeah just relax friend. Life isn't a sitcom, don't set yourself up for this fall.
>>28083930
What if I pull it off though?
>>28084005
>"ohhhhh so are you RICH or someting? Mr. Big shot... hahahah"
>"Where do you live? Can you show us a pic of your car or place I bet it's cool?"
uhhhhh
>Chad: "what's your opinion on the NSDAQ this month? Should I invest in Shekelstein or Goldschlong this year?"
uhhhhhh
>>28084199
and i couldnt bullshit that?
If you're going to do this you want to untie you tie, undo the top few buttons and roll up your sleeves.
Or you could not be autistic and dress normally and park near the building.
This gave me a good chuckle >>28083807
>>28084562
im going to go in prob with my tie half off
>I'm a shakin' & makin' happenin stock..banker guy
Yeah ok, Bateman, good luck.
>>28084681
whats the worst that can happen? I mean really cant be worth then my shit life story
Make sure you can explain why you are working when the markets are closed.
>>28084769
day trading, correcting others errors ?
>>28083763
Everyone will think that you're weird for being 27 and bothering to go to a shitty college part with 18-19 year olds regardless of how successful you pretend to be
>>28083763
nigga lookin like the pokemon golem an shit
>>28083763
make sure to wear a bluetooth m8
>>28084696
Dude, you're going to be selling them so much lines, you're bound to foul up and get caught in some lie.
If they're normie enough, you can BS you're way out of it by chugging the nearest alcoholic beverage and slurring out something like "I mean, right?"
>>28084812
Also this.
>>28084869
do u think they will really grill me at a party after i spew my bs
>>28084776
Have a good time at the party.
>>28084963
Maybe, you're an older man, with a career and all, remember?
Just saiyan, dude.
>>28085049
true i think ill be able to BS somewhat if i feel it going bad ill just leave, or ill just get fucked up dunno
>>28085056
Update us after the party please.
Bring pics if you get laid
>>28085336
ill update tomorrow or in like an hour if things go bad leaving now
>>28085364
Is this a joke? That's a terrible tie and buttonup combo it looks like you're a NEET who has no idea how people in the business world dress
>i move and shake with stocks
>>28085380
no its what im wearing, anyway leaving now
>>28085393
Don't even bother going if you're dressed like that
>>28085408
too late said i was going and im dressed so whatever wish me luck
>>28085384
lmao what the fuck is that?
>>28084199
chuckle sensibly at Chad, wink at Stacy, and say "it's a lot more complicated than that, buddy"
oh yeah, and
>cobstanzeface.png
>>28085443
Holy fuck OP is that really what you look like? You think that is what someone in finance wears to work? You look like you are going to a high school dance or wedding or something.
>>28085882
yea listen it didnt work out at all, everyone was drunk and no one wanted to hear me talk. i tried to hug one girl and act like i knew her from class and she looked freaked out so now im back home
>>28083763
How'd you get invited? When I was in college our crew had a couple buddies that were like early 30s come party with us they were cool as fuck. im probably tighter with those guys than a bunch the kids my age. Be yourself man have fun get drunk
>>28085949
a kid i used to be tight with in hs invited me, but its over now im back home it sucked. no wonder i mainly just stay home terrible waste of time
>>28085924
Oh.
WELL, shit, you gave it a shot, right?
>>28085967
yea i guess now im home and comfy as fuck, and feel better then being there
>>28083834
That is the most retarded thing I ever heard. DRESS NORMALLY YOU AUTIST. Don't try to look different on purpose.
>>28084296
No. You can't bullshit this. If anyone there knows about finance you will be fucked. The finance rabbit hole CLEARLY goes deeper than you know. It isn't some simple shit.
>>28085443
hahahahaha holy shit
lose some weight
>>28085364
>>28085443
what the guck possessed you to dress like a guy going to prom?
>black detail shirt
>baby blue tie wtf
>tie is a kipper
mate. if you came from work, literally ANY average office job: black or grey pants. white shirt. red tie.
how are you so retarded? you must've been the only guy there dressed like that and it doesn't look like you came from work it looks like you dressed up intentionally for a party.
and then you left after 30mins.
brool story co
>>28087083
>red tie
what the fuck?
you are just as retarded as the guy you called retarded
>>28083763
I doubt they'll care too much what you rode up in.
You can do the dress shirt and business pants if you want but jeans and a decent quality casual button down would be better.
Don't wear a tie.
If you want to lie and say you're in finance go for it but for fuck's sake don't talk about yourself too much.
Have a good story for why you're there. Say you're an alum and that you only graduated a couple years ago- it'll make it seem less weird.
Have you been to a party recently? Ever?
Last piece of advice- don't go in expecting to get laid.
Chat people up, divide your attention pretty evenly between men and women. Don't act creepy- put up fun vibes. If you're attractive there's an okay chance that you'll pull anyways.
Don't be a faggot.
You're welcome.
>>28083834
Idiot
>>28083854
You're going to say that to a business major (or anyone who isn't a massive idiot) and people are going to be wondering why you went through the trouble of lying about your career.
Don't do this.
>I plan to get so drunk and say i cant drive which i hope they will think im responsible and end up back at there dorm or house
Bad plan.
Re-evaluate.
>>28085364
You look bad dude.
Just dress like a normal person.
Act like a normal person.
Jesus fucking christ.
The best part is if he finds girls who are sufficiently drunk this may very well work
>>28085822
>Chad: What the fuck dude, do you really work in finance?
>Stacy: Did you just wink at me? You know I have a boyfriend, right? Chad can you take me to my car- I don't feel safe
>>28085924
>everyone was drunk and no one wanted to hear me talk.
No shit. It was a party. Have you ever been to a party before?
> i tried to hug one girl and act like i knew her from class and she looked freaked out
Fucking rapist piece of shit.
Burn in hell.
>so now im back home
Not for long.
I've alerted the police.
Have fun in jail, predator.
perhaps if you had diversified more
>>28085364
Don't forget to bring your fedora
>>28085364
>wew lad
Just yourself already
![hqdefault[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/Hwe04oK.jpg "hqdefault[1].jpg")
>>28087156
>not dresing like a professional
>>28085364
This is just sad. You dress like a high school kid at his first job as a part time valet.
>>28083763
Why would you go to a party in the first place?
>>28083913
Going to a party and making up a bullshit background story about yourself is going to make you look sketchy as fuck and more of a laughingstock. If you're looking to make friends/gf they will not stay with you after they find out the truth.
Lastly, no one turns up to a casual party in a suit. Even high-flying execs would wear more casual clothes. The only people who do this are fedora lords.
>>28085983
OP I'm in college and I'm 20. Judging from your appearance, there is nothing that would make you stand out at a party. I wouldn't be like "who's that guy" or "he looks older, what's he doing here". You look like a normal guy. If you hadn't thought so much about this, and just worn normal clothes, you would have had a good time and no one would have questioned it.
>>28085364
End yourself. You look poor as fuck like an extra from 'My big fat gypsy wedding'
>>28085443
Drop that tie OP, Jesus Christ
This happens when you browse /fa/
>>28085443
Holy shit
Untuck shirt, remove tie, unbutton top two buttons.
Cmmon man.
>All the dumbasses believing that's actually OP.
The saddest part is that OP decided to go for a party when he clearly is too autistic.
And he is also a rapist (with that hugging the girl part)
