Food has always been an obsession for me. I either cook elaborate meals from scratch or, if I'm too depressed to leave 4chan/bed (which is pretty often) I can easily not eat for 18/20 hours at a time. Then I can eat a whole pizza as the only meal of the day (but it's still only 1500 calories). There are lots of things I won't eat cause I feel that modern food culture and options are pathetic. I often don't trust meals cooked for me... cause my parents made disgusting food with out of date meats and hair in it.
I have very few symptoms of anorexia (was "tested"), bmi of 17...and I don't feel the reported motivations of anorexics.
I judge people on their weight and associate bodily shapes with people who have hurt me. I can't get enough of shows about diet and bodies and weight management... and even have a kind of adipose fetish.
AMA I guess.
I'm a girl... anyone interested yet?
>>28051815
Hello and sorry for your struggles. My question is would you date a manlet?
>>28052166
>i judge people on their weight and associate bodily shapes with people who have hurt me.
What does this mean? Like if a person with a certain body shape "hurt" (lol) you you would avoid everyone with that particular shape?
>>28052166
Do you own any cats? Names and colors? :3
>>28052287
Would just be silently repulsed, a gut feeling
>>28052353
No cats
>>28051815
Cats really shouldn't be eating pizza
i eat only like 1000 calories a day and once i get hungry enough eat some extra fast food bs
for a while last year i was purging every week
>>28052270
below 5'6" would be an issue but depends
>>28051815
How much do you weigh?
original
I am a 6'2 man and I weigh 108lbs, and I have been losing weight over the last few months because I have a severe eating disorder.
Here are a list of habits I have developed in the last few months
I can't help it. I am scared of calories. My whole family is obese and I must not become like them. I will rot into my grave before I eat a 'global warming bar' (which is what my father calls a coconut flavored chocolate bar which has been submerged in salted water and then sandwiched between fried fish, apparently it represents an island sinking underwater)
They also have lots of little mottos like 'calories are our pal-ories!' and always make fun of me for my eating disorder
>walk downstairs last week to get a glass of cold water to quench my hunger
>dad sees me
>I am shirtless
>he looks disgusted
>'jesus christ son I can see your ribcage, is that cage going to be for the hamster your faggot boyfriend shoved up your ass?'
>laughs in my face
>walks off with 2 bags of chips and a hummus
>>28053045
Did it just develop that way? What do you do to "motivate" yourself and not just give into the hunger?
Doesn't seem like you're aiming to be something (like girls who want to be stick-thin boyish models) except not being a fatass like your family.Once I get away from my family and live on my own I'm scared I'll become like you. I'm 6"1' 245lbs right now and I fucking hate it so much.
>>28051815
I'm the same way, OP. I'll either cook elaborate 3 star Michelin food or order a pizza. There's not much middle ground, and yes only eat once a day or maybe every other day. High 5
1500 cals is not especially low for a day and almost all pizzas have more than 1500 cals
>>28053130
I am NEET and pretty much dedicate every waking moment to ensuring I don't gain weight.
Here is my average day at the moment
>7am wake up
>7.10am brush teeth with black coffee and toothpaste to supress hunger
>7.30am more coffee
>7.50am more coffee
>8am obese mother and father wake up. At this point I lay stomach down on the floor like a snake and let their footsteps make my stomach rumble. This feeling lets me know that my stomach rumbles due to their weight not my hunger
>9am maybe have an apple or some grapes
>Parents leave for work at this point
>9am-10am make a note of every food item in the fridge, cupboards etc and add the total calories
>check against the previous days food and find the difference
>divide the calories by 4 (based on 1 sister ans parents and me) and assume I ate a quarter of the food, motivating me to eat less
>10am-1pm play videogames whilst eating a plate of carrot sticks
>1pm-4pm clean the house, ensuring I remove any crumbs so I don't accidentally breathe in calories
>4pm-6pm cook dinner, usually tinned tuna with more grapes
>6.20pm dad gets home and makes dinner for the rest of the family
>6.40pm mother gets in
>around 7pm family eats
>I listen through the floorboards and every time I hear a chewing noise count it as 5 calories in my diet
>7pm-11pm hide in bedroom to avoid family, no food available
>11pm they go to bed, I go downstairs and have a single piece of fruit
>12am go to bed
>>28053324
Anon that sounds so unrealisticly extreme that I'm willing to bet it's actually real. Seek help, anon. You're killing yourself.
I'm bulimic and kind of the same as you, OP except I end up vomiting everything I eat lol.
I won't eat if I don't feel like getting up or purging.
But I make buffets for myself every once in a while and then binge/purge afterwards
This is not really a special snowflake disorder, it is the step between anorexia and bulimia.
That and some anxiety going on there, (judging types creating groups, bad the good) in order to better protect yourself is a defence mechanism, people have it as a teenager, it goes away but comes back in middle age.
I would suggest you are nearing bulimia, very close and would be a young female of college age.
>>28053482
But I don't deliberately restrict food or throw it up. I also don't think I'm too fat or intend to lose weight
>>28053324
OP here. Anon I will believe you if you can explain how you eat less than 400 calories a day and stay alive. I don't understand stories of extreme restriction when eating:
Bowl of cereal
Packet of crisps
Banana
Apple
Portion of rice
Chicken breast
Chocolate biscuit
Glass of milk
comes to less than 1000 calories and will bring you to 60lb (i.e. dead) without even doing any exercise. You must mean you diet for a few days at a time and then eat more than the average person for weeks in between.
>>28054243
Not the person you're replying to, but EDs aren't always caused by feeling fat or the need to lose weight, sometimes it relieves anxiety or whatever. From your description it sounds like you might have a binge eating disorder which is actually really common. If you have the time I would suggest reading the first part of Dr. Fairburn's book Overcoming Binge Eating if you have the time.
>>28053045
my family doesn't sound as bad as yours senpai, but I don't want to be like my parents either, fat is gross. I stopped losing weight for a while, but I've started again since november and I'm now down to 118lb. I'm pretty happy with my body at the moment, but there's still part of me that wants to keep going
