>26 kv
im losing my virginity in 3-4 hours. ask me anything
> give up trying to take online dating seriously after 4 months of nothing
> message girls "are you ready for the D"
> mfw someone actually wants it
> she is picking me up in 2-3 hours and we are having sex in the back of her truck
dont give up fellow robots, its all about random luck
Bring a gun in case she's a catfishing murderer
Then you post a load in your pants before she can even get undressed.
>>28001646
>having sex in the back of her truck
You gon get raped boy
>>28001676
if im going to have any problem i think it would be staying hard but im hoping for the best. ive been death gripping 3 times a day for years
>>28001664
>>28001688
this, OP you are very likely to get raped and possibly murdered, no sane woman is actually going to do that, be careful dude i am serious
Fap before you go.
Maybe OP will get raped by a tranny and then be made to suck his balls for 10 mns.
>>28001664
>>28001688
>>28001716
get out of here with the negativity man. she is 29 and a bit overweight its believable
>>28001725
You deliciously evil bastard.
>>28001716
Thanx for the (You) anon. You don't know how much that means to me, these things are rare these days.
>>28001646
jerk that cock beforehand or you'll last 2 seconds when u put it in
>>28001646
>message girls "are you ready for the D"
gave me a good laugh picturing you goofing your way around asking women if they want penis
>>28001761
>overweight
She's definitely gonna rape OP
this could at absolute worst involve you getting kidnapped, raped, killed etc and at absolute best involve you struggling to get hard and not knowing what to do while some landwhale laughs at you.
Please keep us updated man
>>28001793
what do you guys mean rape? im going willingly to have sex
>>28001646
Maybe you get the rape-AIDS maybe you get the fat chick herp.
Maybe it's all b8.
Good luck anon, I hope it's a woman and she wants a fuck and you both have a great time. Be safe and make sure you use a condom.
>>28001840
We mean it's a guy and you're going to get raped.
It should be pretty fucking obvious anon.
>>28001840
It's probably a fat pedophile that's gonna rape you in his van, kill you and leave you in a ditch. Do yourself a favor and don't go OP
rip in peace OP
345ergdf34
>>28001871
>>28001716
>>28001688
>>28001664
YOLO OP YOLO
Get her to let you film it and post results on r9k for all the robots to worship you.
Shit would be seriously cash - to see a fellow robot actually hand in the v-card.
>>28001849
>>28001867
>>28001871
>>28001906
she said bring condoms, i think that would be a legit girl concern. i already gave her my address its happening. obviously if i go to enter the truck and there is a guy im not going to enter/
i've seen this girls profile before in the past i really doubt some killer would go through all the trouble when they could just pick a random victim irl and leave no digital evidence
>>28002005
You're probably right.
Post pics if you get murdered.
>>28002005
you are a fucking retard, you think a stranger would accept to enter your vehicle on their own?
only you are stupid enough, literally dumber than a child that knows not to do that, i do hope you get murdered after the rape so your stupidity won't multiply itself
>>28002068
>>28002074
you wont get me with your red pill anon. i want to be happy
OP's gonna get the BBC and probably an std or two.
>>28002099
>hops on the train to cucksville
bye asshole
you mother fuckers have me second guessing the situation now.
Hey anons I think I found the "girl"'s van. pic related
>>28002099
>sex
>happiness
It's this kind of delusion that makes me breathe easier knowing im not even close to the worst on /r9k/
>give up on online dating
>in last burst of desperation message 4-5 girls "hi im a 20 years old KHV (kissless hugless virgin)"
>short haired qt replies "omg im here for u"
>talk for couple of hours
>she deletes account next day and I never got her contact info
I fucked up so bad.
>>28002164
Don't go OP, it's a trap. Just fap man
>>28002164
It's legit dude, some girls are just thirsty. Bring a six pack and smash her all night. Come back and see us after you've become a man.Because I want to live vicariously through your success
>>28001646
>she is picking me up in 2-3 hours and we are having sex in the back of her truck
Oh wow OP this doesn't sound like it's going to end well.
>>28002272
>tfw OP is dead by now
>>28002480
The old OP is dead. We'll never see him again because he's going to turn Chad and turn his back on us losers.
>>28002513
We'll never see him again because he's beef jerky by now.
>>28002513
Bitch plz he's dead or has been kidnapped too bad RIP OP
Rest in rips OP ;__;7
>>28001695
IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES IT GOES GUILLOTINE YYAAAAAAAH
What's wrong with being careful? Bring something for defense Incas it's a trap. If not have fun
>>28002689
He's dead anon, he's not coming back
>>28002748
All he had to do was listen just a little bit, or maybe even give a little information to us or his family so that he won't be tortured for weeks in a dark basement in the 100% case he'll get kidnapped.
Yet another robot falls in the eternal void needlessly. I wonder how many that makes for this year alone.
We gonna keep this thread alive in case OP returns?
>>28002858
Nah, let's end this thread. It's over. Someone call the police and stop bumping fags.
>>28002885
Call the police and tell them what exactly? We don't even know for sure if OP lives in the US.
>>28002858
>>28002885
>>28002906
i was getting ready. i showered cut my pubes half-assed, shaved my face and put gel in my hair. im looking pretty good
i want to give you info incase i die but i dont want you to know any of my info lol. i still have another hour + before it happens
Meanwhile, somewhere...
>>28002959
Then tell your family or friends that something might have happened to you if you don't text or call them in several hours.
>>28002993
But all things must come to an end...
>>28002959
Oh fuck OP you're still alive. Well tell us your name, phone number and address in case you do die
>>28001646
two possible outcomes:
>1) it was a joke, no one shows up
>2) you'll get murdered
>>28002993
>>28003029
im a male that weights 170lbs, i dont think i can get kidnaped
>>28002355
ill do it for you
>>28003068
Oh you're 170lbs? You're all good then man don't have a single worry :^)))))
Fucking retard.
>>28002959
Take some garlic and a cross with you just in case
>>28003029
I've seen this gif before. You anon are the cancer that is infecting all the boards on 4chan kys
>>28003029
how mentally fucked up was the creator of this gif?
>>28003118
>tfw you were unironically called cancer
>>28001646
OP, be careful. I know this one 3/10 bitch that uses tinder to fuck guys on the regular then complains about not having a BF. I hate her, her best friend isn't like her, she's quite the opposite I don't want to fuck her friend though she's 5/10 I'm at least 6.5/10 I could do better. But anyway I just wanted to warn you because she had a pregnancy scare last month and got crotch rot from some beta.
>>28003166
There was another accompanying gif that shows the girl happily eating next to the machine, implying it's all fake. Never saved it though. A pity.
>>28003225
There's another one that she gets penetrated by a press in the vagina and her guts fall out. Then the next gif is her sitting eating yogurt sitting on it.
OP here, I just went outside to her car and shat my pants, literally. The poo was watery and dribbling down my leg so I ran back inside and now I'm crying.
I'm about to go to a hotel and meet a hooker.
inb4 I get partyv& because FUCKING BETAS YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO LOSE YOUR VIRGINITY REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>>28003485
this isnt me.
its almost go time, she just texted why cant we use your place? i said my "roommate" aka brother is home so i cant.
i think its legit
>>28003528
It's probably fine, but you're going to regret it anyway because those women are disgusting. Or she'll demand money
>>28003528
definitely a burglar
>>28003528
Think your bro would cockblock you?
>>28003812
its not that it would just be awkward. we both live in the basement and hes sleeping until work time right now. i dont want to bring in some random girl fuck for the first time and distrub everything
>>28003876
fair. how are you preparing for the situation? did you bring some alcohol? grab some blankets?
Hey guys,
Remember that time OP thought he was getting laid but actually go murdered?
Seems like it was only today.
You need Spiderman as emotional support in case things go bad
I agree
Let's support OP
>>28003897
i only got myself fancied up nothing else. she only has until 3-5. from my understanding we are driving somewhere secluded (her words) and just going off.
you fucks just made me ask her for a current picture because im afraid of dying
Try not to get framed for rape if she ends up being crazy
My advice ?
Don't die.
That's my advice.
>>28004028
OP, you do understand the possibility that she's not alone in the car right? That there's a Meth-Chad in there waiting to mug you, right?
>>28002005
>i already gave her my address
You dense fuck, why didn't you tell her to meet at an Arby's near you?
>>28004100
this, there was a story of this guy that went with one chick to get laid and ended up being a sex slave for over a year in some meth head den
>>28004155
> inb4 that's OP's fetish
>>28004129
>Roasty at McRoast
>>28004155
like that's putting OP off
>>28004028
>from my understanding we are driving somewhere secluded (her words)
Yeah... RIP.
she just sent me a current picture in the seat of her truck. shes coming in 40minutes im going to be alright. i will check the back seat as soon as i enter and make some autistic jump out of the car if i see anyone else
>>28004254
What if they draw a gun on you the moment you get in/approach?
>>28004290
then we'll never hear OP's story of glory
>>28001646
Bring a gun or knife anon
Then if it turns out to be a fraud post pics of his/her dead body
>>28004290
they are cowards they arent just going to gun me down in front of my house. ill just run.
but lads my dick hasnt been able to get hard all day since i had this feeling in my stomach. not getting it up feels like a real thing
>>28004254
>you get in
>she presses the button to lock the van doors
>meth chad from the back seat incjects some drugs into your bloodstream
>you become cum dumpster for hobos
or this >>28004290
>>28004325
>bring a knife
>not katana
no tip for you normie REEEEEE
Go with the mindset that you are going to fight a methhead. You can't beat a meth head so just stun them and run
>>28004254
Lmao
These cucks are just joshin u bro. Just good natured ribbing
U wont get shot or raped in all likelihood. But there is a legit 15% chance and uve gotta give a euphoric nod to that fact before u walk out the door
Hopefully u end up with somethin similar to pic related. Roll the dice
dubs for whether OP gets murdered?
>>28004488
OP IS KILL
RIP
Fghfhygb
>>28004356
>>28004417
im rolling the dice today and im prepared to deal with jesse from breaking bad. its happening in less than 30mins
>>28004488
god dammit
dont let this thread die for the 2 hours im gone
>>28004488
o fuck
she just texted on her way and my heart is racing.
LMAO i wont be able to get it up
>>28004488
>Hitler Dubs
>On 420
For fuck's sake OP STAY HOME.
>>28004521
dont let this thread die for the 2 hours im gone
Lad, from >>28004488 and >>28004522 I gather that this thread will share your fate. I'm outta here.
>>28004545
Drink some alcohol, I find that helps.
>>28004488
Shit, it's happening
>>28004545
That should had been your first concern actually fucking virgin. Try masturbating a bit or sonething
>>28004607
it doesn't work like that if it's a psychological block of the cock
>>28004521
>don't let this thread die while I'm gone
We can't keep the thread up forever, robro. Rest in Peace, friend.
Live for me op
Live in the memory of all of us
>>28004329
hurry watch some porn
>>28002164
OP i'm a 22 year old 300-lb vrigin. Please go just in case it's legit.
>>28004521
I'm rooting for you brother!
>>28004545
if u catch another look at this thread, you watch out for any sudden movements that aren't fuck related
u saw those Hitler double-dubs
stay on guard robot
survive oppie
>>28004735
he's going to be rooting for us all kek
>>28004521
Good luck, OP
Tell us what the other side looks like
U N D E R P R E S S U R E
T W O H E A R T S B O R N T O R I S E
D R Y C O U N T Y W H E R E W E A R E S W I M M I N I N T H E S A N D
OP is going to cuck us all and not provide any pics it happened.
>>28004999
Dead men don't deliver.
it would be awesome if OP came back after like 2 years with greentext of being kidnapped and sexually abused untill he was finally rescued by police. Or some hardcore shit like being abducted and made into shemale.
>>28004619
then is there hope?
>>28005034
>>28005085
Somehow I feel Op won't get it up or the chick will have second thoughts about it
really how often does this happen for non chads?
>>28005115
it happens plenty amongst the below average but not completely repulsive dregs of society
>OP is literally getting his eyes gouged out this very moment
>>28005115
It isn't as unusual as you think.
Some girls want fucking and don't have massively high standards.
Get on Tinder, like every single grill that comes up and every time you get a match ask "Want to bang?"
Your results might surprise you.
>OP is feeling the sticky wet goodness of poon for the first time in his life
>>28005330
>OP is feeling the searing pain of a hot iron rod shoved up his asshole for the first time
>>28005304
Dubs OP is still alive and achieving more than most of us will
>>28005368
OP confirmed dead
o meng good luck op
>>28005368
Oh fuck
Le oregano comment
>>28005376
The only death OP is suffering is "the little death"..
if dubs OP is literally getting his boipussi destroyed right now by big black cocks in a damp cellar
>>28005473
if dubs OP is getting waterboarded
>>28005494
if dubs OP is dead already
com back opie
1 more hour lads.
If dubs, OP has been killed and his corpse gets skullfucked by two meth Chads.
So long OP! It was nice (not)knowing you.
>>28005633
Fug
Originale comnente
>>28004569
Lmao OP started new thread guys
>>28005633
No no no, this can't be happening!
>>28005633
No such thing as method chad..
>>28005633
so long seet original prince , you did your best
>>28005633
Just to be sure i'll check again
if dubs op is dead.
>>28005085
>Or some hardcore shit like being abducted and made into shemale.
Well at least he will be the cute wife of a renowned surgeon
>>28005633
if trips OP was alive and just joshin us the whole time. he just went to jerk off to anime babes for a while.
if no trips then yeah >>28005633 was right, rip nigga
>>28004129
>arbys
I see what you did there.
>>28005633
Oh dear...
Please be safe OP. If it goes well there might still be hope for me.
>>28005826
Either way it goes well - either OP gets laid or OP exits. Win/Win
>>28005702
Is OP somewhere in between life and death?
>>28005952
We need to know
>>28005952
he's neither alive nor dead at the moment
>schroedinger's op
>>28005999
Oh no.
We could have stopped it.
Now OP will remain a vegetable for the rest of his life.
>>28001646
Kidnapped/10.
>>28005999
Trips confirm
Comment original
op rn
>>28005999
>Schroedingers trips
There ia hope!
The last 2 digits of this post is how many uears until OPs body is found
>>28005999
he is what then? OP needs to come back and update us
>>28001646
OP here.. she never showed up.
>>28006207
prove you are op
>>28006201
I don't believe you.
WHERE DID YOU PUT OP BODY?
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>>28006207
Obviously not OP, didn't even post a picture. OP doesn't use periods at the end of his posts either
>>28006247
>OP doesn't use periods at the end of his posts either
Finally I see another expert on anonligraphy. This is key to catfishing and false flagging.
>>28006269
YEAH IMPLYING YOU'RE NOT BUYING TIME TO BURY OP BODY
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
im back everyone. i didnt get kidnapped it was just a landwhale heres my story
>jump in her 2015 silver ram, check back seat and introduce myself
>she says her name and i notice missing teeth
>ask where we are going
>out of town after we get condoms
>plead with her to go somewhere closer but she assures we will get caught there
>akward silence
>turn on some tunes
>exact some small chat while we are driving on dirt roads and shit forever
>we finally find a spot to her liking
>i jump into the back seat never leaving the truck so i cannot be deserted
>she exits the truck and gets in back
>we start getting naked
>ok now what do i do?
>she asks if im underage probably because im in decent shape and have a young face
>its as i have feared i could not get it up.
>she tries to explain foreplay, i look at that giant pussy and say im not eating you out
>shes like then im not blowing you, you gotta give to get
>im sitting there jerking as hard as i can while shes saying play with my boobs, most guys have no problem getting hard
>she puts my hand in her vagina and i start rubbing hard while she is receiving pleasure visibly
>soft as pudding still
>she takes her cellphone out and starts playing porn while i finger blast her and try to get hard
>after awhile i finally say well this isnt going to happen
>she is visibly disappointed but knew that
>we put our pants on and i jump into front seat while she exits and reenters the front
>have awkward conversaion on the trip back and how i have to be willing to give girls head
LANDWHALES NOT EVEN ONCE. i have learnt my lesson lads my virginity is still in tact
>>28001646
Post a thread after she is done butt fucking your boipussy, there is a good chance you will get robbed and BLACKED tonight
>>28006247
Surprisingly accurately...do you have autism senpai?
Well doesn't matter.
>>28006207
Fuck off faggot.
>>28006312
I for one believe this actually is OP
>>28006312
heartily kekked there OP, hope you learned your lesson about landwhales
>>28006312
I'm glad you're okay anon
>>28006312
i forgot to mention she cracked the code that i was a virgin. i was giggling a lot then she said so thats why you are so akward
>>28006312
Yeesh oregano
>>28006368
Don't worry OP - I went home with a landwhale once and couldn't get it up.
pressure + unattractive != boner
>>28006312
Do most guys have no problems getting hard to landwhales?
>>28006312
Your dick did you a favor.
>>28006404
yeah, prolly saved op from having AIDS
>>28006312
Well, great to know that you're alive anyway
>>28002635
>/mu/ meme bands
Consider suicide
>>28006312
>she says her name and i notice missing teeth
This was never going to end well
>>28006312
Post the pic of the girl in her truck you mentioned earlier as proof that you are OP.
>>28006509
Don't do this, I just ate.
>>28006354
i should have gone into more detail, i was to excited to update everyone how it went
>>28006364
i did man. im never going to act desperate for sex again. when i saw that pussy i was absolutely disgusted but i wanted to be nice so i didnt say anything
>>28006365
>>28006422
thank you <3
>>28006404
probably
>>28006429
this to be honest. the teeth + giant fat bulging legs i was turned off instantly
>>28006509
heres her pic. i got scammed hard there was no warning about missing teeth or giant fat legs
>>28006557
>i should have gone into more detail, i was to excited to update everyone how it went
I really did believe it was you OP
>>28006557
Fat girls always take these cropped bullshots. Always look for full-body pictures.
>>28006557
Doesn't look half bad But I'm glad you are safe op and not in some dungeon getting surgery
>>28006557
Oh shit I know this girl. Linking her this thread.
>>28006557
She doesn't look too bad there.
With no teeth and bulging cellulite thighs though I'd go off her a bit.
>>28006557
doesn't even look bad in that picture, but missing teeth are a red flag, as are fat legs. i don't even imagine the pussy after what you said about it. still, well played anon!
>>28006629
I'm at a loss to believe this has never been posted in r9k before.
>>28006557
I am dissapoint OP.
You could of been a sorcer'er not just a shitty wizard.
Glad your not butt molested or dead though.
>>28006557
>no results on google search.
Well shit, it seems legit.
I was hoping you would have a good experience to give me some hope. It was just another horror story with a hamplanet roastie and being unable to get hard, just the type of shit that makes me not want to leave my KHV status.
Guess I'm sticking to 2D and seeking magical powers then.
>>28006681
How do you safely get an escort?
fyi you not getting it up was not because she was fat but simply because you were nervous
that fades, but tbqh a new girl is always making you (me) more nervous the first 2 times
>>28006720
WHY IS SHE SO SURPRISED HE'S EATING ICE CREAM IF HE EATS ICE CREAM EVERY DAY
>>28006741
Maybe she just finally decided to ask her desu
>>28006720
honestly its not worth losing your khv status unless the girl is actually hot. that is the lesson i take away from today.
on the way back she said send me a pic of your dick hard later so i get to see it.
>mfw i say ok but never want to see this girl again
>>28006312
better luck next time OP! Glad you're okay
>>28006811
She doesn't sound like that bad a person.
>>28006312
get some horny goat weed next time
>>28006841
she was really kind and understanding for sure. i was the idiot in this situation. im sure she will make some normie guy happy
>>28006811
kek it was probably for the better Anon.
Maybe save some cash and go for a hot escort next time.
>>28006312
lmfao
I knew that brutal murder storyline was gonna yield great results
>>28006811
don't act all mighty because you consider yourself more attractive than her. If that's how you feel, then you shouldn't expect an attractive girl to be nice to you either
>>28006724
http://www.exchangeandmart.co.uk/used-cars-for-sale/ford/escort/any-distance-from-ss7-1aa
>be /fit/, attractive
>tfw there are literally no uggos/slampigs where i live
>too autistic to get laid by socializing
Fuck my shitty life.
>>28007019
Wiseguy, ehehe?
>>28007033
There is a third way ...
Begins with R,
Ends with E,
And it's not romance!
>>28007104
Is it REEEEEEEE?
>>28007104
I can't believe you, of all people, would make such a depraved joke.
>>28007033
i have actually been talking to another girl and she wants to hang out on sunday, what do i feel? i feel like i should cancel that now. the worst part is this isnt the first time i didnt get it up. back when i was like 19 my friend that could get laid set up a threesome with us and some girl. i couldnt get it up and just left the room and sat there while they banged
>>28007163
Is she more attractive than this one?
>>28001646
If I were a gay 40yo this is exactly how I'd find little bitchbois to rape
>>28007190
i mean kind of. she is still overweight but you get to see a body pic. I DONT KNOW MAN i cant see that fat pussy again
i want off this ride. the girl today kept asking me what i liked about porn like grilling me hard how the fuck do you even answer that i just said "uh the fucking" "well you need to get hard to do that" fucking ROASTED
>>28007163
You psyched your self out. Probably had nothing to do with her looks you were just so sure of your failure you anxiety'd your penis to death if you would of just be like zomg boobs you would of hit it and felt better.
>>28007163
take some viagra next time, it'll help you gain some confidence
>>28007304
this.
blueys ftw
>>28006312
Well at least you didn't get your kidney stolen.
When you put it in, and suddenly realize pussy is gross, and not all its hyped up to be.
>>28005865
I never thought of it that way.
>Meet up with random
>50/50 chance you get laid or get express ticket to hell.
Fuck all I can't lose. Downloading Tinder as we speak.
>>28006312
glad you weren't pathetic enough to eat a landwhale's nasty reeking pussy
>>28004646
We can damn well try robots.
>>28007017
Well to be fair he says he's fit at least.
I'm not good looking, but I take care of myself. I would much rather fuck an ugly girl with a normal body than a fat bitch. Never mind a fat girl with missing teeth like the one OP almost fucked, I'm definitely not expecting to hook up with a hot girl. Unless you're fat yourself and don't take care of your teeth, nobody deserves that desu.
>>28007104
This took me a while I'll admit
OP here, guys i really dont know what to think after this experience. all these years i thought i wanted pussy but i couldnt perform. is it really because she was fat? probably but what the fuck am i going to do with myself now? that means i can only meet attractive girls and im not at that point in my life theres no one one would want me.
im trapped again in a prison i hate life
>>28006312
>>have awkward conversaion on the trip back and how i have to be willing to give girls head
She can't even get you hard and she thinks she's entitled to oral? Also why even use condoms if you're just going to resort to skin on skin contact for STD risks anyways?
>>28008925
don't give up OP
If you really, truly don't think anyone would want you, it's because you're in a bad place. I mean, geographically. Try online dating.
