I've been gone for half a year now. But fuck it, no other board wants to hear my shit.
> 20yo., 5"7' ugly skeleton, pessimistic,misanthrope, socially anxious, suicidal/homicidal tendencies
> JUST.jpg
> Hikki since I dropped out of HS a year ago
> Doctor will probably stop giving me doctor certificates, because I refuse to take the meds he prescribes me.
> Because of that government payments are cut off completely 100%
> Mom is working 9 to 5 for me and still short on cash
> Won't be able to keep up living expenses if my government pay goes down to 0
> Been delaying suicide for stupid reasons like "Hey, another doctors certificate for 2 weeks and there's still this one manga I wanted to read. Oh welp, might as well stick around for that long!"
> Now's the perfect time to do it, though.
Doctor's appointment tomorrow at 9am. Let's see what he says. Is a .25 ACP enough to kill me or will I turn into a brainless veggie if I would try it? Gun laws here are very strict, so I can't hope for anything better than this. I even got the .25ACP through pure coincidence. Next would be three vertical wrist cuts or hanging.
>>27999489
You could always get a job and do stuff like the rest of us.
You skinny.
Try being the same as you but fat.
Go jogging. Wish i could.
>>27999512
I'm not mentally stable enough to work. Absolutely no one would hire me and even with, the only thing that would happen is that I would probably get money to live longer. And that's not a good thing. Still thanks for the reply.
>>27999512
this. theres no point in suicide. its the pussiest option you have. basically giving a big fuck you to anybody who ever loved you in your life. its not like you have any justified reason to do this. get off the computer, think about what you want to do with your life instead of overloading your brain with screen time. if your relatively healthy and able bodied then you have no idea whats in store for you in the future. i have friends who were like you who ended up being more successful than me. stop treating yourself like you have some justification to hate or kill yourself. you dont and nobody does. just stop feeling sorry for yourself and get out there and do something. stay away from morbid stuff. pray to god, even if you dont believe it, it will still help you. life is a gift not a curse stop treating it like one. even if you go through pain its still a gift to experience pain and understand what life is about. you have a chance to use your time to do something amazing even if it only affects one persons life.
>>27999801
Like I said, I'm a Hikki that leaves his apartement, exactly twice a week, to go to my doc. I couldn't jog for 10 seconds even if my life depended on it. Sad to hear, that you're in a similar situation, though.
>>27999823
We seem to have completely different mindsets and it looks like you really believe in what you just wrote, so there is no point in arguing about it with you. Same with me, I'm so fixated on my life philosophy and world view, that I can't just make a U-Turn. I know I sound like a huge asshole, but what you just wrote is just stupid.
>>27999919
you might not understand this or even believe it but you are the future. if you kill yourself then there is no future. if your mom is supporting you, its because she instinctively knows you are the future. it would be one thing if you were giving your life for a noble cause. but if you kill yourself, your literally saying "im too selfish to do something to help you." theres no room for self pity here. if you do it then you literally forefiting everything. it makes you an idiot and it doesnt leave people who love you any better off. it makes them hate themselves and question why it happened in the first place. no person is worthless until they decide to waste their life by killing themselves. thats when you are truly worth nothing. even people who die with no malice or underlying negativity leave their families broken and scarred for the rest of their life. now much worse would it be for somebody who loves you to find you killed yourself? no matter how you view yourself, from somebody elses perspective on the outside looking in, not only is it a meaningless act, but it does nothing to help you. deep down its not what any human being wants. they want to live their life and achieve things. if you think you have justification to do this then your world view is highly flawed and lacks perspective.
just go outside dude. turn off your fucking computer and think. think about what you ever wanted out of your life. use your brain. mental illness is literally born from people who have too much time on their hands. you wouldnt have time to think about how much you hate your own life if you were actually doing anything productive. you complain about having issues, but what have you done to try and reslove them? if you do nothing but make excuses then you never tried to achieve anything, and you only get satisfaction out of life from actually putting forth effort to do something. the world doesnt cater to the whims of people who dont even try.
>>27999489
Smoke some weed, drink alcohol, do drugs, just anything to get you out of the shit mood. You cant get addicted to weed and you wont become an alcoholic after one time getting drunk. Embrace the good feeling you get from this high and you will want to get it again, so you will work to be able to afford it. Even being a drug addict is better than being dead
>>27999489
you seem really ordinary. just do more things, go for a walk and figure out what you can try. if you were "suicidal" you wouldn't be crying for attention.
>>28000105
the problem with your argumentation is that you are attempting to dominate with your perspective
no self-respecting suicidal person could submit and obey
>>27999489
>>27999489
just tell him you are taking the pills and throw them away you massive retard
>>28001086
Not him, but at least here in Germany your blood gets tested every month to assure the proper usage.
>>28001200
take the pills once a month
is this medication autism related?
>>27999489
just take the meds you fucking retard holy shit
>>27999489
The best way I'm aware of is to order some fentanyl over the darknet and take a significant amount over the ld50. Maybe order some oxy too and start off on that, if you want to be high and comfy before you take the fent.
Heart goes out to you brother, consider self improvement too :(
>>28001200
>he hasn't watched Gattaca (1997)
>>28001219
>>28001233
> Promoting brainmelting jewpills
Oyyyyy vey, aren't you good goyims!
>>27999489
Well OP, you could take the medicine and stop being such a faggot.
>>28001465
Get the fuck out /pol/ack
I'm quite suprised about how sincere you guys can be. Thanks a lot, you mean well, I think.
I would just take the fucking medicine. Shit, if I could get gov bucks I'd fuck my own shit up no hesitation.
Too many normies telling him to stop killing himself... of course it's easy for them to say to stop killing himself but they have no idea how bad he has it all the time, if you want to kill yourself just do it OP don't let anything stop you
>>28002278
We already lost enough robots in 2015. Today on Klebold&Harris appreciation day we should stick together for once.
>>27999489
If you're gonna kill yourself, go fuck up shit and have some fun before you do, just my advice
>slit writ and inner thigh
>.25 just below the ear angled upward
Should you paralyze yourself you'll still bleedout
>>28002392
nah, i prefer memes instead of blogposting. go dig a hole.
>>27999489
take the fucking pills
don't tell me you actually care about your health ?
>>27999489
Heres a tip.
Nobody dies from a gunshot to the head. You become a brain addled zombie. You survive.
Shoot your heart. Its much easier to hit, will die almost instantly (blood pressure drops to lose conciousness) and death is almost 100% from it.
Think about it, soldiers wear helmets, but a bullet proof vest is what prevents you from dying. Thats because center mass is where the vital organs are and you die quickly from it.
If you shoot your heart and blast your spine, all the quicker.
Good luck brother! I hope to see you when we get out of this hell!
>>28002048
Or, unless they're testing you, just say you took it? This shit is easy, come on man.
