Are looks even important?
>>27884883
fuck that four eyed twat
>>27884883
if you allow it, yes
>>27884883
wow he's so deep and interested in my opinions, would bang
>>27884883
Why is this guy always comparing life choices to choosing cereals?
Dick cereal man should fuck off.
>>27884985
He's a cereal connoisseur
>>27884883
i wanted to mock his hypocrisy by saying his wife is beautiful. check first just to be sure and... yeah
ugly as fuck, at least he's true to his word
>>27884883
>John Green
>John Green
>John Green
I can't even make a witty comment about this guy, the greatest meta-insult I can think of is to repeat his name in greentext form, not even a verb or anything. It's hard to describe but it's just
>John Green
Like
>John Green
Why is he so obsessed with his fucking cereal.
>>27884883
but that exactly how I pick my cereal. Is that guy retarded?
Surely this is fake, I mean this faggot can't possibly be comparing everything to cereal right!?
It's not even closely true though. Food is consistently chosen for appearance over taste. It's why the cooking channel and food porn are a thig and why foods aren't all just cooked to be a tasty gray ball.
>"Sometimes I wonder how people can even be depressed. I mean, it's like you go to the store and see that they're out of Fruity Pebbles. I get how that would be sad, but you have so many more cereals to choose from that there's no way you could be depressed." - John Green
this man loves cereal
>>27885075
i can't tell if this is fake
>>27884883
But I only love beautiful things anon. Love and beauty go together.
And ever since I got fat nobody loves me anymore.
>implying presentation isn't 3/4 of the meal at any good restaurant
john green wants you to fuck roasties
>>27884883
why is every quote i have seen by this guy about breakfast cereal?
Who is this john green guy? Is he a paid shill for cheerios?
>"Not letting other men fuck your wife is like refusing to share your box of cereal with a hungry friend" - John Green
>>27884883
Does this fucking nigger exclusively talk in breakfast cereal analogies?
>>27885086
he's obsessed
>>27884883
Can we just start attributing fuck tons of cereal anologies to John Green.
>>27885119
He's the author of a several books for teens that all star a girl that doesn't fit in because she is the square peg in the round hole.
>I always thought it was ridiculous that niggers could vote. It's like eating the wheat things in a box of Lucky Charms instead of just eating only the marshmallows and then drinking the milk after it turns blue.
-John Green
>>27885118
see >>27885119
Either that, or he's really stuck when it comes to new metaphors.
>"People with anxiety can be silly, like "I'm about to pour this bowl of Cap'n Crunch but I'm afraid there won't be any milk in the fridge". But the truth is sugary cereals like that taste just as good without any milk. Anyway, people masturbate too much." -John Green
"What do you mean who wont have sex with black guys, do you not eat chocolate flavored cereal just because it's also colored brown?"
>>27884883
What the fuck even is John Green? Is he that author who wrote those faggot cry cry books?
>>27885119
He's a shill for roasties and feminism. NuMale
>>27885086
he is right though, you can't undo your past
you can't un-murder someone either but that doesn't change the fact people might judge you for it
sleeping around is much less severe but im just putting in an example.
>>27885430
>"You talking about your dead grandma reminds me of a scene you could relate to from my book 'Finding Alaska'. There's at least one scene where they all get together and have Cinnamon Toast Crunch, and the guy on that box is super old! You get the idea." -John Green
John Green, official cuckold king of breakfast cereal
>>27885086
really hoping that "john green talking about cereal" becomes the next hot maymay
>>27885086
>decide to watch one of his history videos about
>its about south america
>spends the first 5 minutes of the video whining about white people
>>27884883
HAHAHAHHAHAHHAHHAA
I feel sorry for him being such an enormously massive supreme KEK
HAHAHHAHAHAH
>>27884883
Why do people care about getting a bit of semen on their face during a threeway with their bull?
It's like having a cereal eating contest and getting pissed off when some milk splashes in your bowl.
>>27884883
>listening to John "all human interactions and experiences can be explained through cereal analogies" green
>>27884883
silly john, trix are for kids!
>>27884883
Personality is reflected in looks. Dumb people are just meaty, dead-, animal-looking. You can tell an interesting person by their face.
>"your wife's cunt will eventually get soggy and old like a bowl of frosted flakes left in the sun. So eat it while it's crunchy"
-John Green
This guy is such a cuck its unbelievable.
You couldn't be any more of a cuck than John Green.
Hank's cool tho cuz he does scishow
>>27885622
I agree with this fellow random anonymous faggot
When people ask why I like certain girls ! say that they have a cool facial expression, they just stand out. Nobody ever gets what I mean. So many people just have this dead plastic look.
>>27885690
>why I like certain girls ! say that
>!
...What?
>>27885690
>>27885719
>!
Interesting. Why does it look like that? I typed an I
>>27885673
Hanks an even bigger cuck than John. Bet that bitch doesn't even fuck his cereal.
>"I don't understand why people say they love their wife when they won't share her with his friends, like, if I really loved fruit loops then I'd want my friends to experience how good they were too" - John Green, 2013
>"How come we're so willing to provide cereal for the underprivileged Africans yet not our spouses?" - John Green, 2009
john green sure likes his cereal analogies
>"I resent writers who try to make complicated story lines or analogies - the audience should be spoonfed. Take cereal for example" - John Green ; 2016-3
>I never really understood why that when people think of brutality, they think of the Mongols, it's as if you choose to eat Count Chocula not because it tastes good but because the color resembles my wife's fitness trainer. I mean it's not like my wife doesn't eat Cheerios every blue moon, but man does she gobbled down Cocoa puffs like it was her way of honoring Caesaro-Papism.
"You have two hands, you could use two spoons to eat your cereal but if your wife is double penetrated by two separate penises that's somehow crossing a line" - John Green, 2016
>"I like refugees. Hell, they can come over and fuck my wife." John Green
>>27884883
Does this gay cunt have any analogies not based on fucking cereal
>>27886301
Actually it probably blends better if it's smaller
>>27886320
with his record of cheerios based analogies, one could call him acereal offender
>>27885867
TOP KEK
O
P
K
E
K
Top kek
o
p
k
e
k
>>27884883
No, as long as you're not deformed, way too ugly, too fat or too stupid.
Just be clean, presentable and work on your social skill, if you're able to.
>>27884883
Holy shit this john green and the john green who does those history vlogs are the same person
I never knew this
...fuck
>>27885247
Kek we need to make this a new maymay.
>>27885532
Guys we need to make this a thing, like what we did with Zach Braff quotes a few years ago
>>27885016
God damn nigga, put down the bong.
>"If you have a guest over and you're both eating breakfast, it's only polite to be hospitable and offer them seconds; just as it is the social norm for them to accept! Likewise, if me and my newly divorced neighbor are having sex with my wife and we all finish, it's not uncouth for me to offer him another round and him to accept!" - John Green
>"I don't know why guys are so afraid of cuckolding, if you can't finish your cereal then someone else will"- John Green
>"My favorite type of cereal is one that can be shared. Women should be enjoyed by everybody!" - John Green
>"I'm always confused when straight man tell me they're disgusted by the thought of giving a blow job to another man. It's like you already like eating cereal, but can't handle drinking the milk" - John Green, Sex Machine
>"Guys shouldn't slut-shame, lots of guys ate Fruit Loops before you, big deal, that just means the Fruit loops must be good"- John Green
>>27885939
Kek my favorite one
>"I find it absurd that some men wouldn't raise another man's kids - if somebody leaves a plate of cereal unfinished, you step up to the plate and finish it off!" - John Green
>"Anal sex with women have always confused me. It's just so messy, gross and painful! It's like if somebody offered you a choice between eating cheerios and oatmeal, except your ass hurts like hell after you eat oatmeal." - John Green on pegging
"I have never understood why some men feel fine licking a woman's vagina, but when it comes to a man's butthole, they wouldn't think of it! I mean, you wouldn't pass up a bowl of cheerios just because they are in chocolate milk"
"So what if I'm into consensual cannibalism? My wife and I let our children grow until the age of nine or ten and then we eat them. Isn't it natural, to eat the things you own? Do you stock a pantry with cheerios and leave them for rodents?"
>>27885578
[my post is original just so you know]
>>27884883
Wanting to be around people because they're pretty is more like eating a really tasty cereal even if it has dubious nutrition.
>>27885390
this new meme is too EXTREME
>>27884883
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WU05hTgaUt8
>>27885565
virtue signalling for the express purpose of whoring for more views on youtube. do you think this guy is genuinely interested in south american history?
this new meme is is a really good meme
>>27885363
am i getting dubble goofed here?
>>27885011
I got excited for an ugly wife but found this
Fuck you, you lied
>in b4 pointy elbows 2/10
>implying you wouldn't kill for a woman like this to marry you
>"There's nothing wrong with sucking your own dick, it's just like having a bowl of cereal when you're bored and kinda hungry" - John "Cereal Killer" Green
post your original cereal OCs
>when Chad uses the last bit of milk you have to man up and put water in there
this thang really put a new perspective on memes for me, thx senpai
>>27888180
I love all of these but this one gave me a right giggle.
>>27884883
>this is the average white """""""""""""""""""man""""""""""""""""""" in 2016
>I don't under why people think it's disgusting for a man to watch his wife enjoy sex with another man. Would you think it was disgusting to watch her enjoying a book, or happily eating a bowl of Cheerios?
-John "Cuck machine" Green
>I've always thought of jews like the raisins in Raisin Bran Crunch. Nobody likes them, they're honestly disgusting, but it's too much of a pain to pick them out and discard them. A great man tried once.
-John Green
