OkCupid
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You are currently reading a thread in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001
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![20160414_122935[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/UFpDYmT.jpg "20160414_122935[1].jpg")
I decided to try and stop being alone, and created an OkCupid account. Is my profile cringey?
>>27865312
>really good at being average
>wants to be an investment banking analyst
sorry to break it to you senpai, average people have a lot of trouble getting a job as an investment banking analysts
>>27865312
>extremely cringy
also nobody reads the profiles it's all about the face CUZZZZ
>>27865312
i made this last night, being as truthful as i could be.
no one has messaged me yet but im hopeful.
>>27865312
If you have to ask it probably is.
My dorm internet won't let me download such a big file but it's clear you made some effort doing it the same way I put some effort writing this totally pointless post.
What?
>>27865312
Yes. Very cringey. And boring (without being successful) which is even worse. No interesting hobbies, ambitions, or tastes. The :3 face? Are you kidding me? You have no shot.
>>27865379
You look like Vadim Newquist.
>>27865379
Ebin maymay post, simply ebin
>:3
>Internet Shenanigans
>I'm really good at being average
far as I got, very cringy, sounds desperate, and boring as fuck
btw no one reads profiles longer than a couple sentences.
>>27865312
Might work, leave it up for a week and see what you get.
My advice however,
Be minimalist but honest.
Make jokes but don't self abase.
Your profile reads like a nerdy girl's profile, drop the smiley faces and show a little egotism, pride and indifference.
>>27865379
christian,
ewww
>>27865472
>Internet Shenanigans
How else am I going to say that I concern troll people?
>>27865312
It's not cringy, just remove that ":3" smiley imo desu senpai
Good luck OP!
>>27865369
>>27865472
>>27865474
I don't understand the criticism about the length. I looked at the profiles of people I was interested in (mostly tumbler tier chicks, graphic designers, and atheist edgelords desu,) and matched the length.
>>27865388
But, I do have ambitions. It says in the first paragraph that I want to be an Investment Banking Analyst, which is a very competitive field. It also says in the second paragraph that I'm starting to program, which isn't that ambitious, but still shows that I have goals.
>>27865754
Mimicry is about the worst strategy to adopt here.
Keep it short so you don't reveal what could potentially be a red flag.
You want to be mysterious enough to fit into someone's fantasy boyfriend's shoes so they message you and get the ball rolling.
That's the theory anyway. Maybe spilling your guts works better. I get more attention after slashing my profile in half.
>>27865973
>>27865754
>asks for criticism
>doesn't take it
Your profile is boring as fuck and cringey. All you're saying is "I want to do x thing, oh also I do other boring needy shit no one cares about." You barely even talk about yourself as a person and your personality. A dating profile isn't a resume. Unless you're looking for gold diggers, focus less on how much you wanna be big shot bank man and more about how you have an interesting personality. It seems like you barely put any effort into this, op.
What is your personality like? What are your positive and negative qualities? Sell yourself on your interesting, positive ones and be honest about your negative ones, but downplay them a little. Idk man.
>>27865312
1. When the first thing you list as being into is "finance, math, and computers" it's a potential red flag for an antisocial person.
2. "I like to debate" is a potential red flag for an argumentative dick.
3. Your goal in life is boring and not worth mentioning in a profile.
4. You explain to everyone that your day to day life involves nothing social whatsoever.
5. "really good at being average" misplaced humility, makes you seem even more unremarkable. You need something to appeal to someone.
5. Keep the books down to three or four, and put a couple tv shows or movies if you can. Something that a person is likely to recognize, like the Shawshank Redemption or something. At least it would be something to talk about, no one is going to hit you up about those books.
6. Puzzle Books? Really?
7. "I spend most of my time thinking about interesting arguments, technology, politics" Boring and awkward. If you don't have something interesting to put for a section make a joke. Say "Life and stuff" or something.
8. Really driving home the computer thing. Like you really, really badly want people to know that you spend too much time on the computer, and no one finds that appealing.
9. "Long term dating" nail in the coffin. No one is going to pursue a long term relationship based on an OKcupid profile, you have to do short term dating to determine who you're going to long term date. You're way too imposing to demand long term, serious relationships from OKcupid.
Basically, you've included nothing in this profile to make yourself appealing to a girl. Nothing at all. You're honest, but you need to be measured with your honesty in scenarios like this. Why would anyone want to date someone when all they know about them is that they have fucking STEM hobbies and spend too much time on the computer, with no apparent social life. That's fine if you don't have a good social life, most of us don't, but don't go screaming about it to people who you want to date you.
>>27866166
Not op here
>Say "Life and stuff" or something.
Last I checked, op isn't trying to appear as a 17 year old hipster
>"Long term dating" nail in the coffin. No one is going to pursue a long term relationship based on an OKcupid profile, you have to do short term dating to determine who you're going to long term date. You're way too imposing to demand long term, serious relationships from OKcupid.
>you shouldn't use a dating site to find a long term relationship
Are you retarded or are you just a professor of bro psychology?
>>27865379
Why not this pic you 3 inch cock fag?
>>27865379
I want to suck your little penis and fondle your anus as your cry onto my chest. I love you.
>>27865312
better do not do anything
>>27866106
But, I didn't put that in there to show that I want to be a "big shot bank man" I put it in there, because I absolutely love finance and economics, and could talk about it all day long. I don't really care about being a "big shot" I care about reading spreadsheets, because I'm really fucking autistic. However you did make me realize that I need to expound on why I want to go into finance, so I sound interesting, and don't just sound like "hurr durr money."
>>27866559
You're missing the point and sort of getting it at the same time. I wasn't saying you wanna be a big shot, I was saying that no one cares about finance. Don't even bother with why you want to go into it. Just mention that you're going into it and that's it. Like I said, a dating profile isn't a resume. Talk about YOU, not your career. Describe yourself to me, anon.
>>27866703
Well, I wish I could tell you something different bout myself, however I chose finance as a career, because it covers all of my interests. So, no matter how I word my profile I'll still be talking about finance. Besides that my only other interests are computers, Parametric Marxist theory, and Anarcho-Syndicalism.
>>27866166
Thank you so much, you gave me some good ideas for changes to my profile.
>>27866843
Good luck anon
Blox blox blox
>>27867028
Thanks, I need the luck, and a lot of it.
>>27865312
Wow OP I also just made my account yesterday, no prodile pictures or essay, just liked a few chicks and messaged two but they didn't message back
Let me know how it goes for you I think I will post a picture when I get /fit/
>>27865312
Most times being so self-deprecating isn't endearing. unless you're a 10/10 who's trying to be modest. You just make it abundantly clear to who ever's reading that you aren't worth much.
>>27865379
You look like Charlie from its always sunny, but with longer more messed up hair
HAHA, I'm a fucking failure.
>>27867249
Wrong thread faggot
Blozblox
>make OKC
>don't even fill it out because I don't think it will work
>profile name is cartoonfrog
>same day I make it, get messaged by some black girl who seems really interested
Don't even say it's because I'm Chad. I'm ginger and I wear cuck glasses.
>>27865312
>like to debate
consider changing "debate" discuss
>like when people have a different opinion
good, keep this.
>long walks on the beach
are you fucking with me dude
>Internet Shenanigans
Bud, you're on OKC, and you're not out pounding pussy IRL. So, every girl that comes to your profile, is gonna have somewhere in the back of her mind that their might be something wrong with you. And you've already referenced computers twice (so far). Do you really need to drive the nail into your own coffin here?
>i'm really good at being average
This is so uncreative, you might as well just say "I'm really good at not being able to describe what I'm good at." If I'm a girl, so far there hasn't been a single thing on your profile that's made me laugh or think you're clever, and I might even stop reading right here.
>books
(Nice taste man). Don't lead with Camus. Remove Hitchens.
>pretty much any music
I'm starting to think this is a troll.
>six things
Do you realize how fucking boring this sounds? Btw, everyone and their mother lists "coffee".
>thinking about technology
You've already referenced computers three times so far. She gets it. You're a nerd.
>on a typical Friday night
holy fuck. How are you this autistic. Just leave this section blank or say something ironic. It's fine to be all "oh I'm antisocial sometimes" but your entire profile SCREAMS loser.
>you should message me if
I'm not at all convinced you're a weirdo. You haven't been quirky, witty, clever, original, creative, etc.
This needs a LOT of work, man.
>>27868165
>long walks on the beach
Yes, I'm joking. I live in central Texas, so to the people here it's a bit more obvious.
Also thanks for the feedback. I've got some changes to make.
>>27865312
1) wrote too much
2) look at the profiles of chads and copy their shit
3) ????
4) drown in pucci
Here's how you can improve your profile:
>make an OKC account pretending to be a girl
>think about the type of girl you're likely to get matched with
>think of how she would answer OKC questions
>answer about 50 questions they way you think your match would answer
>browse your sock accounts matches
>these guys are your competition
>study what they put on their accounts
I'm not saying emulate them, but you do need to educate yourself. Also, if you currently have any pictures of yourself uploaded, remove them now. No one will be able to see your account while you don't have any pictures uploaded, and you REALLY don't want want some potential match to see your account as it is now.
>>27868406
Sorry if it seems like I'm being hard on you. One thing you have going for you is that your account isn't cringey, so at least you've got some instinct for not being cringey. It's just that it's not fun to read. More so than anything you want your profile to be fun to read.
>>27865379
You look a bit like Sagan, the cyclist, with a beard.
>>27868546
Nah, it doesn't seem that way at all. Things can always be improved.
>>27866559
Maybe being interesting isn't your thing pal. Probably wait until AFTER you make money to try okcupid.
>>27868406
But that still doesn't really make it a joke. Jokes are funny. That isn't.
girls don't message on okcupid, you have to do it yourself
they all have tons of horny chads on them already
don't wait
message as any as possible and you'll get some answers... maybe..
>>27868984
>girls don't message on okcupid, you have to do it yourself
>>27868860
What is "funny" is subjective. My statement uses a stereotypical "overly romantic" self description, and subverts it in a playful way through lack of plausibility. It's clearly a joke. A lame one, but still a joke.
>>27869096
I agree that the joke has potential but I suggest trying to improve the delivery.
>>27869096
As a comedian, I can tell you that it your joke is objectively not funny. If there was a punchline there, it would be called hack. You managed to do worse than hack.
>My hobbies include
Get rid of that or reword it. It sounds too formal. Like the kind of thing a non-native schoolkid might say, or as if you're putting it on your resume.
![Screenshot_20160414-171952[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/WaTloAm.jpg "Screenshot_20160414-171952[1].jpg")
>>27865312
Thanks for all of your suggestions guys. I haven't been able to implement all of your suggestions, however I do think that my profile has improved.
>>27869329
You should get hobbies that don't make you seem like a total loser. Your profile screams "I'm too boring to have friends".
>:3
Yes. Dont even need to read the rest of it.
>>27869329
better, still needs work. Good job leading with Palahnuik. Women fucking love Palahnuik
>>27869395
>tfw you are pretty much Denny from Choke.
>>27869329
>improved
Get rid of "I listen to a wide variety of music", because EVERYONE does. We just don't tell everyone because that's lame. It's like putting "I breathe air" as a hobby.
