who here /devilish/?
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>go to pick up my pizza
>chill black guy working as always
>says my order has a few minutes to go
>frown because I said I'd pick it up at 4 and it's already 4:05
>says I can take the extra few minutes to fill out a survey and help him out
>survey gives $10 off $20 on next purchase
>says if I fill it out in store and give all 5 stars, he'll give me an extra 10 dollars off
>figure what the hell, fill it out
>while I'm filling it out, big black bitch comes waddling in
>guy rings her up and says it'll be a few minutes
>I finish my survey and show him, he slips me a 10 dollar gift card in my order
>fat bitch asks the guy for a cup of ranch
>tells her it's 50 cents, but she can have it for free if she fills out her survey
>I leave and don't tell her I got 10 dollars for the same survey
>>27706108
>wake up
>need to pee badly
>someone in the toilet
>piss in bathtub
>have to put gas in my car because it's on the E
>tell my dad he can borrow my car
>free gas and no going out in public
If you didn't already, you now have someone to ask for weed.
>>27706108
>girlfriend tells me to take out the trash
>don't
>Mom tells me to go to job fair thing
>I don't
>>27706108
>go to the supermarket just before they shut
>masturbate in the toilet
>cum into my underwear and put it back on
>rub my hand over my sodden crotch
>rub all the fresh fruit and veg
>Room mate always pestered me about never going out and doing anything social
>Tells me I'm going to be alone forever and never have kids
>He is always fucking his ex after they go out drinking
>I poke holes in all his condoms
>Few weeks later he comes to me freaking out about her being preggo, thinks she is fucking another guy
>Months later he finds the truth out that it is his
>Mfw he has to pay child support for the next 18 years
>really need a job
>see help wanted poster
>don't go in to apply
>>27708111
trips of terror
