If I killed myself could I pay you guys to attend my funeral to make it look like I had friends?
>>27678474
I would go even if you didn't pay me, assuming you lived even remotely near me.
>>27678474
You couldn't pay people enough to pretend to like you, filthy NEET virgin.
Don't worry, no one else will go to your funeral. It would be like it had never happened
>>27678474
if u want an international friend at your funeral u can pay for my ticket+ 5 days of living expenses. I would like a vacation.
You better not have it on a weekend.
>>27678474
They would only realise you died because of your stench getting (somehow) worse than it already is and giving your neighbors and wild animals diarrhea
>>27678474
Is there food afterwards?
(even captcha agrees)
Sure, if you're in CO.
Might even be able to drum up extras.
Do you want us to pretend we knew you or just be present?
advertise it'll have an open bar in your obituary. half the town will show up
I would go if you paid travel cost and board. Shit I'd pay for my own food and stuff.
>>27678514
screencapped and sent this to the police
>>27678474
Are you in that bad situation?
OP, i was thinking about this exact same occurrence recently. If you were in FL id go without taking money from your grieving parents.
>>27678474
>If I killed myself could I pay you guys
no, because you would be dead
dead people can't pay for things
>>27678474
where are you from?
same question, Israel here.
>>27678474
>implying you won't be dumped at sea
