Anyone else here use a period tracking app to track how often you've masturbate?
How often do you flick the bean?
>>27649389
In march I flicked 27 times, but I feel that surely I'm on the more conservative side despite my best efforts
>Implying girls do it more than once a week
>>27649412
That's pretty hot, anon. Good vibrations.
I fap two to four times a day. Beat that, easymodes.
>>27649464
Noice. I'd like to have that stamina but my treasure needs time to recover.
>>27649426
Implying you have proof that they don't
>keeping track
>implying you don't do it every day
>implying you don't do it basically the whole time you're at home alone
r-right guys?
>>27649590
I feel ya sis
All day every day
>>27649590
I get a bit of a thrill knowing how many times I've orgasmed per month, that's why I keep track ;)
>tfw bed looks like a murder scene
>>27649483
I'm a dude, ho.
>>27649641
Ahh I see I have fallen into a snafu. However I'm sure there are many fems who flick it equally.
>skip showers for days
>roll hair up in a ball and pin it to my head so you can't tell how dirty it is
>fap
>sniff hands
>fap multiple times per day
>don't wash hands after
>wipe ass
>look at it
>eat food
>throw plate/wrapper on the floor
>get ants
>febreeze them to death instead of cleaning up trash or putting out poison
>work in the food industry
>spit in food if people are rude to me
>get scab
>add it to scab book
>forget to clean inner ridges of ears
>scrape pile of dead skin off ears every month or so
>notice toenails are long
>peel them off
>sweaty
>sniff armpits
There's more but I can't think of everything
>>27649766
Let's bone Britfem.
>>27649639
I thought that was the plastercast interior of an old building
>>27649639
Thank you for this disgusting post
It is just the right amount of disgusting
>>27649766
Also
>really enjoy farting and smelling my farts
>>27649781
We only get this gross in burgerland, sorry
>>27649815
You guys have febreeze?! I thought it was an exclusively Brit brand. weird.
>>27649766
Nicee we are pretty much on the same level in that regard.
How grisly of an appearance is your face? on a scale of 1 to death
>>27649766
Half of that is kawaii.
How fat are you and how many men have you had sex with?
>>27649766
Are you also fat?
>>27649831
I've always meant to ask, do you guys have Taco Bell?
>>27649831
>>27649815
>>27649781
INITIATE GRAVITATIONAL FIELD.
ORBIT VECTORS CALCULATED.
FEMBOT GRAVITY PULLING ANON INTO ORBIT. COLLISION TRAJECTORIES SET FOR BLACK HOLE
>>27649845
Nope we don't. The closest thing to Taco Bell would be subway probably, unless you can find some local place that does it.this is going to turn into a theme
Do you have Nando's?
>>27649868
BRACE FOR IMPACT
COLISION IN T MINUS 5
4
3
"god help us"
2
[Radio static]
>>27649838
>>27649841
>>27649845
>>
>>27649845
>>27649869
source: http://orbitingfrog.com/tag/earths-orbit-around-the-sun/
>>27649836
I'm pretty ugly
If I took care of myself, I think I'd be about a four, but I don't, so I'm civered in acne pick marks and black heads
Also I have a really big nose
>>27649838
>>27649838
I'm actually not fat, but that's only because I have type one diabetes and periodically give myself ketones so I stay skinny
And I've fucked two guys
One was way grosser than me, but he got really abusive so I dumped him
The other was a chad who liked me as a friend and got too drunk with me one night
>>27649766
I only take a shower/bath when I leave the house which is about once every two months
>pick nose/ears
>eat it since too lazy to get tissue
>>27649869
We have Subway!
Never heard of Nandos though
>Anyone else here use a period tracking app to track how often you've masturbate?
I'm extremely OCD, but i only track my periods which - thankfully - are very regular these days.
I also have very meticulous toilet habits.
I masturbate 2-5 times a day, when ever I'm idle, bored, tense, and... well, anytime I feel like it.
Jeez, OP. Now I have to start keeping track of that too!
>>27649929
do you like poptarts?
and can i get that numbrrrrrrrrr pls :]
I'm a normal girl who doesn't masturbate. I don't do anything too gross.
>>27649929
How do ugly girls make male friends? It seems like only pretty girls have male friends
>>27650026
does Chad keep you satisfied?
>>27650013
I do
Drop skype senpai
>>27650028
You have to stay friends with them through middle/high school
They will get fucking furious if you get drunk and fuck though lmao
>>27649929
>And I've fucked two guys
>>27650010
>I masturbate 2-5 times a day
That's pretty stellar.
>>27650050
>this is what date rape can do for you
>>27650047
>They will get fucking furious if you get drunk and fuck though lmao
How can they be mad if they were involved too? How did that even happen?
>>27650064
As I said, I'm very OCD...
>sniff and suck my own toes when masturbating
r9k did this
>>27650050
desu that's pretty moderate, I'm going towards my 4th girl now (all in relationships, long term) and it's not so bad.
>>27650101
That's a bit weirdcontact?
>>27650098
>I'm very OCD...
What does that have to do with it? I don't get it.
>>27650047
>tfw fembot hollaback[email protected]
holla at chu.
I pick me ear for earwax, pick lips and feet for loose skin, take beoken mails and flick it all on the floor.
>>27650071
fuck off and kill yourself you dumb roastie slut
>>27650026
And don't change a thing about that fambot
>>27650119
Why so angry brobot?
What are other orbiters listening to?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b0jqPvpn3sY
>these morons trying to catch a gf in here
>>27650108
I mean, a girl that nasty and ugly can do it no problem while a guy like her would be hopeless.
Hope none of you use a vibrator. That will fuck you up
>>27650149
>not wanting a disgusting partner
norman
>>27650086
Because they didn't really wanna fuck an uggo, he was just drunk and horny and I was willing
It's basically the same as when girls fuck a guy when they're drunk then regret it the next day
Except for guys don't tell everyone it was rape, they just stop hanging out with you
>>27650114I'm on mobile cuz my internet is down rn, I'll add you when I get it back
>>27650119
aaaaayy lmao girls can rape too, equality for all
>>27650166
>wanting some busted out old slut who can't even keep care of herself
>>27650164
I disagree, I'm pretty shit tier in terms of looks (bad teeth, 5'7, glasses, pectus excavatum) and genetics. It's a number and luck game desu
>>27650186
>Because they didn't really wanna fuck an uggo, he was just drunk and horny and I was willing
This is the best kind of sex.
>>27650149
Shut up!! I just want to be fembots friend. Don't get mad cuz im stylin on u
>>27650148
listening to AmCo https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zol2MJf6XNEv=zol2MJf6XNE
Any other girls been sick enough that they've peed themselves?
>>27650200
how is it the best? sarcasm?
>>27650200
Yeah man, totally worth itnot really, I want to die lol
>>27650165
But it feels so good. Mine is so loud i can only use it when my parents are outside of the house.
>>27650201
Nice, Animal collective are pretty comfy, nothing like listening to some good tunes whilst having a puff on cancer sticks.
>>27650210
I accidentally shit myself once when I was sick
I thought it was a fart
Turned out to be diarrhea
>>27650211
Not sarcasm. I don't know why, it just sounds really appealing to me.
>>27650186
You're so full of it lol just give me your number
>>27650210
I think i got a uti once from masturbating too much and lost control of my bladder. Luckily no one was there so i just walked away.l
>>27650186
>tfw I'll never get you drunk and fuck your brains out
>>27650210do you like watersports?
>>27649464
3-5 wanks on a good day
my pb is 9 but was just coughing dust clouds on 8-9
>when masturbations lost it's fun your fucking lazy
Reminder that atheist femanons are all unattractive by default
>>27650148
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i3AtRBlRQ-I
Comfy female voices in songs are best.
>>27650235
it just sounds really appealing to me.
sex with an ugly woman? what the hell?
>>27650310
It's fun cuz we expect to be rejected afterward, so the bar is set very low
>>27650310
Yeah. I don't mind ugly girls. I think I figured it out, it's how convenient it sounds. Being drunk and horny and having a willing girl available right next to you. Seems nice. I like being drunk and horny and I often am.
>"hey guys I'm a grill. Haha I masterbate just like the guys"
>>27650310
>>27650332
>>27650334
Is that all you niggers think about is sex and your fapping stuff with your wieners and vajinas and penises and all that stuff?
the best part about gfs is having someone to hangout with and do ebin activities and adventrues with
>>27650356
Girls don't want to have adventures. What does that even mean?
>>27650356
This is what happens when people are virgins for a really long time.
>>27650356
I am not a naive 15 year old with hopes and dreams, no. Quite the opposite.
>>27650224
Enjoy never being able to get off without it. Female death grip is a thing.
>>27650383
>Implying they don't want to be whisked away and taken all over the world
>>27650356
Bitch if you're ugly no one wants to go on adventures with you
A desperate, intoxicated screw is the best some of us can hope for
>>27650425
I'll be your bf and go on adventures with you if you're nice :3
>>27650408
^^^^this
Not a vibrator, but I've been getting off in a very aggressive way since I was seven, and it's literally the only way I can do it
>>27650441
>a very aggressive way
Please describe, sounds hot.
>>27650441
A-aggressive?
>>27650408
B ut i do that all the time because my parents barely leave the house. Do you have a story to tell us? Don't be shy. Lets hear it.
reminder that if a woman masturbates she deserves to be beat
>inb4 white knights
>>27650383
girls just want to have fun desu.
you can't just stimulate they pussies you have to fuck their mind to with fun experienc
>>27650384
the sex game isn't all it was cut out to be it's overrated
>>27650388
>>27650425
fuck tha world it ain't real i bend the spoon with my mind
>>27650513
I feel like once i have sex ill stop obsessing over it.
>>27650430
>if you're nice
welp
>>27650449
>>27650457
I have to use both hands, and press as hard as I can
No hole stuff
It's not very interesting
>>27650542
Can confirm, once you eventually do lose that V plate, you do feel a lot less pressure and think about it less.
>>27650588
>welp
By nice I mean you'd care about me
Not act cuddly
No, because I masturbate daily, no need to track it lel.
Gross things? I don't wash my hands after I do it. If I have guests over and shit and they touch my hand, well...
>>27650588
>welp
You're in luck, I like mean girls.
>>27650626
Fuck off cuck I was here first
>>27650588
>>27650588
>>27650588
>>27650588
oh knice havve you ever tried pulling your panties up very aggressively like so much it hurts a bit 'til they eventually rip
i always wanted to do that to a girl
>>27650542
I'm not so sure about that. I was also obsessing over it before but after I got laid it became even worse. I get depressed and unmotivated if I don't get the D and obsess over which of my friends or some new guy I can fuck to get my fix.
>>27650634
Theres more than one grill in this thread
>>27650464
>have gf
>eat her out, she said it was good
>after a while she asks me if I can use a vibrator on her
>do it
>she cums buckets, way more than from me
>ask her if it felt better than me
>she he says yes
>start doubting she came from me in the first place
>pressure her and she admits it
>feel extremely worthless now
>she tells me bullshit like she was thinking of me while I was using it
>tell her it doesn't matter
>break up later because I couldnt get it out of my head and nothing I could do was enough for her to get off
Girls using a vibrator are a giant redflag from now on. I know it's harder for them to masturbate but I won't take the risk of being this humiliated again.
>>27649371
My gf uses a period tracking app on my phone for blood and sex, sometimes both.
Her phone is a piece of shit.
>>27650634
>>27650626
>>27650604
i already got dibs niggers i gave her my skype
idk if she'll hollaback she might be an obese neckbeard. better luck next time fellas
>>27650644
But it'll be different for me because ill get a bf before i lose it. I hope he's understanding and not a meanie
>>27650644
Call me if you need a fix?
>>27650604
>>27650626drop them skypes
>>27650641
Actually yes
They didn't rip though
>>27650648
>have gf
Stopped reading there
Fuck off normie shitt
>>27650681
>skypes
No because I'm not interested in sharing
>>27650648
Just because she doesn't orgizzm doesn't mean she wasn't feeling ur vibes anon.
Femalez are susceptible to desensitization thru fapping as well.
it's no dig on your manliness or sexual prowess, friend
>>27650682
How else would I know about roasties getting hooked on vibrators?
>>27650648
Its not hard to masturbate with a hand if you know what to do with it. Im sorry you had to go through that anon.
>>27650660
I thought you were a grill too0:lmao top teir battle tactic my man, you get points for that
>>27650699
Don't care
GET THE FUCK OUT STUPID FUCKING NORMIE
>>27650681
Sure, my skype is: gaspforabreath
>>27650694
To me it makes me feel worthless. If I can't make her orgasm I have no purpose. Its extremely important to me and if the only way she can do it with her rubber friend there is no need for me to be there. I want to make her feel good and not through some proxy.
>>27650648
Lmao you're a fucking failure. Most girls can't get off nearly as easily to a guy as with a vibrator. Get over it you worthless cuck.
>>27650703
For some it is.
>>27650760
All it takes is practice it took me like two hours the first time i did it and now it takes me 5-10 minutes
>>27650681
That's tight bb. You smart. You very smart. Matter fact you a genius.
1 more have you ever been spanked?
Not in the fun way, but like hardcore bent over someones knee and spanked for being a bad girl when you did something bad?
>>27650711
Do you want me to be a girl?
>>27650753
it was not about getting her off being harder . It was her only getting off with it. I tried all I could think off and it didn't work. That and the fact she lied to me just fucked me up.
>>27650775
Shut the fuck up fucking faggot
Go back to >>>/r/eddit/
>>27650786
Kill yourself faggot
You're j
>>27650775
How do I suddenly know that you're from India/some sandnigger country
>>27650731
Did you get proper foreplay in: like make out with her, let her straddle you, rub her pussy from the outside of her jeans, until she want it bad and unzip your crotch and suck your cock and then you basically jackie chan flip her around into a 69 for a while and then you just go to town man lol
>>27650786
You sound very sensitive
>>27650816
Yes we did. Usually making out first and then moving on to oral or me being all over her body. She always was wet so she was plenty aroused and it wasn't a matter of a few minutes either. I'll have a hard time trusting women from now on.
>>27650816
CHAD FUCK OFF
>>27650869
KILL YOURSELF YOU FUCKING NORMALFAG CUNT
YOU WILL ALWAYS BE WORTHLESS TO WOMEN
>>27650869
Because a vibrator is a better man then you?
>>27650832
you wouldn't be fucked up after that? A girl lying to you about you giving her pleasure and pretty much telling you you are worse than some piece of rubber? I have my issues that's why I went here in the first place but how could a guy just stomach that as if it's no big deal?
>>27650891
I know I will never be able to compete with how a vibrator feels. But if that's the only way for someone to get off then I don't think I can stay with that person. And the trust issues mostly due to the fact that she lied to me all the times about me doing a good job.
>>27650913
You're putting words in her mouth because you are insecure. I'm a girl btw and if i suck at sex (dint know since bfless virgin) i would ask him how to make it better and do it more until i was good.
>>27650794
y u mad ffam
>>27650804
here's a pic ffam
>>27650869
Did you spank her real good and hard for having that dildo and tell her that she's not allowed anymore.
It's honestly not on you senpai. If she's degenerate into vibrators her pussy was probably desensitized. That's why you gotta pull their pants down and spank them real hard until they cry. and then steal their clothes and make them clean your house. Don't give them any attention unless they do something good then you can reward them with attention or sex if they're lucky. They'll pick up on it pretty quickly if you train them right
>>27650961
So she fakes it and it hurt your feelings? She probably said that to make you feel better because you act like this and if that were the case you should have kept trying until you made her squirm
>>27650987
Fuck off you damn faggot
>>27650987
What the fuck is wrong with you pajeet?
>>27650961
>getting made insecure by a small battery powered motor
wew men
>>27650971
Then why not tell me right away? Why wait months to do so? I expected her to tell me since I did the same to her about bjs. But instead I hear it much later. And then telling me it's no big deal I think of you when you use thst vibe xD is just a slap in the face. Fuck vibrators and fuck lying cunts
>>27651030
>being this butthurt over a vibrator and grill trying to spare your feelings
Must be nice having chad problems.
>>27649845
>>27649869
Actually we do have taco bell I looked up but there is only 3 in the entire country kek
yo any of you girls with stinky farts that like the way the smell and want to make a guy smell them get @ me
>>27650995
Dont fake it and tell me instead what's wrong. After she told me all about it I tried it for a long time. It seemed like she felt good but she didn't finish. Just breaks your spirit and makes you feel worthless.
>>27651030
>>27650995
bro ur overreacting she didn't say anything because she was satisfied just fine by you. some girls very rarely have orgasms they are peculiar pieces of poon that need to be fucked in a very specific way.
Also did u try double penetrating her with the vibrator
>>27651007
Have you even seen some of those things? And even small ones can have very strong vibrations. Not sure how a woman would feel if I could only orgasm using my superfleshligh extra tight.
>>27651078
She told me she had an orgasm. Thats lying straight in my face. I know it's harder for girls but don't lie to me. I will not use such a thing during sex ever again.
>>27651084
not give a shit because its just masturbation?
Shout out to all the nasty fembots out there keep it tight
>>27651052
Shout out to my boy King Void he's a str8 up dude and Gentleman. Any of u hos would be lucky to hav him 4real
>>27651121
Which is a mortal sin
>>27650259
Those arnt the words to that song...
>>27651128
thank you my niggah it's 10 here and I'm drunk wyd
>>27651107
Awww shit my bad she a ho for real.
It's not your fault u aint kno she was a creepy girl addicted to masturbatin that's hella weird
>>27651128
What's wrong with your finger
>>27651154
why the fuck are there niggers on 4chan
leave
>>27651167
make me whitbois
>>27651107
Reminds me of a Seinfeld episode where Eileen admitted she always faked it with jerry
Kek
>>27651121
So we have sex I tell you it was great then roll over and pull out my fleshlight to make myself cum. How does that make you feel? I'm pretty sure after a while it would get to you that nothing you can do is good enough. If you bring it into the bedroom it's not just masturbating anymore.
>>27651185
It feels terrible. You think you are doing good and suddenly you learn you are not good enough. Fucks with your self confidence.
>>27651153
lol nice gettin a head start.
& not much G haven't slept all night trying to find some stims so i can reset my sleep cycle.
how are we gonna get these femanons to start puttin out? These dirty fuckin skanks want it bad and they know it
>>27651235
You really need to get over yourself.
>>27651236
idk they are afraid of anything other than milquetoast dudes
i need them to be dirty sluts and do what i tell them to do, even if i require them to sexually dominant me
i doubt they are experienced enough to do so correctly tho
free spankings to all you idiot femanons who need to be punished
I'm in virginia come get me
>>27651275
Nah women need to stop being lying cunts.
>>27649929
>not even a 4/10
>still able to fuck two guys being this unhygienic and gross
You really don't need any more proof that women live life on easy mode...
>>27651296
If she told you you wouldve just broken up with her whining on/r9k/ a place for robots and not normalfags like yourself
>masturbate by rubbing stuffed animals noses on my click since I was like 6
>pee on the a tiny bit because it feels good
>lend these stuffies to friends
>pick nose and wipe it under desk, side of bed, bed frame, nightstand for years
Thank god I forced myself out of that
>fart and sometimes the bubble gets trapped in labia and tickles as it wiggles up
>pulling hair out of ass crack
>scraping lint and smegma off of the inside of my labia
>pulling back clit hood to find smegma treasure trove
>digging under toe nails for cheese and smelling it
>pick ears to the point of bleeding and then pick the scabs
>>27651337
No I would have asked her what to do different. Tell her to drop the vibe for a while while we work things out.
>>27651276
>i doubt they are experienced enough to do so correctly tho
Just be careful with the spanking bro bc It confuses their tiny brains when you use it for positive reinforcement. It has to be for Actual punishment.
>virginia
find some qt cia girls i bet they are crazy down with it
>>27651405
>r9k providing sage advice
I'd rather have a russian double agent mistress but i like your style man
chicks come and go i normally just wait it out and they pop up but sometimes I'm horny enough to seek them out
finished all the alcohol
>>27651377
be my human filth gf
>>27650028
I get along better with dudes, 75% of girls hate my guts. I'm fat and ugly.
>>27650648
Insecure fag, I bought my gf a vibrator, but she says that she prefers just me so we don't use it. Kek
>>27651196
highly illegal to say but sex is more about emotionally connecting than physical pleasure and (like you're going to be able to jerk yourself off better than I can but that doesnt mean I wont give you a handjob because its a nice and hot thing to share together) and I wouldnt have a problem with using a fleshlight on you if you wanted
>>27651606
Please as if you wouldn't get insecure and think something is wrong with you if the only way for me to orgasm was a fleshlight. Neither your ass hands mouth or vagina feeling good enough.
>>27651782
sorry for not being as insecure and shallow as you lmao
I also could never make you feel as good as a vibrator on your prostate but I'm not going to get triggered by you using one
>>27649371
When did it become acceptable to have these cancerous threads? Fuck off to Tumblr
>>27651802
How is it shallow that I want to be the one that makes her feel good? Insecure maybe but so are most women. I know enough that will start doubting them self if that would happen. I'm also not a degenerate that sticks things up his butt so I'll never have an issue with that.
>>27651433
true that. filthies aren't usually worth wasting energy pursuing. a wise man once said 'you pay them to leave' regarding hookers
>>27649412
>can literally cum limitlessly
>still doesn't even masturbate every day of the month AT LEAST
female sexuality is odd
>>27649766
>>27649639
>>27649929
>>27650186
>>27651377
Just saying, you femanons sound pretty hot.
I'd date you~
>>27651475
Where did you meet them all?
