I was severely depressed for about a week, triggered by an extremely ugly breakup with my boyfriend, who was my first love. I didn't eat, didn't sleep, couldn't function. The breakup unlocked some horrific memories of sexual abuse that I had suffered as a young child that I kept repressed for a very long time.
That evening, we had another argument. It was brutal. You see, I had made the mistake of going on a date during the previous summer with someone else. I was 19, and I was self-destructive. Every time I had something in my life that made me happy, I found a way to ruin it. He found out about it, and that led to us breaking up.
That night, the words flew. Slut. Whore. He was hurt, and he wanted me to hurt. I retreated to my dorm room, sobbing. I locked my door, found the economy sized bottle of aspirin my mother had sent with me to school, sat at my desk with my jug of crystal light, and started swallowing handfuls of pills.
It took me about 20 minutes to swallow most of the bottle, which contained 800 aspirin. By that time, my ex was knocking on the door, to apologize. I advised him to go away and let me die. He was immediately alarmed, and went to find my roommate, who came back and opened our door. They looked at me, found the bottle. She dragged me to the bathroom while he went to get our RA. She tried to make me vomit, tried sticking her fingers down my throat, and I kept fighting her off.
>>27617134
The ambulance came. I was taken away in front of everyone on my floor. My parents were called by my roommate. Thankfully, I had choose a college 20 minutes from my hometown. I'll never forget the looks on their faces as they ran into the ER that night. I'll never forget my mother slapping me across my face as she sobbed and screamed "Why??" My father, crying and pulling her off of me. I am their only child.
That night, I tell them of the abuse I endured as a small child. My mother is inconsolable. She blames herself, she keeps apologizing to me, she is angry at herself that she didn't know and that I've carried this for so long. My father is angry. He wants blood. They both let me know that they love me and will support me in any way necessary. They don't leave the hospital that night.
I am admitted into the ICU, and forced to drink liquid charcoal. It is the nastiest substance I've ever encountered. It coats my teeth, tongue, mouth-everything is black and gritty. Mixing it with sprite does not help. I am catheterized. I am also restrained for the first 24 hours. The nurses are not kind to me, nor are they gentle, with one exception. There was one nurse who was exceptionally kind, who would spend extra time with me, knowing I was scared to death.
After two visits with a psychiatrist and a fight from my parents to keep me out of the county's psych ward, I am released after three days. I have minor liver damage. I am extremely lucky. I go right back to my dorm, I talk to my friends, and am honest about what happened. I see a therapist, I am diagnosed with depression, and much later with other issues. Life goes on, but it was changed forever.
Bottom line, I regret it. Not for me, but because of the pain I put the people I love and the people who love me through. Even 20 years later, this was extremely difficult to write about.
>>27617134
can you lick my frenulum, please?
>>27617134
You sound like a drama queen
>>27617134
Kill your self you dumb slut
You don't know pain
You don't know what it's like to be alone
You are trash. A roastie.
>>27617134
>Letting them know you're attempting suicide so they can save you
What an attention whore
Why are women so useless?
>>27617134
Are you OK now?
>>27617134
>Marilyn DeMont
Interesting image to pick.
>>27617150
>even 20 years later
You're a 39 year old woman on 4chan?
>>27617288
>indulging this shit
get out
>>27617134
> severely depressed
> about a week
Stopped reading, you're full of shit, fuck you op
>>27617310
This wtf. How much you want to be this only happened like no more than 2 years ago and she's still trying to get attention
>>27617134
>>27617150
See >>27617212
>>27617134
yummy pasta
I think the point she is trying to make is that all the suicidal robots on here should think twice before committing to that option; it might just end up ruining your body and your relationships.
>>27617134
>>27617150
fuck off roastie cunt. like >>27617212
said, you do not know pain. you do not know what it feels like to be truly lonely. you do not know what it feels like to he helpless and uncared for. I bet you have at least one beta orbiter, which, whether you like it or not, means you are not alone and are always recieving attention. also, like>>27617241 said, if you weren't attention whoring you wouldn't go advertising your suicide (>implying this story is true)
also you're not a 39 year old woman. either a) you're an attention whoring cunt or b) you're a fat neckbeard who is posting pasta and acting like he is a female
tl;dr you're a attention whoring bitch and you need to leave and never come back
Nobody cares you brain dead histrionic whore, you didn't cheat on your boyfriend because you got diddled as a kid, you cheated on him because you're a woman.
>>27617693
why would a person who wants to die worry about their health and relationships?
>>27617150
>Even 20 years later
how old are you bitch
>>27617728
This. Even at 39 she's still denying any agency for her actions. Cumdumpsters gonna cumdumpster.
>failing for obvious bait
top kek you retarded virgins
